People who complain they're fat but do nothing about it

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  • emmamcc1981
    emmamcc1981 Posts: 133 Member
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    sounds like a waste of gym membership money to me - but people do what they will, not alot you can do about it. xx
  • Tzippy7
    Tzippy7 Posts: 344 Member
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    That's the classic situation - as a guy I've experienced it a million times with girls. What's one of the major rules - when a girl complains she doesn't want you to tell her how to fix her problem, she just wants to ***** about it.

    Sounds like you offered enough advice to be helpful but not push it. After that it's on her. Some people like to be unhappy about something.

    People often know what they need to do but they want to vent about the situation first.
  • sdrawkcabynot
    sdrawkcabynot Posts: 466 Member
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    I would probably have quoted the research:

    'Research has proven that we over estimate our exercise and eat too much in response, so controlling calorie input is the only option.'

    (Rephrased to fit social situation ;) ).


    Aka - get an HRM and use MFP to track your calories! :) That should be on a tshirt!

    LIKE :)
    Had I felt she would have been receptive I def would have told her about MFP

    If she feels like she can openly complain, you have the right to openly give your opinion. If anything - if she doesn't like it - she won't complain to you anymore :D.

    I don't eat awesome ALL the time - but I do watch my sodium and still enjoy eating out occasionally... but I will be the first to throw out my opinion when someone says "I just had a salad"... Most salads are built to house as many calories as a cheeseburger... *smh*...

    PS - to the person that keeps talking about the OP "not letting it go"... it's her board... we all get worked up over different aspects in life - let her vent and have her fun.
  • Tzippy7
    Tzippy7 Posts: 344 Member
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    Trying to lose weight is very frustrating though, it might be a defense mechanism. I know I was frustrated that i gained 45 lbs while working out 6 days a week. People just gave me advice I was already taking, so you never really know what somones story is.
  • emmamcc1981
    emmamcc1981 Posts: 133 Member
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    My family always complained to me how I had a 'naturally high metabolism'. I exercised every day, I was a dancer, I ate better. They drank several glasses of pop a day, had large meals smothered in bad things that would impress truckers , and always ended up having snacks that equaled meals at night, with no exercise.

    OMG, are you me?

    lol Seriously describes my very overweight family

    and me. i did sports at school, swimming, horseriding, gymnastics - you name it. they would always ***** and snipe about how unfair it was i could eat what i wanted and not gain a lb. but they were fat and lazy and ate like pigs. and then after i left school i turned into a fat lazy pig just like them. lucky for *my* girls i'm back to being sporty and active and teaching them to have healthy attitudes to food.
  • HauteP1nk
    HauteP1nk Posts: 2,139 Member
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    I can't eat vegetables due to a medical condition and I still manage.

    Are you my forum stalker? lol
  • secretlobster
    secretlobster Posts: 3,566 Member
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    Not me, the day I had permission to start working out again after my accident, I was there. In fact, I used to sneak workouts when I thought I could get away with it.

    Congratulations on being you.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    Not me, the day I had permission to start working out again after my accident, I was there. In fact, I used to sneak workouts when I thought I could get away with it.

    Congratulations on being you.

    Congrats on being you too!!!
  • strunkm4
    strunkm4 Posts: 266
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    I live by the motto "you can't help someone else if they are not willing to help themselves". I let them ***** all the want and ignore it, because if they aren't doing anything to help themselves, why should i?
  • Rhea30
    Rhea30 Posts: 625 Member
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    I have complained about my weight before but mainly when its because I have done something which I thought would help it and didn't see results after the effort put in. I understand your point though and don't get either, I've seen people who complain about their weight but just don't want to do anything about it, then again they might had before and maybe just to a point where they have given up and don't feel it matters anymore. I've been close to that point but was lucky I got some insightful tips from some people, if I hadn't I probably would had given up and just figure 'this is it' and continue to complain. I think its nice that you try to give her advice since sometimes people do need that because they might be ignorant towards the subject but sad she didn't take in anything you had said :(
  • CookieCrumble
    CookieCrumble Posts: 221 Member
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    It depends how much interaction I have to have with them. Locker room chat wouldn't bother me at all - people can say what they like. I've been wearing a HRM these past few days and have been astonished at how few calories swimming burns compared with the MFP calculation. I mentioned it to a lady who was in the pool with me earlier and she said there must be something wrong with my monitor because "everyone knows that you have to eat lots of food to make up swimming calories". Fair enough...

    I used to be in an office with a woman (just she and I) who used to complain about her weight all the time and I got a bit bored of it - especially when she started making comments about mine - I just told her to "Do something about it if it bothers her - or stop going on about it" - and definitely stop dragging my weight into her complaint.

    I hope this thread isn't going to become a 'bash the fatties' kind of thing, it definitely has the potential - just depends how many pseudo-posters appear.
  • kelseyhere
    kelseyhere Posts: 1,123 Member
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    I sit next to a lady at work who is like this. Everyday she complains about her weight and how she wants to get back in shape but there are always so many excuses...
    ...my manager keeps scheduling meetings over my lunch break (this manager left the company a month ago and she doesn't have a new manager yet to schedule meetings- plus what about the 30 minutes you spent gossiping this morning instead of working)
    ....i don't have time to eat my breakfast or lunch so i binge! (your yogurt is in your lunch bag right next to you and you've been on the computer the past hour- you had plenty of time to eat)
    ....I travel too much and you can't workout at hotels and all the food in airports is bad (that's why i bring my own snacks when i travel, and i travel too and have been able to workout just fine- maybe every hotel doesn't have a weight room, but that doesn't stop you from doing crunches, push-ups, lunges, etc. in your room).

    Basically, I can come up with a simple solution to her every excuse. But do I? No. I tried for a while, but I've realized she has to make the decision to change. Until then, I lead by example squeezing in my lunch workouts when I can, eating my breakfast promptly by 9, eating my healthy lunches, etc. Hopefully it will click with her that I'm not doing anything that special, just exercising a few times a week and keeping my calories in check.

    But yes, this is super annoying behavior especially for a full grown adult. People need to take accountability for their health and stop blaming it on others and their circumstances. Obviously everyone here has already taken that first step though!
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
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    I have an extremely overweight friend who is always complaining about her weight...asking for advice and then shooting down everything I tell her. It's frustrating, I just tune her out now though. She'll never change!
  • Beauty0619
    Beauty0619 Posts: 39 Member
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    She isn't doing nothing about it. She is at the gym. That is at least a start. Everyone has to figure out their own way to get to their goal. Something has to click for her - not you - to get her to do the rest of the things she needs to do to lose the weight she wants to lose. At least she is up and moving at the gym. That is a heck of a lot better than a lot of people that complain about their weight.
    Generally I'd say they were just just complaining, but like you said, she was in a gym. So she's not really "doing nothing about it". She's trying but not having much success. Hopefully she figures out something that works for her.

    Now when someone is on the couch with Dorito dust covering their face.. THEY'RE not doing anything about it!

    I agree with these. I think she is there, trying to do SOMETHING about it. She will figure out a right fit for herself.

    I agee....she is there. so that's a start! everyone has to start somewhere. So if she is starting and complaining, so be it. She will get her lightbulb moment sooner or later.
    I too, was a complainer. "I want to lose weight so bad!", "I can't do that..." blah blah blah. It wasn't until I saw a picture of myself at a wedding that I decided I had to do something. My weightloss has been slow but steady. A year and 29lbs later, it has clicked and will continuing clicking!
  • charcharbec
    charcharbec Posts: 253 Member
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    I have found over my last year of eating healthy and exercising and my girlfriend not being interested AT ALL with this, that you really need to let people do it in their own time. My gf used to complain ALL the time about being overweight, and now finally has made the decision to actually DO SOMETHING about it. Honestly--- I am SUPER proud of her. She is working out consistently and trying to eat healthier. When people tell her WHAT to do or even suggest things to do she is very VERY resistant to it. She wants to figure it out on her own, in her own time. Learn her own lessons. I think that's the best way to do it. :) However, I do understand the feeling of frustration when people complain but don't want to change.
  • Ondreacrandall
    Ondreacrandall Posts: 43 Member
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    I agree. Be active about your own health and well being, or shut up about it.
  • chachita7
    chachita7 Posts: 996 Member
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    she might have been complaining but in reality she was doing something - at least she isn't still sitting on the couch... my response wouldn't had been a lil different - I would have told her about the site and how I have done it - her response on not changing what she is eating was exactly that no changing what she is eating to which I would have responded, I didn't go drastic change at first just portion control then lil by lil I started longing for other things...

    there is this misconception that you have to make a drastic change to accomplish your goals - that is not really the case, for some a drastic change is easier than for others. When I first started this eating a cheese burger happy meal rather than a big mac meal was success... or having a medium fry instead of the large was a success... drinking diet soda instead of regular soda <--- see what I am saying... over time I started experimenting with healthier choices

    Perhaps what this person needed was someone who could say to her... "You have already taken the first step, and 4 lbs lost is 4lbs lost, you don't have to change what you eat, just how much of it you eat and introduce lil by lil healthier choices"
  • HealthyBodySickMind
    HealthyBodySickMind Posts: 1,207 Member
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    ... She'll never change!

    This is an additute we need to avoid. Anyone one can change.
  • Scorpioangel
    Scorpioangel Posts: 951 Member
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    It annoys me to no end. I have been told it's just "too much work" and that they "don't have time" like everyone else has more than 24 hours in a day or something LOL :)
  • chachita7
    chachita7 Posts: 996 Member
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    The OP did say they were in the gym locker so she is doing something...

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