Women dating younger men

It is interesting how in society, women dating younger seems to be more scrutinized than men dating younger.

I myself am 20 years younger than my boyfriend. He's in his 40s and I'm in my 20s...and people may say, "Wow, what do you have in common?!" but I couldn't be happier. He's become my best friend, and has really shown me how to live life I've dated guys my own age, but there's just something special about him We're at 3 years strong, and I see us continuing on for many, many more!

I think this all goes to the fundamental biological urge to procreate that tends to invade our modern lives. A younger woman can have babies with an older man, but an older woman will have a much more difficult time having babies, so biologically-speaking it doesn't make sense for an older woman to be with a younger man.

But outside of that, if both people are over 18 and OK with the relationship, do what makes you happy.

That's a very good point. It depends on what his wants are as far as children.

My husband's ex was much older than him and he ended the relationship (mainly because she was bat **** crazy) but also because she had teenage children so he knew he would never have his own kids if he stayed with her.

We met and there is 6 years difference between us but here we are 1 kid later and trying for baby #2. So it really does come down to the individual and what their future wants are.:flowerforyou:

I, personally, think it's disgusting, but that's just my opinion. You should do whatever will make you happy.

The only question I would have is this (and one of my main reasons for feeling the way I do)... what happens when this 24 year old boy decides he wants to have BIOLOGICAL children and because you're past your child bearing years you are unable to fulfill that?

WOW - disgusting? That is a pretty strong opinion.

I agree that having children is an issue that should be discussed early in the relationship. Although, I was only 29 when I met my husband, I was unable to have anymore children without having a surgery. This fact really concerend me and I offered to have the surgery so I could conceive but my husband assured me that he didn't want any children of his own and it never become an issue. He is happy in hisr ole of step-dad to my kids.
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It is a strong opinion... "cougars" in the true sense of the word creep me out. I'm talking like 15-20 years in age difference and the woman being at least 40. I'm not saying a few years difference is a bad thing... and remember it's just my opinion and my own personal preference. I'm not judging anyone who wants that... it's simply not for me. I think it's far more insignificant say if the people involved are older (late 30s... 40s... even 50s) and both have a significant amount of life experience.

My fella is mentally 12 does this count?

I don't think age should matter

Little back story first: my ex-husband who is my age, 40, is getting remarried. His fiancee is 23 years old. I admit it bugged me at first, but what he does in his personal life is none of my concern, so I have moved past that. I just want her to be good to my children.

But it got me thinking that when a man dates a much younger woman, it usually isn't considered a big deal as long as she's legal. But when a woman dates a younger man, she's a cougar, milf, or whatever unflattering name she is called.

Ironically, there is a man who is 16 years my junior that I am attracted to, but I haven't acted on those feelings because of the age difference. Am I making a mistake here?

So what is your opinion of women dating younger men or men dating older women? Any experiences or advice you would like to share? :flowerforyou:

I, personally, think it's disgusting, but that's just my opinion. You should do whatever will make you happy.

The only question I would have is this (and one of my main reasons for feeling the way I do)... what happens when this 24 year old boy decides he wants to have BIOLOGICAL children and because you're past your child bearing years you are unable to fulfill that?

Because EVERYONE wants to have children of course..............

I didn't say everyone does... it was a "what if" kind of thing. I understand not EVERYONE needs or wants to have children. I get that. But if you're 24 and she's 40 he doesn't even get a fighting chance (at least not without serious risks)

I actually have a friend who married a woman 15 years older than him (I think its about 15 years, I'm not 100% but atleast 11 years older). He did want kids of his own. Both her kids from a previous marriage were 18 +. She had her tubes tied after the last. They talked about having it reversed to try for their own but in the end decided to adopt. They couldn't be happier and I am completely happy for them. I don't think the biological aspect was as important to him as wanting to have a family with the woman he loved .

My situation is reversed I'm 24 years old and my husband is 57 years old. Marrying him was the best decision I ever made. We have so much in common have so much fun together and age is not an issue in the slightest. We don't even think about it.

Before I met my husband I dated older men in general because their maturity appealed to me. Once dated someone a year younger and he put me off dating younger men completely lol. But luckily if that hadn't gone tits up (pardon the language lol) I would never have met my husband :happy: he's the best thing ever

THIS!!!!!
And I usually get the most dirty looks from women his age, which incidentally happen to have a man my age in tow...so its like ok lady, why give me the hairy eyeball when you're with a man my age?? This happened when we were out to dinner one day.

There's just something awesome about their stability and the fact that they know what they want and don't have to prove anything anymore.

I don't think age should matter if the maturity level is there, and you guys have a connection. I'm 13 years younger than my hunni and we have a wonderful relationship. I know that's different because he's the older one, but it shouldn't be. Who cares what anyone thinks? All that matters is what you think and that you're happy.

X2

Little back story first: my ex-husband who is my age, 40, is getting remarried. His fiancee is 23 years old. I admit it bugged me at first, but what he does in his personal life is none of my concern, so I have moved past that. I just want her to be good to my children.

But it got me thinking that when a man dates a much younger woman, it usually isn't considered a big deal as long as she's legal. But when a woman dates a younger man, she's a cougar, milf, or whatever unflattering name she is called.

Ironically, there is a man who is 16 years my junior that I am attracted to, but I haven't acted on those feelings because of the age difference. Am I making a mistake here?

So what is your opinion of women dating younger men or men dating older women? Any experiences or advice you would like to share? :flowerforyou:

I, personally, think it's disgusting, but that's just my opinion. You should do whatever will make you happy.

The only question I would have is this (and one of my main reasons for feeling the way I do)... what happens when this 24 year old boy decides he wants to have BIOLOGICAL children and because you're past your child bearing years you are unable to fulfill that?

Because EVERYONE wants to have children of course..............

I didn't say everyone does... it was a "what if" kind of thing. I understand not EVERYONE needs or wants to have children. I get that. But if you're 24 and she's 40 he doesn't even get a fighting chance (at least not without serious risks)

But I'd like to think before entering a serious relationship with someone you'd discuss the idea of children/marriage/religion all the big stuff, if it is SUCH a stumbling block you wouldn't get involved further/stay together. I have friends of varying ages who do not want to have children, if that is the case you find a partner with similar iedas. Or you adopt, or foster, or try IVF or surroagacy.

Age is a state of mind. If you do this because of a geniune attraction and not to "get even", you have Uncle Tom's blessing my child.

Tom


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Thank you Tom. It is definitely a genuine attraction. It never even occurred to me to date him to get even with my ex. All of that drama between my ex and I has been over with for years. Been divorced for almost 6 years now. :drinker:
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Your life, your business! All the best to you sweetie.

I was with a man 5 years younger than me for 5 years. We had a great relationship and the sex was great!! (TMI, sorry!!)

I say go for it! And JMO, a 40 year old man who would be with a 23 year old obviously doesn't think he can impress a woman who is a bit more worldly and well rounded. It could also show that he has a controlling personality and knows he can't control a peer. And finally, it's creepy. LOL! JMO, hope I didn't hurt any feelings.

Ha! Love this answer, I agree - Nothing wrong with it as far as I can see, I'd be thrilled if there was a man 16 yrs my junior was interested in me (except I'm married so it would only be an ego boost). Go for it

After 21, age is just a number

One of my very best friends from high school is getting married this weekend to a guy that's 21. She is 38, same as me. They get along as good as anyone I know that has a healthy and happy relationship. It is HARD to find that special someone in life...I wouldn't let age stand in my way.

My boyfriend is slightly over a year younger, which probably isn't that big of a deal to most people here. But there was a time in my life when I thought I'd never date anyone younger than I am. I always thought I was too serious to be able to deal with what I presumed would be a lack of maturity with a younger guy. Now that I'm nearly 30, though, I appreciate brief interludes of immaturity and inappropriateness. It reminds me that life is more fun when you allow yourself to laugh about something silly with a person you care about.

As long as he is responsible (i.e. he has a job, he can pay his bills, and he can take care of himself), your personalities mesh, and the two of you are on the same page as far as what you want out of life (marriage, kids, careers, etc.), I don't think age should be a dealbreaker.

I would not date a much younger man because I have a 21 year old daughter. That would be kind of awkward for her because they would be too close in age.

As a guy, I would say it really comes down more to what you two share feelings wise and what you are looking for out of it. There is no reason to limit yourself because of an arbitrary number that you think society may or may not find acceptable. If you two date and are happy, more power to you, end of story. Don't get caught up on if 4 years or 6 years or whatever is too much, just live life to the fullest that you can.

100% this! Who cares how many years difference you are as long as you are happy. There is nothing wrong, creepy, weird, etc about a relationship where the age is questioned by others ... who cares about the others as long as he makes you happy and you make him happy (and that goes for your ex as well).

There is so much in life that can bring you down, so many people in the world that want to cause you pain ... being with someone who brings you happiness and joy shouldn't be looked down upon just because they are X-number of years older or younger than you. If there is a connection, what does it hurt to check it out? And maturity is relative to the relationship & each individual, not the number in their age. :laugh:

My boyfriend is 11 years younger than me. I'm 53 and he is 42. What do we have in common?!?!? We are both mature, responsible grown adults!!!!!! Neither one of us likes the party atmosphere, we are both really active, we like the same kind of movies, we love to travel and go sight seeing, we're foodies and enjoy good restaurants, we love good conversation and a glass of wine or a good martini, we actually grew up in the same town just block apart from each other and went to the same High School (11 years apart fro one another lol), and although we are both very family orientated we now live a 'no kids lifestyle'.....my kids are successful grown and out of the house and at his age he is not interested in starting a family. Someday will get to share in the joy of having grandkids together!

So I think if the maturity level of each person is on the same wave length a relationship with a big age difference will work!!!