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I grant then ruin someone's wish...

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Replies

  • saragd012
    saragd012 Posts: 693 Member
    Granted, but now they think you're the catty witch of the office.

    I wish I could afford to go back to school full time
  • jenjencin78
    jenjencin78 Posts: 4,415 Member
    Granted, but now they think you're the catty witch of the office.

    I wish I could afford to go back to school full time

    I'm fine with that haha!

    Granted but then you'll have to work two jobs to pay the loans...oh wait...lol

    I wish I could eat alllll the chocolate and not gain weight :)
  • NotTheGuyYouAreLookingFor
    NotTheGuyYouAreLookingFor Posts: 1,623 Member

    Granted, But then you are cursed with unpredictable and explosive diarrhea...

    I wish I was healthy and fit.
  • Arathels
    Arathels Posts: 6,883 Member
    Granted but you can never eat any kind of animal products ever again.

    I wish I was more flexible.
  • zcb94
    zcb94 Posts: 3,678 Member
    Granted but only for the next half hour.
    I wish depression wasn't a thing. :(
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Granted

    And I am gonna disappoint the point of this game by saying that I wish for the same!
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Granted

    And I am gonna disappoint the point of this game by saying that I wish for the same!

    Granted, depression is now not a thing. But REPRESSION is an even more pervasive thing which turns everyone into a ticking time bomb of guilt, fear, and self-doubt resulting in a society of shut-ins and loners until it reaches a critical mass and we end up in the world from The Purge. Depressing isn't it?

    I wish peanut butter didn't stick to the roof of my mouth.
  • handyrunner
    handyrunner Posts: 32,662 Member
    Granted it now sticks in exit from the body


    I wish I didn't spill stuff on my shirt when eating
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Granted. Food never exits your mouth which means it doesn't go down your esophagus which means you starve to death with a full 7-course dinner lodged in your grotesquely stretched out maw.

    But your shirt is spotless.

    I wish I had an after dinner mint to hand you.
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Granted, however mint makes me homicidal!


    I wish i could get rid of this belly fat
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Granted, however mint makes me homicidal!


    I wish i could get rid of this belly fat

    Granted. Your belly fat melts like wax from your midsection and collects and hardens around your ankles. You now own the largest cankles humanity has ever seen but you make a mint (see what I did there) touring the country as the elephant footed woman.

    I wish I could stop picturing cankles.
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    edited March 2017
    Granted, but now you have romantic dreams of elephant ladies

    I wish I had a maid
  • xsmilexforxmex
    xsmilexforxmex Posts: 1,216 Member
    Granted, but now you have romantic dreams of elephant ladies

    I wish I had a maid

    Granted, but she steals everything one day while you're gone.

    I wish I could run a 7 minute mile.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Granted. You have a meter maid who follows you around wherever you go placing tickets on your car every time you leave it. You resort to spending more and more time in your car until you become that creepy woman who lives in her van down by the river.

    I wish I remembered my lunch.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Granted, but now you have romantic dreams of elephant ladies

    I wish I had a maid

    Granted, but she steals everything one day while you're gone.

    I wish I could run a 7 minute mile.

    Granted. You run a 7-minute mile but you've forgotten how to stop. You keep running until you grind your legs down to stubs but your pace is steady as a metronome. People call you 7-minute Stumpy for as long as you have remaining to live.

    I wish you'd stop running because the trail behind is gross.
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Granted but its been warm and you forgot to refrigerate it and got botulism


    I wish I could get my arsse moving today!
  • ShrinkingViolet1982
    ShrinkingViolet1982 Posts: 919 Member
    Granted, but it moves without you and leaves you behind. *sad*

    I wish I could have a whole bag of jelly beans.
  • handyrunner
    handyrunner Posts: 32,662 Member
    Granted but they are all licorice

    I wish I could have multi colored jelly beans
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Granted but they are all licorice

    I wish I could have multi colored jelly beans

    Granted but now you're color blind and see only shades of grey. You actually stop to count the shades and end up with 50 which inspires you to write a book about jellybeans but you get sued by that other writer. Oh and they're all licorice too.

    I wish I could nap on command.
  • ShrinkingViolet1982
    ShrinkingViolet1982 Posts: 919 Member
    Granted but they are all licorice

    I wish I could have multi colored jelly beans

    You know me so well. *yuck*
  • handyrunner
    handyrunner Posts: 32,662 Member
    jaymvita wrote: »
    Granted but they are all licorice

    I wish I could have multi colored jelly beans

    Granted but now you're color blind and see only shades of grey. You actually stop to count the shades and end up with 50 which inspires you to write a book about jellybeans but you get sued by that other writer. Oh and they're all licorice too.

    I wish I could nap on command.

    But I staid with the BDSM theme
    Granted but they are all licorice

    I wish I could have multi colored jelly beans

    You know me so well. *yuck*

    I took a wild guess lol

    You can nap on command but you don't know the command everyone else does


    I wish I was more alert
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Granted, but now you see Dead People


    I wish I had more energy
  • handyrunner
    handyrunner Posts: 32,662 Member
    Granted your the Hoover dam

    I wish I could invent the next greastest thing
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Granted, but you become filthy Rich and your wife and her lover conspire to murder you for your riches!


    I wish I had at least a million dollars
  • handyrunner
    handyrunner Posts: 32,662 Member
    Granted, but you become filthy Rich and your wife and her lover conspire to murder you for your riches!


    I wish I had at least a million dollars

    Didn't Shakespeare's cover this

    You get million dollars but it's Monopoly money

    I wished I owned boardwalk
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    Granted. But your clumsy thumbs allow you to make the next GREASIEST thing. And it's disgusting. You reek of used grease forever after and your BDSM exploits become very limited to fry cooks and grease trap cleaners.

    I wish I could conjure up the stolen data tapes.
  • coolraul07
    coolraul07 Posts: 1,606 Member
    jaymvita wrote: »
    ...
    I wish I could conjure up the stolen data tapes.
    Granted, but they all contain indisputable evidence of you running a sex slavery operation.

    I wish that I could eliminate hypocrisy in politicians and make them abide by The Golden Rule.
  • zcb94
    zcb94 Posts: 3,678 Member
    Okay, but now everyone is so nice that nothing actually gets done.
    I wish my glucometer would actually work and reflect how I feel instead of always reading high when I'm actually low.
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    edited September 2017
    Granted, but now when it reads High, it means you are Actually "High" as in Stoned, loaded, half baked :lol:

    I wish I had another chance with he whom I Love
  • Arizona_C
    Arizona_C Posts: 1,476 Member
    Granted. But it would end in exactly the same way

    I wish I wouldn't have to work those insane night shifts
This discussion has been closed.