WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR DECEMBER 2014
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Thanks for your continued support!
Beth - I suppose life has always been hard for young people, but it seems to be such an extreme nowadays. Katherine is so upset that she is 24 and not completely self-sufficient. I don't know if that is my fault or the internal pressure she puts on herself. I was surprised to hear her say it and she has been reassured that everyone, at all stages of life, sometimes needs financial help when times are tough. She has been mostly self-sufficient, but she is also working a totally crappy job with no benefits (jobs are hard to come by) and going to school full-time, in addition to having had two major surgeries this year plus the whole vestibular migraine thing. That's huge for anyone at any age! I feel your pain with your son. Andrew would miss so much school and then, when he would finally feel better, his anxiety about returning to school would kick off another bout of IBS and depression. It was such a relief to both of us when he was allowed to do his final semester completely online. All I know to do is keep being advocate for them and stand by to help them up when they fall.
If any of you have ever dealt with an adult who has had inpatient mental health care, I would love to hear from you! I am virtually certain that Katherine will not be going home to her condo, but staying with me, for a while. My thoughts are to assign her daily tasks to accomplish: some of those tasks will be to help me so that she feels like she is contributing to her upkeep and others to help her transition back to her condo (she's never unpacked since she moved). I feel like structure and expectations will help her cope better than leaving her at loose ends. She will also be diligently searching for a job. She makes so little at her full-time job, that she can probably find a decent paying part time job making the same amount and will make it easier to get her school work done. If she does go back to work at her current job, the suggestion will be that she states up front that she will not tolerate any more bullying from her coworker (with promises of attorney contact otherwise) and that she will be having multiple medical appointments and that she will be keeping them, period. The hope is that they will fire her so that she can draw unemployment until she can find something else. If not, she has stated her case and her limits with what will be tolerated.
Thanks for letting me get all of that out there! I hope everyone has a great day!
Carol in NC0 -
Just had a bit of a ding dong with DH about arrangements for everyone for Christmas. I am stressed and he doesn't understand why! ! ! So now he is stressed and upset! I have almost everyone confirmed now except his DD #2 who can't give me an answer yet. I'm sure you all understand that it's not only food, but washing bed linen, towels, cleaning etc. I'm sure he will calm down, but I more or less told him that he could be responsible for DD#2 :ohwell: as I had so much to do on that day. :sad:
By the way the carpet looks fabulous and the carpet men were very funny, though cost a bit more than we thought because they had to rip up the sisal which was stuck to the underlay. They were good entertainment though! ! ! ! While the men were here I did all my Christmas cards! :bigsmile:
American Fish Chowder for dinner tonight. :bigsmile:
Heather in cold Hampshire UK
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Happy Monday !
Thank you everyone for the Birthday wishes. I am now officially 50 years old. Not as bad as I thought it would be. Sister and Dad were nice, husband was tolerable, but since I was mean to him when he turned 50, I feel lucky that he wasn't as mean back. I took my sister to my favorite Mexican grocery store, and we had a good time (she lives around 100 miles away and has a dog with cancer, so we only see each other for special occasions). Our next special occasion will be the Frankie Valle concert in April.
DS had a good weekend of bowling. 75% fill for High School bowling (hopefully that will keep creeping higher as the season progresses). 235 game (with a few 180's) for Travel League, and he won all 4 of his points for his team. Unfortunately, he injured his right shoulder playing basketball at a friends' birthday party, so I will talk with his Physical Therapist about his next steps. Hopefully he can still bowl at practice tonight.
Yesterday, I went for quality over quantity in my Birthday Lunch, and luckily lost that pound that had me stuck. Hopefully that means my platteau is over, and I can start losing again. Today, back to eating healthy again, and excited about it. I even found a good price on snow pea pods, so I'm happy that will be my snack for today.
Today our weather is freezing rain. Sometimes I can see a snowflake. Most of the roads have been pre-salted, so travel wasn't too bad this morning.
Hugs to everyone with needs, congrats to everyone with successes.
Terri in Milwaukee0 -
This afternoon is our first round of line dance performances. We will dance nine dances at three places--one senior independent living and two assisted living. I've practiced the dances often enough that I feel confident that I'll remember all the steps even with an audience. This is my big holiday event and I am really looking forward to it. I have a special outfit to wear that includes earrings with dogs in holiday hats.
best wishes to all of you who are dealing with so many stressful situations now.
Barbie from NW Washington 0 -
Good morning everyone! Today starts the long hard drive for the finish! I have to thoroughly clean the studio and gallery, get the shelves, tables and pedestals in place, put up my christmas lights, and start to arrange the artwork so it looks nice for the open house. I'm starting to get excited now. Several of my friends sent their pottery home with me to use in my open house, and one friend is bringing over her rack of prints from her paintings. One of my friends, who is one of the "big dogs" in our local pottery scene, said I can come over on Wednesday and pick up some of his work to use. (Major feather in my cap to have his stuff here!) I finally got in touch with the painted furniture lady and she is definitely bringing her pieces on Thursday. The fiber artist and jeweler are coming tomorrow. So much to do to get ready!!!
I'm feeling so much better too. My fever sore is to that dried up crusty scab stage, so it's almost gone. My other problem (on the south end) is much improved. I've been sleeping well the last two nights and haven't had headaches or angina for a couple of days. And my drafting is all done too. All good news!
My quasi-intern is supposed to be coming today to mop the floor. I have two rooms behind my office that I have been using as studio space and I've cleaned them out and will be using those rooms as additional gallery space for the show, so the floors are caked with clay and glaze. All that has to be wet mopped several times to just be presentable.
Sassy, one of my friends made the vegetable tree for the show over the weekend, and it was really beautiful. But she said it was harder than she thought to put the veggies on the toothpicks. I think I'm going to make a cone out of clay and make holes for the toothpicks, and then I can use it over and over. But it'll have to wait till after my show. Then this morning I was thinking about doing it with a styrofoam cone wrapped in plastic wrap, and doing one with cookies. Hubby thinks I can do one with fudge. Anyway, I'm having such fun with these ideas. Thanks so much, again, for the idea.
Have a great day everyone!
Sylvia
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Today's joke of the day:
By the time the soldier pulled into the little town, every hotel room was taken. "You've got to have a room somewhere", he pleaded with a proprietor. "Well, I do have a double room with one occupant, but he is an Air Force guy" admitted the manager, and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past. I'm not sure it'd be worth it to you.
" No problem." the tired Army guy assured him, "I'll take it." The next morning the soldier came down to breakfasts bright-eyed and bushy tailed. "How'd you sleep?" asked the manager. "Never better", said the soldier. The manager was impressed. "No problem with the other guy snoring all night long?" "No, I shut him up in no time", explained the soldier.
"How'd you manage that?" asked the proprietor.
"Well, he was already in bed, snoring away, when I walked into the room, so I gave him a kiss on the cheek" explained the soldier. “Then, I whispered in his ear 'Good night beautiful', and he sat up all night watching me."
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Yesterday's joke of the day:
A couple is in bed sleeping when there's a rat-a-tat-tat on the door.
The husband rolls over and looks at the clock, and it's half past 3 in the morning.” I’m not getting out of bed at this time," he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. So he drags himself out of bed, goes downstairs, opens the door, and there's a man standing there. It didn't take the homeowner long to realize the man was drunk.
"Hi there," slurs the stranger, "Can you give me a push?" "No, get lost. It's half past three and I was in bed," says the man as he slams the door. He goes back up to bed and tell his wife what happened and she says, "That wasn't very nice of you. Remember that night we broke down in the pouring rain on the way to pick the kids up from the baby-sitter and you had to knock on that man's house to get us started again? What would have happened if he'd told us to get lost?"
"But the guy was drunk," says the husband.
"It doesn't matter," says the wife.” He needs our help and it would be the Christian thing to help him." So the husband gets out of bed again, gets dressed, and goes downstairs.
He opens the door, and not being able to see the stranger anywhere,
He shouts, "Hey, do you still want a push?"
And he hears a voice cry out, "Yeah, please."
So, still being unable to see the stranger he shouts, "Where are you?" The drunk replies, "Over here, on the swing." 0 -
Carol - You have my prayers and support, and I have a little experience, but I'm not sure I would be able to help. You may personal message me if interested. Here is my experience: Ex-husband and adult daughter (23) are bi-polar and ex is OCD. Sister, who passed in January, lived with me, and she was schizophrenic, but I never fully understood her issues, just tolerated them because I didn't know what else to do. I had to go to the Pharmacy with her, because every month she claimed the Pharmacist "shorted" her meds. i had to lock the meds in a safe, and only give her what she was supposed to take at the time she was allowed to take it. I started having to tell her when and what and how much to eat, how to dress, when to pay her bills and how much, take her to the store, work-out facility, pretty much everywhere she needed to be. Luckily she wasn't violent toward us, so we didn't fear for our lives, but did seriously fear for hers. Personally, I felt like the In-patient treatment facility released her early, but they didn't listen to my opinion. It seems that every situation is different, I hope you are able to find strength, flexibility, and understanding.
Anyway, Prayers ! ! !
Terri in Milwaukee0 -
Hugs for all you wonderful women dealing with mental health issues in your loved ones. I know how hard it is when DH is having a bad time. Luckily his meds are working and he has been able to cut down. (Apart from today's blip) My son has depresdion, but I live so far away from him I haven't had to deal with it. He is currently much better.
Such a difficult time. Love to you.
Heather UK0 -
My marathon tags!!!! she just sent me a draft (the date is wrong, she'll redo it) I am so excited. the foot stamp is one that I had her create because I run in vibram 5 finger shoes.. I can't wait !!0 -
Happy dreary rainy day from Il.
have a good one
hugs
jane0 -
Carol, thank you for sharing your story, hearts and prayers for your family, Joyce0
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Tuesday here and a nice day. Pensions in bank, shopping list done and so BIG shop today.
Hatha yoga, Circuit A (chest, tris and booty) and 1 hour walk.
Lesley in Tasmania0 -
Luncheon went well; I made reservation for 15 to 18; we were 17...BAM!!! Had one whiskey BBQ rib (shared appetizer) and ordered a wonderful mixed greens and beet balsamic glazed salad. Water is very rough today. Given a huge box of (what else???) dark Godiva for b-day later in month....will share and eat SLOWLY..........
Forgot earlier.........Someone ( Joyce????) mentioned "Mary Did You Know"........Check out Clay Aiken doing this on youtube.........fabulous.
Carol........The facility will have advice and ideas for immediate and future treatment and environment milieu for your DD.........best of luck. She should receive discharge planning that covers her and is fine-tuned to her needs.
Yanniejannie
PS pip........Lovely personalized tags!!!0 -
evening ladies~
well today went pretty fast got up at 4 am....DH is coming down with something~ 1-he usually doesnt get sick,2- and a few days before vacation....
went down to see DFIL this morning, he was snoozing in his wheelchair at the dining table... well I sat down with him and breakfast came, so I ordered him scrambled eggs and french toast, coffee ,milk and juice, so I fed him ,he was awake enough to eat,but kept his eyes closed.. then all of a sudden at 8:15 he opens his eyes and starts feeding himself, and patting my hand and chatting with me... he was kind of scruffy so took him down to his room and used the electric shaver on him, then settled him in the rec room and sat with him for a little bit,
I can tell the medication is moving out of his system, because he is getting more verbal.
told me how much he appreciated me called me grammie that is what he used to call his wife... .. I know he loves me and appreciates me.. spoke with his Dr, and he did confirm a mini stroke and advancing dementia,told him in no uncertain terms that we do not want him on Depakote anymore....
well we are supposed to have rainy yucky weather for the next few days .. I will take it, dont want the snow,,,,
Happy Birthday Terri xoxoxo
My ex is Bi-Polar and his mom had mental problems most of her adult life.. so I have seen it first hand also... I truly feel for u.0 -
Happy Monday everyone!
I have had a busy day! - Y from 6-8, chiropractor at 8:45, TOPS meeting 9:30-11:30, and retired teachers group luncheon at the Olive Garden at 12:00. I came home at 2:00, put on my jammies and made a cup of tea. Now I am enjoying Shirley in my lap and talking to you.
I have applied for a part time job at my Y. It looks promising and I am excited about it. Hope I can work it around DH's schedule and I can still have my mornings and lunch with hubby before I work. We can use a little extra money and I need to be more active. I love helping people and our Y has a large number of immigrants (like the kids I used to teach). I think this work would be good for me.
I lost 1.8 lbs this week - so just 3.2 more will make my December goal. HAPPY DANCE!
Beth - so glad you're enjoying the mixer.
Carol and Beth - My mother and one sister had mental illness. My grandson has anxiety disorder. You are in my prayers - as are all of you who are having family concerns.
Grandmallie - You are a precious DIL. I can tell by the way you talk about him that you and your FIL have a close bond.
Heather - My husband and I have a blended family and I gave up about Christmas plans with my "steps". They are all great people but it became so hard (and disappointing) to keep trying to work out a time for us all to be together. I know what you mean about your hubby not understanding your stress. Men just don't "get it" sometimes.l
Terri - I saw Frankie Valle in Nashville about 2 years ago - so much fun and he's still got it going!
Pip - cool tags!
Barbie - line dancing - YOU GO GIRL!
Sylvia - so glad your health is better. Your open house should be wonderful. I love both of the jokes!
Toni - signing off to fix some supper and feed the cat0 -
all three dance performances went great....the audiences enjoyed watching
Barbie 0 -
I am too totally excited about my new app for my phone. It is called "I Deserve a Donut." It is a spiritual approach to setting boundaries for healthy eating. You decide on boundaries that you can live with for the rest of your life (examples: eating only when hungry, eating a set number of times per day, eating a set number of points or calories, etc.) if you are tempted to go beyond a boundary, you choose the reason from a menu. The app gives you a set of questions to work through, Bible verses that address the situation, and sample answers to the questions and solutions to help you stay within your boundary. There is a book of the same name, but it and the app are the exact same thing. There is also a companion book that is a 30-day Bible Study. I got it as well.
Not trying to force religion on anyone, but i thought some of you might be interested. When I read the introduction to the Bible Study book, called Taste for Truth, I cried because she could have been describing my life,
I chose counting calories with MFP for my boundary. For the most part, I am also going to stick to 3 meals and one snack. I didn't choose that as my boundary because it would be too easy to overeat with portion sizes, etc. and lie to myself that I was getting the eating under control.
Anyway, thanks for reading. I'll keep you updated on how it is working for me.0 -
stats for the day:
Ride hm 2 gym- 13.53min 13amph 3mi
Spin- 40min 76ar 120aw 12-16g 15mi
ride gym 2 dome- 7.18min 11.5amph 1.5mi
ride dome 2 hm- 17.02 min, 9.5amph 2.7mi
thanks for the comments on my tags, i'm too excited for words.!0 -
I can never remember who wrote what so I will address what I can recall. My most favorite of all Minister of music I have had would always sing that every Christmas and I don't think any recording music star ever being better than his. We also had a lady who sang O Holy night every year. Even when she left Evansville she would come home every year to be with Mom and Dad for Christmas and would sing it for us. She now has MS like me only a lot worse and can no longer sing. But she lives her life as if she is singing her heart out with every thing she does. Allison, so glad your FIL is getting better. It seems like the nursing home is working better with you. Shows what good perseverence and excellent family advocacy can do for a nursing home patient, or even a hospital patient. Glad you got to meet with the doctor another time. Sorry hubbie isn't feeling well.
I also have history of dealing with a family member with mental illness. My MIL was paranoid schizophrenia. But it was in the era where shock treatments were the treatment of choice. I remember seeing the treatments while I was in nursing school. I am sure many of her brain cells were damaged or just totally zapped. Then she was put on very heavy tranquilized. In other words they made her so that she was a zombie. She was the oldest of 12 children and I think everyone abandoned her. It was difficult for me when I first met her. My husband didn't even want to introduce me to her but I told him that since she was OK during the years that he was home before the Navy, there was something worth knowing in her. With new medicines coming out she was more and more alert, had 3 more husbands, some of them abused her. She became quite a recluse. my husband and me and the 2nd son were the only ones that did anything to take care of her. at first he did it out of obligation, eventually it changed to love which doesn't come easy for my husband. I loved her from the beginning and like Allison it was a mutual feeling with us. I felt so bad that her own daughter didn't call or even see her. She once told me that she considered me more of a daughter. I had never felt more honored. My youngest brother has to sons and they both had severe mental illnesses throughout their childhood. ODD, ADD, ADHD, bipolar. The worst was the ODD, obsessive defiant disorder. I used to think they were jsut being 'brats' but it went way beyond that. The oldest son eventually grew out of it. He said that the moment his first child was born he knew he HAD to change and has really worked hard to be a good father. I just wish he would get a box of condoms and stop having kids and get married.
Well as usual I went on and on. Take care every one, Joyce, Indiana0
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