worst comment ever made about your weight

I had been dating a guy pretty seriously, and I was explaining to him that the way he said things sometimes hurt my feelings. I was basically giving him an ultimatum: be nice or I'm done.
He apologized, asked for my forgiveness, and said "nobody is perfect, for example, I still love you even though you are fat."

My brother died a few years ago. I flew to Chicago for the services and to be with my family....we aren't terribly close, but of course I would be there for this. I hadn't seen my mom in a couple of years (no, no estrangement, just circumstances). I walked into the funeral home and the first words out of her mouth are "oh, look, you've lost some weight". The woman is at her son's funeral, and seeing her daughter and grand-daughter for the first time in a while...and THATS what she's focused on? Cutting her lots of slack for being upset and all.....but still, jeez, is it any wonder I have problems with self-acceptance and weight issues?
I know she meant to be supportive. She always does. And it always hurts.

From my father:
"you're getting pretty God damned broad in the beam".

I was 25. 5'6" and about 130LBS.

sheesh!

ps: the beam, in father speak, would be my *kitten*.

From a colleague and friend?......"The incredible expanding Dr. G*******" ........ It did however motivate me to do something about it.

I'll never forget mine!

I had picked out my prom dress for senior prom. I went for my fitting and brought my mom. I was not a dress person, so this was the first dress I had worn since my mother was dressing me (so...kindergarden? Ha ha!). I loved the dress, and felt great in it! I couldn't wait to show her!

Well, she took one look and the first thing she said was, "Honey, you really need to lose weight."

Not the worst comment for a person to make, but coming from her at that moment? I was crushed! I instantly felt fat and gross in it. I had already put my downpayment on it, so I had to I buy the dress even though I felt horrible in it. It made me feel fat and disgusting during prom, and its only now (I'm 29) when I'm even considering trying a dress on again.

Now that I'm getting married soon, I'm still debating whether or not I want my mother present during wedding dress hunting and fittings.

I'm so sorry. This makes me sad as a mother. I hope I haven't said things that hurt my daughter in this way - but we all do say hurtful things to family members without realizing or meaning to hurt them. I hope you can forgive your mother. I know she didn't realize how that comment made you feel. You should tell her about this and then invite her to go with you to buy your wedding dress. Give her a second chance. I'm sure she wants to be there with you.

The worst thing I ever heard was "When is the baby due". That was about a year ago. I looked at the patient and said 17 years ago.

A couple years ago I got a part in my school play, the teacher was doing the usual "we can kick anyone out if you miss practice, if you're not committed, we'll be glad of the spare room on the stage" and one girl looked at me and said "they should just get rid of the fat people and then they'd have plenty more room on the stage"

Another thing that bugged me was I always got parts for fat old women.

My ex and I were in Florida with the kids and when I got home, I saw he took a picture of me walking on the beach. It was nice picture, I wasn't in in bad shape then. My ex said, "I took that so you could see how fat you are!". I am about 5'6", and at the time probaby weighed about 160. I'm a big girl, and have a really large top, so 160 doesn't look bad for me. This is one of the many reasons he is my EX!

Most of the worst comments I have had have been from family, and a few from nasty exes. The one that will ALWAYS stay in my head was from my grandmother when I was about 9 or 10, who told me that she wouldn't come to my wedding if I was "waddling down the aisle". I ended up with very bad eating habits after that and through my teens.

Some people have no idea what effect they are having. And some people know exactly what effect they're having and use it as a form of psychological abuse. If the former, I'd recommend telling them what effect they're having, if the latter, RUN FOR THE HILLS!

(And to @auticus at the beginning of this thread, I am so glad that said ex wife, those are some pretty disgusting things to do/say. My boyfriend's ex pulled the same s*** with him and the effect on self esteem is just devastating. Also, love the pic!)

It is amazing how cruel people can be. In my experience, the reason most rude people feel the need to say things like this is they are miserable about all the internal things they hate about themselves that aren't outwardly visible to others. They are so wrapped up in their own vanity that they know they are mostly empty inside. Because of this, they choose to point out visible things on others that they assume that person is unhappy about to try to make them as miserable as they are.

I can tell you one thing...when people say things like that to me, I embarrass them so publicly that they regret it and I would hope never do it again.

Here's the thing. Saying things like this is easy. It takes little to no effort and these "people" feel a little better about themselves. It's junior high or high school all over again. But is anyone saying to them "you just slapped me across the face with your words" or "I KNOW you are less than perfect. How's your anger problem coming along? Have you lived up to all those things you promised your marriage partner? Are you earning the $ you dreamed about when you were young? Why haven't you painted your house yet - can't dig up the motivation? Have you ever tried to get up at 5:00 am in the dead of winter to go running, or work out at the gym? How are your dreams coming along anyway - written that novel you've been talking about since you were 21?" All those things that prove they are less than who they want to be but you can't see it when you walk up to them. Our challenge can be seen by all.

For the words you've all expressed here, for the hurts from those you love and those who don't even know you. I will stand for those who've said those awful words, hold your face in my hands and tell you - YOU ARE WORTH IT. You MATTER. You are IMPORTANT to so many people. You might not know it, they might not tell you, but you ARE. Don't stop. Don't let them win. I agree with my brother - turn it into motivation. Metabolize it into one more reason to eat a good meal, instead of an emotional meal. One we don't even taste. One we're eating so we can feel better. And I second the motion another brother wrote - dude your armor photo ROCKS! Go running in that next time and see if that pitiful gym rat wants to take a swing at you with his words.

And I can speak on one more thing having traveled this fitness, weigh, eating, fit, out of shape, puffy, fat, slender for awhile, feeling young, feeling old, clothes don't fit anymore - gotta buy bigger clothes - OK now months later, they fit again - but do I throw away the fat clothes? The fear, the excitement, the frustration at how LONG it all takes, how SLOW it all is - that road - this road. It's about today, it's not about the day you'll hit your goal weight or fit into your skinny jeans - yeah us guys have those too. It's about doing the thing that's going in the right direction TODAY. Eating a good meal. Tastes great, fills you up, and you feel good after - not that carb coma after an emotional meal. Walking a little, not a marathon, just a good walk around the block, smelling the spring time air, feeling the sun. Spending some time on this blog, reading from our brothers and sisters in this fight, this journey. People who get it, who've lived where we are, who are going to get up tomorrow, monday morning, and commit to one more day of fitness, of working to understand why we are where we are with our thoughts, emotions, health, clothes, feelings.

Have a beautiful sunday. Feel the hug, the pat on the back, the smile of understanding I'm sending to you.

my ex high school sweetheart....stupidly i got back with him recently after losing 25 pounds and toning up (old habits die hard ugh). he said `eat a cheeseburger because i miss the clap your *kitten* had in high school` UGH.

it just made me feel like a piece of meat.

oh man... people can be so inconsiderate sometimes.. I have a couple stories!

1. I worked at a coffee house during high school/college. After coming back from school for summer break, one of the regulars told me " boy you really gained the freshmen 15 huh?" That sucked...

2. When I was younger, I remember going into the fridge and getting something to eat and my grandmother would be pointing at me and then puffing out her cheeks and making a big belly motion with her hands- implying that if I ate I was going to get fat.

3. Just a few weeks ago, my boyfriends friend described a girl and said that she had the same body type as me -> "thick". I have lost about 25 lbs and I'm still considered thick?? I weigh 118 at 5'3'' and I'm thick????? He tried to fix it by saying that I was athletically thick.... still I was so upset I don't think I ate the next day.

I was in junior high and we had to write down our height and weight for our graduation gowns. The teacher sent around another student to collect the papers. The b!tch opened mine and read my disgusting weight (which was well into the 200's) out loud, to which everyone started chanting the number and continued to refer to me by that number for the remainder of the year. To this day, I am still mortified just thinking about that moment. It is the day all of my insecurities took over my life and probably my most humiliating moment.

People make me so frickin mad! To every single person who has shared on this thread.. I admire every single one of you.

My story:

I was at my cousins engagement party in January , and I was the talk of the party because at the inevitable singing session that happens at family get togethers, I had the courage to sing for the first time, everyone was shocked because I'm too shy to sing but can sing pretty well. I took the limelight away from my Uncle (who used to be my favourite cool uncle). Once things had settled down we had a moment and he was saying how brilliant I was blah blah, and as he was talking I grabbed a little canape that was left over from the party, I had managed to resist all the bad food up to this point but was a little tipsy and starving so I indulged. My uncle then turned around and said " you really need to stop eating" .
I broke down completely. He was one of my heroes, a father figure because my dad was never one. What made it worse is that he weighs about 200lbs and at that time I was around 160. I'm now 143 and every time I think I'm too tired to go to the gym or crave junk food I think of that moment. In a way it was a motivation but it hurt like a B***h.

People can be so cruel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!