Things you shouldn't say to someone "on a diet?"

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  • hkevans724
    hkevans724 Posts: 241 Member
    I went for lunch with a friend in another town. We ended up at Boston Pizza. I had water and ordered the salmon fillet with steamed veggies (it was good). When we ordered she said "oh I'm not on the wagon so I will order whatever I want". She ordered some pasta dish. At the end of lunch she looked at my daughter and said "I'm not on the wagon so I think I will order cheesecake and eat it in front of your mom". Now I don't care what she eats it just seemed like she was trying to set me up to fail. I proved her wrong because I ate my lunch, drank my water, and enjoyed it all.


    Thank goodness she lives out of town!! Maybe you need a nicer friend!
  • tlc12078
    tlc12078 Posts: 334 Member
    I can't relate.
    Nobody knows I am on a diet.
    I eat more than most at every function, party or picnic and am usually on "free day". While the fat people are all crying the blues about their "diets", I am wallowing in a food orgy of fun and fabulous dishes.
    What diet?
    The one thing people do say more often than anything is "how do you eat so much and stay in such good shape?"
    If I thought they really wanted to know, I'd tell them, but I do not.
    I just shrug and play dumb, knowing none of these people would be willing to travel down my road to peak fitness.
    It's a lonely but lovely place.
    ALL IS POSSIBLE!


    You know I have a lost a good portion and I eat and I do cheat here n there all do to the fabulous invention called exercise and I try to burn to earn my food. Exercise is the key, not just a little here n a little there I mean doing more than expected. Thats how its working for me. IT hurts like hell but its worth it. :)
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    "are you doing it the right way" as if everyone that looses weight has an eating disorder... i haven't seen you in 8 months and im 40lbs lighter someone should get me help (ugh)

    You should reply "Yes, the weight is coming off, so I think I'm doing it the right way." UGH!!!
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    The worst one I got recently went something like this- I love Skinny Cow Ice cream, and at 100 calories, I fit it in any days I work real hard. It's a great, guilt free treat.
    Last week, as I was enjoying my treat, an old co-worker of my husbands stopped by. My husband is very proud of me for exercising and losing weight, so of course, he knew I was "dieting"

    Him: I thought you were dieting, whats up with the Ice Cream?
    Me: (nicely) It's a treat, and its Skinny Cow, it's..
    Him: (interrupting me) It's ice cream, thats like the worst thing for you when you're dieting.
    Me: (I decided to just keep my mouth shut at this point, I wanted to say some things I really shouldn't)

    Him: (he launches into a story about how he "used to be" a weight lifter, so he knows a LOT about weight control)

    Me: (I didn't say anything, just looked at his 100+ pounds of overweight self in disbelief)

    Him: (the beautiful ending to his diatribe) He looked at me, very seriously, and said "My ex-wife used to try to lose weight by eating Ice Cream too, thats why I divorced her fat a****"

    Me: "I may have some weight to lose, but your kind of ugly is permanent. Now, get the ____ out of my house"

    My husband has been informed that this man better never walk in my door again.. if he does, my newest exercise will be batting practice!



    You shoulda kicked his *ss out the door....(literally!).....hey then you would have burned off the 100 cals and you could sit back and have another Skinny Cow......its a win-win...:drinker:


    lol this is too cute. I agree with her, that would of been brownie point for another ice cream n skinny cow is awesome.

    HOLY CRAP.... LOL
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    Last week was my 21st birthday and I was celebrating it with my fiance and his family. His mother is the nicest person I know and she knows I've been eating less and been on a "diet", so she asked me what kinda of cake i wanted for my birthday. I told her a mini one lol. So she did! It was only 6 inches in diameter and it was a pretty healthy cake, as far at they could go. There wasn't any frosting, just some light whipped cream and fresh cut up strawberries. I planned on sharing it at my birthday part with my fiance, who would eat half of it anyway. After I got my cake though my future sister-in-law said "Wow, a whole cake to yourself!?" Then make some pig noises afterward. That made me feel pretty bad after so I had a very small piece, maybe a slice that was 12% of the cake, if that. My fiance still had half of it.

    Needless to say, if it's someone's birthday or special occasion and they seem like they deserve a treat, don't make fun of them even if you're joking.It can really hurt someones feelings.

    What a ****! !

    DITTO!!!
  • hkevans724
    hkevans724 Posts: 241 Member
    I share an office with another girl, who is also over weight. She likes to go buy cupcakes once or twice a week or gourmet cookies and always buys me one, because "I don't want to eat it in front of you when you don't have one" Next time I will be taking advice from the brownie person who took one bite and threw it in the garbage. She knows that I am on a "diet" She supposedly is too. But she eats junk all the time and is trying to bring me down with her. I need to practice better self control. I have no problem with not eating what I can't see but when she brings cake in here and sets it on my desk and opens it up for me to see and smell I think about choking her and give in... Some people just don't get it.

    I also hate when people say : You aren't fat, you look great. Hello? I weigh 241lbs!! That's fat!!! I am classified as OBESE!! Yes I am 5'11" and yes I carry it well but yes I am indeed still FAT!!
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    Hi, would you like to buy a box of Girl Scout Cookies?

    haha. mmmm, girl scout cookiiiiieeeessss....


    Grrrrrrrrr, those little bi*^@es!! How dare they!! LOL
  • EmilyTwist1
    EmilyTwist1 Posts: 206 Member
    I have been underweight most of my life, and I joined MFP to help me gain a little weight (I'm now at my goal weight :) ), so I have a different perspective that most people here. That said, when a skinny person wants to gain weight, they can get the same kind of unhelpful, rude comments.

    Whenever I would mention that I wanted to gain weight, people would often say to me, "Just eat a bunch of ice cream/pizza/cookies/other junk food." No thanks. I want to gain AND be healthy.
  • emnk5308
    emnk5308 Posts: 736
    My husband, who is in the garage looking for a tool this idiot wanted to borrow, was really shocked at what this guy said, but even more shocked that I didn't hit him over the head with something.

    He's actually pretty lucky that my husband didn't understand what had happened until after he pulled away.. He was even more mad that I was. Seriously, I just thought the guy was terminally stupid.

    Aww Good Husband!! =) And good self control :indifferent:
  • bpetlock
    bpetlock Posts: 109
    I almost forgot about this but after my first pregnancy I was trying to lose weight and was watching my calories. My mother-in-law said to me "Don't you just want to be happy?" as if eating healthy didn't make me happy. I was like "Yes and that's why I'm trying to lose weight."
  • I've only been eating healthily and exercising for just over a month and I've had my mum stay over twice in that time. We sometimes get some shopping together and she will buy cakes and things. Get them out and offer me some and then retract it and say "ooh I'm sorry I forgot you're on a diet," the first few times I didn't mind but she keeps on doing it, like playing dumb about my dieting. One time she asked me if I wanted lemon merrange (sp?) pie and thank god I was like no I hate the stuff. But the way she does it like I have no self restraint, like I'm incapable of saying no to food. Which is funny because I don't even like deserts that much.

    Other times I see people raising their eyebrows or thinking just get on with it, if I measure or weigh out my food. Like I'm doing it just to be fussy.
  • Hope502012
    Hope502012 Posts: 98 Member
    I've always found over the years that I've been criticised for being "overweight" or too thin. Hopefully this time I'll get it right! The important thing is to be happy with yourself. I usually quote Thumper from Bambi "If you can't say nuttin' nice, don't say nuttin' at all".....:happy:
  • Hope502012
    Hope502012 Posts: 98 Member
    Ignore the people who think you are fussy. Who cares what they think. You will feel the benefits and be happy for it.:smile:
  • cps4646
    cps4646 Posts: 4 Member
    My favorite is when they say you can have 1 bite it won't kill you! Yes it might because I can't stop at 1 bite! Not supportive at all!
  • Briko3
    Briko3 Posts: 266 Member
    "One cupcake is not going to hurt you."

    I hear that and I think. NO. I don't WANT the darn cupcake! I'm trying to be good! lol.

    *empathizes with you*

    Haha...just tell them their cupcake looks like crap and you didn't want to hurt their feelings.
  • "One cupcake is not going to hurt you."

    I hear that and I think. NO. I don't WANT the darn cupcake! I'm trying to be good! lol.

    *empathizes with you*

    Haha...just tell them their cupcake looks like crap and you didn't want to hurt their feelings.

    Haha I was thinking the same thing.
  • LeeshaNichole
    LeeshaNichole Posts: 179 Member
    Also-I hate when people ask "how is the diet going?" or "is th diet working?" ugghhh! Ohh and also my mom always asks"why are you trying to loose weight?" Umm cause I'm FAT!!!!

    Meaning of the word diet according to dictionary.com:
    4. the foods eaten, as by a particular person or group: The native diet consists of fish and fruit.
    5. food or feed habitually eaten or provided: The rabbits were fed a diet of carrots and lettuce.

    So, yes you are on a diet. Just not one that lasts 4 months and after that you're back to your old ways. You're changing your unhealthy diet into a healthy one.

    ---
    I'm surprised by the hate everyone describes towards people who, in their own way, are trying to help. Be glad that you're mother is worried about your health. Both for not eating enough and eating too much. Be glad that people who have problems with dieting and still have weight issues find you important enough to give you some tips they've learned from experience. People might be trying to help you in way that doesn't work for you, but in almost all of these posts I hear someone trying to help.

    If you think about it you should be happy that people care enough to try and help you. But explain to them how they can help, or that you'd rather not discuss your diet with them.
    You are assuming these people are trying to be nice and help and also that my mom is worried about my health-this is not the case. The people were asking in a snide way cause they don't think I can do it-They are asking "how is the diet going?" In other words have you given up yet. And when they ask "is the diet working?" They look at me up and down, and basically saying-You still look fat. It is not in a caring way, it is rude and it hurts my feelings. Also, my mom could give a crap about me. And when she asks " why are you trying to lose weight?" It is always followed by is the doctor making you loose weight or is Josh (husband) cause she doesn't think I could possibly do it on my own. My mother wishes I was never born.

    Soo Please, please for the love of Pete DO NOT assume!! Also, remember that in my post (the part you did not include) I wrote I lost my baby-people could have a little more sympathy and support me instead of being rude and hurting my feeling-only after a month of losing my baby. Thank you!
  • burtonhl
    burtonhl Posts: 57
    I have a huge addiction to Pepsi and that is one thing that I am not ready to give up yet.

    As soon as people see me with a Pepsi, apparently they are entitled to tell me that it is full of sugar and all the damage it will do to me. No shi#$^ sherlock! If I could quit cold turkey I would, but I know it wouldn't last! Baby steps for me.
  • smeklc
    smeklc Posts: 94 Member
    bump for later
  • My ex-boyfriend was really hot, 6'2" with a great physique. My parents met him and my dad later asked me if I get jealous or paranoid of him with other girls since I was overweight. And then he said he wished I would lose my weight. That one hurt because it felt like he thought my boyfriend was out of my league.
  • manhn1
    manhn1 Posts: 137 Member
    I love the people who act like maintenance is harder than losing the weight in the first place. In the breakroom of my second job, some of us were talking about my weight loss (I had just run my first race - a 10K two days earlier) & a lady who's an attention *kitten* was saying that & I started laughing. She glared at me & I said that if maintaining your weight is harder than losing weight, than you're not doing it right.

    Well, I think maintenance *is* harder than losing the weight. Losing the weight you get the positive reinforcement via the lower number on the scale, the occasional compliment, or trying on smaller clothes. With maintenance, you get comments like "You're still on a diet" or "You're too skinny" or "Eat this--you don't need to diet anymore!"

    It's not like I can't understand why someone would think losing weight would be harder--since losing weight is hard. But it seems reasonable to hold either opinion.

    Friends have been basically fine. Work is harder--particularly my boss who is young and fit, and seems to always want to give me some chocolate bar or slice of pizza or can of pop.

    Family is tougher, I have one aunt who always seem in pain when she sees me. I know a lot of people think I'm skinny--they say it enough times in front of me. I'm "normal" in terms of my BMI. I wouldn't mind gaining more muscle, but I like how I currently look and I like cardio, so I'm in no huge rush.

    While I notice a lot of posters have negative reactions to people who have their own weight issues, I tend to be more irritable to "naturally skinny" people. I hate comments like "Why run in a stuffy gym when you can run outdoors in nature?" Uhm, because I hate bugs and I get bored watching grass. "You can eat everything you want, just in moderation." I cannot eat Oreos in moderation, so I'd rather not have one, thanks anyway. I just find it smug and annoying.
  • Karenzky
    Karenzky Posts: 34 Member
    i hate it when someone ask me,
    s:so are you still on a diet?
    me: yes
    s: is it working?so how much did you lose?
    me: 20lbs
    s: really?

    argh!
  • MaretL
    MaretL Posts: 50 Member
    "One cupcake is not going to hurt you."

    That's the one for me too! or "everyone HAS to have some sweet stuff sometimes" - Yes fine, only let ME decide when and what it is for me!!

    And the other attitude what really annoys me is when you tell someone that you're trying to lose weight and they ask how long have you done it and how much you've lost and then it turns into a big competition (you know, that big boasting style of tone) : "I was dieting last year and I lost 30 lbs with one month" - I'm glad for you but at the same time it is not a competition, I prefer losing it reasonably without starving myself and I HAVE time - for the rest of my life actually!!! :D
  • EmpathyBot
    EmpathyBot Posts: 78 Member
    Another one of my friends said to me "You don't need to run and workout to lose weight, just walk. Why do the extra work?"

    Meanwhile she keeps gaining, then losing, then gaining...
  • itgeekwoman
    itgeekwoman Posts: 804 Member
    One guys said to me today.. if you lose much more weight you'll be nothing.

    I'm 5'3" 177. I have more than a little to lose!
  • HollywoodDJ
    HollywoodDJ Posts: 296
    About a month or two into me being on MFP and losing weight my husband ....HUSBAND ...(who obviously thought he was entitled) said to me when I was eating supper - - (can't even remember what it was) said to me,"I THOUGHT YOU WERE WATCHING WHAT YOU ATE??????"


    and I said to him, "THAT'S RIGHT...I AM WATCHING WHAT I EAT...NOT YOU........ME....OK???"

    Haven't heard another word like that from him~ So there~

    This is also the same guy who in the first week or two was practically shoving ice cream and Swiss Rolls in my face and then turning them away from me and putting them in his mouth going..."YUMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmm"

    JERK!!!:explode:

    But .....this is also the same guy.....who after I lost my first 20 lbs got me a "CONGRATULATIONS" card and beautiful arrangements of flowers and told me he was so proud of me!~ So.....he wasn't supportive at first but he's come around and I have taught him not to be the food police now~ LOL!


    MEN....can't live with them, can't live without them~ =):drinker: hehehehe
  • LeslePG
    LeslePG Posts: 105 Member
    People who say "Why are you trying to lose weight? You look fine". Well, I still have about 10 pounds of baby weight I want to get rid of from 6 years ago! And what I really want to say is "Have you seen me naked? Not pretty right now but I'll show you if you think it's your business" :laugh:

    Luckily my husband and I are doing this together with MFP and training with C25K......however, his huge calorie allowance per day really annoys me~ lol!

    Glad we can all encourage each other- keep up the good work, everyone!

    My husband and I are doing this together too and he has a huge number of calories a day also! And he keeps dropping big numbers each week and while I am happy for him I keep teasing him that I am going to inject bacon fat into his celery. LOL and he says "Note to self, Don't eat the celery. GOt it !"
  • LeslePG
    LeslePG Posts: 105 Member
    So glad you're going thru what I am with your hubby~ he texts me every evening on the way home asking "Margaitas? Been a while..." I ge so mad at him and say "you may have the extra calories to drink but I don't! Thanks for being supportive!" And his big numbers.... I totally get that too! Hang in there, we'll be hotties before we know it!
  • Carolyn_79
    Carolyn_79 Posts: 935 Member
    I've only had a friend comment on my food choice once. She hasn't been very supportive of my weight loss so I think she's just dealing with her own issues.

    I tend to make a point of telling people who are interested that I've managed to lose my weight by not depriving myself of the foods I love. I just have them in moderation.
  • Krazy_Kat
    Krazy_Kat Posts: 212
    A few years ago I was trying to lose weight and my Mother knew it and she kept on offering me food from her purse.... Seriously, it was a larder in there. Granola bars, nuts, dried fruit, chocolate,yogurt balls, mint leaves,. I'd say no, I'm watching what I eat. She'd say it doesn't count because it's from her purse. :S It must me magical.