Spa owner yells at Mom of Autistic child-Facebook Firestorm
Replies
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It doesn't make me feel any better if you are embarrassed and/or aware that your child has spoiled my day.
A crying child spoils your day? Maybe if you changed your attitude about life, little things wouldn't spoil your day do easily.
Try spending an 11 hour flight sitting next to a screaming child that rips out one of your earrings while the mom tells you how adorable their angel is. Pretty sure that screaming spawn of Satan ruined my day as well as everyone else on the flight and it would take the attitude of a saint not to feel that way
Having been THAT mother with the screaming baby on an airplane (who by the way was 14 months old, and had an earache in one ear... I know this because I had taken her to the pediatrician two days prior and she was on antibiotics) I can assure you, most parent's don't want their child screaming any more than you want a child screaming on the airplane. But also having seen adults have bigger tantrums than the baby's (and why more unreasonable than a baby's) I'll take a baby screaming (as it is their primary means to communicate they are not happy) than the adults that do the same damn thing. Thank the dear Lord above, we had understanding flight attendants and that we just got the nasty looks from only a couple of passangers.
But, I guess I just shouldn't take my child to go see her great-grandparents that she won't remember... until when? They die?0 -
It doesn't make me feel any better if you are embarrassed and/or aware that your child has spoiled my day.
A crying child spoils your day? Maybe if you changed your attitude about life, little things wouldn't spoil your day do easily.
Try spending an 11 hour flight sitting next to a screaming child that rips out one of your earrings while the mom tells you how adorable their angel is. Pretty sure that screaming spawn of Satan ruined my day as well as everyone else on the flight and it would take the attitude of a saint not to feel that way
Having been THAT mother with the screaming baby on an airplane (who by the way was 14 months old, and had an earache in one ear... I know this because I had taken her to the pediatrician two days prior and she was on antibiotics) I can assure you, most parent's don't want their child screaming any more than you want a child screaming on the airplane. But also having seen adults have bigger tantrums than the baby's (and why more unreasonable than a baby's) I'll take a baby screaming (as it is their primary means to communicate they are not happy) than the adults that do the same damn thing. Thank the dear Lord above, we had understanding flight attendants and that we just got the nasty looks from only a couple of passangers.
But, I guess I just shouldn't take my child to go see her great-grandparents that she won't remember... until when? They die?
Yes, because your screaming child you can't shut up is more important than every single other living soul on the plane. The brat ripped out my earring while I was trying to sleep. Pretty sure I had a right to be pissed.... And if the customer service line after the flight was any indication... More than 25 other people felt the same way. Who cares you make everyone else miserable, the world revolves around you.0 -
What are the odds that two MFPers who previously didn't know each other would end up on the same flight and have this experience and then end up in this thread where the discussion of it would be so relevant?!?
Amazing!
(PS: HB, L!)0 -
upscale spa, her business, her rules. dont bring kids...
Or blacks, gays, transsexuals, Jews ... Once you start that list of exclusions, it's all downhill from there.
And there we go folks, taking it to the extreme with comparisions that really don't compare.
No kids allowed leads directly to homophobia and racism everytime. :huh:
Well kids are their own ethnicity group apparently........
Well, no. Just like transsexuals or gays aren't their own ethnic group. They all are, however sections of society and discrimination against them is distatseful to say the least.
I have a child - sometimes they act out, even the best-behaved child in the world has the occasional meltdown, its what children do.
The planet is full of sounds - the rooster crows in the morning, dogs bark, birds sing, aint nothing we can to to change that, I suggest if you don't like it you become a hermit or something.
Having said all that - I have never been to a spa, upscale or otherwise, all seems a bit wankerish to me.
(edited to change cockerel to rooster because MFP is somewhat overzealous on perceived expletives).
Kids aren't a protected group. While age discrimination exists, it deals with people who are OVER a certain age as opposed to UNDER.
Comparing "no kids allowed" to "no blacks, gays, transsexuals, Jews allowed" is very, very silly and not at all relevant.0 -
What are the odds that two MFPers who previously didn't know each other would end up on the same flight and have this experience and then end up in this thread where the discussion of it would be so relevant?!?
Amazing!
(PS: HB, L!)
I know right. Mind blown.0 -
It doesn't make me feel any better if you are embarrassed and/or aware that your child has spoiled my day.
A crying child spoils your day? Maybe if you changed your attitude about life, little things wouldn't spoil your day do easily.
Try spending an 11 hour flight sitting next to a screaming child that rips out one of your earrings while the mom tells you how adorable their angel is. Pretty sure that screaming spawn of Satan ruined my day as well as everyone else on the flight and it would take the attitude of a saint not to feel that way
Having been THAT mother with the screaming baby on an airplane (who by the way was 14 months old, and had an earache in one ear... I know this because I had taken her to the pediatrician two days prior and she was on antibiotics) I can assure you, most parent's don't want their child screaming any more than you want a child screaming on the airplane. But also having seen adults have bigger tantrums than the baby's (and why more unreasonable than a baby's) I'll take a baby screaming (as it is their primary means to communicate they are not happy) than the adults that do the same damn thing. Thank the dear Lord above, we had understanding flight attendants and that we just got the nasty looks from only a couple of passangers.
But, I guess I just shouldn't take my child to go see her great-grandparents that she won't remember... until when? They die?
Yes, because your screaming child you can't shut up is more important than every single other living soul on the plane. The brat ripped out my earring while I was trying to sleep. Pretty sure I had a right to be pissed.... And if the customer service line after the flight was any indication... More than 25 other people felt the same way. Who cares you make everyone else miserable, the world revolves around you.
That is your assertion, not mine... and while in your particular instance that you described, I can see why you would be pissed, I wouldn't want someone elses child ripping my earrings out either and I would be pissed too... However, there are a mirade of reasons that a baby is on an airplane and not one of them are "so I can piss off th 250 people crammed in a glorified sardine can". I would hate to be the type of person that believes this either.0 -
It doesn't make me feel any better if you are embarrassed and/or aware that your child has spoiled my day.
A crying child spoils your day? Maybe if you changed your attitude about life, little things wouldn't spoil your day do easily.
Try spending an 11 hour flight sitting next to a screaming child that rips out one of your earrings while the mom tells you how adorable their angel is. Pretty sure that screaming spawn of Satan ruined my day as well as everyone else on the flight and it would take the attitude of a saint not to feel that way
Having been THAT mother with the screaming baby on an airplane (who by the way was 14 months old, and had an earache in one ear... I know this because I had taken her to the pediatrician two days prior and she was on antibiotics) I can assure you, most parent's don't want their child screaming any more than you want a child screaming on the airplane. But also having seen adults have bigger tantrums than the baby's (and why more unreasonable than a baby's) I'll take a baby screaming (as it is their primary means to communicate they are not happy) than the adults that do the same damn thing. Thank the dear Lord above, we had understanding flight attendants and that we just got the nasty looks from only a couple of passangers.
But, I guess I just shouldn't take my child to go see her great-grandparents that she won't remember... until when? They die?
Yes, because your screaming child you can't shut up is more important than every single other living soul on the plane. The brat ripped out my earring while I was trying to sleep. Pretty sure I had a right to be pissed.... And if the customer service line after the flight was any indication... More than 25 other people felt the same way. Who cares you make everyone else miserable, the world revolves around you.
Whoa...back the hostility train up a bit. Yes, you had every right to be upset...being trapped on a plane with a screaming kid (especially one who assaulted you) sucks, I will give you that. And, the parent in question sounds like a twit & I'm sorry you had to deal with it. But it's not like the parent can leave the room...what are they supposed to do? Use of duct tape & various restraints would garner just as much hatred from other passengers. Are people with babies/toddlers who happen to live far away from family supposed to wait until their kids are fully grown to travel to see them?0 -
It doesn't make me feel any better if you are embarrassed and/or aware that your child has spoiled my day.
A crying child spoils your day? Maybe if you changed your attitude about life, little things wouldn't spoil your day do easily.
Try spending an 11 hour flight sitting next to a screaming child that rips out one of your earrings while the mom tells you how adorable their angel is. Pretty sure that screaming spawn of Satan ruined my day as well as everyone else on the flight and it would take the attitude of a saint not to feel that way
Having been THAT mother with the screaming baby on an airplane (who by the way was 14 months old, and had an earache in one ear... I know this because I had taken her to the pediatrician two days prior and she was on antibiotics) I can assure you, most parent's don't want their child screaming any more than you want a child screaming on the airplane. But also having seen adults have bigger tantrums than the baby's (and why more unreasonable than a baby's) I'll take a baby screaming (as it is their primary means to communicate they are not happy) than the adults that do the same damn thing. Thank the dear Lord above, we had understanding flight attendants and that we just got the nasty looks from only a couple of passangers.
But, I guess I just shouldn't take my child to go see her great-grandparents that she won't remember... until when? They die?
Yes, because your screaming child you can't shut up is more important than every single other living soul on the plane. The brat ripped out my earring while I was trying to sleep. Pretty sure I had a right to be pissed.... And if the customer service line after the flight was any indication... More than 25 other people felt the same way. Who cares you make everyone else miserable, the world revolves around you.
Whoa...back the hostility train up a bit. Yes, you had every right to be upset...being trapped on a plane with a screaming kid (especially one who assaulted you) sucks, I will give you that. And, the parent in question sounds like a twit & I'm sorry you had to deal with it. But it's not like the parent can leave the room...what are they supposed to do? Use of duct tape & various restraints would garner just as much hatred from other passengers. Are people with babies/toddlers who happen to live far away from family supposed to wait until their kids are fully grown to travel to see them?
Chloroform I hear works wonders.0 -
i agree that the owner handled it poorly but i have a strong opinion of small children and upscale places.
one story especially comes to mind. i was at a nice restaurant with my family for dinner and the table next to us had a child that screamed, LOUDLY for the whole hour or so we were there. it was incredibly frustrating because the parents did nothing.
the waitress we had went up to them and said "if you would like some privacy for your child, we can move you to a more secluded VIP room free of charge"
the lady of the child flipped out and told the waitress to get the manager
the mother said something like "i'm insulted that you would insinuate that our child is a bother and that we would need a private room"
so what happened? the family got their dinner free of charge and the waitress got yelled at by the woman. and we had to deal with mind numbing screaming for an hour.
i was so angry.
autistic child or not, try to take them to more suitable places for children. because that one experience ruined my night. and i can understand how a screaming child would ruin a day at the spa too.
it goes both ways. there are horrible business owners in this world, but horrible customers as well.0 -
Chloroform I hear works wonders.
Trust me, if it were legal (and not lethal) parents would use it... there is a reason baby Dimetapp and baby benedryl no longer exists for kids under the age of 5 (trust me, my husband looked because he didn't want to have the screaming kid)... because of parents using to keep their kids from screaming. I agree, the mom in your experience was a twit... I sure as hell wouldn't have let my child near someones earrings and I would have kept them as far away out of the anothers personal space as I could... but screaming, sometimes there just isn't much you can do but to let the kid wear themselves out... It sucks, I get it... I sucks for you and it sucks for me as the mom, to have to try and calm the kiddo down... but outside of never leaving the house ever, we are going to have to expose our kids to such experiences as much as it sucks for those that would rather never see a child on the face of the planet... unless they were "perfect" or a robot... otherwise, they will never know how to deal with such situations. After our first flight (and finishing her antibiotics) I learned how to keep her calm and asleep so the return flight was much better than the first flight... Not a peep until we started to land and by then she was already acclimated to the surrounding environment.0 -
You know what a lot of people seem to need?
0 -
WOW the world would be way better if we all tried to get along, and everybody relized kids will be kids and adults should know better then have a tantrum because a child cries. My kids are grown and never has a child crying, tantrum or any other action has ever ruined my day of what ever i am doing. The only time someone can ruin your day is if you allow them to.
I would much rather put up with a child worst tantrum then to see a adult act like a child having a tantrum
children learn that it is not right and an adult should already know
Come on Adults lets be adults and those of you who think it should be your way grow up0 -
You know what a lot of people seem to need?
liliawodna
I completely agree with you0 -
upscale spa, her business, her rules. dont bring kids...
Or blacks, gays, transsexuals, Jews ... Once you start that list of exclusions, it's all downhill from there.
And there we go folks, taking it to the extreme with comparisions that really don't compare.
No kids allowed leads directly to homophobia and racism everytime. :huh:
Well kids are their own ethnicity group apparently........
Well, no. Just like transsexuals or gays aren't their own ethnic group. They all are, however sections of society and discrimination against them is distatseful to say the least.
I have a child - sometimes they act out, even the best-behaved child in the world has the occasional meltdown, its what children do.
The planet is full of sounds - the rooster crows in the morning, dogs bark, birds sing, aint nothing we can to to change that, I suggest if you don't like it you become a hermit or something.
Having said all that - I have never been to a spa, upscale or otherwise, all seems a bit wankerish to me.
(edited to change cockerel to rooster because MFP is somewhat overzealous on perceived expletives).
Kids aren't a protected group. While age discrimination exists, it deals with people who are OVER a certain age as opposed to UNDER.
Comparing "no kids allowed" to "no blacks, gays, transsexuals, Jews allowed" is very, very silly and not at all relevant.
What on earth is a "protected group"?
All of the above things are dividing society based on arbitary characteristics that have nothing to do with the person. This thread clearly proves that discrimination against children exists, so don't tell me ageism is only relevant with respect to the elderly.
I'm not the most overzealous of parents and it still surprises me that people can discriminate against a whole section of society based on their age whilst at the same time proporting to be uber-liberal.
Children cry and children will exist as long as the human race does so you might as well get over it.0 -
WOW the world would be way better if we all tried to get along, and everybody relized kids will be kids and adults should know better then have a tantrum because a child cries. My kids are grown and never has a child crying, tantrum or any other action has ever ruined my day of what ever i am doing. The only time someone can ruin your day is if you allow them to.
I would much rather put up with a child worst tantrum then to see a adult act like a child having a tantrum
children learn that it is not right and an adult should already know
Come on Adults lets be adults and those of you who think it should be your way grow up
But why should other people out enjoying their day have to put up with someone else's sex trophy acting like a wild animal?0 -
upscale spa, her business, her rules. dont bring kids...
Or blacks, gays, transsexuals, Jews ... Once you start that list of exclusions, it's all downhill from there.
And there we go folks, taking it to the extreme with comparisions that really don't compare.
No kids allowed leads directly to homophobia and racism everytime. :huh:
Well kids are their own ethnicity group apparently........
Well, no. Just like transsexuals or gays aren't their own ethnic group. They all are, however sections of society and discrimination against them is distatseful to say the least.
I have a child - sometimes they act out, even the best-behaved child in the world has the occasional meltdown, its what children do.
The planet is full of sounds - the rooster crows in the morning, dogs bark, birds sing, aint nothing we can to to change that, I suggest if you don't like it you become a hermit or something.
Having said all that - I have never been to a spa, upscale or otherwise, all seems a bit wankerish to me.
(edited to change cockerel to rooster because MFP is somewhat overzealous on perceived expletives).
Kids aren't a protected group. While age discrimination exists, it deals with people who are OVER a certain age as opposed to UNDER.
Comparing "no kids allowed" to "no blacks, gays, transsexuals, Jews allowed" is very, very silly and not at all relevant.
What on earth is a "protected group"?
All of the above things are dividing society based on arbitary characteristics that have nothing to do with the person. This thread clearly proves that discrimination against children exists, so don't tell me ageism is only relevant with respect to the elderly.
I'm not the most overzealous of parents and it still surprises me that people can discriminate against a whole section of society based on their age whilst at the same time proporting to be uber-liberal.
Children cry and children will exist as long as the human race does so you might as well get over it.
It's actually a protected class, you should have learned about these in middle school at the latest.0 -
Chloroform I hear works wonders.
Trust me, if it were legal (and not lethal) parents would use it... there is a reason baby Dimetapp and baby benedryl no longer exists for kids under the age of 5 (trust me, my husband looked because he didn't want to have the screaming kid)... because of parents using to keep their kids from screaming. I agree, the mom in your experience was a twit... I sure as hell wouldn't have let my child near someones earrings and I would have kept them as far away out of the anothers personal space as I could... but screaming, sometimes there just isn't much you can do but to let the kid wear themselves out... It sucks, I get it... I sucks for you and it sucks for me as the mom, to have to try and calm the kiddo down... but outside of never leaving the house ever, we are going to have to expose our kids to such experiences as much as it sucks for those that would rather never see a child on the face of the planet... unless they were "perfect" or a robot... otherwise, they will never know how to deal with such situations. After our first flight (and finishing her antibiotics) I learned how to keep her calm and asleep so the return flight was much better than the first flight... Not a peep until we started to land and by then she was already acclimated to the surrounding environment.
Yeah I get that and I have flown enough I have experienced it all. I have seen parents get kicked off, or I have wound up playing with a kid next to me on a flight. I don't blame the kids as much as the parents. There are those parents out there who make no effort to control their kids. And then you also have the ones who go the extra mile to try and make things go smoothly and everything between.0 -
Wow. About the brat on the plane making everyone miserable and yanking out somebody's earring...if that had been MY ear, I would have backhanded the kid purely as an unintended reflex.0
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This thread clearly proves that discrimination against children exists, so don't tell me ageism is only relevant with respect to the elderly.
I'm telling you that ageism is only relevant with respect to the elderly.
There is some measure of protection for the youth of America, although most of it (see e.g. the Housing Act) is really directed towards FAMILIES with children, but none of it is relevant here. So again, comparing any so-called discrimination against kids to discrimination against "blacks, gays, transsexuals, Jews" is very, very silly.0 -
It's actually a protected class, you should have learned about these in middle school at the latest.
If you're referring to Protected Groups and Protected Classes (which children do not fall under), those are laws in the United States. The other poster here who you are ridiculing is in England. Be careful making assumptions on the curriculum of all middle schools, especially when you're going to belittle someone for their lack of incorrect data.0 -
The beauty of social media at work. Hopefully the place is shut down by the end of the month!0
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I don't care...less FB FOOLISHNESS and more Weightloss stories! No one cares about this story...it's probably a lie as many things are on FB!0
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I don't care...less FB FOOLISHNESS and more Weightloss stories! No one cares about this story...it's probably a lie as many things are on FB!
This is the chit-chat section. For more weight loss related posts, see the other sections.
Not just a FB story; it's been in the news. You didn't have to come into this thread, you know?0 -
Totalsham: You clearly do not have kids or if so, have never taken a toddler to get a haircut. Autism or not, many little kids throw fits when they get it done. If a spa considers themselves UPSCALE and does not want to deal with kids in this manner, then they should clearly state this rule in advance and not take appointments accordingly. Plain and simple-there are appropriate ways to handle these situations and inappropriate ways to handle them. While I was not present at the time of this particular incident, it was clearly not handled appropriately if other clientele were able to hear it and were uncomfortable with it.0
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The beauty of social media at work. Hopefully the place is shut down by the end of the month!
It would be better if FB was shut down by the end of the month.0 -
But clearly the My Fitness Pal message board is an acceptable outlet0
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Happy birthday, Lea!ETA: Whoops, sorry......wrong thread.
That's all you got???? I'm disappointed!
Then you obviously do not understand the remarkable power of the "HB, L!"
(However, that this thread still exists hours after I unleashed it is making me reconsider my understanding of it.)0 -
I can't get this quoting thing down right but the last box is my answer.But regardless of all of that, one cannot ever judge from a single incident when you see any scenario between parent and child. You don't know the background. It is amazing the level of judgement we have to deal with as parents in our society. It's crippling really. People also need to understand that kids are kids. Stuff happens. Yes, sometimes they even have tantrums over the toy they didn't want. I do agree that there are various ways to reduce the distraction, etc. but again, without knowing the background, you simply cannot know. Not every child responds the same and not every situatiojn can be avoided.That's all true, but do you expect a bystander to know the background for your child's tantrum? Without being overly callous, the end result and impact on my life is the same regardless of the background.
Again, for example, if you rear end my car, it doesn't matter overly much whether you did it because you were texting, or drunk, or distracted, or swerving to avoid a dog, or fell asleep because of untreatable narcolepsy. You still rear-ended me.
Now, afterward, if you want to explain the background to me, perhaps I'll be understanding and I agree that once the background is known, you should probably expect a certain degree of understanding from others in a polite society. If you tell me that, "Sorry, this is what's going on, and you're trying your best, etc." I'll probably nod and say it's not a problem.
I've also experienced the opposite spectrum, however, when I asked a woman to please restrain her child from kicking me and my bag while waiting in line, and the only response I got was was "He's autistic". As in: YOU deal with it.You make a good point Joocey. Regardless of the intent, there is an impact on others. That's very true!
Your examples don't match up though. Those other causes are all illegal and not part of normal development.
Part of living in a community is living with others. Sure we have societal expectations. I just think it is sad that many in this thread are so rigid in those expectations given something that is developmentally appropriate to the community members they are mingling with.
As for the person stating the cause, my perception isn't necessarily that the person is asking you to deal with it but rather the person is asking for your compassion and understanding as they try to deal with something that isn't altogether easy to begin with. Even some support would be great!
This next part isn't aimed at Joocey. I appreciated Joocey's treatment of my quotes, even if I didn't fully agree with all of it. This next part is a few additional general comments I would like to make.
I'm going to reveal here that I also have a disability. Mine isn't behavioral. My child's disability is. Mine is difficult enough. Every time people talk about the government being overly involved, I have to thank my lucky stars that they continue to be involved in the area of supporting those with disabilities. Society really doesn't. Not long ago, I would have not been able to work and been a contributing member of society. Even so, I find there is a lot more stigma with the behavioral one. Life is not perfect. Many parents do more than you know to keep things from overly impacting others. Having said that, sometimes you have to also realize that there is a lot going on and a little patience goes a long way.
But even if we take the disability out of it and just focus on a crying 2 year old, I find it sad that we definitely have a lot of ageism here (whether it is a protected class or not) to the point that we can't deal with NORMAL behavior without having tantrums of our own, internal or otherwise. Again, a little patience goes a long way.
I find it interesting that the children are expected to forgo individuality and even normal reflexes because they are expected to conform to community standards and basic be perfect mini adults (even though adults aren't) but adults are expected to have things catered to them as individuals even though they live in a community. We as a society fluctuate on a continuum of individualistic stance vs. community stance. Regardless of where in the continuum you place your ideologies, both exist.
(I'm not sure the last paragraph conveys what I'm trying to say so if you pick it apart, I'm okay. It might add clarity, even if I don't agree with everyone's stance in this continuum).0 -
WOW the world would be way better if we all tried to get along, and everybody relized kids will be kids and adults should know better then have a tantrum because a child cries. My kids are grown and never has a child crying, tantrum or any other action has ever ruined my day of what ever i am doing. The only time someone can ruin your day is if you allow them to.
I would much rather put up with a child worst tantrum then to see a adult act like a child having a tantrum
children learn that it is not right and an adult should already know
Come on Adults lets be adults and those of you who think it should be your way grow up
But why should other people out enjoying their day have to put up with someone else's sex trophy acting like a wild animal?
I did not say children should be allowed to misbehave but most parents try to teach thier child it is not proper behavior and with the correct guidance the kids learn not to misbehave. Parents can not predict when thier child will act up. Believe me if they could we would see alot less kids crying and bisbehaving in public.
That being said I have seen way worse misbehaving from ADULTS who SHOULD know better and a much worse scene then a child ever could.
Ever go to a NICE restraunt and sit accross from a table where the ADULTS are all drunk and MISBEHAVING ? I have and tell you what would rather sit across from a CHILD on thier worst behavior, at least the parent will be trying to stop it. So who is going to stop the adult from making a scene interupting everyones meal and being very inappropriate in almost everyway? The manager? the Waitress? the Police?
most of the time a child can be calmed down or easily removed from the scene
a adult much harder and you don't have a parent trying to calm them down and about the only way to remove the adult is to get physical0 -
Then you obviously do not understand the remarkable power of the "HB, L!"
I think the logic behind "HB, L" would shut down almost every thread.0
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