Do you believe in love at first sight?

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Replies

  • MsTanya77
    MsTanya77 Posts: 357 Member
    YES I most definetly believe in love at first sight.
  • 1_Happy_Camper
    1_Happy_Camper Posts: 63 Member
    I belive in Love at first Encounter. Not just seeing someone from a distance. But I do believe you can meet someone and spend a little time and just know you were meant to be together. There is that instant familiarity and comfort level like you've known each other in the past. Few ever find it but I chose to believe it exists.
  • jhigg11
    jhigg11 Posts: 121 Member
    I don't believe you can truly love someone until you have seen them at their worst, and still love & accept them for all their faults.
  • YaBoiMUGS
    YaBoiMUGS Posts: 237
    Yes, I fell in love with my son the moment I laid eyes on him.
  • aproc
    aproc Posts: 1,033 Member
    :laugh: Going to have to agree with the 'lust at first site' as far as all I believe in.

    I don't believe in love at first site because you can't have that connection with them. I definitely felt something for the guy I'm dating months before we started really talking in the gym and started to date. Haha, so that was definitely lust at first site I'm ashamed to admit. :love:
  • Erisad
    Erisad Posts: 1,580
    No. Infatuation at first sight, yes. It can lead to love but most often it just leads to disappointment. I have a good man now but we'll see how long it takes for him to get bored of me like the others. *sigh*

    Isn't that a bit of a defeatist, self fulfilling prophecy type attitude? If he is a good guy... You shouldn't expect him to leave. Then you have no one to blame but yourself when he does.

    I'm just having an off day. Also, short marriages and bad relationships run in the family it seems. And I've tried being positive in previous relationships and it's just lead to me getting really hurt by *kitten*. Sooo I always have the "worst case" scenario in my head so I'm not surprised when it eventually happens. Happily ever afters are for Disney Princesses. Girls like me fall in love, get married and then are left to leave the children alone, just like my mother was. I can hope for sometime better but the odds aren't in my favor with a 50% divorce rate in the united states.


    You get the love you think you deserve.

    Well I don't deserve him at all. He's too good for me, I wonder when he'll realize this and get a girl in his league? Maybe if I lost enough weight, I'd gain more confidence and then become worthy of his attention and love.
  • vingogly
    vingogly Posts: 1,785 Member
    I suggest you read Harville Hendrix's "Keeping the Love You Find: A Guide for Singles". What you're talking about is infatuation, not love ... love is a process of growth, not an instantaneous desire to be with another person based on external characteristics. Enjoy this infatuation while you can, because for most relationships, it won't last and without something behind the relationship other than the infatuation, neither will the relationship ... though it can be the first step toward genuine love (Hendrix would say, it's what initially gets us interested in the potential for relationship with someone else). See this description of Hendrix's concept of the Imago and how it factors into infatuation:

    http://micheleomaracom.hypermart.net/test/services/imago-therapy

    The mythology behind the concepts of love at first sight and the soulmate was born in the middle ages, and lives on today: the notion that there's that one person out there for each of us, and if we don't find that person, our relationship will not be everything it could be. That's led to the pattern: get infatuated, become an item, get married, lose the infatuation, label the marriage a failure, go searching for your next infatuation "high". It's no wonder that the divorce rate is so high in the USA. If we all got over the notions of love at first site and soulmates, we'd all have a much better chance of working at relationships that will last.

    Anyone who's done work with couples in trouble will tell you: a relationship needs work, it's not something "magical". And it will continue to be something both partners need to work at, for the duration of the relationship. You may be swept away by the initial tide of emotions, but you need to ask yourself: what will I do when the tide goes out?
  • KellyKAG
    KellyKAG Posts: 418
    Nope. I believe in lust at first sight (which is fun) but you can't love someone without knowing them.

    So how does a mother love her unborn child that she's never met?


    Very different! Unless you have actually felt a child growing and moving inside of you you can't explain that feeling. Nothing like meeting a guy. Not. Even. Close.

    I believe the initial lust is the reason that you keep going back and learn about someone and maybe grow to love them.
  • tinksmommy2006
    tinksmommy2006 Posts: 575
    Wow after reading some of the answers from people, and the explanations...there are some terribly hurt and scorn people...grow...learn that not everything/one is the same! Don't close yourself because of some *kitten* or B!tch hurt you! Flowers for all!!!:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • Cindy311
    Cindy311 Posts: 780 Member
    Lust at first sight, absolutely. Love at first sight, not likely. However, lust can lead to love! :laugh:
  • MindyBlack
    MindyBlack Posts: 954 Member
    Depends. Are we talking human love or chocolate love?
  • Cindylou321
    Cindylou321 Posts: 66
    yes I do... I've done it.. twice.. my late husband and I saw each other and fell in love that very second.. the second time not so lucky.. I fell in love but he didn't...
  • galegetsthin
    galegetsthin Posts: 1,340 Member
    I don't believe you can truly love someone until you have seen them at their worst, and still love & accept them for all their faults.

    ^ this. Exactly this. Everyone has flaws. When you are willing to have all of them, to possibly alter your whole life for a person, then it is love. Not until you would rather live in their world with them than in your own without them, can you really KNOW love. To know that a person has some flaws that perhaps you hate, and understand that they are their flaws, and they may never change, and you see so much "good" that the "bad" no longer matters, is to love them. To see a person for who they truly are, knowing that the road may be rough, and long and full of potholes, and still want to hold hands and start down that road together, is what 'love" is to me.
  • snoopytwins
    snoopytwins Posts: 1,759 Member
    Nope. I believe in lust at first sight (which is fun) but you can't love someone without knowing them.

    So how does a mother love her unborn child that she's never met?
    Because I loved, wanted, and cared for my children before I ever met or saw them...that's completely different.
  • Rjdj3530
    Rjdj3530 Posts: 154
    My husband says yes. I am more of the lust at first sight. :blushing:
  • snoopytwins
    snoopytwins Posts: 1,759 Member
    all i know is it didn't happen for me. I'm sure others feel differently, and that's cool. I don't think you believe in it, unless you have experienced it.

    That said - I had met and hung out with the woman who would become my wife a few times, but I do remember exactly how she looked, what she was wearing, where she was sitting, how she was sitting and the sunlight on her face the moment I realized that I did love her.
    This was beautiful!
  • Tourney3p0
    Tourney3p0 Posts: 290 Member
    Well I don't deserve him at all. He's too good for me, I wonder when he'll realize this and get a girl in his league? Maybe if I lost enough weight, I'd gain more confidence and then become worthy of his attention and love.

    When guys read stuff like this, they don't say, "Aww.. that's not true. Here's a list of 10 reasons why you're awesome." They think something much closer to the opposite end of the spectrum. Definite self-fulfilling prophecy.
  • tomomatic
    tomomatic Posts: 1,794 Member
    I believe in lust at first sight.

    I'd like to think that love is more about a growing fondness that's transcends past what you see and develops into a longing to be together to overcome all obstacles and build a future.

    To each his/her own and I'm sure everyone will have their own opinion.
  • Gilbrod
    Gilbrod Posts: 1,216 Member
    No. It took me two years before I fell in love with my wife. 10 years later, it's only grown stronger. But it wasn't at first.
  • HazelElfwand
    HazelElfwand Posts: 83
    Well When I met my late wife Zena, it was the end of the Night at a club in Norwich England, I knew by the end of those three dances I wanted her to be my wife, so I did something I never used to do and I asked her for her phone number, she then did something she never used to do and gave it to me. Not sure its first site but took about 20 mins. We were married 23 years 10 months and 9 days when god called her home.

    this made me teary :( I'm so sorry for your loss.
  • Erisad
    Erisad Posts: 1,580
    Wow after reading some of the answers from people, and the explanations...there are some terribly hurt and scorn people...grow...learn that not everything/one is the same! Don't close yourself because of some *kitten* or B!tch hurt you! Flowers for all!!!:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

    Lol thanks. *takes flower* I'm just rattled from a really bad dream I had last night and my brain keeps going back to it, oddly enough it's related to this topic. >.<
  • Gunnarbear
    Gunnarbear Posts: 186
    I don't believe you can truly love someone until you have seen them at their worst, and still love & accept them for all their faults.

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    Really smart woman said this ...
  • HazelElfwand
    HazelElfwand Posts: 83
    No. Infatuation at first sight, yes. It can lead to love but most often it just leads to disappointment. I have a good man now but we'll see how long it takes for him to get bored of me like the others. *sigh*

    Isn't that a bit of a defeatist, self fulfilling prophecy type attitude? If he is a good guy... You shouldn't expect him to leave. Then you have no one to blame but yourself when he does.

    ^this
  • jcstanton
    jcstanton Posts: 1,849 Member
    I believe in physical chemistry at first sight, but that initial attraction often fades as you get to know someone and discover that you don't really agree on much of anything. On the other hand, you might not be attracted to someone at all when you first meet them, but after you get to know them, an attraction develops. Real, lasting love is something that's developed over time through shared experiences, struggles, etc..., and it's a daily choice to stick by your SO no matter what. It's not something that happens instantly....IMO.
  • Erisad
    Erisad Posts: 1,580
    Well I don't deserve him at all. He's too good for me, I wonder when he'll realize this and get a girl in his league? Maybe if I lost enough weight, I'd gain more confidence and then become worthy of his attention and love.

    When guys read stuff like this, they don't say, "Aww.. that's not true. Here's a list of 10 reasons why you're awesome." They think something much closer to the opposite end of the spectrum. Definite self-fulfilling prophecy.

    *sigh* I guess you're right. Nevermind.
  • hiker282
    hiker282 Posts: 983 Member
    Nope. I believe in lust at first sight (which is fun) but you can't love someone without knowing them.

    So how does a mother love her unborn child that she's never met?

    To be perfectly honest. I didn't. I DO love my child, but before I met her it was not a love. It was a responsibility to keep this person safe. It was a fear that I would screw her up. It was PART of me. I wanted to take care of her, but I didn't love her yet. I had love FOR her, what she meant, what she represented, but not her as a person yet. That came later. Once she began developing personality. Love is not a word I take lightly. I have only ever "loved" one man, my grandparents and my parents, and now, my daughter.

    I think this complicates what love is more than it needs to be. What is love but to care for someone, to want to see them safe, to want to see them happy and to be willing to make the sacrifices that makes the other person's life better?

    I've experienced plenty of love in my life in what I've given and received. There are different kinds of love, I'll admit that. I don't love my guy friends the same way as the girls I've dated. I love my parents and my other family members in their own way. But it all comes down to the same thing as before: Caring, doing what you can to keep them safe and make them happy, making sacrifices on their behalf.
  • JonathonMars
    JonathonMars Posts: 358 Member
    Wow after reading some of the answers from people, and the explanations...there are some terribly hurt and scorn people...grow...learn that not everything/one is the same! Don't close yourself because of some *kitten* or B!tch hurt you! Flowers for all!!!:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

    Eh, sometimes you have to be mature enough to realize you are the problem.
  • HazelElfwand
    HazelElfwand Posts: 83
    Absolutely - and I'm about to marry him in a couple months!!!!
  • ESVABelle
    ESVABelle Posts: 1,264 Member
    I used to, then I got married :laugh:

    Haha. This.
  • JenMull44
    JenMull44 Posts: 226 Member
    I believe in lust at first sight

    DITTO !!!
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