We broke up because...

Buckyz22

she kept calling me Howard when my name is Don

let_me_clip_dirty_wings

I was a neat freak and she was a dirty freak...

Archer2017

Didn't appreciate my dirty freak tendencies.

let_me_clip_dirty_wings

Failed to understand that I appreciate less talk and more action...

Archer2017

Kept me muzzled so I wouldn't talk.

let_me_clip_dirty_wings

We had different interpretations of the word "muzzle"...

slimgirljo15

Liked being on a leash..too freaky for me..

shortgirlsneedlovetoo

Called me a freak

Archer2017

Didn't understand my desire to illustrate how I interpret the word freak.

let_me_clip_dirty_wings

She's a little too sensitive

slimgirljo15

I was the wrong sex

Taylor076097

She never understood I was a lesbian

FabulousFantasticFifty

Our sex was ooooh soooo wrong!

slimgirljo15

I just didn't float her boat physically

Taylor076097

Tragic boating accident

slimgirljo15

She tried to kill me..pushed me off a boat

FabulousFantasticFifty

She "accidentally" knocked me out of the boat knowing I couldn't swim!

Taylor076097

I offered a life jacket. She wasn't playful at all..

slimgirljo15

I know she was trying to kill me ..she threw the lifejacket 100m in front of me knowing I can't swim

Linlou125

I gave her swim lessons but she was a slow learner

slimgirljo15

Put her foot on my head to keep my face underwater

*glub gurgle*

DSwales11

Oh, so that's where she learned that move.

FabulousFantasticFifty

Didn't like bathing with me!

Linlou125

I used the wrong soap in the shower

keith0373

She made me shower in the dark

FabulousFantasticFifty

He was always watching me but in a creepy way like he was hungry

slimgirljo15

Wouldn't share his shower

Taylor076097

She wanted to shower with other people

Archer2017

She never took a shower

let_me_clip_dirty_wings

Only took golden showers