(some of the) American guys...

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  • DaughterOfTheMostHighKing
    DaughterOfTheMostHighKing Posts: 1,436 Member
    they're not all like that. I met a gentleman who was charming! he opened doors, led the way, paid for everything, and never laid a hand on me! I on the other hand, placed my hand on his thigh while he was driving, and rubbed my leg against his under the table at the library while he was reading out loud to my nephew. lol!!!! meeeeeoooooooww!!!!! ;D
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    I have never once had this problem, and I live (most of the time) in the US. You just met a guy who either can't admit he's on a budget, or is a jerk, or who is using it as an excuse. I think it's time to move on..
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    There is a huge difference between being cheap and having no class. A guy who complains about prices and how women don't have to pay simply has no class.

    Someone on a budget can be discrete about his finances and choose less expensive places to hang out. If you're a down-to-earth girl you might enjoy activities that don't require a lot of money. If you need to be treated lavishly then maybe the guy wasn't right for you. Many guys worry they are only being "used".

    Question to OP: how would you feel about a guy that was upfront and said he liked you but really couldn't afford to go to high-end restaurants/bars or buy you stuff?
    What he said.
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
    Never had that problem. If it's a boyfriend I've been with for a long time we'll have cheap dates sometimes. But before that, no
  • AmyFett
    AmyFett Posts: 1,607 Member
    You met a cheap guy. Not all guys are like that. Not all Americans are like that.

    This ^^

    Some guys are actually decent guys!! They might think that they hate spending the money, but it's rude to constantly ***** about it. A good guy knows the difference.
  • jaygregz
    jaygregz Posts: 104
    I always offer to pay. I also always tip her when she leaves.

    :)

    In all seriousness though I don't think I've ever been on a date that I haven't paid for. It's just the polite thing to do and I think that as long as the woman I date continue to be appreciative of that fact that I will continue doing it. The only real problem I see with the guy you are dating though is that he's complaining about it. Its not a necessity that he pays but if he does he sure shouldn't be complaining about it because that was his choice.

    I'd buy all the women here a round! The only complaining I would do is when your cup was empty :)
  • Natashaa1991
    Natashaa1991 Posts: 866 Member


    Question to OP: how would you feel about a guy that was upfront and said he liked you but really couldn't afford to go to high-end restaurants/bars or buy you stuff?

    well as I said, he was the one to suggest those places. Some people here are being really rude, saying that i expect to be treated like a princess (read the post first, that's all i can say)
    the thing is, i liked him so if he suggested going out for a walk or something like that i would still do it.
    the problem is not that the guy didn't pay for everything,it's just that he was whining all the time.
  • aproc
    aproc Posts: 1,033 Member
    Wow. So we are comparing all American guys to the few crappy ones you met? Very nice.

    Majority of my dates usually refuse to let me pay for things. Where are you meeting your guys at? :laugh:
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    the problem is not that the guy didn't pay for everything,it's just that he was whining all the time.
    Exactly. Who wants a whiner? If he can't afford these places, he needs to man up and say so, instead of suggesting them (presumably to impress you?). Either way, whining about it is so unattractive. Go find a grown-up man.
  • CuteAndCurvy83
    CuteAndCurvy83 Posts: 570 Member
    I was talking to a guy for about a year online before we finally decided to meet, when we did meet I wanted to me somewhere public and somewhere we could walk around and talk, so I choose the sponge docks in Tarpon Springs. As soon as he met me he started complaining about having to pay $2 for parking, I knew then and there it wasn't gonna work..
  • weevil66
    weevil66 Posts: 600 Member
    I am a Brit, I would defiantly take you out and act like a gent

    1.open doors
    2 pull out that chair
    3.make interesting conversation
    4 be devastatingly suave

    This is the nature of us.

    On the date

    a. i would never mention money and pay for everything
    b. never ask you to pay for anything

    What i would do is send you and invoice within the next 48 hours outlining your 50% expenditure so I can can then claim it as a business meeting and get my tax back.

    #truegent

    Bahahahahaha!!!!!
  • FitasBarbie
    FitasBarbie Posts: 141 Member
    DUMP HIM!!!
    :noway:
    What a miser - OUCH!
    Here's the rule of a true gentleman. If I invite you, I pay. FOR EVERYTHING!
    And we have a fabulous evening. And if I am not a man of great means, I plan things I can afford.
    Seriously, dump this guy NOW!
    Good Luck :flowerforyou:

    ^This
  • nammer79
    nammer79 Posts: 664 Member
    You met a cheap guy. Not all guys are like that. Not all Americans are like that.

    This ^^^ and as a guy if your really interested in someone the cost of the date wouldn't stop him from wanting to see you there are many things that don't cost much to do. He sounds like a prick but at the same time he might not like you as much as you think.
  • DataBased
    DataBased Posts: 513 Member
    You should try dating a Brit. I won't even pull your chair out for you without charging for it.
    Brilliant, Captain! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
  • bulbadoof
    bulbadoof Posts: 1,058 Member
    My boyfriend insists on paying for everything. It's funny, 'cause I make more than him and I usually make the plans. :laugh:
  • Erisad
    Erisad Posts: 1,580
    If he complains this much about money now, how would he be later down the line when you have bills, house payments and kids to pay for? He either has some major financial issues or is just cheap. In any event, doesn't look like he's ready for a relationship.
  • meka325
    meka325 Posts: 47
    okay...here's my rant on the subject... who cares if the guy pays or not? I make good money so I have no problem paying for myself or my guy. I didn't realize women in America spent years pushing for equality just so we can piss and moan about not being treated like a princess!

    I had a first date the other day - he told me point blank that he just bought a car the week before (which is true, it still has the temp. plates) and couldn't really afford anything fancy. So, he took me to an old-school drive in and then out to a part to watch fireworks.
    Did he pay? Yes.
    Did I also pull out my wallet? YES!
    Did he tell me to put it away? Also yes.
    Did I think he was a gentleman? Yes.
    Was it because he paid? HELL NO.
    It was because he opened the door for me, because he looked in my eyes when we talked, because he held my hand when I slipped on a grassy hill, and because unlike men in my past, when he said he'd call me the next day - HE DID.

    If as women we keep getting caught up in who pays the check - then maybe you should just stop dating!

    This. 1000x.
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