What nobody tells you about losing weight
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springlering62 wrote: »The Body Dysmorphia is real, and looking in the mirror or photos I can't help but still see the bigger version of me.. Even though I've gone down a size in clothes, and I'm sure clothes don't lie !
Some work colleagues (especially those who say they are trying to lose weight but clearly aren't) get envious and then love to make backhanded comments about the weightloss, or be nasty towards you.
Being treated different in society, for me I just get more elderly people (mostly women!) talk to me 😂.
But the opposite sex (who aren't pensioners haha) never approach me, so that doesn't help my confidence 🙃.
But it's not all doom and gloom, being able to have more energy to do activities you couldn't do before is a bonus, and not feeling pain in the body because you're lighter!
Body dysmorphia can tear its ugly head, even in maintenance, with small weight gains or other events.
I’ve been in maintenance nearly four years now.
I’m in the process of whittling down, sorting and moving 30,000 family photos to a new device. It’s taken dozens of hours over the course of the past few weeks. I’m shocked to see that I was overweight far longer than I’d thought. I had fooled myself for so long. I find myself resting on photos with me in it, criticizing that person and wondering how “she” could justify letting herself go for so long, ashamed at her appearance, and how she could let her family down like that.
I’m far harder on myself in the third person viewing than I would be on a random person on the street. At least I’d have empathy for that person, ya know?
Being immersed in these “fat” photos, along with a few pounds temporary water weight gain from an injury, I find myself looking at, if not fat, a larger woman in the mirror. I know it’s temporary (the swelling’s finally going down a bit) but I am overwhelmed at how easily my brain can fall back in to old, self critical, self deceitful views of myself.
And yet I know, this too shall pass. I’m still on plan, undereating if truth be told, due to anxiety. This is my brain tricking me, my beautiful body healing rather than swelling to mock me.
But it’s interesting as well. Body dysmorphia is a total mind f*** at any time.
True that to the body dysmorphia... When I was at my heaviest and slightly in the overweight BMI category (and for my wedding), I didn't think anything of it and thought I looked fine. Now that I've dropped close to 30 lbs and am in the middle of the "normal" BMI I feel like I'm overweight. It's the struggle with trying to identify when you're having an "irrational" thought about your weight, and it's hard.10 -
I am a day away from my 90-day start time. So far, I have lost 17.2 pounds (211.6 - 194.4, 70in tall). I lost the majority with a calorie deficit diet. I found my maintenance calories on a few sites and averaged them together to get 2153, and from there, I cut my calories by 600 to 1553. I just started walking for 1 hour, 3-4 times a week. My goal is 170 pounds, and will increase my calories to maintain, but not go over. So far, I have not lost hardly any waist circumference, but my hips are shrinking. Even with a new belt, my pants want to fall down now. My chest has shrunk, and I am glad to see the man's boobs going away. I find myself still fighting the mid-day lack of energy and wanting to take a nap. I am turning 50 at the end of June and I just wanted to see what it would feel like to be at a normal weight. I have always been stocky and slowly became obese because of being a long-haul truck driver, switching to a sedentary office job later, always wanting to change but never having the willpower. I bought a home gym last week, but I still have to assemble it. I have no mid-life crisis or grandeur of being a muscle-bound athletic jock. I just want, for once, not to be the overweight, stocky, obese person. Also, I wanted to say that my skin is jiggly and not firm in certain areas. As I lose weight, the feel and texture of my skin are softening in areas where the fat is being burnt or lost. My legs are a bit jiggly towards my torso, but if I flex, the skin tightens. My only worry is that I will have chicken legs and a gut like Homer Simpson.
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Thought about this while I was putting clean dishes away: No one told me that my plate/bowl preferences would change, and that shopping for them (when I need replacements) would be mildly challenging.
I know it's a mind trick, but I find that smaller plates give my smaller portions psychologically more impact. Therefore, plate-wise I'm mostly using what manufacturers call salad plates or appetizer plates, not usually dinner plates.
For bowls, it's actually hard to find bowls that don't make a reasonable serving of ice cream look like a chihuahua in the bottom of an empty swimming pool. Usually they're called "dessert bowls", but even some of those are kind of big.
I've had excellent luck buying smaller, yet still very beautiful, dishes from Japan. As long as you stay away from the ramen bowls, you can find some very reasonably sized dishes that suit very well. I also have some small Chinese dishes I use for everything from dips to single servings of nuts.6 -
Sand_TIger wrote: »
For bowls, it's actually hard to find bowls that don't make a reasonable serving of ice cream look like a chihuahua in the bottom of an empty swimming pool. Usually they're called "dessert bowls", but even some of those are kind of big.
I've had excellent luck buying smaller, yet still very beautiful, dishes from Japan. As long as you stay away from the ramen bowls, you can find some very reasonably sized dishes that suit very well. I also have some small Chinese dishes I use for everything from dips to single servings of nuts.
Ramekins are also really good for ice cream I’ve found - they make a 50g -ish serving look quite substantial
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No one told me about the huge amount of conflicting advice that is available online regarding weightloss.10
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WeimingLi2979 wrote: »No one told me about the huge amount of conflicting advice that is available online regarding weightloss.
LOL ... but, right!?! *no* joke on that score!! What did you choose?
Hi fat, or low fat?
High protein, or low protein?
Carnivore, or Vegan?
Snacks every 2 hours, or Time Restricted Eating?
Mediterranean, or Pescatarian?
I can't even think of the other choices right now. lol
Oh, track WW points, carbs, fibers, protein grabs, ounces of water, mg of sodium, something else?8 -
WeimingLi2979 wrote: »No one told me about the huge amount of conflicting advice that is available online regarding weightloss.
LOL ... but, right!?! *no* joke on that score!! What did you choose?
Hi fat, or low fat?
High protein, or low protein?
Carnivore, or Vegan?
Snacks every 2 hours, or Time Restricted Eating?
Mediterranean, or Pescatarian?
I can't even think of the other choices right now. lol
Oh, track WW points, carbs, fibers, protein grabs, ounces of water, mg of sodium, something else?
There are experts that says that the key to weightloss is CICO (Calories in Calories Out) but there are also experts (I think the most famous now is Dr Jason Fung) that says that it is not feasible because our body will get used to the calorie deficit and then cancel it out eventually. He recommends intermittent fasting instead.
I tried the 16/8 intermittent fasting but I couldn't do it. While others reported higher energy levels, more focus and whatnot. My body started shaking due to low blood sugar at around the 12-hour mark. I couldn't focus on doing anything.
My diet at the current moment is protein (50%), carbs (30%) and Fats (20%) and at about 500 caloric deficit (I do not track religiously though). More natural food and less processed food. I didn't follow any specific diet such as keto, carnivore etc.
I eat about 3 times a day. (Again some experts says to eat 5-6 times but some experts say our bodies are not meant to be eating so many times a day. ) hahaha
I walk at least 5000 steps 4 times a week. Light resistance training 3 times a week.
Started at about 88kg in April. Now I am at 81kg. I used to have many health-related problems such as heat rash, heartburn, mild hypertension and snoring. After changing my diet, surprisingly most of it is gone. My BP has gone down from 145 to 130.
Honestly, I just follow the advice that I am comfortable with. Things that I know I can do long-term and on a consistent basis. I know I cannot avoid carbs because I am Asian. I need my rice and noodles. lol
Ultimately, I just try to listen to my body because everybody is built different.
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This right here is what it all boils down to, in my opinion. Having experimented with various ways of eating, I know there are at least two different versions that work well for me; and a few others that don't. I think that many of the people we consider "experts" are recommending what worked for them -- which may or may not work for the next person.WeimingLi2979 wrote: »Ultimately, I just try to listen to my body because everybody is built different.8 -
takinitalloff wrote: »
This right here is what it all boils down to, in my opinion. Having experimented with various ways of eating, I know there are at least two different versions that work well for me; and a few others that don't. I think that many of the people we consider "experts" are recommending what worked for them -- which may or may not work for the next person.WeimingLi2979 wrote: »Ultimately, I just try to listen to my body because everybody is built different.
B B B BBbbbbbbingo!
I enjoy candy.
My life would be much sadder if I had to restrict myself to no sugar at all ever.
I also am physically disabled and either rely on someone else to cook for me (most of my meals) or prepackaged convenience food. Including microwave meals and canned goods.
There is a good reason my diary is private. I am not open to comments about my personal choices to eat. And I know that I am not a good example for others who don’t have to rely on such things.
Everyone is different. Physically, mentally, medically, motivationally, and temperamentally. There really are a huge number of choices.
What distinguishes the successful long timers here from those who are here for a few weeks or months is that they have dialed in what works best for them Often after some trials and revisions.
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Nobody told me that I’d wear horizontal stripes again, and not give it a second thought.16
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WeimingLi2979 wrote: »WeimingLi2979 wrote: »No one told me about the huge amount of conflicting advice that is available online regarding weightloss.
LOL ... but, right!?! *no* joke on that score!! What did you choose?
Hi fat, or low fat?
High protein, or low protein?
Carnivore, or Vegan?
Snacks every 2 hours, or Time Restricted Eating?
Mediterranean, or Pescatarian?
I can't even think of the other choices right now. lol
Oh, track WW points, carbs, fibers, protein grabs, ounces of water, mg of sodium, something else?
There are experts that says that the key to weightloss is CICO (Calories in Calories Out) but there are also experts (I think the most famous now is Dr Jason Fung) that says that it is not feasible because our body will get used to the calorie deficit and then cancel it out eventually. He recommends intermittent fasting instead.
I tried the 16/8 intermittent fasting but I couldn't do it. While others reported higher energy levels, more focus and whatnot. My body started shaking due to low blood sugar at around the 12-hour mark. I couldn't focus on doing anything.
My diet at the current moment is protein (50%), carbs (30%) and Fats (20%) and at about 500 caloric deficit (I do not track religiously though). More natural food and less processed food. I didn't follow any specific diet such as keto, carnivore etc.
I eat about 3 times a day. (Again some experts says to eat 5-6 times but some experts say our bodies are not meant to be eating so many times a day. ) hahaha
I walk at least 5000 steps 4 times a week. Light resistance training 3 times a week.
Started at about 88kg in April. Now I am at 81kg. I used to have many health-related problems such as heat rash, heartburn, mild hypertension and snoring. After changing my diet, surprisingly most of it is gone. My BP has gone down from 145 to 130.
Honestly, I just follow the advice that I am comfortable with. Things that I know I can do long-term and on a consistent basis. I know I cannot avoid carbs because I am Asian. I need my rice and noodles. lol
Ultimately, I just try to listen to my body because everybody is built different.
Inspiring ! Congratulations, and good luck. I laughed with all the experts' competing advice. It really is amazing, the opposite advices you get. BTW, just to throw more 'advice' into the mix ;-), I read recently that 16:8 or 14:10 IF was not recommended other than as a short-term 'reboot', as it could have negative cardiovascular outcomes after awhile. But Circadian 12:12 Time Restricted Eating IF was recommended
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Eat this, avoid that, exercise this way, not that way, and Dr. Who, what, when, and where to include why videos by the thousands. It can be an information overload. Additionally, we must be honest with ourselves about why we want to gain or lose fat or muscle, to improve or reduce health implications. Last is our willpower, financial ability, and current abilities according to our health and physical level. For myself, I found a diet using a TDEE calculator and followed a cutting diet. It works for me, and that is the key. We all have our likes and dislikes regarding food or exercise, but also our current level of physical fitness. Find something you can do or like and exploit it! For exercise, whether it is walking, swimming, or weight lifting, find something you like and exploit. Same with dieting or calorie deficit diet, find recipes or make stuff you like and fit it in your macros or calorie limits. I myself love my sweet iced tea; I reduced the sugar to an acceptable level for my taste and removed soda from my diet. Also, I no longer use the riding mower, and I push mow my lawn when it is cool enough (my lawn is just .57 acre), lol. I like to walk, but it is very hot and humid where I live, so I try to wait until about dusk when I can walk when it is cooler, but I also walk where there is shade. There are many other examples that I used; just find your own and exploit them.10
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Some things for me ..
1. My tailbone sticks out and becomes sore!
2. That some of the things I thought would happen after wt loss haven’t happened like self worth increasing. Or others.
3. Depression has improved though to the point of not needing the medicine.
4. My thinking is clearer…energy level definitely improved.
I so agree that this journey is for a life time..I also think the mind has be brought in to the diet. I have a work book that I work in every day and probing questions to answer. Journaling is key ..,and affirmations to say each day… there are so many negative thoughts going through my mind that need confronting…self discovery. “Our bodies are fearfully and wonderfully made” Psalms 139… Another quote12 -
10 kg down on a mission to get down to normal weight clothes looser feeling younger full of energy full of positivity becoming an inspiration for others are all plus poins with zero negative onwards and upward the reboot install of a better me is a longer download but their will not be a final version have a great week all6
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windsorlisa wrote: »--
Hi @windsorlisa welcome to the boards!
Doing this won’t bookmark a thread for you on MFP.
To bookmark a thread, scroll to the top and click the flag to turn it blue. Then any new posts will show up when you click your profile pic while in the community area.
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I started doing CrossFit in March and worked my butt off for two months. I didn’t weigh myself because I wanted to give myself a reward in May at my dr. Appointment. I literally thought I had lost 40-50 lbs as if I was a 25 year old… I got on the scale and it was the exact weight I had started at. SERIOUSLY DELUSIONAL I could not believe it. Sadly i cried about it. But I used it to make the necessary changes and get serious about my diet. I weigh myself multiple times per week now lol12
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jacqueliny wrote: »Some things for me ..
1. My tailbone sticks out and becomes sore!
2. That some of the things I thought would happen after wt loss haven’t happened like self worth increasing. Or others.
3. Depression has improved though to the point of not needing the medicine.
4. My thinking is clearer…energy level definitely improved.
I so agree that this journey is for a life time..I also think the mind has be brought in to the diet. I have a work book that I work in every day and probing questions to answer. Journaling is key ..,and affirmations to say each day… there are so many negative thoughts going through my mind that need confronting…self discovery. “Our bodies are fearfully and wonderfully made” Psalms 139… Another quote
I am very interested in the workbook. I think I'm going to try to saturate myself with positivity and see if that doesn't help! I love that verse in Psalms! I find your story so inspiring!3
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