When you SHOULDN'T count calories

ftsolk

I understand that the basic premise of weight loss is that one must burn more calories than he or she consumes.

Of course, it is not always an exact science. The 3,500 calories= a pound rule is an estimation, and it doesn't take into account the 20% margin of error allowed on nutritional labels here in the USA (as well as personal user error in calculating portion sizes, etc). Still, as long as you eat less than what you burn, you should eventually lose weight. (Just know that other factors such as water retention and the timing/weight of your last meal and bathroom visit may influence the scale as well).

That being said, I am also aware that calorie counting does not work for me. I am aware that if I stick to meticulously counting calories (or Weight Watchers points, as I have done in the past), I will lose weight. However, I have not been able to stick to it long-term.

I would even go as far as saying that I, personally, should NOT count calories.

Let me explain.

I am a very black and white thinker with a history of anxiety and depression. Often, calorie counting means I become obsessive. I weigh everything I eat down to the last gram. Eating out in a social situation is only permissible if nutritional information is readily available (I cannot cope with just estimating calories or portion sizes). This is becoming more of a challenge as, although I do not eat out as frequently as I have in the past (I tend to go to a restaurant once every 2 weeks or so during the school, year), my current social life revolves more around church groups with homemade food, or dinners at friends' houses.

So, if I'm in a situation where I don't know the exact numbers, I tend to cope by not eating anything at all, or binging. Either way, my need for perfection drives me to destruction even before I get into the details of my Fitbit calorie burn, TDEE calculators, deficit sizes, and the like. I also worry that, with my personal history, I could very likely spiral into the realms of an eating disorder if I get too engrossed in calorie counting.

I know that I am not the only person out there who cannot deal with counting calories- or SHOULDN'T. While I have never struggled with anorexia or another eating disorder, I can see how someone with a history of anorexia who could also afford to lose some weight after recovery, should steer away from diet plans that involve counting calories simply because it could trigger a relapse of self-destructive behaviors.

So, how do you lose weight without counting calories or cutting out any major food groups? I understand that it may be slow weight loss, but I'm becoming more and more content with that idea. I'm already trying to make small changes like consistently eating a packed lunch at work (with fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains) instead of opting for quick-on the go options like potato chips, snack cakes, hummus with pretzel chips, or Lunchables. That, coupled with the fact that I've gone from eating at restaurants 1 to 3 times a week (up to 4 or 5 days at one point) to eating at a restaurant roughly 2-3 times a month should help. (Eating at a friends' house usually happens a couple times a month- if that. Church food events are more frequent, but I tend to nibble at the food there, so it's less of an issue.

tomatoey

If you have reason to suspect counting may incline you to mental health problems, or exacerbate existing ones, I think it's ideal to talk to a pro with experience in this area.

That said, I wonder if simple portion control might be a way to go for you. You could try using visual estimates and continuing to put the emphasis on the kinds of small changes you've already made.

A quick and dirty way to look at meals might be:

1 portion of protein the size of your palm + 1/2 cup starch (or 1 piece bread) + 2 cups veg or 1 cup veg + 1 cup fruit

Times three for your meals, plus a couple of small snacks.

You could get bowls* at home sized to help you work those portions out, and just trust the bowls. You'll get better at guessing portions when you're out that way, too.

This is just regular food guide stuff, but it might be easier than weighing and counting etc.

For exercise, do 30-60 minutes of something every day. Try to get resistance training in 2 x a week. Work hard when you can, take it easy when your body needs it.

Sleep.
***********

*OR use measuring cups, unless they're triggering. Worked for me (my scales kept breaking). 1/2 cup or 1 cup portions are easy to work with for most things. I use them like serving spoons.

Depending on your food choices, that should run you anywhere from 1500 to 2200 or so (or I guess more if you get really super high cal stuff). But you wouldn't go far wrong with it. If you're consistently active and have more than 10 lbs to lose, it'll work.

queenliz99

www.nosdiet.com

This maybe something you might consider. No calorie counting at all. It's premise is very easy. No sweets, no snacks, no seconds except on Saturday and Sunday. I kind of do this myself so eventually I don't have to calorie count.

lorrpb

^^ What she said. Dietitians suggest that you visualize your plate as 1/2 veggies/fruit, 1/4 protein, 1/4 health carbs. I counted calories for about 3 months, ending last August. Didn't count again until earlier this month for a week just to check on myself and I was right on target with calories and macros. This works for me because I'm a very consistent eater, with just a few "go to" menus for each meal and snack.

kk_inprogress

What @tomatoey said is how I started and how I track when I'm on vacation and when I need a "break," but with that said, I haven't gained weight doing it that way. I was able to maintain 0.5lb a week loss for 5 months this way as well.

I don't necessarily recommend any "diet," even the one ^ above because it is restrictive and I find I snack and binge less when I eat what I like, just in moderation.

queenliz99

kkenseth wrote: »

What @tomatoey said is how I started and how I track when I'm on vacation and when I need a "break," but with that said, I haven't gained weight doing it that way. I was able to maintain 0.5lb a week loss for 5 months this way as well.

I don't necessarily recommend any "diet," even the one ^ above because it is restrictive and I find I snack and binge less when I eat what I like, just in moderation.

I understand it has a funny name, it's not a diet but a way to eat without counting. It's not restrictive but it is not for everyone. But if you get hung up on counting, this may help OP.

Blueseraphchaos

Every time i see you post on here, the only thing i can think is that you seriously, SERIOUSLY need to see a therapist. I'd wondered in the past if you might just be trolling but i came eventually to the conclusion that you just simply need some professional help..so I'll say to you what i have said before, albeit months and months ago....speak to a therapist. Even without counting calories, doing something else, what have you, you have disordered thinking....and this most recent post tells me it's still lingering, even if not as badly as it used to...

kk_inprogress

queenliz99 wrote: »

kkenseth wrote: »

What @tomatoey said is how I started and how I track when I'm on vacation and when I need a "break," but with that said, I haven't gained weight doing it that way. I was able to maintain 0.5lb a week loss for 5 months this way as well.

I don't necessarily recommend any "diet," even the one ^ above because it is restrictive and I find I snack and binge less when I eat what I like, just in moderation.

I understand it has a funny name, it's not a diet but a way to eat without counting. It's not restrictive but it is not for everyone. But if you get hung up on counting, this may help OP.

Fair enough. I just hear "no sweets" and "no snacks" and don't think it sounds fun because I like fruit a lot and snacks are a critical part of my nutrition.

tomatoey

Blueseraphchaos wrote: »

Every time i see you post on here, the only thing i can think is that you seriously, SERIOUSLY need to see a therapist. I'd wondered in the past if you might just be trolling but i came eventually to the conclusion that you just simply need some professional help..so I'll say to you what i have said before, albeit months and months ago....speak to a therapist. Even without counting calories, doing something else, what have you, you have disordered thinking....and this most recent post tells me it's still lingering, even if not as badly as it used to...

? OP has openly talked about having some issues and is actively trying to guard against making things worse. Hopefully she's getting therapy if she needs it. She is probably aware of the option.

*****

OP by the way re protein - I just said "size of your palm" because that's what's generally recommended as a serving size, but I don't know if 3 x that would be enough for you. It actually wouldn't be for me I eat a little less than my whole hand's worth of protein at each of my three squares. But you get the idea.

Blueseraphchaos

I've just seen a lot of her posts in the past and seriously, not trying to be mean, they just worry me. But it's mfp and everyone is mean here.

tomatoey

Actually I said the same thing, come to think of it

Blueseraphchaos

But i will add, if you don't have time or money or insurance to see a therapist or a doctor, there is some good advice here...if you choose to listen to it...but that's entirely up to you.

ETA it does appear as if you've come some distance on your own, so if you're unwilling or unable to see a therapist, i hope you continue down this path. I believe (since I'm off and on the forums irregularly) that the last time i saw you post, you were still doing weight watchers. I'm glad you're finding out what works and what doesn't work for you.

Blondiez73

To me, it sounds like you're looking for an excuse to not count calories. If you don't want to count then don't count. You don't need our permission to count or not count, just do whatever makes you feel best.

Blueseraphchaos

tomatoey wrote: »

Actually I said the same thing, come to think of it

Lol

I just have the benefit of a good memory and having been on mfp for almost 5 years (despite my profile saying something else and my log-in streak being what it is) and i remember ftsolk and her former incarnation on here. She sounded very conflicted and confused before...even if her writing style never indicated, her posts did, and i feel like this is kind of in the same vein.

amusedmonkey

Calorie counting is a tool among other weight loss tools. It may be the most accurate one, but it's not the only one. If calorie counting causes issues then try following portion guidelines, eating more "safe" foods (foods known not to be very calorie rich), intuitive eating, protein control, trying out more pre-counted recipes and adopting the ones you like as staples, protein control, eating more slowly...etc.

Christine_72

To me, it sounds like you're creating problems before they even happen, IF they in fact will happen at all. Like worrying about anorexia etc. when you've never even been in this headspace.

I used to be against using a food scale and weighing every little thing I eat because I saw it as obsessive. But here I am weighing my food and counting my calories, and I quite enjoy it, and I am far from obsessive about it.

The bottom line is, I wanted to lose weight and you gotta do what you gotta do...

You can continue to use excuses why you cant do this or that, or you can put your head down and bum up and just do it!
This may sound harsh, but there are a million and one threads on here filled with excuses..

tomatoey

christinev297 wrote: »

To me, it sounds like you're creating problems before they even happen, IF they in fact will happen at all. Like worrying about anorexia etc. when you've never even been in this headspace.

I used to be against using a food scale and weighing every little thing I eat because I saw it as obsessive. But here I am weighing my food and counting my calories, and I quite enjoy it, and I am far from obsessive about it.

The bottom line is, I wanted to lose weight and you gotta do what you gotta do...

You can continue to use excuses why you cant do this or that, or you can put your head down and bum up and just do it!
This may sound harsh, but there are a million and one threads on here filled with excuses..

Having a history of anxiety and obsessive tendencies is a solid reason to not choose calorie counting as a method of monitoring food intake - they don't always go well together. And counting calories and weighing your food really isn't the only way to lose weight, despite what many on this site believe.

Christine_72

tomatoey wrote: »

christinev297 wrote: »

To me, it sounds like you're creating problems before they even happen, IF they in fact will happen at all. Like worrying about anorexia etc. when you've never even been in this headspace.

I used to be against using a food scale and weighing every little thing I eat because I saw it as obsessive. But here I am weighing my food and counting my calories, and I quite enjoy it, and I am far from obsessive about it.

The bottom line is, I wanted to lose weight and you gotta do what you gotta do...

You can continue to use excuses why you cant do this or that, or you can put your head down and bum up and just do it!
This may sound harsh, but there are a million and one threads on here filled with excuses..

Having a history of anxiety and obsessive tendencies is a solid reason to not choose calorie counting as a method of monitoring food intake - they don't always go well together. And counting calories and weighing your food really isn't the only way to lose weight, despite what many on this site believe.

I agree that many people lose weight without weighing or counting a single calorie.

I'm reading OP'S post at face value , all of them

And my last post explains the impression I'm left with..

BethMilledge

Feel free to add me

labohn91

I agree 100% which is unlike me must be sick of lack or sleep. Best regards.