Heartbroke and defeated...

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Replies

  • Dayna154
    Dayna154 Posts: 910 Member
    You are giving up on the wrong person, you need to give up on the quack of a doc..
    I was told a while ago that some of us are 'big girls' by my old doc. She moved and it forced me to find a new one. Best medicine she ever gave me.
    I am now living again and feel so much better than I have in years. I dont have the amount to lose that you are looking at but was looking at 60#+ when I started and am over half way there.
    It has meant changing how I eat and what I eat, which seemed hard at first but once I got started (like within a few days) I felt so much better than I had in a long time I was hooked, now 7 months later Im still going. I done over a year of zumba and recently added strength training as well and feel better than I have in what now seems like forever..
    So DO NOT GIVE UP!!! You are worth the work. You CAN do this..
    You need a support system and you can have that here... at MFP...
    Add some new people and start fresh with a new attitude and perspective and start shopping for that new doctor!!
    Add me if you wish... I would be more than happy to cheer you along on your journey and have a great group of pals here that have helped me so far!! Good luck
  • Christylynnb
    Christylynnb Posts: 3
    "I think your Dr is the crazy one. I need to lose a lot more than your 100lbs, and there is no way I would consider a lapband. I need to do this by myself & for myself & not take the 'easy' way out."

    For those that think having surgery is the "easy way out" - you are wrong. You obviously don't know anything about being overweight or what is involved with weight loss surgery.
  • harleygaljojo
    harleygaljojo Posts: 111 Member
    Please don't ever give up. As you can see everyone on MFP are here to help support you. I have gained and lost so many pounds
    over the years and I'm still trying to get rid of it for good. I am so glad that my daughter told me about this sight. I feel this time when it is gone it will be gone for good. Always remember if you bite it write it, because even little samples cooking will add up to more than you think. I will be on MFP as long as it is here even after I get all the weight I want to lose off. I will be able to monitor and make sure it stays gone. You can do it.
  • Rdahl2
    Rdahl2 Posts: 90
    Time to find a new doctor. Your current one is an idiot.

    I agree 1000%!!! This doc sounds like he/she is trying to make some money. :grumble: You can definitely do it with a healthy eating lifestyle and exercise. Dont give up. We are all here for ya for support. Feel free to add me as well if you'de like. :happy:
  • kiminikimkim
    kiminikimkim Posts: 746 Member
    Lap band is calorie restriction, no? Just reduce your calorie intake, it's the same result as the lap band.
  • WaterBunnie
    WaterBunnie Posts: 1,371 Member
    Surgery is a big step. Open your diary up for your friends to see and weigh and log absolutely everything that passes your lips. You may find you're not quite as 'on target' with your diet as you thought you were and then could see the pounds shifting more quickly.
  • Hellbent_Heidi
    Hellbent_Heidi Posts: 3,669 Member
    I didn't read through all of the posts, but not everyone with an MD or DO after their name knows what the hell they're talking about.

    Find another doctor, and prove this idiot wrong. If you believe in yourself that you can do it, that's all that matters!
  • Emancipated_Tai
    Emancipated_Tai Posts: 751 Member
    Looking at your tracker, it seems as if you started at 220lbs? I started at 260!!! 9 months later I am now 208! This is a long process and it's not easy. I would suggest varying your workouts and food options. If you have been at it this long with no result that is a problem.

    Feel free to add me. Maybe I can offer some ideas for you. I know that I can offer support. You will get there!
  • lostsanity137
    lostsanity137 Posts: 298 Member
    Please copy this to your browser and watch...please don't give up...there is always hope. Feel free to add me as a friend.

    http://youtu.be/qX9FSZJu448

    That video was wonderful and inspiring. I even cried!
  • ThickNThunda
    ThickNThunda Posts: 71 Member
    Don't give up. I've been doing this for well over a year and have only dropped .5 lbs in the past 6 months. The important part is that you aren't giving up. I had a doctor that was constantly telling me that I was fat. So much to the point that I would be so nervous to go to her office, my blood pressure would be sky high. The best thing I did was to stop seeing her. Weight loss is just not easy for everyone. Some of us have to put in a lot of hard work. But it is good and fulfilling work. Please be proud of how much you have accomplished and don't give up. Feel free to add me if you would like. I need to lose over 100 lbs as well. And smile.
  • StarkLark
    StarkLark Posts: 476 Member
    Lap band is calorie restriction, no? Just reduce your calorie intake, it's the same result as the lap band.
    Could not agree more. Both surgery and regular weight loss require you to change your eating habits. Why not choose the path that doesn't require surgery. I think for some people the serious nature of the surgery and the commitment is enough to make the change, the surgery is just the tool that gets them there.
  • breezymom81
    breezymom81 Posts: 499 Member
    Y'all have been awsome! Thanks :flowerforyou: I do log everything I eat but frequently I do so on a journal at my desk. I will be the first to say that I do not always eat the best, I am spending my afternoon planning out some meals for my self with more chicken/turkey and pork. I went home so upset still and my husband vowed to eat what Ido so that I am not cooking 4 meals every meal (my children have extreme GI conditions - very limited food options) I will adjust my eating and log it all, keep working out b/c even if I am not loosing weight I am loosing inches :smile: and I feel so much better physically!

    I don't think my doctor is a bad dr I think she gave me a solution-just not the one I wanted but the one that she could offer.(even though she really shouldnt unless patients are looking for that). She knows that I don't have the extra $$$ to pay for a nutritionist- so she gave me the option that is covered by insurance. She does not perscribe diet pills and did say that is what most people who come to her about weight are looking for. After more then a year with a 30lb gain I am so frustrated that I can not describe it, I know only those on this site will understand the pain of this. Being told that I should seriously consider such a drastic step was horriable. It was also a wake up call- because I qualify for the lap band, the next time I see her I will not be a canidate for the surgury, that is my goal. BMI can kiss my *kitten* b/c I have muscle, I know this I am not going for the goal weight of 120(healthy bmi) Just around 150-160. I want the right solution not the fast one. Today I am more level headed and feel better- thanks all my wonderful MFP family! I love you all Have a FUNTASTIC Friday!!!
  • dogacreek
    dogacreek Posts: 289 Member
    Time to find a new doctor. Your current one is an idiot.

    ^^^^ This. I totally agree.

    I've lost 83 pounds by counting calories and then adding exercise. My average loss has been one pound a week, so that tells you how long I have been doing this. I may go a couple of weeks without losing or bouncing around and then boom... I'm down a few pounds. I am doing this slow...slow....slow, but I am still winning the battle. Don't get discouraged.

    I didn't start my logging on MFP, but another website, so all my records are there. I don't want to switch midstream, but MFP has the best forums for this journey. Embrace them.

    Good Luck
  • Munchkinxoxo
    Munchkinxoxo Posts: 18
    Just read your story. And I also think you need a new doctor.

    Dont give it up! You can do it!
    This site is fantastic for support and help along the way.
    Feel free to add me! we can support each other! :happy:
    That goes for anyone on here ..we always need people to turn too and help keep us motivated!
  • Bizeebec150
    Bizeebec150 Posts: 88
    Hang in there Breezymom81 - I have been where you are. I have lost almost 100 pounds and although it has been at times what felt like I would never get there I am now nearest my goal then ever and more motivated then when I first started.

    Don't let your "mind" defeat you. Just take it day by day, meal by meal, and don't beat yourself up. Stay positive, you can do it no matter how long it takes it is a journey and a lifestyle change.

    I believe in you, please keep believing in yourself!
  • thistimeismytime
    thistimeismytime Posts: 711 Member
    Please copy this to your browser and watch...please don't give up...there is always hope. Feel free to add me as a friend.

    http://youtu.be/qX9FSZJu448

    That video was wonderful and inspiring. I even cried!

    Me too...
    Totally agree...Never ever ever give up on yourself!!
  • Bizeebec150
    Bizeebec150 Posts: 88
    check out my website and follow me - my circle of friends and I are about motivation and positive encouragement (while being realistic)

    www.bizeebec.com
  • MzMandi1025
    MzMandi1025 Posts: 78 Member
    I was told by a trainer that I needed to lose 76 lbs just to get back to a healthy BMI, but I could probably lose at least 100lbs. I was also told to give myself at least 8mos to a year to get all of the weight off.
    I honestly think you should consult another doctor. Any kind of surgery is a temporary solution. When I first started working out, I didn't have my eating habits in line. I lost 5 lbs at first, but then my weight loss stalled because I wasn't eating correctly. I did this for 5 months. Then I started tracking my calories on here & in 2 months, I lost 9lbs. I've had my good days & I've had my bad days. I've had weeks where I didn't lose anything at all. The important thing is to keep at it. It will all catch up & fall into place.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,022 Member
    Sorry to hear that. But don't give in. We have a girl on our staff who lost 100lbs and I'm currently helping her to pass her PT certification because she wants so bad to be a trainer and share with people how she did it through proper eating and exercise.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • mariacolumbus
    mariacolumbus Posts: 227 Member
    I am so sorry you got this kind of advise from a doctor!!! you can lose weight naturally. It takes discipline and determination and you can do it. MFP is a great place for you!!

    Since you are starting Insanity I would suggest going the Beach Body section of MFP and finding a Beach Body coach. They are a great resource for all your questions.
    Good luck
    p.s. feel free to add me if you like :)
  • katie001x
    katie001x Posts: 19
    That is just absurd. I need to lose 135lbs and my doctor said nothing about being too big to lose the weight. Go to a different doctor! My mom and my sister have a hard time dropping their weight. But they can and so can you, it just might take longer depending on your body. My mom had the most horrible time losing weight. She ended up having to get surgery on her large intestine and was unable to eat solid food for a few weeks until it healed. She dropped 40lbs. After that 40lbs, she has just been doing awesome and keeping the weight off and losing a little more. I'm not saying go get surgery, but maybe look into a liquid diet (but only if you take your vitamins, you need to have your nutrients!) or try something different. Not sure exactly how you do with food, so can't tell you for sure what to change. Good luck!
  • rdy2lose
    rdy2lose Posts: 106
    Find a nutritionist and see if any visits are covered by your insurance, mine covers 6 visits per year.

    Doctors are taught to look for a medical solution which usually involves drugs or surgery, they are not taught nutrition. A good nutritionist would be a smart investment.

    Do you measure and log your food?. Studies have shown that people who log what they eat each day are more successful at losing weight and maintaining that weight loss once they get to goal.

    Perhaps you are building muscle when you work out, have you measured yourself? Have you lost any inches, do your clothes feel different?

    You can do it, it isn't easy, but it is worth it.

    I saw a thread on MFP the other day full of inspirational quotes. Look for that, it was really good.
  • Arthemise1
    Arthemise1 Posts: 365 Member
    I had a doctor tell me the same thing, and I cried in his office. I've been trying to lose weight my whole life, and nothing worked. At 40, it didn't look like anything ever would. I had the surgery, and I'm slowly losing weight. It's a tool, plain and simple, for people who have no other hope. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. I needed to try something I had never tried before, and for me that was surgery. It's not for everyone, but it was right for me. After I got over my emotional reaction, I decided it was what I needed to do so I could see my son grow up to be a man.
  • mamadragon
    mamadragon Posts: 110
    i so know how you feel. I''m there too , tired and fed up but I keep trying when I hit a low.
  • TBeverly49
    TBeverly49 Posts: 321 Member
    Its always one day at a time. and going the surgical route does not teach you how to loose weight or patience. Keep it up.
  • HowieTwoPointZero
    HowieTwoPointZero Posts: 494 Member
    So I have been at this for a while now and have lost 6 lbs, keep in mind to be at a "healthy BMI" I need to loose 100 but going for more like 66lbs...I work out everyday 7 days a week, wear a Polar F7 to track my burn eat pretty good and pour my heart and soul into weight loss. Today I went to the dr b/c I have been having such a hard time...she recommends that I consult a dr about a lap-band....:cry: Apparently I am so big that I have no hope of dropping of the weight. I'm sure she thinks I am crazy- I broke down and cried in her office. :embarassed: I am planning on starting Insanity Saturday- tomorrow is my last day of RI30 ( I have done 60day straight of Jillian) now I really don't see the point I am big - will always be big and the only thing to help is a surgury that I can not afford :frown: :cry:

    Thanks for the vent I needed it


    Any doctor who recommends gastric surgery when your not really even 100 lbs overweight is a quack.

    OH YEAH I WENT THERE.
  • mkbledsoe
    mkbledsoe Posts: 132
    I was having the same problem. Exercising like a maniac and not losing weight, until I started tracking every single morsel of food that I put in my mouth. That is when I started seeing changes. I am a glutton, so even when I thought I was eating pretty good, I was still eating way too much. I think I will have to track what I eat for the rest of my life, even if I get down to my goal weight. I am not saying that the lap band won't help you. Just don't give up. Keep up the exercise and maybe talk to a nutritionist. I talked to one where I work and it helped a lot. Opened my eyes to some new ideas. Even when the scale doesn't show it, the exercise is making you healthier and stronger. For me the exercise is the easy part. Learning to eat properly is something I will have to work on for the rest of my life. If you are tired of having to start over, then stop giving up. Someone posted that on my facebook and it made so much sense. It has been my mantra since. Good luck.
  • Mgregory723
    Mgregory723 Posts: 529 Member
    Today I went to the dr b/c I have been having such a hard time...she recommends that I consult a dr about a lap-band....:cry: Apparently I am so big that I have no hope of dropping of the weight. I'm sure she thinks I am crazy- I broke down and cried in her office. :embarassed:

    :mad: Worst Doctor FAIL ever! :grumble: She clearly has no clue. My doctor refuses to let me get this surgery and I am glad, I need to learn to do this on my own if I want to change the way I think of food. BTW, it is working. Down 14 lbs already only 160 more to go.

    YOU CAN DO THIS!!!
  • LynC33
    LynC33 Posts: 196
    Your Doc sounds like an idiot encouraging you to go for a quick fix rather than wanting you to learn the proper tools to take you through a healthy lifestyle. Make sure you are eating at least 6-8 meals a day I have 3 small meals and around 3 or 4 snacks a day and eat every 2.5 -3 hrs. Make sure its a healthy balance of protein (moreso) and complex carbs, high in fibre. (not simple carbs). I agree with some of the others in that you should cut back your exercise. Maybe to 4 or 5 days a week. If you keep going at it the way you have you will burn out or injure yourself. Best of luck with your journey. Head up, stay positive because you CAN do it!!
  • norabeth
    norabeth Posts: 176 Member
    I agree. Find a new doctor who supports you losing weight a healthy natural way. Surgery should only be used in extreme cases. I have a friend that did the lap band and has lost some weight, however her lifestyle is still the same. She doesn't monitor her portions, fats, alcohol ect. She only lost about 50 lbs of the 200+ she needs to lose. She also never works out and is a heavy smoker.
    Off my rant.

    Let your body have 1-2 full rest days. Stop just focusing on the scale. Take your measurements and BMI too.

    Good luck. Feel free to add me. :happy:
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