Family is trying to sabotage my 'diet'

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Replies

  • benich3043
    benich3043 Posts: 252 Member
    The only person that can sabotage your diet is you. That's like saying "I went to the grocery store today and they had big bags of M&Ms on sale. Don't they know I love M&Ms but they tempt me with them anyway."
    The difference is that the M&Ms can't jump in the cart without your cooperation, and they don't follow you home and repeatedly shove themselves into your face saying "oh, just have one, what could it hurt?" like her mom is doing.

    The cookies don't jump out of the bowl and into her mouth, either. Tell her Mom what it does hurt. Her pride, her diet, her well being. The truth sometimes hurts, but it is usually the best thing to say.

    Like Bobby said, is she comes to the door with cookies, don't answer the door.
  • tsh0ck
    tsh0ck Posts: 1,970 Member
    sorry to say but your mother is either dumb or she wants you to be fat. Next time - open the garbage can, in front of her - and throw out the cookies.

    are you real?
  • albayin
    albayin Posts: 2,524 Member
    The only person that can sabotage your diet is you. That's like saying "I went to the grocery store today and they had big bags of M&Ms on sale. Don't they know I love M&Ms but they tempt me with them anyway."
    The difference is that the M&Ms can't jump in the cart without your cooperation, and they don't follow you home and repeatedly shove themselves into your face saying "oh, just have one, what could it hurt?" like her mom is doing.

    I know "THEY (M&Ms) DO EXIST". LOL
    I love those commercials. :)

    Have you watched newest one(I think)? The lady M&M went to party...and other think she's naked....
  • Diary_Queen
    Diary_Queen Posts: 1,314 Member
    My family runs hot and cold.... either they are all sitting around eating junk and trying to give me some of it, or they rely totally on me to provide all the cooked meals. No one else cooks. No one else lifts a damn finger to count calories, cook vegetables, find lean meats or lower fat foods. It's a constant struggle, one that I would gladly opt out of if I didn't have children to feed. I look forward to the day I find my own life somewhere and can live by my rules. Seems a shame that I still can't manage that at 33, but drug and alcohol addiction was my focus for 12 years. I often feel like I've just started on life.
  • suegmune
    suegmune Posts: 81
    I hope you don't take the advice of some posters and be mean to her. That's just rude. I don't think she was meaning to be rude. I'm guessing she has always done that and its no different from when you weren't dieting. Besides the fact, you shouldn't think of it as dieting, its instead a "life change". You will always go to restaurants with friends and be tempted with treats. Or at the grocery store, or the bakery or wherever. Its up to you to make the choice. You do not have to go without, you just need to keep your portions and the quality of the other food you eat in check. I'm not a big fan of never having x,y and z ever again.

    I definitely think people like other people fat and "happy". Give your mom a break. Keep trying to make her understand and how important it is to you. Tell her your success, tell her how it makes you feel, make her feel like she wants to be part of it. And I have kids too, and I don't like them having lots of sweet stuff either, but every once in a while? Oh gosh, go for it. Its not like they will be having it every day.

    I dunno. I'd give anything to have my mom still around and bringing me sweets! Just take it as a challenge to "be good" or "be conscious" of what you put in your mouth.
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    The whole world does not revolve around you and your diet.
    Buck up!
    Either control yourself around other people at dinner, or cancel all such events.
    That is what I did except on my "free day".
    I can't control myself. PERIOD!
    And that means I no longer do family dinners or parties or anything except that one special day in the week where I can join the food orgy.
    Do what you think is best, but again, don't snivel over people who are just being who they are.
    Good Luck :flowerforyou:

    Wow kinda harsh huh? Her mother brought them into her house after she told her she was trying to lose weight. I think it'd be different if she went to her mother's and the stuff was there. But in her own home she should not have to buck up!
    Then STOP INVITING MOM OVER!
    Am I the only person living a simple life?
    Your "simple" is another person's "isolated from everything I enjoy about life." To each their own.
  • rayhartley
    rayhartley Posts: 5 Member
    something that my family finally realizes is that i will either bring fruit or vegies to a get together. if i want something sweet or "forbidden" i will make it and take it. keep just a very small amount and give the rest away. if i make a huge bunch of stuff left over from a get together that i had, i just make sure i have lots of baggies to send stuff home in. i hope this helps.
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    The only person that can sabotage your diet is you. That's like saying "I went to the grocery store today and they had big bags of M&Ms on sale. Don't they know I love M&Ms but they tempt me with them anyway."
    The difference is that the M&Ms can't jump in the cart without your cooperation, and they don't follow you home and repeatedly shove themselves into your face saying "oh, just have one, what could it hurt?" like her mom is doing.

    I know "THEY (M&Ms) DO EXIST". LOL
    I love those commercials. :)

    Have you watched newest one(I think)? The lady M&M went to party...and other think she's naked....
    The brown one? Yup, funny. :)
  • kathym42
    kathym42 Posts: 26
    Doubt she's trying to sabotage you unless she doesn't give a crap about her child and is an evil witch...which is unlikely. She just forgot.

    Congrats on resisting the temptation.

    LOL I JUST told her a couple hours before she came over.
    So, your mother is being wicked?
    If this is what you are saying, sever the relationship.
    Problem solved.

    That's just too harsh.
    Agree, especially since she wasn't the one that called her mom wicked
  • tsh0ck
    tsh0ck Posts: 1,970 Member
    Misery loves company. People who don't have the will power to control their own diets like to take down others with them.

    people who don't have the will power to control their own diets like to blame others for their problems.
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
    The only person that can sabotage your diet is you. That's like saying "I went to the grocery store today and they had big bags of M&Ms on sale. Don't they know I love M&Ms but they tempt me with them anyway."
    The difference is that the M&Ms can't jump in the cart without your cooperation, and they don't follow you home and repeatedly shove themselves into your face saying "oh, just have one, what could it hurt?" like her mom is doing.

    The cookies don't jump out of the bowl and into her mouth, either. Tell her Mom what it does hurt. Her pride, her diet, her well being. The truth sometimes hurts, but it is usually the best thing to say.

    Like Bobby said, is she comes to the door with cookies, don't answer the door.
    If you read her post, she didn't have them. It's not about willpower; it's about your loved ones showing you the respect to not intentionally, repeatedly try to undermine your efforts at self-improvement.
  • NoChub4Me
    NoChub4Me Posts: 27
    I don't know if you mother is trying to sabotage your efforts or if she just loves you. Why not take the goodies, say "thank you", and maybe enjoy one or two then give the rest away? Like to work, school, a neighbor? Just a suggestion.
  • RobynMWilson
    RobynMWilson Posts: 1,540 Member
    Yes! When I was originally losing my weight I was in 9th grade and the family still stockpiled Tasty Kakes and Entemann's and soda in the house. It was very hard but I just ignored the food. It became easier over time. Now I'm back home after being out on my own for almost 15 yrs and my mom is not a baker but constantly brings crap in the house and I just ignore it for the most part. I make her hide it from me too lol. I'm a school bus driver and up till June (when Mom retired) so Christmas was bad. I got about 70 gifts last year and at least half of them were goodies and Mom got almost as much from work (she was a school secretary lol). It's not easy but if you keep ignoring it, it will go away in your mind. They're not purposely trying to sabotage us, I know for my mom she just doesn't see the purpose of "eating clean". This woman, at 69yrs old, would pass a stress test with a cigarette in one hand, a hot dog in the other and askin the doc for a sip of her White Zinfadel instead of water during the test lol
  • IronPlayground
    IronPlayground Posts: 1,594 Member
    I think it's different when it comes to parents. You will always be her little girl who used to enjoy eating cookies. She was being mom. Give her a break.

    Also, you shouldn't look at cake and cookies as evil. If you can leave a little room for one of the two or both and still not go over your calories, then that's a good day.
  • kathym42
    kathym42 Posts: 26
    The only person that can sabotage your diet is you. That's like saying "I went to the grocery store today and they had big bags of M&Ms on sale. Don't they know I love M&Ms but they tempt me with them anyway."
    The difference is that the M&Ms can't jump in the cart without your cooperation, and they don't follow you home and repeatedly shove themselves into your face saying "oh, just have one, what could it hurt?" like her mom is doing.

    Wish there was a like button!
  • suziecue66
    suziecue66 Posts: 1,312 Member
    I think it's different when it comes to parents. You will always be her little girl who used to enjoy eating cookies. She was being mom. Give her a break.

    Also, you shouldn't look at cake and cookies as evil. If you can leave a little room for one of the two or both and still not go over your calories, then that's a good day.

    If mum bakes the cakes and cookies you could give her the challenge of making healthier, lower calorie versions. Lots of good websites. Skinnytaste.com is one.
  • jenslife82
    jenslife82 Posts: 229
    Doubt she's trying to sabotage you unless she doesn't give a crap about her child and is an evil witch...which is unlikely. She just forgot.

    Congrats on resisting the temptation.

    LOL I JUST told her a couple hours before she came over.
    So, your mother is being wicked?
    If this is what you are saying, sever the relationship.
    Problem solved.
    Wow dude. You're kind of a douche.
  • AnitaVolpato
    AnitaVolpato Posts: 204 Member
    LMAO@jenslife82.... I was about to say something but just sat on my hands...

    He is a meanie.... LOL
  • suziecue66
    suziecue66 Posts: 1,312 Member
    Doubt she's trying to sabotage you unless she doesn't give a crap about her child and is an evil witch...which is unlikely. She just forgot.

    Congrats on resisting the temptation.

    LOL I JUST told her a couple hours before she came over.
    So, your mother is being wicked?
    If this is what you are saying, sever the relationship.
    Problem solved.
    Wow dude. You're kind of a douche.

    Kind of sad really as doesn't feel any emotional ties to family particularly parents.
  • sunkissedlife
    sunkissedlife Posts: 2
    My family is the exact same way. During family gatherings the temptation. . . aargh! I love chocolate chip cookies. It doesn't hurt to reward yourself. If I know that I will be in the midst of temptation I usually spend all morning preparing myself. I exercise and keep imagining a happier healthier me. By the time I finish exercising I usually have earned myself a few sweets. I am looking forward to our family reunion this weekend. Hopefully I can earn myself a great meal and a slice of cherry cream pie. :) If I were you I would sit down with your mom and explain to her how you feel about your weight and how losing weight will make you feel and look healthier.
  • kathym42
    kathym42 Posts: 26
    Doubt she's trying to sabotage you unless she doesn't give a crap about her child and is an evil witch...which is unlikely. She just forgot.

    Congrats on resisting the temptation.

    LOL I JUST told her a couple hours before she came over.
    So, your mother is being wicked?
    If this is what you are saying, sever the relationship.
    Problem solved.
    Wow dude. You're kind of a douche.

    LOL..wish there was a like button here!
  • suziecue66
    suziecue66 Posts: 1,312 Member
    My family is the exact same way. During family gatherings the temptation. . . aargh! I love chocolate chip cookies. It doesn't hurt to reward yourself. If I know that I will be in the midst of temptation I usually spend all morning preparing myself. I exercise and keep imagining a happier healthier me. By the time I finish exercising I usually have earned myself a few sweets. I am looking forward to our family reunion this weekend. Hopefully I can earn myself a great meal and a slice of cherry cream pie. :) If I were you I would sit down with your mom and explain to her how you feel about your weight and how losing weight will make you feel and look healthier.

    http://www.skinnytaste.com/2009/06/super-light-blueberry-cream-pie.html
    Looks quite good.
  • emnk5308
    emnk5308 Posts: 736
    Day 1 of Insanity..my boyfriend brings me a Nutty Bar O.O So damn hard to say no!! =(
  • lg3703
    lg3703 Posts: 190
    Just do what every child does when their mother or grandmother does something that annoys them or (my favorite) gives advise and tells you how wrong you're living your life .... SMILE, TAKE IT... then do whatever YOU want! Next time say " thanks mom, that's so considerate, or lovely but I'm not hungry right now." Make her feel great for doing her motherly duties ... then trash it when she leaves. =]
  • markklug
    markklug Posts: 4
    it's tough to tell your mother no but she will understand that you are trying to do better
    for yourself. Keep your guard up Don't give into your sweet tooth.
  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
    This is what I mean.. I've said it before, this is why I don't generally tell family I'm TRYING to lose weight. My mom comes over for dinner tonight. She brings a big bowl of cookies and a cake. It's like what the heck? She knows I don't want that junk, she knows it's hard to say no to chocolate chip cookies, but still. You'd think she'd want to help, or support me... Bleh


    and NO I didn't have any!! :laugh:

    Anyone else go through this too? It's driving me bonkers.
    So..... It bothers you when she brings cake and cookies over because you mentioned you're losing weight, but it would be perfectly OK for her to bring over cake and cookies if you don't tell her you're trying to lose weight?:huh:
  • morganmay92
    morganmay92 Posts: 78
    UGH hate that! My family eats fast food once or twice a week and I have told them I am trying to stay AWAY from it.
  • tsh0ck
    tsh0ck Posts: 1,970 Member
    UGH hate that! My family eats fast food once or twice a week and I have told them I am trying to stay AWAY from it.

    why?
  • laurenhefner
    laurenhefner Posts: 8
    Ugh.. my family is sort of similar (well, my mom..). She doesn't specifically try to sabotage it - but she is condescending about it. I think she's jealous.. she likes to make snarky comments about how I'm "obsessed" with working out and eating healthy. Uh, not hardly. I generally watch waht I eat, but I often go to wineries or great restaurants, and I work out 4-5x/week. It's just.. not her, and she doesn't get it or want to.

    When I got my FitBit she was like "wow, just another way to work out even when you aren't working out." Thanks, mom.
  • lyndabw
    lyndabw Posts: 24 Member
    oh yes,
    My hubby likes my behind just the way it is, well its need pairing down alot, its hard to just sa no but you will figure it out .
    becuase your well meaning family will not stop. HELPING you.
    :noway: :noway:

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