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MFP gods of mythology
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Thorsmom05 wrote: »I am cracking up!!!.seriously the best thread
Laughabsicus: The real reason MFPers are able to defy the general population's laws of physics and attain abs, flatbelly, bikini bridges and the lusted after "V" with nary a single crunch.
Laughabsicus, we humbly downward dog in unison in your holy name. Amen.
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Addictionism~I'm addicted to this thread!!
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Bellybegoneacon- God of spot reduction0
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Specialicus Snowflakios- the laws of science, physiology, biology and biochemistry do not apply0
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Spousesavoidus: goddess that protects married MFPers from their spouses seeing their sexually-charged comments to the opposite sex. She is constantly at war with Sleepsoncouchus and Aminotpretticus, her two jealous step-sisters.0
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Lol! ^0
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No list is complete without Caffeinia - the goddess of Mornings and Morning Workouts.
Priest(ess): The element heats, the water boils, the heated water drips into the redolent fine-ground Beans Of Life, and The Elemental And Necessary Essence moves, drop by precious drop, into The Blest Carafe, from which it shall soon be transferred in part into The Grand Ceremonial Cup Of Starting Fluid, and then into Your obedient servant.
Congregation: There is no greater goddess than Caffenina, and Juan Valdez is her Prophet.0 -
Fearmongerous: The god of fear mongering Facebook posts and Netflix documentaries.0
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^^^^my faveljohnson216 wrote: »Spousesavoidus: goddess that protects married MFPers from their spouses seeing their sexually-charged comments to the opposite sex. She is constantly at war with Sleepsoncouchus and Aminotpretticus, her two jealous step-sisters.
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Sugaragnos- god that claims to have the power of addicting people to sugar and making them fat.
Paleonestis- god that states that anyone eating anything processed isn't worthy to adore him
Carry on.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
Moderationator - the god that commands every ones ability to eat everything in moderation and to stay in a calorie deficit.
Luckily this is a sucky god and not a very successful one - if he was MFP would be out of business!!!!
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Milfalopolis - The goddesses among us that are mothers and totally able to bring sex appeal to MFP.0
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Blasphemy. I'm sending Sugaragnos after you.tennisdude2004 wrote: »Sugaragnos- god that claims to have the power of addicting people to sugar and making them fat.
Paleonestis- god that states that anyone eating anything processed isn't worthy to adore him
Carry on.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
Moderationator - the god that commands every ones ability to eat everything in moderation and to stay in a calorie deficit.
Luckily this is a sucky god and not a very successful one - if he was MFP would be out of business!!!!
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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Brosificus- god that commands you eat 6-7 meals a day, down protein after every workout, and do fasted cardio in the morning to get that six pack.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition 0 -
Amputatus- The god that needs to lose 20pounds in a week and will need to cut off a limb to do so.
And this thread is pure gold.0 -
HAHAHA!FiveusByFiveus - The false god worshipped by devout masses who attack all who dare question his supremacy.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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BeachBodicus- overseer of BB coaches on the site.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition 0 -
This is without a doubt the best thread on here.0
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Wooliteus: Goddess who secretly finds the unwashed "airing out" workout clothing of MFPers too lazy/tired/oblivious to wash them after every use and febrezes them while they sleep. Like the tooth fairy... for your crotch.0
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Greatburnicus - robs your friends imagination for supportive feedback commenting on your work out, leaves the only option they can think to post: "great burn" every single time0
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Validistophus: the god of those who need validation by making over the top negative statements seeking compliments. He oversees people who need to hear its okay that they "only" lost 4 lbs this past week, feel fat at 104 lbs, or are disheartened because their bench press is stuck at 350 lbs.0
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Calthulu--- The old god who negates calories that are not logged.0
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I choked. Lol.MyChocolateDiet wrote: »Wooliteus: Goddess who secretly finds the unwashed "airing out" workout clothing of MFPers too lazy/tired/oblivious to wash them after every use and febrezes them while they sleep. Like the tooth fairy... for your crotch.
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Whatthephukicus: the god responsible for waking up next to an empty bag of potato chips and wondering if you had a good time last night.0
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TracyAndersondisciplaticus- follower who is enamored with her system of elongating muscle with 3lbs weights.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition 0 -
ljohnson216 wrote: »Spousesavoidus: goddess that protects married MFPers from their spouses seeing their sexually-charged comments to the opposite sex. She is constantly at war with Sleepsoncouchus and Aminotpretticus, her two jealous step-sisters.
laughssssssss!0 -
suffingfacacus-whines throughout the forum about not losing, when they're overeating and choosing the lowest value possible for calories.
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emily_stew wrote: »WhiteKnighticus- the champion of the downtrodden and butthurt
bahahahhahahaha..
how the hell did I miss out on this thread???0 -
Brogantus - mixes in a modicum of science to make it sound like it is actually scientific advice...0
This discussion has been closed.
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