We broke up because...

projectsix

We didn't.

RunHardBeStrong

He is still in my closet.

Note to self: feed and walk Brad when you get home.

Timshel_

She couldn't take compliments after being disfigured chasing parked cars drunk.

slimgirljo15

Never happened..he loves me

RunHardBeStrong

She was always in denial

FabulousFantasticFifty

Her kisses were too sloppy

Timshel_

Hates that I like it sloppy

A_MariposaDream

Why did I not know we are dating damn it

FabulousFantasticFifty

Called me Sloppy Seconds

iTim__

Didn't realize the term seconds wasn't​ referring to the order, but to the amount of time it takes.

Timshel_

Too much Tim for me.

mrwineismybf

Takes seconds off my life daily

A_MariposaDream

Because he would tell me he always wanted a daughter

FabulousFantasticFifty

She wouldn't give me Children

mrwineismybf

I gave her my heart and it still wasn't enough

FireTurtle75

She didn't have a heart anymore.

Pid57

He liked to sit in the dark.

RunHardBeStrong

Never turned the lights off. 24/7 they were on. I couldn't afford the light bill anymore.

FireTurtle75

Couldn't overcome the shocking bill she had.

iTim__

He was a spitfire.

FabulousFantasticFifty

He couldn't handle the heat

Muscle_for_Fitness

Wore a coat all year even when it was a 100 degrees

RunHardBeStrong

She poured jalapeño juice in my panties.. Then asked if I could feel the heat.

iTim__

She was too hot to handle -- and she didn't like my oven mits.

FabulousFantasticFifty

She was too hot to handle

Unknown

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FabulousFantasticFifty

Told everyone that I had ice running through my veins

RunHardBeStrong

She was so cold, I had her cremated.

slimgirljo15

Set fire to her ex..she's now in jail

iTim__

She made me wear sweats and rubbed my leg until I popped a tent in my sweat pants.