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We broke up because...
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She called my Mama a Mummy and got kicked out of the Family reunion0
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She found his boxers0
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I found boxers at his place and he only wore Tighty Whities
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She was always putting her hands in other men's underwear0
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He hated that I was a Urologist0
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She enjoyed "examining" her patients0
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She didn't let me go all the way0
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she didn't like 80's music0
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He broke me1
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he was too fragile1
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Bent me like a pretzel0
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He wasn't flexible0
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She didn't like my flexibility0
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She kept sailing away0
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Came home with lipstick on his collar0
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He insisted That i shower fully clothed0
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kept bringing sandwiches to the bathroom0
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She cursed like a Sailor0
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She preferred boys ..like our pool boy0
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kept trying to clean my mouth out with soap0
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She was a drunken sailor0
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Kept knitting my underwear closed0
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wouldn't keep his knitted underwear on0
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Kept tying me up with her underwear0
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kept ripping them0
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Wanted to always have me rip her unmentionables0
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