worst comment ever made about your weight
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I remember being at cinema with a friend years ago and he commented on someones weight in a really snide way. I was disgusted and told him so and now have just a hello/help you in a bind sorta friendship with him. An otherwise intelligent seemingly nice guy says horrible stuff. It sucks society feels you can comment on someones weight, racism isnt but weight is allowed I really don't understand why people pass comments on anyone else if they are in no way impacting your life. If someone is overweight walking down street, why comment?0
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"When is the new baby due!?" is always the worst. It's happened a few times, but it was probably worst from a 3 or 4 year old nephew of my boss, who asked, "is there a baby in your tummy?" and I had to explain no, that I was overweight.... "why?".... because I eat too much and don't exercise enough... "why?" because it's difficult to make those changes... "Oh, well it looks like there's a baby in your tummy. My mom had a baby in her tummy, and that's what it looks like."
The other awful moment was going to try on wedding dresses with my mom and a close friend. There was some medifast lady camped out a the David's Bridal preying on the insecurities of chunky brides like me. "You know even 20lbs would make her feel so much more confident..." in a hushed whisper to my mother.0 -
worst comment....mhhh......you dont look as heavy as you are0
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These two incidents actually happened when I had lost a lot of weight... Went to police station to get a form signed and the police woman told me I was the third pregnant woman in today!!!!! I said I was only ever pregnant six yrs previously... Tink she wished the ground would open up and swallow her... might teach her not to say somebody is pregnant unless sure!!!! needless to say I went home and eat all round me and piled all the weight bck on!!! The nxt incident came again when I lost a lot of weight I was out one night feeling absolutely brilliant about how good I looked and this older man started chatting with me and trying to set me up with his son who had his eye on me.. having right craic then he turned around and told me I shouldnt be drinking and in my condition!!! all my hard work went down the drain again and I just piled the weight on again ......... Point being no matter what I do or how much i weigh my belly just won't go normal
((((( so I just end up tinking what's the point like!!!!! People who know me tell me how brill I'm looking and complete strangers tink I'm preggers lol 0 -
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My cousin is younger than me and used to weigh much more than she does now. She lost a hell of lot of weight and went down to a UK size 8 from a size 18.
I recently had surgery and put on more weight than I normally carry. She sent me a message that said that people my size are a burden on society and that once people get as fat as me, they should be mortally ashamed of themselves. She also continued to say how women who are voluptuous aren't beautiful, but are plain ugly and simply obese. She left a tirade on facebook which offended plenty of my friends who are my size. Oh - I'm a UK 14.
Unfortunately I had already asked her to be a bridesmaid at my wedding. I can't bear the thought of her by my side judging me in my wedding dress. She seemed so much more tolerant of people when she herself was overweight, I feel really saddened she's changed this way.
Get rid of her as a bridesmaid, screw any family politics, it's your and your oh day and no one elses, she doesnt care for you in the slightest to say such things. Hope you've a lovely wedding whatever happens
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craic means havin fun in Ireland ... Just in case anybody thinks I mean it in any other way!!!:)0
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omg...just reading your stories hurts ME.0
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My husband and I were visiting his elderly aunt. As we were leaving she started talking about one of my husband's cousins who is also a large size lady. The aunt looked at me and said "You aren't nearly as grotesque as she is".
I think she thought she was giving me a compliment....0 -
Wow! Some really nasty comments!
I hope people realize that the "you have a nice face" or "you are so smart" or "insert nice comment here" is generally because people are trying to find a nice thing to say. The old tired axiom of "If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything" applies. They want to say something complimentary, and thats what they come up with, rather than realizing we can see ourselves in mirrors or in the size of clothing we wear.
Since grade school I have been the chunky kid, the heavyset one, the husky boy, lard *kitten* etc… I ended up being the outcast loner in high school due to just shunning people and learned how to ignore comments on my size/weight (6'3" tall and at my worst 265). I would also lash out at others more unfortunate than myself. For a kid, its not an unusual response, no one likes to be hated or tormented and you end up passing it on to try to feel better. Doesn't really work, but as I recall thats how it felt back then.
Last year was the straw that literally broke the camels back - threw my back out badly that I thought I had blown a disc, and it took four EMTs huffing along to get me out of the bedroom and into the ambulance. I was 265 lbs. On top of which my mother bluntly said that I had gotten fat. Gee thanks mom.
So now I am conscious of what I eat and calorie intake. Its making a difference and I am consistently loosing weight. Perhaps this time out, I will be trim and buff, like I was one summer when I went below 200lbs backpacking europe…0 -
I'll never forget mine!
I had picked out my prom dress for senior prom. I went for my fitting and brought my mom. I was not a dress person, so this was the first dress I had worn since my mother was dressing me (so...kindergarden? Ha ha!). I loved the dress, and felt great in it! I couldn't wait to show her!
Well, she took one look and the first thing she said was, "Honey, you really need to lose weight."
Not the worst comment for a person to make, but coming from her at that moment? I was crushed! I instantly felt fat and gross in it. I had already put my downpayment on it, so I had to I buy the dress even though I felt horrible in it. It made me feel fat and disgusting during prom, and its only now (I'm 29) when I'm even considering trying a dress on again.
Now that I'm getting married soon, I'm still debating whether or not I want my mother present during wedding dress hunting and fittings.
NOOOO!!! Don't take her! I bought my wedding dress a beautiful simple dress, off the shoulder with a lace-up back. My mom hated it and insisted on buying me a new dress. She got this horrible strapless ornate thing with pearls and gyms all over it. It was too short with heels and just not my style. I was not comfortable in it. I wore it cause it cost her $800 and she had to buy it for me and wouldn't take no for an answer. Luckily, we had a smaller ceremony in Europe for our friends and I wore my $20 gown. Don't take people with you that won't support your decisions, just saying.
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Something about mothers. It's a big day, and you know they want to be involved and it means a lot to them...yet they cann't resist pushing on those painfull buttons.
When I go shopping with my mum she does not look at style...she looks at how it covers and hides my shapes. She's been doing that since I was 12. I remember often the sales girls would try to defend me. But I could only hear my moms' words and thought she was right. I was wearing L and XL tops so you could not see my shapes. I was 5"2 and 140lbs. =.=
Now I live abroad and yes I have put on weight and she still makes comment every time she sees me.
* Be careful with some loose outfits, you may not realise you're getting bigger.
* You should try and loose weight, because there's so many things you cann't do when you're big.
* I don't think you should wear that at your size.
* Look at your cousins...our family is thin.
* Are you eating again?
* If I were you I wouldn't. No... you shouldn't... I don't think you can...
* Are you wearing that? Dear God!
* Are you hungry? are you sure you're not hungry? Yes you are...I bet you are...I am! Let me get you something.
By last year April I lost weight for my cousins wedding from 143 lbs to 125 lbs . Everyone in the family gave me compliment on how good and toned I looked and how my dress really suited me.
When I asked my mom if she had noticed I lost weight she replied (with a disgusted and terrified look on her face)
"WHAT? YOU WERE EVEN BIGGER THEN THIS?! (mind you I have had the same weight for 4 years)
I'm 31... and my mom is the MOST negative person towards my weight (others ppl may think, but don't say so)
Overall I think people I meet accept me fine the way I am and I always get compliments from strangers when I go out.
So I know I could be healthier and fitter and stronger... but I don't think I'm ugly when I'm bigger.
It's just it seems that MY WEIGHT IS AN EXCUSE TO PEOPLE TO BRING ME DOWN.
And I am guilty as charged...
Once I'll achieve my goal weight...there will be something else...0 -
Okay, hubby just did it. I know he didn't mean it the way it sounded, but if he is insecure then why should he bring me down, too? He came up to me while I was exercising and said, "You aren't going to get all good-looking and leave me, are you?" I responded with, "No. Are you saying I'm ugly now?" Him: "No, I just mean are you going to get skinny and leave me? You've been working so hard." WTF, dude??? I don't know if I'm just shell-shocked at the moment, but I'm probably not going to cry about it or anything. I just don't understand how he thinks that was appropriate! I get that he was trying to express his insecurities to me, but that stung a bit. Ugh.
I don't think he means you're ugly now and you'll be pretty when you get skinny.
He means:
"We both agreed that you are going to loose weight (for whatever reasons given), and your confidence will grow and your self-image will improve and you will feel more beautiful and stronger.
And I support you in achieving this.... Will I then still do???0 -
This just breaks my heart...nobody deserves to have such toxic people in their lives. You can absolutely be loved, even if it's not by the people who are "supposed" to love you the most. :flowerforyou:
I second this! I'm glad you're here where you can see people supporting one another. Some people just make my blood boil. Keep up the good work, dear!0 -
Okay, hubby just did it. I know he didn't mean it the way it sounded, but if he is insecure then why should he bring me down, too? He came up to me while I was exercising and said, "You aren't going to get all good-looking and leave me, are you?" I responded with, "No. Are you saying I'm ugly now?" Him: "No, I just mean are you going to get skinny and leave me? You've been working so hard." WTF, dude??? I don't know if I'm just shell-shocked at the moment, but I'm probably not going to cry about it or anything. I just don't understand how he thinks that was appropriate! I get that he was trying to express his insecurities to me, but that stung a bit. Ugh.
I don't think he means you're ugly now and you'll be pretty when you get skinny.
He means:
"We both agreed that you are going to loose weight (for whatever reasons given), and your confidence will grow and your self-image will improve and you will feel more beautiful and stronger.
And I support you in achieving this.... Will I then still do???
I absolutely agree with you...at least in my head. But it was still enough to plant that seed of doubt. "What if he thinks I'm ugly? Did he marry me because he didn't think he'd have to worry about me cheating?" I hate feeling like this, though, so I'm going to keep reminding myself of how he probably meant it rather than how he said it. Thanks 0 -
I was watching Biggest Loser with my then boyfriend and he told me I should learn something from watching it. What a jerk!!!
He also told me no one will want to marry me unless I lost weight and that I probably couldn't even run a few blocks I was so out
of shape. So cruel!0 -
From ex wife:
* "You're so fat... you're wasting my youth! I am embarrassed to be seen with you"
* During sex, she stops me in the middle of it and runs to the toilet and starts gagging and then says I disgust her.
Random assorted things from the years
* Running at the park, I pass a slender girl in her 20s who is running ackwardly. One of those lucky people that obviously never really does any exercise or doesn't know how to run at the least, but stays looking in shape. Her boyfriend is in front of her and he sees me pass her and goes "oh no! HELL NO! There's no way you just let that fat f**k pass you! Get your *kitten* moving!" He was one of those alpha types with the gym rat bodies.
* Running at the park during soccer practice with my team. Group of college girls is running. One points at me and says "ewww look at his belly".
* Running at the park I pass a guy and his little girl who are running. She says "daddy why did you let the fat man pass you?" And he replies "shhhh honey we don't call people fat that's not nice"
* At the gym, I smiled at a girl who looked at me like I was a cockroach and said "dream on, I don't date fatties".
* At one of our irish pubs a couple years ago. I was standing waiting in line and this guy was trying to impress his college-aged girlfriend. He started making rude comments about how fat people need removed from the planet because they are in his way and taking up space and eating all of the food. The girl giggles.
* At the gym I was in a corner doing some dumbbell work and this precious Barbie with full make up is lifting with her boyfriend. She was seated next to the rack where the weights were. I was putting my weights away and had to move around her and she gets this annoyed look on her face, and then turns to her boyfriend and says in a mock-whisper (so that others can hear) "I can't stand going to the gym during this time, too many fat people here wasting everybody's time"
I have more. Those were the ones that stuck out this morning. Being fat is the equivalent of being a leper in the middle ages. It's pretty dehumanizing... but makes for great motivation and fuel for your workouts.
That's horrible! I can't imagine how people can be so cruel!!!0 -
"You look like a beach ball with Arms!" oh and this one too, "Put your shirt back on, God is going to get mad!" :sad:0
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As sad as all these comments are....just think about the ones that don't have the nerve to say these things to your face. For every hurtful comment you hear, there are likely 10 that you don't.0
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I have one big one...
I was with my friends looking at peopleofwalmart.com... one of the guys who was bigger than me commented that the picture we were looking at and said that I was bigger than the person in the picture. The funny thing is that this comment gave me the motivation to lose my weight and that same guy is bigger than he was then.0 -
He did make me cry one time when I said "yes this time I'm going to stick to it" and he said "oh then you can be a bag of loose skin", but he wasn't trying to be mean LOL. I was also going through menopause at the time so I attributed my reaction to that.
I have to disagree with that.. He was trying to be mean. There's no way that's not a mean thing to say.0 -
I think the worst one that has been ever been said to me was when I was being bullied in 8th grade and not going to school because I was so scared of the torment. I was sent to the district for a talk and they said, "YOU have to change." I don't know why that has stuck with me for so long. Maybe because I have to change because some idiot decided to put ME down to get a laugh? How about no.
Then there were like situations that happened.
My ex-best friend ditched me in 6th grade. Every time I tried to go hang out with her in our usual spot, she would walk away.
Two girls I saw with together for a project in 11th grade would ALWAYS poke at my big arms.
I was running the mile in class in 12th grade (I took PE all 4 years to try and lose weight) and I even heard my TEACHER making fun of me when I ran by him.
There are a lot more from my school days but those always haunt me.0 -
I think the worst one that has been ever been said to me was when I was being bullied in 8th grade and not going to school because I was so scared of the torment. I was sent to the district for a talk and they said, "YOU have to change." I don't know why that has stuck with me for so long. Maybe because I have to change because some idiot decided to put ME down to get a laugh? How about no.
Then there were like situations that happened.
My ex-best friend ditched me in 6th grade. Every time I tried to go hang out with her in our usual spot, she would walk away.
Two girls I saw with together for a project in 11th grade would ALWAYS poke at my big arms.
I was running the mile in class in 12th grade (I took PE all 4 years to try and lose weight) and I even heard my TEACHER making fun of me when I ran by him.
There are a lot more from my school days but those always haunt me.
That's awful! I'm glad I never heard a teacher make fun of me...with the temper I had back then, it would've been ugly. Thank heavens we have this supportive community at mfp!0 -
My mom (also very obese at the time, funny enough) told me I was so fat I should just be melted down for candles.0
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From my dad while going through divorce: Keep losing that weight and you'll find somone else who will want to marry you!0
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i think the one that I will never forget was from my boyfriend......We were watching Miss COngeniality with Sandra Bullock, and the part where they make her over on 10 mins and she looks all hot....he told me...." I could make you look like that, I just need 6 months"0
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Having been on both sides of the spectrum - The super toned muscle guy and the fat blob, I can pretty much look in the mirror and call me out on most of the comments. I have never been a rude person, but I have not had issues with explaining to others how I felt if and when they said something to me.
I will admit that some of these posts are funny to me because I have thought them in my mind about myself.
Hence the MFP membership!0 -
I was dating a guy for a few weeks and all was going well. We went to dinner on a beautiful night to my fave beer garden pub. We were laughing and having great conversation and then he told me it sucked he could not introduce me to his friends. I asked why and he said, You are pretty and funny and cool but, I usually date thin girls, so they would not understand and would give him crap over it. I sat there stunned.
A few minutes later I excused my self to the restroom and left, jumped in my car and parked a couple blocks away and cried. I swore from that moment on I would never date anyone who could not accept fully, no matter what my weight is.
You go girl!!! Good for you!!! What a jerk!!!0 -
I have been called pretty much everything, but one thing that I want you to know is:
"Hurting people hurt people."
It's simple. People will try to bring you down no matter what and you just have to remember that you are you no matter your weight. Surround yourself with people who support you and your actions.0 -
In high school girls would purposely walk behind me just to tell me "get out of the way, fatass" or "wide load! watch for sudden stops!" And I was maybe only 140-150 at the time? (5'2".) Not good for a 14 yo's self confidence though. /:
Now people tell me "nothing will look good on a rail" and "don't you need a figure for x?"
Never gonna get a break.0 -
I am literally shocked by some of these comments that people got, I was overweight pretty much my WHOLE life (and not just a little heavy or chubby, but morbidly obese, over 300 lbs) and I never got ONE rude comment from anyone about my weight.
I do find now that I am a "normal" weight that people pay more attention to me, will hold doors, strike up random conversations and look me in the eye more, but I have never had anyone be blatantly rude to my face about my weight, even in grammar school and high school.0
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