We broke up because...

A_MariposaDream

He never saw me as his true love

let_me_clip_dirty_wings

We often confused true love with true like...

A_MariposaDream

Never made me feel wanted

mellecita

She gave me store-bought refrigerated meatballs for Valentine's Day.

Unknown

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Nitroalley2

She ate all my chocolate on valentines day and would not share

Karie2017

he acts like a drill sergeant

A_MariposaDream

Never let me have the neighbors dog to call my own

Unknown

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A_MariposaDream

Didn't understand I was trying to get him turned on!

Nitroalley2

She was turning on all the neighbors. I had to hide the Tequila!

Karie2017

He hid all the alcohol

brianapc

She never laughed at the same memes I did

subcounter

she called gif's jif's.

let_me_clip_dirty_wings

She never let me play baseball. I never got to 1st base, 2nd base, 3rd base, etc...

Nitroalley2

She was too religious & prayed to the porcelain throne every other night

A_MariposaDream

He was late for a dinner date with my ex!

subcounter

she said the cookies i baked for her tasted like grass.

brianapc

subcounter wrote: »

she called gif's jif's.

Easy mistake .. I just really like peanut butter okay??

Unknown

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A_MariposaDream

He killed my dog

subcounter

i had to cuddle her ex's dog, then her ex, and only then him

let_me_clip_dirty_wings

She ate my hot dog

A_MariposaDream

Never let me shave his face

Unknown

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A_MariposaDream

He would kiss my nose and tells me I have to earn a real kiss!

Unknown

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brianapc

He kept dropping these creative pickup lines on other women

subcounter

she finished all my Peanut butter, and left for someone that has more.

brianapc

He liked jelly wayyyy too much