Really Funny Things To Do To Make People Uncomfortable!

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  • <~~Remembers one night in Downtown Chicago after a dinner date with the Wife (Now Ex) a group of kids pulled up next to us and aksed, "Do you have any Grey Poupon?" I naturally said, "no". They said, "We do!" Showed me the jar! Too funny!
  • _Bob_
    _Bob_ Posts: 1,487 Member
    my wife has introduced herself as one of my students and then she slaps my *kitten* and says, see you at the hotel around 8
  • doorki
    doorki Posts: 2,576 Member
    That is just perverted. People don't need jerks like you. Life is tough enough.

    Which one is perverted?
  • MeliciousGibson
    MeliciousGibson Posts: 248 Member
    :wink:
    That is just perverted. People don't need jerks like you. Life is tough enough.

    Yes, I admit, it can be perverted...but the chiropractor's office just LOVES it when I do that!

    Oddly enough, some people DO need jerks like me! It gives them something to complain about....:wink:

    Life is tough - but it's tougher without a sense of humor....
  • FireballStrike
    FireballStrike Posts: 85 Member
    The guys at work and I are constantly daring each other to impart random mischievous uncomfortableness while we're at lunch...the most recent? Me, asking a waitress if she wanted to join me and and my 'husbands' for a drink later. One guy was dared to walk up to the hottest woman in the place, take a drink from her glass, smile, set it down and walk away. Never a dull moment!
  • RunsForFood
    RunsForFood Posts: 110 Member
    When I was noticably pregnant and people would ask when I was due/how far along I would look at them in horror and say I wasn't pregnant. Their faces were the best thing EVER.

    Kind of wish I was pregnant all the time just to do this to people.....
  • moskinnny
    moskinnny Posts: 118
    As an amputee, there are times when I was out in public not wearing my prosthesis. Kids get the biggest kick out of looking, so when they do.....i just tell them "see what happens when you dont eat your vegtables"
  • tig_ol_bitties
    tig_ol_bitties Posts: 561 Member
    As an amputee, there are times when I was out in public not wearing my prosthesis. Kids get the biggest kick out of looking, so when they do.....i just tell them "see what happens when you dont eat your vegtables"

    You. Are. Awesome!
  • x__abbi__x
    x__abbi__x Posts: 97 Member
    I have bipolar so I'm classed as "mad" and one of my friends has a wicked sense of humour so we tend to make jokes about me being mad and we get stared at a lot.

    Also I tend to say to her how I know the perfect way to kill someone and bury them while looking at a certain person, this tends to freak them out... add a little whisper and my friend going "oooh so thats how" and a sympathetic look to the person i've been staring at. Works a treat x
  • danigirl1011
    danigirl1011 Posts: 314 Member
    I once had a friend who went to Walmart with me and saw a fake rooster on the shelf. He took it off and proceeded to walk around the store to every female employee asking if they liked his c*ck. Very embarassing
  • monipie
    monipie Posts: 280 Member
    i can do an awesome Russian accent- i make my husband very uncomfortable by acting like his mail order bride in public. it drives him nuts!
  • A freind of mine once ordered Turkey and Mashed potatoes with gravey for lunch. When we weren't looking he put some of the potatoes and gravy in a napklin. He then Sneezed, sorta blew his nose in the napkin. He then proceeds to look at it, gross look on his face and then proceeds to eat it! Ewwwwwwww!! But really funny!
  • paigemarie93
    paigemarie93 Posts: 778 Member
    Thank you for making me laugh - so many ideas. I'm not the one who does strange stuff but i have an autistic child who sometimes comes out with the worse things. The best though was that he got a balloon from McDonald's - sucked all the helium out and ran round the supermarket shouting Peanut butter jelly time.

    Another time he called me a drunkard in the supermarket car park and then asked what it was. ( both at full volume)

    Both my brothers are autistic, my little brother came into the living room the other day & went "Are you going to a funeral?" I replied 'No why'? he goes "because you're wearing all black".
    It was like 11pm & I *always* wear all black, he's a cutie, bless him.

    But lol, the peanut butter jelly time thing sounds like something he'd do!
  • Amberetta82
    Amberetta82 Posts: 153 Member
    Start talking about beads.
  • Best. Thread. Ever

    I sing out loud to myself .
  • doorki
    doorki Posts: 2,576 Member
    I tend to booty dance my wife whenever we are at the store.
  • tandroes
    tandroes Posts: 163 Member
    whenever you're in a restaurant and there are paper toilet seat covers,

    get one, put it around your neck, re-enter the restaurant

    and loudly tell people

    "hey look! free bibs in the bathroom!!"

    BRILLIANT. The man and me are going to a really nice restaurant tonight, and he embarrasses really easily...I will definitely be doing this in my nice dress and heels!

    Trying to stifle my laughing while at work!

    me too, it's not working!
  • phillbis
    phillbis Posts: 353 Member
    I know, nobody writes checks anymore but sometimes when I do and they ask for my drivers license I say I dont have one cuz I just got out of jail .....or even better, when I hand over my credit card I comment that I hope it works "cuz I just found it"..... or things like that. ITs probably extra funny to me because I am a retired police officer and 1 time I was in uniform on the way home from work and had to stop for groceries. I had my badge/gun/nametag everything on and wrote a check and really forgot my driver's license and even though I knew my DL number and wrote it on the check already for the clerk, he wasn't going to accept it cuz he couldnt verify that it was me? really :laugh:
    You then should have shot him and walked off saying, only because I can!
  • BlueInkDot
    BlueInkDot Posts: 702 Member
    Y'know when you go around a corner at work and there is inevitably another co-worker right there that you almost run into? Well I got sick of saying "oh, I'm sorry, excuse me" and switched to shouting "CRASH!!!!!!" and throwing my hands in the air.

    Much more interesting.
  • cabaray
    cabaray Posts: 971 Member
    If you want some great ideas, watch the show Impractical Jokers on TruTV. Awesome stuff there!
  • ak_in_ak
    ak_in_ak Posts: 657 Member
    My BF works nights, so we don't get to spend a lot of time together so we joke how we are really just roommates. When we run in to people he hasn't seen in a while from high school or something, he will introduce me as his roommate. The reactions are mixed but always funny.

    The one that always gets me embarrassed is when we have the dog in the car, or sometimes not, he will bark at cars...
    or when I am trying to adjust him or pick at something he will bark at me and it always scares the crap out of me.
  • ZombieChaser
    ZombieChaser Posts: 1,555 Member
    When a waiter or waitress hands me a fork and/or knife, I look at them and say: "sorry, the courts said I can't be around these anymore, do you have more spoons?"
  • tig_ol_bitties
    tig_ol_bitties Posts: 561 Member
    This yoga instructor is probably making people uncomfortable...

    yoga.jpg
  • DAMNCHARLIE
    DAMNCHARLIE Posts: 569
    Just take off running (say in the mall), you would be surprise how many people run with you
  • dmchiz
    dmchiz Posts: 184 Member
    I know, nobody writes checks anymore but sometimes when I do and they ask for my drivers license I say I dont have one cuz I just got out of jail .....or even better, when I hand over my credit card I comment that I hope it works "cuz I just found it"..... or things like that. ITs probably extra funny to me because I am a retired police officer and 1 time I was in uniform on the way home from work and had to stop for groceries. I had my badge/gun/nametag everything on and wrote a check and really forgot my driver's license and even though I knew my DL number and wrote it on the check already for the clerk, he wasn't going to accept it cuz he couldnt verify that it was me? really :laugh:
    You then should have shot him and walked off saying, only because I can!




    Too much paperwork! I made him call the manager over - who decided it probably was actually MY check!? and made him take it! lol
  • dmchiz
    dmchiz Posts: 184 Member
    When a waiter or waitress hands me a fork and/or knife, I look at them and say: "sorry, the courts said I can't be around these anymore, do you have more spoons?"




    Bahaha! THIS!
  • GymAnJuice
    GymAnJuice Posts: 512 Member
    As an amputee, there are times when I was out in public not wearing my prosthesis. Kids get the biggest kick out of looking, so when they do.....i just tell them "see what happens when you dont eat your vegtables"

    i had to stop reading after this post, my eyes teared up :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: wish you'd meet my son!
  • jackpotclown
    jackpotclown Posts: 3,275 Member
    I still miss the days when you walk into a restaurant and they ask if you have a smoking preference......yep, I got them EVERY time \m/
    crank
    mary J
    reefer
  • 76tech
    76tech Posts: 1,455 Member
    Here's a fun NYC subway trick.

    If I'm not getting off at the next station, I like to walk over to the doors that *aren't* going to open. And look at them expectantly.

    funny how many people follow me :laugh:
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    My maiden name was a very Irish name.

    When people ask 'Oh is that an Irish name?'
    I look at them totally straight faced and say 'No its a slave name'.

    I know..its pretty f'ed up but it always cracks me up. The best is when I would do it with my then husband next to me - who was white. They would always look at him like 'help me'
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