We broke up because...
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Claimed she was Wonder Woman when we all know it's me!
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She wanted a super woman..alas I was not
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She was more than Super, more like Spectacular and I wasn't good enough!0
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She made me pretend to be batman0
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He wasn't into role play0
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He was more like Alfred
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I had a jaded psycho Troll after me that chased her away!0
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Ahhh..he was mean .. .. 0
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He didn't like me eating rats and their placentas0
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I wasn't attracted to "Kittens"0
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Her kitten reminded me of the song memories
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He couldn't remember what to do at sexy time 0
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She was no longer attracted to my uncanny ability to marathon-watch Portlandia reruns...0
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Stinky feet..you could smell those things from a mile away ..0
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Didn't appreciate my love of all things equine.0
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Wolf whistled all the girls in the neighborhood0
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He pushed me off the boat and laughed because I can't swim0
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She drowned
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Only wanted me down under0
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Never wanted to be on top0
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Top, bottom got tired of keeping track!1
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she kept track of me too much
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Had a hard time staying on track.0
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She was from the wrong side of the tracks0
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She shot at me while collecting arrows from the target0
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had a one track mind.....0
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Was paranoid I was trying to kill him ..0
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Had lost his mind.0
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She didn't know who Howard Hill was0
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He liked some guy named Howard better!0
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