When You Cry... They Win. Stop.

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  • foxyforce
    foxyforce Posts: 3,078 Member
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    i like you're competitive spirit.
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
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    i like you're competitive spirit.

    Them's fightin' words. (Puns rule)
  • bekihughes
    bekihughes Posts: 59
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    Thank you! This can be me sometimes! Going to write this and put it on my fridge so it stares me in the face!
  • angryguy77
    angryguy77 Posts: 836 Member
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    Ok, tough-love time...

    I've seen string-after-string of "whining" and "crying" about the things other people say.

    Examples:
    - "They insulted me."
    - "They hurt my feelings."
    - "They made me sad."

    Here's a few steps to help some of you guys with the crushing things other people say...

    Step 1: Stop giving a *kitten* what other people think.
    Step 2: Repeat Step 1.

    Now I have no doubt, a handful of people will be morally outraged by what I just typed.
    Please reference Steps 1 through 2.

    (I'm sure a few of you have seen me post that on other strings)

    When you get "offended," "hurt," "insulted" and "morally outraged," you've already lost the battle, because you granted the other party all the power before you even got started. When you run to your blog or forum to e-whine about how "that big mean person made you saddy-sad," they win. And you helped them to do it.


    - When you cry, they win.
    - When you're "emotionally devastated," you give them all the power.
    - When you're the "victim," you make them the "victor."

    Don't let them win.

    Yeah, but when you insinuate I'm like a 14 year old girl, a starving child in Africa dies.
  • tlamarch
    tlamarch Posts: 105
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    Ok, tough-love time...

    I've seen string-after-string of "whining" and "crying" about the things other people say.

    Examples:
    - "They insulted me."
    - "They hurt my feelings."
    - "They made me sad."

    Here's a few steps to help some of you guys with the crushing things other people say...

    Step 1: Stop giving a *kitten* what other people think.
    Step 2: Repeat Step 1.

    Now I have no doubt, a handful of people will be morally outraged by what I just typed.
    Please reference Steps 1 through 2.

    (I'm sure a few of you have seen me post that on other strings)

    When you get "offended," "hurt," "insulted" and "morally outraged," you've already lost the battle, because you granted the other party all the power before you even got started. When you run to your blog or forum to e-whine about how "that big mean person made you saddy-sad," they win. And you helped them to do it.


    - When you cry, they win.
    - When you're "emotionally devastated," you give them all the power.
    - When you're the "victim," you make them the "victor."

    Don't let them win.

    Amen, I love this post
  • bikinibeliever
    bikinibeliever Posts: 832 Member
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    Can I box you up and send you to a friend of mine???? :flowerforyou:
  • amykins68
    amykins68 Posts: 30 Member
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    This is fantastic! Thanks so much!
  • MustangCindy67
    MustangCindy67 Posts: 91 Member
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    yup that is about all of of it.....thanks for the reminder.....I should put this on a memo and post in my car before I go to work some days..... on my days off I dont give a flying frig...like today haha..... again thnx...
  • CajunNino
    CajunNino Posts: 269
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    I agree with the original post. If everyone could have self-confidence that would be great. But some do not and I think it runs deeper than weight issues. I never cared what "society" thought about me, even at my heaviest. I think you have to have a bit of self-righteousness in you to truly not care about what is said. I do, and I'm fine with that.

    It's very easy to not care about what "people" think if you don't love them. That is the key. If you don't care what ANYBODY thinks then you can't possibly love and respect someone. You CARE about what the people you love and respect think of you - it's human nature and y'all are not all narcissistic. But of course, we are all making blanket statements about people and society in general. Yeah, who cares what THEY think?
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
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    I agree with the original post. If everyone could have self-confidence that would be great. But some do not and I think it runs deeper than weight issues. I never cared what "society" thought about me, even at my heaviest. I think you have to have a bit of self-righteousness in you to truly not care about what is said. I do, and I'm fine with that.

    It's very easy to not care about what "people" think if you don't love them. That is the key. If you don't care what ANYBODY thinks then you can't possibly love and respect someone. You CARE about what the people you love and respect think of you - it's human nature and y'all are not all narcissistic. But of course, we are all making blanket statements about people and society in general. Yeah, who cares what THEY think?

    Not true. I love my wife more than anything in the world, literally. However, she thinks I should put the toilet seat down. I'm yet to really care. ;)
  • CajunNino
    CajunNino Posts: 269
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    I agree with the original post. If everyone could have self-confidence that would be great. But some do not and I think it runs deeper than weight issues. I never cared what "society" thought about me, even at my heaviest. I think you have to have a bit of self-righteousness in you to truly not care about what is said. I do, and I'm fine with that.

    It's very easy to not care about what "people" think if you don't love them. That is the key. If you don't care what ANYBODY thinks then you can't possibly love and respect someone. You CARE about what the people you love and respect think of you - it's human nature and y'all are not all narcissistic. But of course, we are all making blanket statements about people and society in general. Yeah, who cares what THEY think?

    Not true. I love my wife more than anything in the world, literally. However, she thinks I should put the toilet seat down. I'm yet to really care. ;)
    Haha.. apple and oranges. Putting the toilet seat down is not a personal thought towards you.
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
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    I agree with the original post. If everyone could have self-confidence that would be great. But some do not and I think it runs deeper than weight issues. I never cared what "society" thought about me, even at my heaviest. I think you have to have a bit of self-righteousness in you to truly not care about what is said. I do, and I'm fine with that.

    It's very easy to not care about what "people" think if you don't love them. That is the key. If you don't care what ANYBODY thinks then you can't possibly love and respect someone. You CARE about what the people you love and respect think of you - it's human nature and y'all are not all narcissistic. But of course, we are all making blanket statements about people and society in general. Yeah, who cares what THEY think?

    Not true. I love my wife more than anything in the world, literally. However, she thinks I should put the toilet seat down. I'm yet to really care. ;)
    Haha.. apple and oranges. Putting the toilet seat down is not a personal thought towards you.

    Ask her. She takes it VERY personally. Trust me.
  • lizzybethclaire
    lizzybethclaire Posts: 849 Member
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    It's a waste of energy. When people are nasty to you it does hurt. I used to walk away. Now I make myself, even if I am hurting inside, take those people to task. It is not better to walk away because that five minutes of talking to them usually ends up with them apologizing or being a coward and saying that I misunderstood them. Sometimes I have been mistaken and have ended up apologizing. Plus, I am always super nice to them and it usually ends up making them feel like *kitten*. Does it change the world or change the people? Absolutely not. But knowing that I stood up for myself makes me feel better and that is what counts.
  • onedayillbeamilf
    onedayillbeamilf Posts: 966 Member
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    They don't know.....do they still win if they don't know? Does winning even matter if you don't know you won?
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
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    They don't know.....do they still win if they don't know? Does winning even matter if you don't know you won?

    Yes. Always.
  • garnetsms
    garnetsms Posts: 10,018 Member
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    I agree with the original post. If everyone could have self-confidence that would be great. But some do not and I think it runs deeper than weight issues. I never cared what "society" thought about me, even at my heaviest. I think you have to have a bit of self-righteousness in you to truly not care about what is said. I do, and I'm fine with that.

    It's very easy to not care about what "people" think if you don't love them. That is the key. If you don't care what ANYBODY thinks then you can't possibly love and respect someone. You CARE about what the people you love and respect think of you - it's human nature and y'all are not all narcissistic. But of course, we are all making blanket statements about people and society in general. Yeah, who cares what THEY think?

    Not true. I love my wife more than anything in the world, literally. However, she thinks I should put the toilet seat down. I'm yet to really care. ;)
    Haha.. apple and oranges. Putting the toilet seat down is not a personal thought towards you.

    Ask her. She takes it VERY personally. Trust me.

    Every woman in the world needs to realize...It takes less energy to do it yourself than it does to locate said man, and fuss about it. I am surrounded by the male species (2 boys, 1 man) in my house, so its just easier to do it myself. NOW, if one of you can tell me what is up with the aim, I would gladly like to hear some suggestions on that...
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,024 Member
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    I have been made fun of more times than I can count. But you know what...

    FLUCK THEM!

    I'm putting in the effort now and when it finally pays off I will get to say...

    FLUCK YOU!

    And it will be glorious.
  • boldtsmith
    boldtsmith Posts: 120 Member
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    "Every woman in the world needs to realize...It takes less energy to do it yourself than it does to locate said man, and fuss about it. I am surrounded by the male species (2 boys, 1 man) in my house, so its just easier to do it myself. NOW, if one of you can tell me what is up with the aim, I would gladly like to hear some suggestions on that..."
    [/quote]
    We're supposed to aim...crap :blushing:
  • gchutson
    gchutson Posts: 657
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    I have been made fun of more times than I can count. But you know what...

    FLUCK THEM!

    I'm putting in the effort now and when it finally pays off I will get to say...

    FLUCK YOU!

    And it will be glorious.

    That was flucking awesome.
  • boldtsmith
    boldtsmith Posts: 120 Member
    Options
    I have been made fun of more times than I can count. But you know what...

    FLUCK THEM!

    I'm putting in the effort now and when it finally pays off I will get to say...

    FLUCK YOU!

    And it will be glorious.
    Yes! We should all be like bonobos...all they do is fluck.

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