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Online Dating

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  • Belle8312
    Belle8312 Posts: 2,151 Member
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    tchell99 wrote: »
    Didn't meet online (this was when I was in college in the ealry 90s), but started dating a guy I worked with at a restaurant over a school break while living back home. He seemed kinda obsessed with his ex gf and had other indications of instability, so I was happy to return to school 3 states away after a few weeks and chalk it up to a fling. Then I started getting collect calls...from jail. [Um, does anyone know how freaking expensive those are, especially for a college student?] He'd been arrested for harassing his ex (I never really got the details on exact charges, but I suspect battery and maybe assault) and wanted me to bail him out. He thought sending me a polaroid of him in his jail uniform would sway me. Nope. I cut off contact after two calls (what can I say, I felt bad at first, but then my sense kicked in).

    So then he started calling my Mom! She actually went down and put some $ in his commissary account. Luckily she saw the light once I told her some more details.

    That reminds me of someone's profile I read last night on OKC.....it said something like, I am currently writing you from whatever state prison and am sentenced for another 6 months. I got arrested for violating probation, blah, blah, blah, I am reformed and have found God, blah, blah, blah. And he further said that his friend suggested he sign up for it so he'll have someone to date when he gets out.
  • shajenkins88
    shajenkins88 Posts: 18 Member
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    Don't trust online dating
  • tchell99
    tchell99 Posts: 434 Member
    edited February 2015
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    Oh, I almost forgot the guy who stated outright that he saw no reason to *ever* pick up the tab, particularly for online dates, since too many women "expect" it. I certainly don't expect it - I really don't like feeling I owe anyone anything, so I always pay for myself unless they are really insistent and I don't want to make a big issue about it. And I abhor that some women see free drinks and meals as a dating entitlement. But then he started telling me stories of his various recent sexual exploits and then asked if I'd like to go get the next round. I said no thanks, I think one'll do me, polished off my drink, and left.

    Note: I did not leave him with the tab. I'd already bought my own drink at the bar before I sat down.
  • mscheftg
    mscheftg Posts: 485 Member
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    mamasage wrote: »
    I've had my share of doozies but I think the worst was the guy who ordered mass amounts of cocktails and sushi, waiting until the end to inform me that he didn't have any money on him to contribute, and also, had spent the past eight years between a mental institution and jail. Then he asked "Can I come to your house and see where you sleep?"
    Ummmm. I'm gonna go with "no" on that one...

    I hope you took the long complicated way home!
  • Noelv1976
    Noelv1976 Posts: 18,948 Member
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    I still do it
  • Lindsay_the_great
    Lindsay_the_great Posts: 209 Member
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    I met the love of my life online. Before him I had met so many creeps and weirdos and philanderers that my profile had evolved to be very blunt and to the point about what I expected and was willing to put up with. Eventually I had enough. I went on one day after one too many creepy messages intending to delete my profile. Just as I was about to click the "delete" button a message popped up. It said, "Your profile reads like a manifesto."

    ...so four years later I married him.
  • RandomA1
    RandomA1 Posts: 19 Member
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    LuvPosh wrote: »
    All of them, it usually starts with arriving and a male has yet again over estimated their height!

    One of my big pet peeves since I'm pretty tall as it is. Now, I just assume that they're 2 inches shorter than they listed and I'm usually right lol! Though the last guy I dated had a height listed that was about 1-2 inches shorter than his actual height.

  • RandomA1
    RandomA1 Posts: 19 Member
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    Belle8312 wrote: »
    heathbilly wrote: »
    lol some damn , these are some horrible stories.

    Yeah, but I have heard some good ones. I only know 1 person that has had good luck, but you never know until you go out there and try.

    I just get frustrated at the amount of people I message and then don't get a response back. I actually spend time reading the profiles and message with something related to that...for example, found a guy a few days ago, good looking, seems nice, we "match" and he spent two weeks in Italy last year, posted pictures, talked about how he loved to travel, etc. I lived in Italy for four years, so I messaged him about what a beautiful country it was, how I liked some of his pics from the trip (I swear, it wasn't creepy), asked what country he wanted to travel to next, etc. Not one comment back.

    Frustrating.

    Very frustrating. I rarely message guys but when I do, this always seems to happen (even when they've "matched" me). It's not really like they're out of my league or anything either. I understand that guys have their own preferences but you would think that the odds of them answering would be pretty good since 90% of the guys I message already matched me.
  • stephaniels0416
    stephaniels0416 Posts: 38 Member
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    RandomA1 wrote: »
    LuvPosh wrote: »
    All of them, it usually starts with arriving and a male has yet again over estimated their height!

    One of my big pet peeves since I'm pretty tall as it is. Now, I just assume that they're 2 inches shorter than they listed and I'm usually right lol! Though the last guy I dated had a height listed that was about 1-2 inches shorter than his actual height.

    I have this problem too. I'm 5'9", so height is important. Even if a guy says it doesn't matter that I'm taller, it doesn't take long before I hear, "too bad you're not just an inch or two shorter". So, my minimum is 5'10" and hope they only exaggerated by an inch.
  • wolfsbayne
    wolfsbayne Posts: 3,116 Member
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    RandomA1 wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    heathbilly wrote: »
    lol some damn , these are some horrible stories.

    Yeah, but I have heard some good ones. I only know 1 person that has had good luck, but you never know until you go out there and try.

    I just get frustrated at the amount of people I message and then don't get a response back. I actually spend time reading the profiles and message with something related to that...for example, found a guy a few days ago, good looking, seems nice, we "match" and he spent two weeks in Italy last year, posted pictures, talked about how he loved to travel, etc. I lived in Italy for four years, so I messaged him about what a beautiful country it was, how I liked some of his pics from the trip (I swear, it wasn't creepy), asked what country he wanted to travel to next, etc. Not one comment back.

    Frustrating.

    Very frustrating. I rarely message guys but when I do, this always seems to happen (even when they've "matched" me). It's not really like they're out of my league or anything either. I understand that guys have their own preferences but you would think that the odds of them answering would be pretty good since 90% of the guys I message already matched me.


    I'm guessing it's equally frustrating for the guys who don't receive messages back.

  • RandomA1
    RandomA1 Posts: 19 Member
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    Joannah700 wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    It wasn't a 'date'... but I have met up with a guy through Tinder. Luckily he looked exactly the same and had the same personality as he did online. I was 18 and he was 32- we got what we wanted out of it. I probably wouldn't do it again though. I was safe with this guy, but I don't want to ever chance it again.

    Is there anyone on Tinder that's actually looking for a real life relationship? From what I've gathered, it's all about hookups.

    No. You can date with Tinder. My little sister tried Tinder and met a rocket scientist. Seriously, a rocket scientist. He worked for Space X. She went to their Christmas party and had an awesome time.

    I think it depends on what you're looking for.

    I agree. My old coworker convinced me to try Tinder last year since a few of her friends had success finding relationships with it. I've used it on and off and met up with a guy from it 1 time. The date went ok but there wasn't a spark. I found Tinder to not be right for me because I'm definitely looking for a relationship and a large majority of the guys were looking for hookups or casual dating at most. It's definitely a confidence booster though lol. I had a lot of matches on it and most of them were pretty hot.
  • RandomA1
    RandomA1 Posts: 19 Member
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    wolfsbayne wrote: »
    RandomA1 wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    heathbilly wrote: »
    lol some damn , these are some horrible stories.

    Yeah, but I have heard some good ones. I only know 1 person that has had good luck, but you never know until you go out there and try.

    I just get frustrated at the amount of people I message and then don't get a response back. I actually spend time reading the profiles and message with something related to that...for example, found a guy a few days ago, good looking, seems nice, we "match" and he spent two weeks in Italy last year, posted pictures, talked about how he loved to travel, etc. I lived in Italy for four years, so I messaged him about what a beautiful country it was, how I liked some of his pics from the trip (I swear, it wasn't creepy), asked what country he wanted to travel to next, etc. Not one comment back.

    Frustrating.

    Very frustrating. I rarely message guys but when I do, this always seems to happen (even when they've "matched" me). It's not really like they're out of my league or anything either. I understand that guys have their own preferences but you would think that the odds of them answering would be pretty good since 90% of the guys I message already matched me.


    I'm guessing it's equally frustrating for the guys who don't receive messages back.

    Oh yes, it's 10 times for guys for sure so I shouldn't complain too much. I don't think I'd be able to do online dating if I was a guy because I don't think I'd be able to deal with the lack of replies.
  • wolfsbayne
    wolfsbayne Posts: 3,116 Member
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    RandomA1 wrote: »
    wolfsbayne wrote: »
    RandomA1 wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    heathbilly wrote: »
    lol some damn , these are some horrible stories.

    Yeah, but I have heard some good ones. I only know 1 person that has had good luck, but you never know until you go out there and try.

    I just get frustrated at the amount of people I message and then don't get a response back. I actually spend time reading the profiles and message with something related to that...for example, found a guy a few days ago, good looking, seems nice, we "match" and he spent two weeks in Italy last year, posted pictures, talked about how he loved to travel, etc. I lived in Italy for four years, so I messaged him about what a beautiful country it was, how I liked some of his pics from the trip (I swear, it wasn't creepy), asked what country he wanted to travel to next, etc. Not one comment back.

    Frustrating.

    Very frustrating. I rarely message guys but when I do, this always seems to happen (even when they've "matched" me). It's not really like they're out of my league or anything either. I understand that guys have their own preferences but you would think that the odds of them answering would be pretty good since 90% of the guys I message already matched me.


    I'm guessing it's equally frustrating for the guys who don't receive messages back.

    Oh yes, it's 10 times for guys for sure so I shouldn't complain too much. I don't think I'd be able to do online dating if I was a guy because I don't think I'd be able to deal with the lack of replies.

    I try to reply to all of them, but sometimes when you say you're not interested, it doesn't stick. So, after replying twice that I'm not interested, if they are persistent, I stop replying.

  • Noelv1976
    Noelv1976 Posts: 18,948 Member
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    wolfsbayne wrote: »
    RandomA1 wrote: »
    wolfsbayne wrote: »
    RandomA1 wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    heathbilly wrote: »
    lol some damn , these are some horrible stories.

    Yeah, but I have heard some good ones. I only know 1 person that has had good luck, but you never know until you go out there and try.

    I just get frustrated at the amount of people I message and then don't get a response back. I actually spend time reading the profiles and message with something related to that...for example, found a guy a few days ago, good looking, seems nice, we "match" and he spent two weeks in Italy last year, posted pictures, talked about how he loved to travel, etc. I lived in Italy for four years, so I messaged him about what a beautiful country it was, how I liked some of his pics from the trip (I swear, it wasn't creepy), asked what country he wanted to travel to next, etc. Not one comment back.

    Frustrating.

    Very frustrating. I rarely message guys but when I do, this always seems to happen (even when they've "matched" me). It's not really like they're out of my league or anything either. I understand that guys have their own preferences but you would think that the odds of them answering would be pretty good since 90% of the guys I message already matched me.


    I'm guessing it's equally frustrating for the guys who don't receive messages back.

    Oh yes, it's 10 times for guys for sure so I shouldn't complain too much. I don't think I'd be able to do online dating if I was a guy because I don't think I'd be able to deal with the lack of replies.

    I try to reply to all of them, but sometimes when you say you're not interested, it doesn't stick. So, after replying twice that I'm not interested, if they are persistent, I stop replying.
    We're slow sometimes.
  • zaxx1953
    zaxx1953 Posts: 389 Member
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    Are people over like 25 actually on Tinder?

    I thought it was a bunch of college kids trying to hook up basically/.

    I am really glad not to be that into social media outside Twitter; it's a scary scary world of desperation and sadness, lol.
  • carlsonrobb
    carlsonrobb Posts: 914 Member
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    This is the greatest thread up!!! I read it from start to finish!! Love the stories!! Please don't let this thread die!!!
  • jazzy550
    jazzy550 Posts: 264 Member
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    Online dating is creepy! And it don't matter if it's a paid site or free. I was on for a while couldn't believe the lies and the crazy nuts I met! Most of them stay online forever as they can always find someone to give them what they want! It's gross!
  • kendall916
    kendall916 Posts: 4,222 Member
    edited February 2015
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    Tried online dating -and still am. Have been on dates before but most of them fizzled out due to long distance or not the right chemistry. Still being hopeful.

    Oh and I've tried POF and okcupid. They're ok dating sites but you really need a critical eye to weed out those who are not a match for you. And you have to also be very patient if you're waiting for a response back if you're interested in a person.
  • kendall916
    kendall916 Posts: 4,222 Member
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    I know this is going to sound immature (this is just a thought) but why not try online dating in MFP? There's a lot of good looking people and most of the people on here are very understanding and patient. :\
  • carlsonrobb
    carlsonrobb Posts: 914 Member
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    I bet if there was a way to sort people close to you geographically it would happen more