When you SHOULDN'T count calories
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I don't think this is a matter of you SHOULDN'T count calories. It's more of a you DON'T WANT TO count calories.
Some of us on MFP have been here long enough to remember your old account and threads, which provide much more context.I've been struggling with sticking to a diet. I've tried just about everything in the past. Since November, I've tried South Beach, Weight Watchers, counting calories on both Sparkpeople and MFP, and just trying to eat healthier in general. I also tried a Paleo diet for a week. I've lost a few pounds here or there, but I've never been able to stick to anything for more than a week or two. Most of the time, I'm lucky if I last more than a day or two.
I'm just not sure what to do. When I tried South Beach and Paleo, I did alright to start (I lost 6 pounds in a week on a Paleo Diet),but I constantly craved all I couldn't eat. I definitely do better with calorie counting in that respect. I think having forbidden foods is a recipe for disaster- at least for me.
At the same time, I've never been a math person, and I HATE dealing with numbers. On top of that, trying to plan out my meals ahead of time is a challenge on MFP simply because I don't know how many calories I'll have to spend each day based on my activity level (I wear a Fitbit 24/7). I might have 1,200 calories total for the day (estimated by dinnertime), or I might have 2,000. It really can vary, and it's hard for me to keep up.
Plus, like I said before, I HATE NUMBERS. They stress me out immensely. I always feel like I'm hungrier when I'm counting calories.
Not to mention that eating things like whole eggs, whole milk, nuts, and full-fat cheese seem like waste of calories compared to lower-fat options- but I definitely prefer the full-fat dairy and whole eggs. I almost feel like I'm being "punished" when I pour a 150 calorie cup of whole milk when I know I can save about 50 calories and have skim milk- even though i know there are benefits to drinking the full-fat dairy (plus, it tastes better, in my opinion).
I will say, however, that in the past, I was successful with counting calories for about a month or so, but that was nearly 2 years ago, and I have not had any success since then.
Certainly, you CAN lose weight without calorie counting. But I think your problem is consistency and actually sticking to something. I mean the above quote is from 2013, 2 years ago, and you're STILL having the same issue. Either commit yourself to one thing or nothing at all. But it's obvious that what you're currently doing, is not working. And if you're not already, seek out some professional help.
Because no one on this site ever tried to lose weight unsuccessfully before their perfectly successful effort today.
Yeah but should it take years to figure it out, while continuing to make the same mistakes?
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You can get a portion control thing from nutrisystem it goes on the plate you put the food in and take it off. Until you can figure out portions for yourself.0
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christinev297 wrote: »I don't think this is a matter of you SHOULDN'T count calories. It's more of a you DON'T WANT TO count calories.
Some of us on MFP have been here long enough to remember your old account and threads, which provide much more context.I've been struggling with sticking to a diet. I've tried just about everything in the past. Since November, I've tried South Beach, Weight Watchers, counting calories on both Sparkpeople and MFP, and just trying to eat healthier in general. I also tried a Paleo diet for a week. I've lost a few pounds here or there, but I've never been able to stick to anything for more than a week or two. Most of the time, I'm lucky if I last more than a day or two.
I'm just not sure what to do. When I tried South Beach and Paleo, I did alright to start (I lost 6 pounds in a week on a Paleo Diet),but I constantly craved all I couldn't eat. I definitely do better with calorie counting in that respect. I think having forbidden foods is a recipe for disaster- at least for me.
At the same time, I've never been a math person, and I HATE dealing with numbers. On top of that, trying to plan out my meals ahead of time is a challenge on MFP simply because I don't know how many calories I'll have to spend each day based on my activity level (I wear a Fitbit 24/7). I might have 1,200 calories total for the day (estimated by dinnertime), or I might have 2,000. It really can vary, and it's hard for me to keep up.
Plus, like I said before, I HATE NUMBERS. They stress me out immensely. I always feel like I'm hungrier when I'm counting calories.
Not to mention that eating things like whole eggs, whole milk, nuts, and full-fat cheese seem like waste of calories compared to lower-fat options- but I definitely prefer the full-fat dairy and whole eggs. I almost feel like I'm being "punished" when I pour a 150 calorie cup of whole milk when I know I can save about 50 calories and have skim milk- even though i know there are benefits to drinking the full-fat dairy (plus, it tastes better, in my opinion).
I will say, however, that in the past, I was successful with counting calories for about a month or so, but that was nearly 2 years ago, and I have not had any success since then.
Certainly, you CAN lose weight without calorie counting. But I think your problem is consistency and actually sticking to something. I mean the above quote is from 2013, 2 years ago, and you're STILL having the same issue. Either commit yourself to one thing or nothing at all. But it's obvious that what you're currently doing, is not working. And if you're not already, seek out some professional help.
Because no one on this site ever tried to lose weight unsuccessfully before their perfectly successful effort today.
Yeah but should it take years to figure it out, while continuing to make the same mistakes?
IMO...it take most people many years to figure it out. Some never do or obesity would not be the problem that it is.
Myself personally...I wouldn't be on this site if I had it all figured out. I have had successes...I have had failures.
Does the OP have a bad relationship with food...diet...tracking...obviously she does. Has she failed in the past...yes...but so have I and so have many others here on this site.
Will she succeed this time...I don't know. Will I succeed this time...I'm planning on it...but I also am a realist...I might not.
I am not sure why someone felt as if they needed to drag her posts up from 2 years ago. Were they trying to help her...or humiliate her. I wonder.
For myself...2 years ago...I had regained 40 pounds of what I had previously lost...I then lost 80lbs...regained 40 of that back. Here I am again trying to get it right this time. Each time I have learned a little more about food, nutrition, diet, exercise but most importantly I have learned a little more about myself.
I would hate to think that I was being judged on how well I did this two years ago...might as well take me out and shoot me now...because I was a failure at it...no different than the OP.
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I don't think this is a matter of you SHOULDN'T count calories. It's more of a you DON'T WANT TO count calories.
Some of us on MFP have been here long enough to remember your old account and threads, which provide much more context.I've been struggling with sticking to a diet. I've tried just about everything in the past. Since November, I've tried South Beach, Weight Watchers, counting calories on both Sparkpeople and MFP, and just trying to eat healthier in general. I also tried a Paleo diet for a week. I've lost a few pounds here or there, but I've never been able to stick to anything for more than a week or two. Most of the time, I'm lucky if I last more than a day or two.
I'm just not sure what to do. When I tried South Beach and Paleo, I did alright to start (I lost 6 pounds in a week on a Paleo Diet),but I constantly craved all I couldn't eat. I definitely do better with calorie counting in that respect. I think having forbidden foods is a recipe for disaster- at least for me.
At the same time, I've never been a math person, and I HATE dealing with numbers. On top of that, trying to plan out my meals ahead of time is a challenge on MFP simply because I don't know how many calories I'll have to spend each day based on my activity level (I wear a Fitbit 24/7). I might have 1,200 calories total for the day (estimated by dinnertime), or I might have 2,000. It really can vary, and it's hard for me to keep up.
Plus, like I said before, I HATE NUMBERS. They stress me out immensely. I always feel like I'm hungrier when I'm counting calories.
Not to mention that eating things like whole eggs, whole milk, nuts, and full-fat cheese seem like waste of calories compared to lower-fat options- but I definitely prefer the full-fat dairy and whole eggs. I almost feel like I'm being "punished" when I pour a 150 calorie cup of whole milk when I know I can save about 50 calories and have skim milk- even though i know there are benefits to drinking the full-fat dairy (plus, it tastes better, in my opinion).
I will say, however, that in the past, I was successful with counting calories for about a month or so, but that was nearly 2 years ago, and I have not had any success since then.
Certainly, you CAN lose weight without calorie counting. But I think your problem is consistency and actually sticking to something. I mean the above quote is from 2013, 2 years ago, and you're STILL having the same issue. Either commit yourself to one thing or nothing at all. But it's obvious that what you're currently doing, is not working. And if you're not already, seek out some professional help.
Because no one on this site ever tried to lose weight unsuccessfully before their perfectly successful effort today.
Yes of course others have tried unsucessfully in the past too or fallen off the wagon and got back on again.
But they are not usually still at square 1 several years later tying to find the perfect easy system - which it seems to me OP is.
She seems to have a history of giving up on everything after a week or so -suggesting to me the problem is not the systems per se but unrealistic expectations and attitude on her part.
There seems little point in suggesting other systems to OP until she sorts this out first.
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I don't think this is a matter of you SHOULDN'T count calories. It's more of a you DON'T WANT TO count calories.
Some of us on MFP have been here long enough to remember your old account and threads, which provide much more context.I've been struggling with sticking to a diet. I've tried just about everything in the past. Since November, I've tried South Beach, Weight Watchers, counting calories on both Sparkpeople and MFP, and just trying to eat healthier in general. I also tried a Paleo diet for a week. I've lost a few pounds here or there, but I've never been able to stick to anything for more than a week or two. Most of the time, I'm lucky if I last more than a day or two.
I'm just not sure what to do. When I tried South Beach and Paleo, I did alright to start (I lost 6 pounds in a week on a Paleo Diet),but I constantly craved all I couldn't eat. I definitely do better with calorie counting in that respect. I think having forbidden foods is a recipe for disaster- at least for me.
At the same time, I've never been a math person, and I HATE dealing with numbers. On top of that, trying to plan out my meals ahead of time is a challenge on MFP simply because I don't know how many calories I'll have to spend each day based on my activity level (I wear a Fitbit 24/7). I might have 1,200 calories total for the day (estimated by dinnertime), or I might have 2,000. It really can vary, and it's hard for me to keep up.
Plus, like I said before, I HATE NUMBERS. They stress me out immensely. I always feel like I'm hungrier when I'm counting calories.
Not to mention that eating things like whole eggs, whole milk, nuts, and full-fat cheese seem like waste of calories compared to lower-fat options- but I definitely prefer the full-fat dairy and whole eggs. I almost feel like I'm being "punished" when I pour a 150 calorie cup of whole milk when I know I can save about 50 calories and have skim milk- even though i know there are benefits to drinking the full-fat dairy (plus, it tastes better, in my opinion).
I will say, however, that in the past, I was successful with counting calories for about a month or so, but that was nearly 2 years ago, and I have not had any success since then.
Certainly, you CAN lose weight without calorie counting. But I think your problem is consistency and actually sticking to something. I mean the above quote is from 2013, 2 years ago, and you're STILL having the same issue. Either commit yourself to one thing or nothing at all. But it's obvious that what you're currently doing, is not working. And if you're not already, seek out some professional help.
I think that she has been working on losing weight for 4-5 years and has lost 15/80 pounds. A young, physically healthy person should not take that long to make so little progress.
Many of us are familiar with this poster from MFP, SparkPeople and the various accounts that she has had on both sites. She won't count calories consistently, won't stop eating like a toddler, won't move her social life away from food-centric activities and won't do intentional exercise. She overthinks everything to the greatest degree possible. I would really love to see her make progress and be successful, but like a lot of people here, I feel like every possible piece of advice has already been given and ignored.
Lissa, I agree, you shouldn't count calories or focus on dieting at all for now. You need to put all of your energy into getting your mental health in order before you are going to make any progress with your diet, ever. You need to get professional mental health treatment that is NOT clergy-based, preferably from someone who can prescribe medications. Whatever you are doing, it is not working for you because you are still stuck in the same cycle that you have been in for ages.
I really wish you the best, but I don't think that anybody here is going to be able to help you.0 -
Well, it's not like I can make them stop serving food at any and all church events. And I would love to go work out for an hour a day, but after being on my feet walking for 6 to 7 hours a day, 5 days a week, there are days where I rely on painkillers just to walk to the bathroom. Right now, I take 15,000 to 20,000 steps a day on average, and I often go for short walks with friends when we go out. I'm limping on the walks, but I suppose weight loss is supposed to be synonymous with pain.
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Well, it's not like I can make them stop serving food at any and all church events. And I would love to go work out for an hour a day, but after being on my feet walking for 6 to 7 hours a day, 5 days a week, there are days where I rely on painkillers just to walk to the bathroom. Right now, I take 15,000 to 20,000 steps a day on average, and I often go for short walks with friends when we go out. I'm limping on the walks, but I suppose weight loss is supposed to be synonymous with pain.
You don't have to eat all the food at all the church events all the time, though. Don't work out for an hour, don't work out at all. If you can't walk then don't put yourself through pain. Just lower your intake so that your body is not storing your calories as fat. Unless you'd rather just be fat, then do that.
Right now, you're eating more than you're burning, if you weren't, then you wouldn't be here.0 -
True, when I go straight from work until church, I don't have to eat. I can go from lunch at 3 pm and wait until midnight to eat dinner. No problem.0
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Well, it's not like I can make them stop serving food at any and all church events. And I would love to go work out for an hour a day, but after being on my feet walking for 6 to 7 hours a day, 5 days a week, there are days where I rely on painkillers just to walk to the bathroom. Right now, I take 15,000 to 20,000 steps a day on average, and I often go for short walks with friends when we go out. I'm limping on the walks, but I suppose weight loss is supposed to be synonymous with pain.
If that's your step count then you are more active than most people. You don't need to workout extra if you don't want/cant. Please see my previous suggestions and you may be able to work church food into your diet. Just see what is usually served, check the calories, and set certain portions you shouldn't be going over.0 -
Well, it's not like I can make them stop serving food at any and all church events. And I would love to go work out for an hour a day, but after being on my feet walking for 6 to 7 hours a day, 5 days a week, there are days where I rely on painkillers just to walk to the bathroom. Right now, I take 15,000 to 20,000 steps a day on average, and I often go for short walks with friends when we go out. I'm limping on the walks, but I suppose weight loss is supposed to be synonymous with pain.
This is seriously like a re-hash of your previous threads. I'm not trying to be mean or pick on you or anything like that, but you have a serious case of the "I don't want to hear its". It's just excuse after excuse. Yes, you CAN still exercise, if you WANT to. Have you read any of the success stories here? You'll find alot with people with SEVERE physical limitations. Even some with people who are wheelchair bound. Didn't stop them. Some people overcame cancer and brain surgery. Didn't stop them. So saying "I can't walk after being on my feet all day" is kind of a cop out. I'm not saying you're not in physical pain. But there's more to exercise than just being on your feet and walking. What about strength training? Has nothing to do with your X amount of steps.
Church food. You could always bring a dish that you will eat. You could always eat less of what's served. It's just another excuse of "well I can't control what I eat at X event". You can. You just don't want to. Either bring your own foods, have someone bring something for you if you're going right after work and don't have storage for it, or eat less of what's offered.True, when I go straight from work until church, I don't have to eat. I can go from lunch at 3 pm and wait until midnight to eat dinner. No problem.
This comes off petulantly. You can easily fit in a cheese stick, apple, or some snack. Please.
You work at a grocery store, there's plenty of healthy snacks you can pick up after your shift and befor eyou go to some sort of social function.0 -
paperpudding wrote: »I don't think this is a matter of you SHOULDN'T count calories. It's more of a you DON'T WANT TO count calories.
Some of us on MFP have been here long enough to remember your old account and threads, which provide much more context.I've been struggling with sticking to a diet. I've tried just about everything in the past. Since November, I've tried South Beach, Weight Watchers, counting calories on both Sparkpeople and MFP, and just trying to eat healthier in general. I also tried a Paleo diet for a week. I've lost a few pounds here or there, but I've never been able to stick to anything for more than a week or two. Most of the time, I'm lucky if I last more than a day or two.
I'm just not sure what to do. When I tried South Beach and Paleo, I did alright to start (I lost 6 pounds in a week on a Paleo Diet),but I constantly craved all I couldn't eat. I definitely do better with calorie counting in that respect. I think having forbidden foods is a recipe for disaster- at least for me.
At the same time, I've never been a math person, and I HATE dealing with numbers. On top of that, trying to plan out my meals ahead of time is a challenge on MFP simply because I don't know how many calories I'll have to spend each day based on my activity level (I wear a Fitbit 24/7). I might have 1,200 calories total for the day (estimated by dinnertime), or I might have 2,000. It really can vary, and it's hard for me to keep up.
Plus, like I said before, I HATE NUMBERS. They stress me out immensely. I always feel like I'm hungrier when I'm counting calories.
Not to mention that eating things like whole eggs, whole milk, nuts, and full-fat cheese seem like waste of calories compared to lower-fat options- but I definitely prefer the full-fat dairy and whole eggs. I almost feel like I'm being "punished" when I pour a 150 calorie cup of whole milk when I know I can save about 50 calories and have skim milk- even though i know there are benefits to drinking the full-fat dairy (plus, it tastes better, in my opinion).
I will say, however, that in the past, I was successful with counting calories for about a month or so, but that was nearly 2 years ago, and I have not had any success since then.
Certainly, you CAN lose weight without calorie counting. But I think your problem is consistency and actually sticking to something. I mean the above quote is from 2013, 2 years ago, and you're STILL having the same issue. Either commit yourself to one thing or nothing at all. But it's obvious that what you're currently doing, is not working. And if you're not already, seek out some professional help.
Because no one on this site ever tried to lose weight unsuccessfully before their perfectly successful effort today.
Yes of course others have tried unsucessfully in the past too or fallen off the wagon and got back on again.
But they are not usually still at square 1 several years later tying to find the perfect easy system - which it seems to me OP is.
She seems to have a history of giving up on everything after a week or so -suggesting to me the problem is not the systems per se but unrealistic expectations and attitude on her part.
There seems little point in suggesting other systems to OP until she sorts this out first.
This.
I'm not saying at all it doesn't take time to figure things out. And yes, in some cases years. But to be at the exact same point for over two years? And after asking for the same advice on these very forums? She isn't taking the advice in and listening to what people are saying then or now.0 -
True, when I go straight from work until church, I don't have to eat. I can go from lunch at 3 pm and wait until midnight to eat dinner. No problem.
This is the sort of dilemma all of us face - variations on how to make it work within the limitations of our real Iives.
You take something with you from work or you select a small portion of food offered when you get there, choosing something lower in calories.
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No need to be a martyr about it.Well, it's not like I can make them stop serving food at any and all church events. And I would love to go work out for an hour a day, but after being on my feet walking for 6 to 7 hours a day, 5 days a week, there are days where I rely on painkillers just to walk to the bathroom. Right now, I take 15,000 to 20,000 steps a day on average, and I often go for short walks with friends when we go out. I'm limping on the walks, but I suppose weight loss is supposed to be synonymous with pain.
Of course you dont have to walk an hour a day.
I don't.
But you do what you can and whatever you do, you adjust your intake accordingly.
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True, when I go straight from work until church, I don't have to eat. I can go from lunch at 3 pm and wait until midnight to eat dinner. No problem.
How does "don't eat all the food at all the church functions all the time" equate to "eat nothing between 3pm and midnight." ? That's some serious distortion going on.
Just admit you don't want to work on your weight and move on with your life.
Do you ignore the sermons on the sin of gluttony when it comes up at your church functions?0 -
Interesting thread and loads of good advice, but I get the feeling its all been given before.
If you dont want to count calories, then dont, there are plenty of other ways of estimating/ moderating your food count. You could simply use the scales but then you might get scale obsessed or even the tape measure, but then you might get obsessed with that as well.
There have been lots of suggestions, but surely you have had time to try all those in the last few years? That points towards whatever the plan you will not be able to stick to it because ultimately you need to be at deficit by virtue of burning more than you consume. The root cause of this is not implementing it, commiting and being consistent. Thats a mental thing. You are leting yourself creae barriers where none exist and refusing to bite the bullet by grappling with the issues.
You need to work with your therapist to tackle the underlying mental health issues, because thats the problem imo and not what sort of diet you might go on. Agree with shell1005.
Thanks ninkyou for the memory.
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Well, it's not like I can make them stop serving food at any and all church events. And I would love to go work out for an hour a day, but after being on my feet walking for 6 to 7 hours a day, 5 days a week, there are days where I rely on painkillers just to walk to the bathroom. Right now, I take 15,000 to 20,000 steps a day on average, and I often go for short walks with friends when we go out. I'm limping on the walks, but I suppose weight loss is supposed to be synonymous with pain.
Weight loss does not at all have to be synonymous with pain. You average 15-20K steps a day? That is far more activity than a lot of the people on here. I average under 15k steps, and my TDEE is around 2100. I would imagine yours is similar or even higher depending on your current height and weight. You can easily moderate your calorie intake to 1500 cals/day net and probably lose 1 lb or more per week. You don't need extra exercise or drastic food plans. You need accountability.
The challenges you face with working, busy social life, etc are no more challenging than the single parents, those that work multiple jobs, have physical limitations, etc. The fact that you try to turn these things into reasons you will fail is insulting to those who have many bigger issues to deal with and do so with quiet resolve, and are successful in reaching their weight loss goals
I agree with others OP. You don't need some magic food program so that you don't obsess over counting calories. You need to get help to overcome your tendency to make excuses, play the martyr, and constantly blame other people, systems and tools for why you aren't successful.
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