Cutting out Sugar and Sweets Need Help

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  • blktngldhrt
    blktngldhrt Posts: 1,053 Member
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    ndj1979 wrote: »
    did OP every come back in this thread?

    No. Probably scared away. :/
  • lemon629
    lemon629 Posts: 501 Member
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    ndj1979 wrote: »
    did OP every come back in this thread?

    No. Probably scared away. :/

    I agree. Plus hardly anyone actually gave her any advice, and what advice was given was buried by an absolutely ridiculous argument that had hardly anything to do with the original question.

    Why do threads on sugar have to get like this? The OP asked a simple question.
  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
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    lemon629 wrote: »
    ndj1979 wrote: »
    did OP every come back in this thread?

    No. Probably scared away. :/

    I agree. Plus hardly anyone actually gave her any advice, and what advice was given was buried by an absolutely ridiculous argument that had hardly anything to do with the original question.

    Why do threads on sugar have to get like this? The OP asked a simple question.

    Because both sides have to be right. Period. End of story. Doesn't matter what the actual thread is about, or if the thread is being helped at all. Both sides have to be right. Therefore they must keep arguing and name calling no matter what.
  • blktngldhrt
    blktngldhrt Posts: 1,053 Member
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    lemon629 wrote: »
    ndj1979 wrote: »
    did OP every come back in this thread?

    No. Probably scared away. :/

    I agree. Plus hardly anyone actually gave her any advice, and what advice was given was buried by an absolutely ridiculous argument that had hardly anything to do with the original question.

    Why do threads on sugar have to get like this? The OP asked a simple question.

    There's good advice before the argument. You don't have to cut out sugar, unless you have a medical problem. However, if you would like to, and think it's sustainable, you can. Adding fat in place of carbs and making sugar free desserts will help on cutting back.
  • JoKnowsJo
    JoKnowsJo Posts: 257 Member
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    dbmata wrote: »
    I replaced sugar with maple syrup.

    Ditto - I have added honey back in. I will just have to climb a few more stairs...I just looked at this again can't believe we are still debating - love it!

  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
    edited December 2014
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    dbmata wrote: »
    Kalikel wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    malibu927 wrote: »
    Honestly I would not cut them out, just factor them into your calorie allotment for the day.

    Yep. I always try to make room for some ice cream in my calories.

    Third. Unless there are medical reasons for cutting out sweets (diabetes namely) then there is no reason to not eat them. Know your goals, log what you are interested in eating, and if it fits your goals then eat it. If it doesn't then change the serving until it does, or just eat it tomorrow.

    If I didn't HAVE to give up sweets, I wouldn't have.

    But why you you believe you have to give them up? Is the reason due to a medical condition? Or do you just think that eating sweets = gain weight/not lose weight? Is this OP's reasoning as well?

    Because sweets don't cause or hinder weight loss; caloric surplus hinders weight loss, and caloric deficit causes weight loss. I've been eating sweets since before I started losing weight, I binged on sweets frequently too. Chocolate was my vice. Now? I know my caloric goals and I have no problem logging x amount of chocolate and just eating that. I ate chocolat etonight and sure, I'd be down for eating more, but I have no problem with not eating more of it because I know it doesn't fit my goals for today.

    So again, unless there are medical reasons, there is no 'have to' for cutting out any foods. I don't eat gluten, but this is because if I do eat it I have very bad digestive symptoms. So for me it's a "have to" situation. But eating the GF alternatives doesn't cause issues, so I eat those. Any food can be worked into one's diet and caloric goals if the person enjoys the food. I have had the "i can't eat this because I'll get fat" mindset, didn't work. Also had the "I can just exercise this off" mindset. That was back when I thought exercise = weight loss, though.

    I can't eat sweets. I would eat them, in moderation, if I could.

    But WHY do you think you cannot eat sweets? Is it because you have a medical condition? Or is it because you simply don't think that you can eat them within your caloric needs? If you are successfully able to eat every other type of food within your caloric goals then there is no real reason that you cannot try eating sweets within your goals. I went from eating 3-4 boxes of chocolate in a sitting to eating a few pieces, and the only difference is that I now actually understand my caloric goals and I don't put limits on anything (i.e. I don't say "I can only eat chips on special occasions/once a month/etc"). Where I once used to hate myself and feel guilty for eating chocolate because I would binge on it, I now can log two pieces without blinking an eye and just... eat it. I just enjoy food now. So there is no "can't" with food unless there are medical reasons behind this reasoning. It's really just about developing a healthy relationship with food, which will ideally enable you to enjoy food in moderation without resorting to binging.

    I know I can't..which is why I stated that I had to stop eating sweets. I know the difference between have to and choose to.

    I guess I needed to say "this" or "I agree" with the post I had quoted before posting the comment that lead to you questioning my reasons for knowing (not thinking..) I'm not able to do something.

    How do you know you can't though? You so far haven't given any reasons, which leads me to believe that it's more that you FEAR you can't eat sweets in moderation. Do you feel guilty when you eat sweets? Do you feel bad about yourself? I've been there. I felt ashamed because I almost always binged. I'd tell myself "just one piece" and then that turned into "just one bar" and then within the span of an hour I'd consumed 3-4 large chocolate bars. Or on saturdays, I work in retail and I used to buy an armful of chocoalte and eat it all on my shift. I wasn't even hungry. It was a combo of binging and a bad relationship with food that made me feel like *kitten* about myself. Once I got rid of the bad relationship with food and simply realized that no food will stop or prevent weight loss, I had no trouble working sweets into my daily caloric intake goals. If I don't have room for a whole candy bar, I will log and eat half. Or I'll have a small piece instead of the actual amount i'd like and I'll still be satisfied.

    Why do I need to give you a reason?
    You don't.
    +1 ana's posts are rather off putting, but perhaps she's still working through those food demons.
    (perhaps she's a budding undergrad psych major lol)

    and you wonder why people treat you like a troll. lol.

    Do they? Hmm. okay.

    I call em like I see em.

    As do you, yes?

    I'm not often intentionally harsh. I just find her approach, well, rather off putting.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
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    lemon629 wrote: »
    ndj1979 wrote: »
    did OP every come back in this thread?

    No. Probably scared away. :/

    I agree. Plus hardly anyone actually gave her any advice, and what advice was given was buried by an absolutely ridiculous argument that had hardly anything to do with the original question.

    Why do threads on sugar have to get like this? The OP asked a simple question.

    she never came back on page1 ..maybe she was just trolling for comments..
  • miketoryan
    miketoryan Posts: 41 Member
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    well, if you can't eat something in moderation, then cutting it out completely is probably the best choice.
  • JoKnowsJo
    JoKnowsJo Posts: 257 Member
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    miketoryan wrote: »
    well, if you can't eat something in moderation, then cutting it out completely is probably the best choice.
    Yes! However don't even use the "Mod......n" word that just gets it going again... ;)
  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
    edited December 2014
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    lemon629 wrote: »
    hardly anyone actually gave her any advice, and what advice was given was buried by an absolutely ridiculous argument that had hardly anything to do with the original question.

    Lots of people gave her advice or said they'd need to know more to give good advice. I was one. It's kind of rude to ask a question and then never come back or acknowledge the advice with even a thanks.

    (I admit the argument here was kind of overwhelming, but it was ignorable--I did!--and started somewhat after the first set of exchanges.)
  • ukaryote
    ukaryote Posts: 874 Member
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    I could use any kind of recommendations on how to cut out sweets and sodas.

    Most (not all) weight management is a head game. I can understand why it is difficult to do it in moderation, it is hard to stop once started. Changing behavior can be difficult.

    Questions first to find the triggers...

    1. Do you have some major stresses in your life or feel down much of the time? (I am not diagnosing anything. Feeling bad is a motivator to eat.)
    2. What is your main location to consume sweets and sodas? The office, home, out-and-about town?
    3. How do you obtain them? Buy them in the grocery with your other foods? Impulse buys at the checkout counter? Purposefully go to the store to get them?
    4. Are there any other people in the house who bring them home?
    5. Where do you keep treats at home? Other storage places like car, desk, purse?
  • dunnodunno
    dunnodunno Posts: 2,290 Member
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    lemurcat12 wrote: »
    lemon629 wrote: »
    hardly anyone actually gave her any advice, and what advice was given was buried by an absolutely ridiculous argument that had hardly anything to do with the original question.

    Lots of people gave her advice or said they'd need to know more to give good advice. I was one. It's kind of rude to ask a question and then never come back or acknowledge the advice with even a thanks.

    (I admit the argument here was kind of overwhelming, but it was ignorable--I did!--and started somewhat after the first set of exchanges.)

    Plus it was their first post.
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
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    lemon629 wrote: »
    ndj1979 wrote: »
    did OP every come back in this thread?

    No. Probably scared away. :/

    I agree. Plus hardly anyone actually gave her any advice, and what advice was given was buried by an absolutely ridiculous argument that had hardly anything to do with the original question.

    Why do threads on sugar have to get like this? The OP asked a simple question.
    Because it's a stupid discussion.

    and it's the internet.
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
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    tigersword wrote: »
    Kalikel wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    Kalikel wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    malibu927 wrote: »
    Honestly I would not cut them out, just factor them into your calorie allotment for the day.

    Yep. I always try to make room for some ice cream in my calories.

    Third. Unless there are medical reasons for cutting out sweets (diabetes namely) then there is no reason to not eat them. Know your goals, log what you are interested in eating, and if it fits your goals then eat it. If it doesn't then change the serving until it does, or just eat it tomorrow.

    If I didn't HAVE to give up sweets, I wouldn't have.

    But why you you believe you have to give them up? Is the reason due to a medical condition? Or do you just think that eating sweets = gain weight/not lose weight? Is this OP's reasoning as well?

    Because sweets don't cause or hinder weight loss; caloric surplus hinders weight loss, and caloric deficit causes weight loss. I've been eating sweets since before I started losing weight, I binged on sweets frequently too. Chocolate was my vice. Now? I know my caloric goals and I have no problem logging x amount of chocolate and just eating that. I ate chocolat etonight and sure, I'd be down for eating more, but I have no problem with not eating more of it because I know it doesn't fit my goals for today.

    So again, unless there are medical reasons, there is no 'have to' for cutting out any foods. I don't eat gluten, but this is because if I do eat it I have very bad digestive symptoms. So for me it's a "have to" situation. But eating the GF alternatives doesn't cause issues, so I eat those. Any food can be worked into one's diet and caloric goals if the person enjoys the food. I have had the "i can't eat this because I'll get fat" mindset, didn't work. Also had the "I can just exercise this off" mindset. That was back when I thought exercise = weight loss, though.

    I can't eat sweets. I would eat them, in moderation, if I could.

    But WHY do you think you cannot eat sweets? Is it because you have a medical condition? Or is it because you simply don't think that you can eat them within your caloric needs? If you are successfully able to eat every other type of food within your caloric goals then there is no real reason that you cannot try eating sweets within your goals. I went from eating 3-4 boxes of chocolate in a sitting to eating a few pieces, and the only difference is that I now actually understand my caloric goals and I don't put limits on anything (i.e. I don't say "I can only eat chips on special occasions/once a month/etc"). Where I once used to hate myself and feel guilty for eating chocolate because I would binge on it, I now can log two pieces without blinking an eye and just... eat it. I just enjoy food now. So there is no "can't" with food unless there are medical reasons behind this reasoning. It's really just about developing a healthy relationship with food, which will ideally enable you to enjoy food in moderation without resorting to binging.

    I know I can't..which is why I stated that I had to stop eating sweets. I know the difference between have to and choose to.

    I guess I needed to say "this" or "I agree" with the post I had quoted before posting the comment that lead to you questioning my reasons for knowing (not thinking..) I'm not able to do something.

    How do you know you can't though? You so far haven't given any reasons, which leads me to believe that it's more that you FEAR you can't eat sweets in moderation. Do you feel guilty when you eat sweets? Do you feel bad about yourself? I've been there. I felt ashamed because I almost always binged. I'd tell myself "just one piece" and then that turned into "just one bar" and then within the span of an hour I'd consumed 3-4 large chocolate bars. Or on saturdays, I work in retail and I used to buy an armful of chocoalte and eat it all on my shift. I wasn't even hungry. It was a combo of binging and a bad relationship with food that made me feel like *kitten* about myself. Once I got rid of the bad relationship with food and simply realized that no food will stop or prevent weight loss, I had no trouble working sweets into my daily caloric intake goals. If I don't have room for a whole candy bar, I will log and eat half. Or I'll have a small piece instead of the actual amount i'd like and I'll still be satisfied.

    Why do I need to give you a reason?
    You don't.
    +1 ana's posts are rather off putting, but perhaps she's still working through those food demons.
    (perhaps she's a budding undergrad psych major lol)

    I've tackled my food demons about 6 months ago actually. The only food demons I have now are when I have to decide whether I want to eat a donut or a muffin.

    And to throw around attempted insulting remarks regarding my educational vocation is quite childish. Yes, I am graduating with my pscyhology and art history degree next term, and afterwards my plan is to embark on an occupational therapy graduate degree. Does my educational and job interest somehow make my advice, opinions, and presence lesser than someone with a mathematics degree? Would someone with a fine arts degree also be looked down on in the same manner? It is quite sad for someone to look down on others because of their education.
    Stop the passive-aggressive insults.

    Stop the outright name-calling.

    Stop telling people how to post.

    Stop insisting that everyone diet according to your rules.


    Stop telling people how to source posts.

    Stop demanding that people answer whatever question you ask or get off the boards. (Honestly, who do you think you are, telling people they shouldn't be posting here?)
    IronyMeter1.gif

    +1

    +2
  • _Terrapin_
    _Terrapin_ Posts: 4,301 Member
    Options
    SLLRunner wrote: »
    tigersword wrote: »
    Kalikel wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    Kalikel wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    ana3067 wrote: »
    malibu927 wrote: »
    Honestly I would not cut them out, just factor them into your calorie allotment for the day.

    Yep. I always try to make room for some ice cream in my calories.

    Third. Unless there are medical reasons for cutting out sweets (diabetes namely) then there is no reason to not eat them. Know your goals, log what you are interested in eating, and if it fits your goals then eat it. If it doesn't then change the serving until it does, or just eat it tomorrow.

    If I didn't HAVE to give up sweets, I wouldn't have.

    But why you you believe you have to give them up? Is the reason due to a medical condition? Or do you just think that eating sweets = gain weight/not lose weight? Is this OP's reasoning as well?

    Because sweets don't cause or hinder weight loss; caloric surplus hinders weight loss, and caloric deficit causes weight loss. I've been eating sweets since before I started losing weight, I binged on sweets frequently too. Chocolate was my vice. Now? I know my caloric goals and I have no problem logging x amount of chocolate and just eating that. I ate chocolat etonight and sure, I'd be down for eating more, but I have no problem with not eating more of it because I know it doesn't fit my goals for today.

    So again, unless there are medical reasons, there is no 'have to' for cutting out any foods. I don't eat gluten, but this is because if I do eat it I have very bad digestive symptoms. So for me it's a "have to" situation. But eating the GF alternatives doesn't cause issues, so I eat those. Any food can be worked into one's diet and caloric goals if the person enjoys the food. I have had the "i can't eat this because I'll get fat" mindset, didn't work. Also had the "I can just exercise this off" mindset. That was back when I thought exercise = weight loss, though.

    I can't eat sweets. I would eat them, in moderation, if I could.

    But WHY do you think you cannot eat sweets? Is it because you have a medical condition? Or is it because you simply don't think that you can eat them within your caloric needs? If you are successfully able to eat every other type of food within your caloric goals then there is no real reason that you cannot try eating sweets within your goals. I went from eating 3-4 boxes of chocolate in a sitting to eating a few pieces, and the only difference is that I now actually understand my caloric goals and I don't put limits on anything (i.e. I don't say "I can only eat chips on special occasions/once a month/etc"). Where I once used to hate myself and feel guilty for eating chocolate because I would binge on it, I now can log two pieces without blinking an eye and just... eat it. I just enjoy food now. So there is no "can't" with food unless there are medical reasons behind this reasoning. It's really just about developing a healthy relationship with food, which will ideally enable you to enjoy food in moderation without resorting to binging.

    I know I can't..which is why I stated that I had to stop eating sweets. I know the difference between have to and choose to.

    I guess I needed to say "this" or "I agree" with the post I had quoted before posting the comment that lead to you questioning my reasons for knowing (not thinking..) I'm not able to do something.

    How do you know you can't though? You so far haven't given any reasons, which leads me to believe that it's more that you FEAR you can't eat sweets in moderation. Do you feel guilty when you eat sweets? Do you feel bad about yourself? I've been there. I felt ashamed because I almost always binged. I'd tell myself "just one piece" and then that turned into "just one bar" and then within the span of an hour I'd consumed 3-4 large chocolate bars. Or on saturdays, I work in retail and I used to buy an armful of chocoalte and eat it all on my shift. I wasn't even hungry. It was a combo of binging and a bad relationship with food that made me feel like *kitten* about myself. Once I got rid of the bad relationship with food and simply realized that no food will stop or prevent weight loss, I had no trouble working sweets into my daily caloric intake goals. If I don't have room for a whole candy bar, I will log and eat half. Or I'll have a small piece instead of the actual amount i'd like and I'll still be satisfied.

    Why do I need to give you a reason?
    You don't.
    +1 ana's posts are rather off putting, but perhaps she's still working through those food demons.
    (perhaps she's a budding undergrad psych major lol)

    I've tackled my food demons about 6 months ago actually. The only food demons I have now are when I have to decide whether I want to eat a donut or a muffin.

    And to throw around attempted insulting remarks regarding my educational vocation is quite childish. Yes, I am graduating with my pscyhology and art history degree next term, and afterwards my plan is to embark on an occupational therapy graduate degree. Does my educational and job interest somehow make my advice, opinions, and presence lesser than someone with a mathematics degree? Would someone with a fine arts degree also be looked down on in the same manner? It is quite sad for someone to look down on others because of their education.
    Stop the passive-aggressive insults.

    Stop the outright name-calling.

    Stop telling people how to post.

    Stop insisting that everyone diet according to your rules.


    Stop telling people how to source posts.

    Stop demanding that people answer whatever question you ask or get off the boards. (Honestly, who do you think you are, telling people they shouldn't be posting here?)
    IronyMeter1.gif

    +1

    +2

    +3

  • Lourdesong
    Lourdesong Posts: 1,492 Member
    Options
    Lourdesong wrote: »
    I guess I find it a little annoying when some posters assume that their desire to binge and pig out on the foods they find palatable is "super special unique." As if most people don't have the same desire to consume their most favorites to excess.

    You are right -- many people think their desire to pig out is unique, when it isn't. Bingers especially feel they are unique because when they say "I can't stop eating" they are told "just eat in moderation!" and when they try to eat in moderation, and fail, they feel like everyone else can do it but them. The advice "just eat in moderation" actually creates the environment that makes them feel special.

    And Ana and you are right in that many people demonize a certain food they love, and end up in a struggle with it, when if they just accepted it, they could have a normal relationship to it.

    For people like me, the binging cycle is both so short (binging every or every other day) and so fierce (binging on 4,000 - 6,000 calories at a time) that I could never escape the food fog (comatose on the couch, mind not sharp) enough to have the time to develop the healthy relationship with food that you and Ana are talking about.

    If, when I was binging, I tried your method and limited my snacking to fitting within my calories, I would either 1. snap and binge, or 2. be viciously angry until I did get to binge. I do remember my shortest diet -- 2 hours before I cracked. And LA Weight Loss? I was supposed to eat 2 candy bars a day. I ate the entire box of candy bars -- a month's worth -- in a week, even though I was also eating a nutritious breakfast, lunch, and dinner. The candy bars were supposed to be the moderation part.

    After I eliminated the desserts, I was finally able to develop a healthy relationship with food. Instead of being afraid of the kitchen and hating grocery shopping, I learned to cook and to shop. I learned what a serving size actually looks like. I learned what a balanced meal looks like, and I learned how much I loved vegetables, which I always thought I hated. I learned to say no to overeating, no matter how tasty the last 2 inches of that sub or steak might be.

    It's quite possible that I could do the same with desserts. You may be absolutely right, I could have one or two bites of pumpkin pie and be quite capable of pushing the plate away.

    However, two things make me pause. One, I've had a spoonful of this or that over the years. My husband is an inventive baker, and he makes interesting pies all the time. I've tasted the more unusual ones, and the second that pie hits my mouth, I feel all kinds of *kitten* start happening in my tastebuds, my saliva glands, and my brain that doesn't happen that quickly and that strongly with any other food.

    The second thing that makes me pause is my history with dessert. I was once at a point where I would throw cookies away, then fish them out of the garbage and eat them. I don't ever want to go back to that shame and humiliation.

    I really really really appreciate the point you and Ana are making about developing a healthy relationship with food, but not everyone's healthy relationship looks the same. For some people, eating all foods in moderation is a healthy relationship with food. For me, eliminating desserts is what allowed me to finally have a healthy relationship with food.

    I've been away since I last posted in this thread, and am catching up on this thread today. Apologies in advance for bringing this thread back up, but I did want to respond to this.^^^

    I've seen your posts a number of times, Deirdre, and while I don't expect you to intuitively know my own personal struggles with binging, I do feel like your posts often implicitly dismiss my history and my struggles due to the fact that I now practice moderation, and that therefore, I must be totally different and have had totally less severe food issues than you.

    And, I find that implicit dismissal kind of annoying. Like you've drawn a line between yourself and those you consider to be people like me, and on your side is "real problems" and "real issues" and "real struggles", and on my side is just the grace and blessings of the Almighty.

    You take great pains to paint as vivid of a picture as possible of your food and binging issues in your posts, and it appears to me like an attempt to separate yourself from others, like you desire everyone to believe that you're some kind of anomaly of the human race. I find it difficult to believe you are an anomaly, especially when I don't think the picture you paint of your struggles is all that unique or extraordinary.

    Your strategy of elimination is just that, a strategy. It's not in any way a sign you have a healthy relationship with food or that you desire to have a healthy relationship. You clearly believe you can't, that it's not possible because you're an anomaly, there's some payoff you're getting out of believing that. And your belief about yourself implicitly dismisses the struggles of others who are really not that different from you.