We broke up because...
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You got laid. off0
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She accused me of getting laid...0
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You didn't bring home the bacon0
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He bought home crotch crickets
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She left me for some guy that plays Cricket!0
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She left me for herself but stayed too.0
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He was soooo confusing!0
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Lol...way to fabulous ..I can't compete0
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Thought she was Pat Benetar and Our Love was a battlefield!0
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Made too many obscure references0
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He was always on his phone.0
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I didn't like the videos of other women on his phone0
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he wouldn't workout with me0
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I was to awesome and she could not handle it.0
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Always wanted to have "most awesome" contests. so tiring.0
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I met her in the gym and asked her out , and the first 4 months were amazing , but then she kept telling me i could not go to the gym unless she was with me at all times .0
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he told me he would leave me if i got any bigger0
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i couldnt pronounce his user name!!!!!
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He made up his own language because he had a Vowel Phobia!0
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Hated my Wisconsin Accent Aye!!!0
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Catfished by a guy.0
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That Body art is all done by Sharpie!0
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Kept trying to get me to ban dihydrogen monoxide.0
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Kept tempting me with unhealthy food0
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Hated my Home Cooking!0
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I found out the soylent green she was cooking was made from people.0
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the duck came between us 0
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Didnt approve of Cannibalism!0
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Coz she slept with her glasses on0
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He slept all the time..no fun in the bedroom0
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