Motivation, Success and Frustration Sharing!

Rachel0778

@HGSmith0920 I'm with you there. I primarily do my grocery shopping at Aldi (discount grocer) and it saves me $20/week! Good luck on the interview, I bet you'll do great!

@desertathletegirl Welcome!

@gemwolf110 Congrats on the upcoming grad degree, what are you looking to pursue?

Welcome @adelinue!

@gymprincess1234 I love Old Navy workout clothes! Their pants are so cheap and hold up so well!

So this weekend was awful. I binged on Saturday and felt SOOOOO sick. I haven't had a binge to that extreme in a long time. I have not been coping well with my emotions ever since we started the home buying process. There is a lot of anxiety that goes along with buying a home for me since my childhood home was lost in the 2008 financial crash and it's hard for me to have a lot of my assets tied up in something I could lose. I know that's not likely and I know my SO and I are in a strong financial position, but it doesn't take away the constant feeling of anxiety that is then bleeding into the rest of my life. I also had 2 birthday celebrations this week so there was A LOT of extra treats around and I just dove in headfirst. And of course seeing all my gorgeous friends made me feel so body insecure and feeling insecure just doesn't help anything.

Today is a new day and a new week. I cleaned out my cupboards and cooked a big batch of lentil soup for the week. I'm committed to focusing on me and my health and feeling healthy. I'm also going to start journaling again because I need to start feeling my feelings BEFORE I eat my feelings.

gymprincess1234

@Rachel0778 I'm very sorry to hear what you're going through. I had a similar 'episode', but you live and you learn, it's a new day. Journaling is a good thing, I write first thing in the morning and last thing in the evening.

HGSmith0920

@Rachel0778 I think the interview went really well. We talked for 40 minutes! Mostly about my different jobs and the different experience I had. It was kind of funny though because we also talked about my previous job at Wawa(a VERY very popular convenience store here in NJ). He asked me all kinds of questions about the things we did and how we did them. I gave him a whole bunch of insider knowledge. I love when people ask me questions that I can go deep into. Lol. I mean I worked there for 8.5 years and was a shift manager. I sure as hell better know what I'm talking about. Lol. And I was honest and open about the fraud I was caught up in that caused me to lose my previous bank job. I didn't want to hide it from him. Can you imagine if I had lied to him about the reason I left and he found out? So long any chance at that bank! Lol. I'm hoping something comes of this. I dont know why, but I feel like this particular bank would be a really good place for me. So we'll see. Lol. Keep your fingers crossed for me! I'm so sorry you're having a terrible time with the house buying process. My parents own 16 acres in NJ and they almost lost it in 08 because their mortgage doubled. They were lucky though because that was right around the time that Daddy got a promotion so by the grace of God they were able to keep it and have been doing pretty well now as well. I hope once it's all finished that you will be anxiety free. Anxiety is terrible. I suffered from it for many years and only really got a handle on it through medication. It kind of comes hand in hand with my illness. Keep you're chin up and breathe through. Remember that it will end. It is just a passing moment. Your life is not over and this will not last forever!

gymprincess1234

@HGSmith0920 Fingers crossed for you!

My weekend has been an emotional roller coaster, hate PMS, it makes me like a bomb ready to explode. Had 2 overindulging days and now 2 days back in deficit and 2 workouts in these 4 days. Was getting so much better and then the stupid hormones hit me! I fear my state of mind if I'll get pregnant one day!
To distract myself at least I am very productive, house hunting, doing my course work, keeping house clean and tidy, answering old emails,etc.

Evamutt

Rachel0778, I know what you mean about having an experience that really effected you & it still effects you today when reminded about it, I have many of those. I hope you'll have peace as time passes & nothing bad happens. It's so good to own your own home. I'm still about the same with the pneumonia. Finished the last antibiotic today. Really hope I get over this & get back to my life & have more time.

Rachel0778

@HGSmith0920 I'm so glad the interview went well! And it's good that you were upfront. I'll be honest, I'm curious on the fraud story but I would understand if you don't want to share it.

@gymprincess1234 Thank you for your kind words. And PMS is THE WORST! I hope distracting yourself works

@Evamutt I hope you recover quickly too! And I also hope I have more peace as more time passes. My SO and I are way more financially stable than my parents ever were and we bought a home well within our budget so that even if one of us lost a job the other could still cover the mortgage, but it's still stressful.

Happy Tuesday! I'm feeling much more body confident today. It's amazing how much who you are around affects how you feel about your own body. Jealousy is absolutely a thing. I definitely need to focus more on body love and less on picking apart what I don't like about my body. I'll always have cellulite and stretch marks, they are a part of who I am and that's nothing to feel bad about.

I also decided to give my notice at the rescue. I love walking the dogs, but I am just feeling really overextended. Especially with grad school starting soon I need to take some time for myself. I also need to focus on my own two dogs since I constantly feel like I am not giving them enough time or attention.

rachelcalsbeek

@HGSmith0920 Good luck with the job! I hope it all pans out for you.

@Rachel0778 I'm glad you're feeling body confident today! I totally feel you on the jealousy and picking your body apart. As I've lost weight, I feel like I've found new things to dislike about my body, rather than focusing on the parts of my body that I love. And good for you for realizing you are overextended and taking time for yourself. It's always something you can revisit down the road, if you have more time and energy for it!

I'm feeling kind of meh this week. I finished last week with 1 day at the gym. Tuesdays are like my Monday with my workout plan, so I am getting back to it tonight. I am tired, but I just have to do it. Even though my weight is low, I feel fluffy, and I always feel better once I've lifted.

Are you all doing anything for Valentine's Day? My husband and I both work late tomorrow night, so we're celebrating on Thursday. We normally just do dinner, but we have some extra stuff to celebrate this year, so I booked us a couple's massage as a surprise for him. After that, we're going to cook dinner at home together, and I got a strawberry rhubarb pie for dessert. I assume we'll watch a movie or Netflix after that. I'm excited for a relaxing night!

gymprincess1234

Seems like everyone had a hard week! Hope this one is better, it definitely is for me!

I'm single and in my culture Valentine's is seen as a commercial thing borrowed from Americans, so had forgotten it's tomorrow.


I've cut my kcal to 1200kcal this week, will test if I can do this, if not, I will go back to 1300kcal. Or maybe I will do 1200kcal and 1300kcal on PMS weeks, switch it up. Haven't figured it out, but feel like I am losing about 200-300g per week, but would like 0,5kg loss like before. Might have to start not-eating workout kcal back or walk more.

The cold is real this week, at least I know I am losing weight, but I'm so cold !!

HGSmith0920

@Rachel0778 Pretty much, a woman came in with a fraudulent check and my manager waved it through saying she was okay to cash it(why, I have no idea) but I did it. Then the woman came in a couple more times and she waved her through again so after I while I just assumed that she was good. This woman even tried to open a checking account with my manager with a fraudulent check but couldn't because she owed another bank $900. She had managed to get her employer's checkbook and was cashing checks against it. She did this at two other branches. One of them turned her away and the other one did one but her away the next time. Between me and the other tellers we cashed something like 7 checks for her. Her employer eventually came in to inquire about all the money he was missing from his account and they figured out what was wrong. I was pretty much the scapegoat for my manager. I was the last one hired so it fell on my head. I mean I'm partially to blame because I wasn't as stringent enough in my observation of the check because the signature that was on the front of the check was off. But I just assumed because my manager had waved her through that she was okay. I shouldn't have been so lax about it and I paid the price. The banker who interviewed me yesterday agreed that it wasn't all my fault and that my manager should have been held accountable too, but such is life. I'm pretty glad I'm out of there though because the branches I worked at were far away in a really high traffic area. It would take me forever to get home in the spring and fall and about twice as long in the summer. The branch was in a beach town about a mile from the beach and its part of the infamous Jersey Shore. There was only one road in and out of the town. Lol. I'm so glad that you are feeling better though! It's actually kind of funny that you bring up the jealous part. My close friends and I are all pretty overweight. So I dont often feel out of place beside them but I definitely do body shame myself. We have a sliding glass door in our living room and at night you can see your reflection so every time I catch a glance of myself in it I see a distorted image of myself and get really frustrated.

@rachelcalsbeek The DH has to work until 4 so I'm gonna make him one of his favorite dinners and then make him a dessert in my crockpot. A cake/brownie thing that is amazing. And I got a carton of peanut butter ice cream that he loves and some Magic Shell so I make it a la mode for him. And everything I'm making minus the ice cream and shell are both low-er calorie meals. I have no idea what he's getting me. He is an absolutely terrible gift giver. Lol. I usually have to tell him what to get me for holidays and things. So I told him to get me flowers. I dont care where they come from or what kind they are. I just want flowers. Lol. So we'll see if he comes through. Lol. Then the rest of the night will probably be spent on the couch watching hockey or something, which I really like to do.


I had a GREAT day so far today. I met with one of my best friends and her son for breakfast. We only just reconnected in January after about 10 years apart and it's so awesome to have her in my life again. She was there for a REALLY tough time in my life. She was a steadying force when my life went upside down. We have a standing date to meet for breakfast and a chat once a week. I'm also seeing her on Friday and introducing her to my DH. They have never met(obviously). But I'm excited. I tell each so many stories about the other and I just want them to meet so that they can put faces to names. Lol. I went to the gym, got blood drawn, went to the library to do some writing and put dinner in the crockpot. Lol. I'm gonna hop in the shower now. But I'm having an awesome day! Lol. I hope everyone else is too!

HGSmith0920

gymprincess1234 wrote: »

Seems like everyone had a hard week! Hope this one is better, it definitely is for me!

I'm single and in my culture Valentine's is seen as a commercial thing borrowed from Americans, so had forgotten it's tomorrow.


I've cut my kcal to 1200kcal this week, will test if I can do this, if not, I will go back to 1300kcal. Or maybe I will do 1200kcal and 1300kcal on PMS weeks, switch it up. Haven't figured it out, but feel like I am losing about 200-300g per week, but would like 0,5kg loss like before. Might have to start not-eating workout kcal back or walk more.

The cold is real this week, at least I know I am losing weight, but I'm so cold !!

I'm so sorry it's so cold for you. It's pretty frigid here too. It kind of seeps into your bones. I generally dont eat back my exercise calories and sometimes I have to eat more than I actually want to so I'm not in the "danger" zone(less than 1000 calories) because I eat a lot of low-calorie things. I'm a pretty bland eater throughout the day and I like to mix things up for dinner because I like to keep the DH on his toes but I'm usually pretty good about portions and things. I'm trying to lose 1.5lbs a week to see how that feels. So hopefully something happens.

gymprincess1234

HGSmith0920 wrote: »

gymprincess1234 wrote: »

Seems like everyone had a hard week! Hope this one is better, it definitely is for me!

I'm single and in my culture Valentine's is seen as a commercial thing borrowed from Americans, so had forgotten it's tomorrow.


I've cut my kcal to 1200kcal this week, will test if I can do this, if not, I will go back to 1300kcal. Or maybe I will do 1200kcal and 1300kcal on PMS weeks, switch it up. Haven't figured it out, but feel like I am losing about 200-300g per week, but would like 0,5kg loss like before. Might have to start not-eating workout kcal back or walk more.

The cold is real this week, at least I know I am losing weight, but I'm so cold !!

I'm so sorry it's so cold for you. It's pretty frigid here too. It kind of seeps into your bones. I generally dont eat back my exercise calories and sometimes I have to eat more than I actually want to so I'm not in the "danger" zone(less than 1000 calories) because I eat a lot of low-calorie things. I'm a pretty bland eater throughout the day and I like to mix things up for dinner because I like to keep the DH on his toes but I'm usually pretty good about portions and things. I'm trying to lose 1.5lbs a week to see how that feels. So hopefully something happens.

1000kcal wow, you must be losing pounds like crazy ! Or you don't have much to lose?

gymprincess1234

I think this Valentine's is for self love for me! I was the only one at the gym, so shamelessly checked myself out from all angles. I have to say for the first time in my ENTIRE life, I like how I look. I do jiggle, have cellulite and some rolls that shouldn't be there, but I am so proud for getting my mindset back on track already 1,5month ! In November and December I felt like this is it, I will be stuck, but proved myself wrong and the comeback has been stronger than ever!
I remember when I first hit the -50lbs, I cried cause I was so upset that with the new body there still was no newfound body confidence. Now it blows my mind, that it's starting to grow!

Yesterday was the first day at 1200kcals. I know I won't go lower, cause it's not healthy, but it felt very doable. Probably won't do it during PMS weeks, but now, on a normal one, it felt sustainable. I don't know, if it's the Olympics and seeing all the hard work athletes put in themselves, I feel super determined to get closer to the goal in the next 1,5month

HGSmith0920

@gymprincess1234 I'm so glad that you are gaining more confidence. I know I am as my belly shrinks. I'm glad that you were able to find 1200 doable. I think I might go down to that soon. To at least try it for a week, to see if I can do it. Lol. So onward and upward to our next goals!

So I stepped on the scale this morning with much trepidation remembering how much it said on Monday. Turns out I must have lost most of the water weight because I lost 4lbs in 2 days. Lol. I also weighed in before coffee this morning so that might have helped as well. Lol. It just feels so good to be able to look at the scale and see the numbers going down again! I was so discouraged when I saw that I had gone up that far. But now I am under my first goal again and 1lb away from where I was last Monday. I hope I keep losing it again. I remember that it was hard when I first started. The weight came off so slowly but now it seems to be coming off a lot easier. Probably because I dont eat as much as I was back then. I mean I still eat just not as much as I was and I very rarely eat back my exercise calories now. I dont know what it will be like when I start working again but for right now this seems to have done the trick. Lol

I hope everyone is having a great day!

gymprincess1234

HGSmith0920 wrote: »

@gymprincess1234 I'm so glad that you are gaining more confidence. I know I am as my belly shrinks. I'm glad that you were able to find 1200 doable. I think I might go down to that soon. To at least try it for a week, to see if I can do it. Lol. So onward and upward to our next goals!

So I stepped on the scale this morning with much trepidation remembering how much it said on Monday. Turns out I must have lost most of the water weight because I lost 4lbs in 2 days. Lol. I also weighed in before coffee this morning so that might have helped as well. Lol. It just feels so good to be able to look at the scale and see the numbers going down again! I was so discouraged when I saw that I had gone up that far. But now I am under my first goal again and 1lb away from where I was last Monday. I hope I keep losing it again. I remember that it was hard when I first started. The weight came off so slowly but now it seems to be coming off a lot easier. Probably because I dont eat as much as I was back then. I mean I still eat just not as much as I was and I very rarely eat back my exercise calories now. I dont know what it will be like when I start working again but for right now this seems to have done the trick. Lol

I hope everyone is having a great day!

Congrats on the loss! How much do you want to lose total?

gymprincess1234

Measured myself today and the 6 week result is -1cm off chest, hips, waist and -0,5cm of thighs. I could have squeezed the tape a bit more for better results, but I think that knowing I can do that is reassuring enough. In the upcoming weeks I will have bigger numbers lost.
As I don't have a scale and next time will step on one in 2,5months, it's so encouraging to see some progress!

HGSmith0920

@gymprincess1234 I have 30 more lbs to lose. I've already lost 30!

rachelcalsbeek

@gymprincess1234 I am still working on feeling good with my "new" body. I thought once I lost the weight I wanted that my body confidence issues would be solved. And they basically are, when I'm dressed. But when I see myself at home, I can always pick out new flaws. I am really happy with my progress, and I want to love myself as I am. My biggest thing right now is my boobs. They are a lot smaller now that I've lost the weight, and they sag a little. It makes me really self conscious at times. I am working on my mindset!

@HGSmith0920 I'm glad your weight is back to normal! If I have a cheat day, I generally don't weigh for 2 days afterwards, because I know it will be inflated. Then if I've gained, I know it's real weight and not water weight.

I got to the gym last night, and I'm happy to be starting the week strong. I work at my second job tonight, and tomorrow is a scheduled cheat day (I even prelogged everything ) for our Valentine's Day celebration. But I am back to the gym Friday and all weekend. I like working out on Saturdays and Sundays. It helps to ease the temptation of overeating those days.

gymprincess1234

@rachelcalsbeek it's a work in progress. Took me 24 year of living and more than a year of weight loss to start liking how I look! I so get you about the different feeling when being dressed and naked. That's why I do a lot of strenght training to be toned and definitely will have implants one day, my boobs just deflated and now look semi-decent only during PMS



I'm having such an amazing day, spring break starts tomorrow, Canadian sun is finally making appearance and found these amazing 80kcal fudge ice cream lollies, that I'm obsessed with! One last midterm and the holidays can start, woohoo!

Rachel0778

@HGSmith0920 What a frustrating situation! You definitely should not be blamed for that occurring. Congrats on the loss!

@rachelcalsbeek How was your Valentines Day cheat day? And I feel you with picking apart everything. Even when I'm at my smallest I still think in my head that I should be even smaller.

@gymprincess1234 I hope you have a wonderful holiday break from school! I agree with Valentine's Day being self love day

@gemwolf110 Happy belated Valentine's Day!

Well today is officially back to the regular grind. Yesterday I decided to take a self love day off. I spent it reading on the couch, going to crossfit, going hiking with a girlfriend, and having a decadent dinner with my SO. It felt so good to reset and just take a day to myself. I debating taking today too but that seemed like a bit much. Instead today I'm going out to lunch with coworkers and hitting up a dance class after work. This weekend my SO will be in Michigan so I'll be flying solo. Other than a volunteer event and cleaning the house I've got nothing planned which will be nice!

gymprincess1234

Thank you, @Rachel0778 !


So happy, I have 10 days off, with my 4 day trip to US in the middle. And I don't even have any assignments due after, so it really is a holiday.
I'm planning to tourist around a bit, read books, go to gym earlier and take long walks to the ocean.


Also today marks 6 weeks back at tracking and deficit! Time flies!! I think this will take the whole year to get to maintenance and my GW, but so be it, not taking other 6 months of stagnation ever again.