Newbies, beware.

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  • Chipmaniac
    Chipmaniac Posts: 642 Member
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    You do have the right to be as sensitive as you want, but starting another thread about how "ill treated" you were with one joke just makes you look like a whiny pseudo adult looking for a basketful of "there, there poor baby"s.

    Congratulations.
    And you fell right into her trap by responding.
  • Thomasm198
    Thomasm198 Posts: 3,189 Member
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    I actually do believe that the OP was very poorly treated. I responded to her original thread. Not everyone is obnoxious on MFP...as a rule, I usually ask my friends a question as the forum people are too preoccupied about debating fruit as sex toys etc to treat other people with dignity

    The OP was not poorly treated in the other thread.


    JOKE    noun, verb, joked, jok·ing.
    noun
    1. something said or done to provoke laughter or cause amusement, as a witticism, a short and amusing anecdote, or a prankish act: He tells very funny jokes. She played a joke on him.
    2. something that is amusing or ridiculous, especially because of being ludicrously inadequate or a sham; a thing, situation, or person laughed at rather than taken seriously; farce: Their pretense of generosity is a joke. An officer with no ability to command is a joke.
    3. a matter that need not be taken very seriously; trifling matter: The loss was no joke.
    4. something that does not present the expected challenge; something very easy: The test was a joke for the whole class.
    5. practical joke.
    verb (used without object)
    6. to speak or act in a playful or merry way: He was always joking with us.
    7. to say something in fun or teasing rather than in earnest; be facetious: He didn't really mean it, he was only joking.
  • acs4162
    acs4162 Posts: 99 Member
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    Oh, and don't log cleaning, no matter how vigorous. Because apparently only hard cardio or weight training is an acceptable method of burning calories.

    I log cleaning and bathing my toddlers. Anyone that thinks my household chores don't count as burning calories, is welcome to come over and give it a whirl! And anyone that believes that I should be doing cardio and weight training more, is welcome to teach 150 middle school students for me on Monday and then pay for a sitter so they can go to the gym/on a run.

    Haters are going to hate! I just try to surround myself with supportive and logically-minded people. Even my own husband tries to give me a hard time about not hitting the gym often enough, but I'm losing weight and toning up- so i just ignore him!

    Good Luck!
  • martestracy
    martestracy Posts: 1 Member
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    I am new here also, but I read your question and just saw something about this on The Biggest Loser, either Bob or Jillian. What they said is that no matter how many crunches you do, the muscle is what is getting worked, and the muscle is behind the layer of abdominal fat. So, they suggested that you had to change your diet, and lose the fat percentage, so that the toned muscle shows and the fat s then gone. Basically, it meant to cut your calories, but not below 1200 per day, and increase your exercise.:smile:
  • mrswilson0511
    mrswilson0511 Posts: 132 Member
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    the forums and be great tool and no so great! the first thing I do when I have a question is when you go to the message boards is hit the search button and type in part of your question or all of it and see what already comes up in the forums. Mainly with being new or not ussing the forums very often they are a great way to see if something has already been posted about whatever subject you are wondering about! Good luck!!
  • sandrajune72
    sandrajune72 Posts: 550
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    Thank you to all who have offered support. You have no idea how much I appreciate it! I am open to everyone's viewpoints, but I stand by my initial response that there is no need for cruel sarcasm. I will say no more on the subject! :flowerforyou:
  • editnonnalynn
    editnonnalynn Posts: 495 Member
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    I am new here also, but I read your question and just saw something about this on The Biggest Loser, either Bob or Jillian. What they said is that no matter how many crunches you do, the muscle is what is getting worked, and the muscle is behind the layer of abdominal fat. So, they suggested that you had to change your diet, and lose the fat percentage, so that the toned muscle shows and the fat s then gone. Basically, it meant to cut your calories, but not below 1200 per day, and increase your exercise.:smile:
    I think this is THE response the OP wanted/needed. Thanx!
  • NancyNiles
    NancyNiles Posts: 145 Member
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    If people would CHOOSE to be kinder than necessary when replying to threads (any threads, newbie, veterans, a question asked for the first time, a question asked for the millionth time....) then the drama would stop. Period.

    But getting nasty, vile and rude TROLLS to stop "joking" at other people's expenses is like trying to move a mountain with a teaspoon: You could work at it your whole life and never make a dent.

    Here are two quotes to keep in mind when bothering to reply to a thread you've opened....

    "Always be a little kinder than necessary. Everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle. ~T.H. Thompson and John Watson

    "Never miss an opportunity to make others happy, even if you have to leave them alone in order to do it." ~Author Unknown
    (I take the last one to mean, if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all... but this quote says it so much more elegantly!)

    And for the people defending the way the OP was treated in her last thread ....

    From the Urban Dictionary...

    1. Trolling

    Trolling is trying to get a rise out of someone. Forcing them to respond to you, either through wise-crackery, posting incorrect information, asking blatantly stupid questions, or other foolishness.

    I believe the majority of the responses to her perfectly reasonable question fall into the realm of trolling.

    I just call 'em like I see 'em.
  • armoredcore
    armoredcore Posts: 48 Member
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    im newb here too, im sorry that happened
  • Kamikazeflutterby
    Kamikazeflutterby Posts: 775 Member
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    You do have the right to be as sensitive as you want, but starting another thread about how "ill treated" you were with one joke just makes you look like a whiny pseudo adult looking for a basketful of "there, there poor baby"s.

    Congratulations.
    And you fell right into her trap by responding.

    I thought I heard Admiral Akbar's voice... [/Star Wars]
  • Steven
    Steven Posts: 593 MFP Moderator
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    Hi Folks,

    Please be aware that the staff at MyFitnessPal is onboard 100% with the concern that genuine requests for advice in the forums are sometimes met with ridicule and mockery.

    It's unfortunate that there are folks in the world who consider it amusing to respond to such posts with non-constructive, and unkind posts.

    However, this is exactly why we have moderators, guidelines, and a three-strikes system on the site. We don't want ANYONE to feel unsafe posting in the forums. You can help us to create the right atmosphere there by letting us know when posts are in violation of these guidelines: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/welcome/guidelines

    Typically, a first offense (or a second offense of a different guideline) will result simply in a deleted post and a "heads-up" warning. But repeat offenders do begin to accumulate strikes, and after three strikes users can no longer post to the public forums AT ALL. We've designed this system precisely to weed out those voices that can't keep their responses civil and helpful.

    We'd like to see the forums cleaned up as much as any user on the site. Please continue to post with a feeling of ownership of the forums, and then alert us if others are abusing the privilege. Every abuse report is evaluated by a moderator (some are staff, some are AMAZINGLY GENEROUS volunteers.) We can't get to each report immediately, but we will get to it. Help us help you by letting us know what's what.

    Regards,
    Steven
    MyFitnessPal Staff

    UPDATE: Please see my continuation to this post on page 6. I missed some very important points that I should have clarified when I posted yesterday.
  • Rays_Wife
    Rays_Wife Posts: 1,173 Member
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    Sorry you had a bad experience, that stinks. I've had a couple myself. There are lots of nice people here though, you just have to ignore the not so nice ones. Welcome to MFP, feel free to add me as a friend!! :flowerforyou:
  • Chipmaniac
    Chipmaniac Posts: 642 Member
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    The OP was not poorly treated in the other thread.
    We'll just have to agree to disagree there.
  • robin52077
    robin52077 Posts: 4,383 Member
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    Nothing in your original thread came off as rude. The cheeseburger comment was a (funny) joke...hence the laughing face emoticon...

    the person who suggested the search function was HELPFUL as most newbies do NOT realize it is even there and there is a wealth of info to be learned on ANY topic your heart desires, because I guarantee you whatever question YOU have, it HAS been asked and answered many times. you can learn a lot by searching.
  • carld256
    carld256 Posts: 855 Member
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    Maybe it's me, but I thought the Cheeseburger joke was pretty funny and not meant to be mean spirited at all.
  • jboccio90
    jboccio90 Posts: 644 Member
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    I am somewhat new to the fitness world, but wouldnt the comment about the cheeseburger be kinda correct?
    I have heard abs are made in kitchen and perfected in the gym, so maybe its not cheese burgers affecting ones stomach but diet is just as import as exercise.
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
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    Consider this- there was another thread going on at the same time in which a woman wrote a question asking how to tone her tummy. People tried to respond helpfully and there were a couple stock jokes mixed in, and the OP sort of flipped out and lashed out at everyone leading to a very long (like 150+ responses) very annoying, horrible thread. There were all kinds of bizarre things that happened in that thread, and I think it must have been deleted now because I can't find it. It got really nasty.

    Now, none of that had anything to do with you or your thread except that some people had just been put through the ringer for trying to help a (seemingly) similar question. In light of that, I actually think the responses you got were really mild. Plus, I don't think anyone intended to be offensive. Keep in mind that your question doesn't exist in a vacuum. The groups seem to be less mean-spirited, you might want to stick to groups and not the general forum if you can't ignore people you find obnoxious.
  • penrbrown
    penrbrown Posts: 2,685 Member
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    If people would CHOOSE to be kinder than necessary when replying to threads (any threads, newbie, veterans, a question asked for the first time, a question asked for the millionth time....) then the drama would stop. Period.

    But getting nasty, vile and rude TROLLS to stop "joking" at other people's expenses is like trying to move a mountain with a teaspoon: You could work at it your whole life and never make a dent.

    Here are two quotes to keep in mind when bothering to reply to a thread you've opened....

    "Always be a little kinder than necessary. Everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle. ~T.H. Thompson and John Watson

    "Never miss an opportunity to make others happy, even if you have to leave them alone in order to do it." ~Author Unknown
    (I take the last one to mean, if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all... but this quote says it so much more elegantly!)

    And for the people defending the way the OP was treated in her last thread ....

    From the Urban Dictionary...

    1. Trolling

    Trolling is trying to get a rise out of someone. Forcing them to respond to you, either through wise-crackery, posting incorrect information, asking blatantly stupid questions, or other foolishness.

    I believe the majority of the responses to her perfectly reasonable question fall into the realm of trolling.

    I just call 'em like I see 'em.

    I love this response. Well stated, thank you.
  • manda1002
    manda1002 Posts: 178 Member
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    I think that just because there's a laughing face emote after, that doesn't necessarily mean it's a joke. I could put a laughing face emote after everything I type, but that doesn't mean it's a joke. I could be putting that just to lessen the blow of the post.

    As for everyone saying use the search button, at what point is it kosher to make a post? Because how long has this website been up? Wouldn't everything have been asked now? If the people who have been on here for awhile are seeing the same things posted over and over, who cares? Don't respond to it. Just move to the next posting, and let the people who actually care to help others do so. For some people, those initial few posts (repeated questions or not) are a way of feeling out the people who are right now actively using the message boards, and seeing who can be possible friends.

    That's just how I feel.

    OP, for the most part, the message boards are a GREAT tool. Don't let the few bad you'll encounter cloud the many good that are out there. Congrats on joining MFP and taking that step to being a better new you :D
  • InnerFatGirl
    InnerFatGirl Posts: 2,687 Member
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    I know how you feel. Say one thing wrong here, or post in a way someone doesn't like, and everyone jumps on you. It's happened to me more than once, and as a result, I don't really feel fully confident starting new threads or even posting sometimes. But not everyone is horrible. I've met some really nice people on here, and the people on my friend's list are so encouraging. Big hugs, hun, and feel free to add me if you like :heart:

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