WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR FEBRUARY 2016
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Call me crazy but I love to see other people happy and succeeding .
Good Morning Ladies,
Margaret, thanks for sharing. I hope the positive that you received from your experience will stay with you for a long time.
Welcome to all the newbies. Please tell us about yourself and your journey so far. We appreciate if you will sign each post with the name you want to be called. A location is great, also, general or specific.
Kay, glad you got the workout you all wanted today. I agree that you should tell her what you want. All she can do is say no and keep on with her plan.
Vicki, NE, when you ask, I try to come through for you. You know you can eat right, so get with it, girl.
Terri, you are right that sportsmanship has to be taught and demonstrated. Your Spa visit sounds heavenly. You enjoy!!!
Kristan, I don’t know any way that anyone can delete a post. Are you sure you clicked on “Post Reply” after you typed it in? That is the only thing I can think of. We welcome everyone’s comments.
Joyce, sending prayers for your sister. I hope the time won’t make a difference. I still haven’t downloaded Windows 10.
Betty, so sorry you are suffering and sad. Try meditation to help clear your mind. Our adult children can cause us such grief. Sending happy vibes!!!! ((((Hugs))))
Gayle, so sorry that you have been so sick. Sending healing thought and prayers for a speedy recovery. (((Hugs)))
Allie, I’m just glad you didn’t sleep in your car!!!
Rosie, congrats on your loss!!! Doesn’t it feel great? Good luck on the new hairdresser. It sometimes takes them two or three times to really get the feel for your hair. I know having her closer would be nice.
Heather, I have had problems remembering names of people and things for many years also. DH makes fun of me for the terms I come up with when trying to describe things or events. The thing is, I get the message across even when I don’t use the right word.
Sylvia, it’s so exciting that you are getting close on the co-op. I hope things go smoothly!
KJ, one of my best memories of my Mom is her always whistling or humming while she cooked or cleaned. I’ve never been good at whistling and she did it so naturally that she didn’t even realize she was doing it. Gosh, do you go through that with your “bigger baby” each morning? He must be a sound sleeper..
Margaret, I hope the meditation helps.
Cheri, I’m glad you feel less alone in your journey. I hope you know we are always here for support. If it helps, please share more often. We are here for you. ((((Hugs))))
Debbie, welcome. You will find this a wonderful place for support and information. Changing our lives is what this is all about. Most of us have tried diets over the years and know they don’t work long term. Please tell us a bit more about yourself to help us get to know you and sign each post with the name you want to be called. Come often.
Terrie, you scored at Kohls even though you didn’t get what you went for. Hopefully they will get some in soon.
Katla, love your new shoes, darling! Thanks for sharing.
I made my chicken pot pie last night and thought it was good. For some reason that he couldn’t put his finger on, DH was not that crazy about it. Oh well. I have line dancing today so will venture out in the rainy day. I hope all of you have a healthy and happy day.
Words I live by:
Savor. I have to slow down and savor every bite.
and
Opportunity. Each day offers new opportunities for good health and happiness if we just look for them and choose them.
I Love you,
DJ
Myrtle Beach, SC
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Making progress on the housework this AM. Dried two loads of clothes, steam cleaned the kitchen floor, vacuumed the house, and now making a pot of potato soup. The Pom did not want to walk in the rain so I don't know how we will handle the doing your business thing. Hopefully later in the day.
Kristin ~ So glad you are healing after the divorce and admire you for taking a road trip alone.
Terri ~ Hope your arthritis pain goes away so you can get in some exercise.
Kim ~ You are so talented to create a dining space that looks great.
Katla ~ Love the cartoon. My DIL wears thongs and when I tried to help do a load of wash for her, it was very strange to see these little pieces of nothing.
Carol0 -
DamitJanit wrote: »Call me crazy but I love to see other people happy and succeeding .
Cheri, I’m glad you feel less alone in your journey. I hope you know we are always here for support. If it helps, please share more often. We are here for you. ((((Hugs))))
Words I live by:
Savor. I have to slow down and savor every bite.
and
Opportunity. Each day offers new opportunities for good health and happiness if we just look for them and choose them.
I Love you,
DJ
Myrtle Beach, SC
Thanks DJ. I have a hard time unburdening my woes/stresses/etc. I guess they are mine and mine alone.
Comes from my childhood and growing up. Raised by an angry and depressed mother who had 5 kids in a very short time period and a workaholic husband. So you did NOT say much when mom was in her mood which surprisingly was just about always. Cause saying something led to .... nothing except perhaps a much more angry and depressed mother. So I was your exceptionally excellent child always giving in to smooth the waters. And here
I am in a marriage of 32 years doing the same thing as to not upset the Asperger's apple cart of my husband. We have been through a lot. Love each other immensely. But boy is it a test of my patience. I could go on but.....for now I will let it sit and know that you are all here for me. THANK YOU FOR YOUR PRESENCE IN MY LIFE LADIES!
Cheri in Fairlawn oHIo0 -
Stronglifts Rest Day
Goblet squats-3X7X 30
Russian kettle bell swing-22X 10 X 30
I was able to do all 22 kettle bell swing sets at 10 reps today. Yay! That means that the next time I do this I will transitioning to the 35 pound kettle bell five sets at a time.
I am also starting a one week challenge of push-ups. Today I am going to start with five sets of 10. I will be adding an extra set each day until on the sixth day (Sunday) we will be doing 100 push-ups. Join me if you want to give yourself an extra push(up) this week!
Mary from Minnesota0 -
Hi gals,
Sylvia – great gallery plans – you will be part of the re-vitalization of you town!
Joyce – sending good thoughts to you and your sister
Katla – LOLOLOLOL
Kristian – if you ever get back to CA – I’d love to have you over – I have a guest room and a pop up dining room LOL
Cheri – some one else here has a DH with Aspergers….. hmmm is it Teri?
Mary – I am so impressed, I can’t do even 1 push up.
Last night went great! Everyone seemed to like the tent and the meal. The dishes were done before bed and the walls are off the tent this morning, but I have a 10 -1 commitment, so will not finish dismantling it until this afternoon.
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KJ - I am barely 5 ft 5. At high school, before I went to uni I was between 115 lbs and 124 lbs. I married at 20 weighing 124. I aimed for a goal in the middle of the healthy range, around 23 BMI . According to some authorities it is better for bone health to be nearer the top of the healthy range when you are older. Also, if you have put on muscle through weights etc you will be smaller in size at a higher weight. My dress size is a British 12 (sometimes a 14 for my broad shoulders) which is US 8/10. I am happy with my figure, but a couple more pounds off my waist would not hurt. I dislike the texture of my skin, which is wrinkly and bobbly, but I am 66, so I'm not going in for Miss World. :bigsmile:
I lost 57 lbs to get to 140. It took me 19 months. I have kept it off for over 2 years. I log every day and do 600 calories of exercise each morning. I eat up to 1800 calories a day.
Went out to get my hair trimmed and to buy some groceries, mainly salad and veg. Also visited the fishmonger and spent a ridiculous amount on fish to go into the bottle of French fish soup I bought. Prawns, scallops, cod and fresh tuna. Having it with a blob of rouille, grated cheese and croutons for DH that are in the freezer. Easy and quick, but not cheap.
Watching a tv series tonight that I go up to our bedroom to watch as it's too violent for DH. He is very sensitive, so I prefer to watch anything a bit challenging on my own. We are still ploughing through the stuff I recorded while the family was here. DDIL severely limits the grandchildren's tv viewing, only allowing them to watch 30 mins of specified young children's programmes before bedtime. They can choose in turn.
I have my TROLL HUNTER to watch when DH is out one day. And another Norwegian film waiting in my Amazon basket.
Love to all. Sending love and hugs to the strugglers.
Heather UK0 -
godmomkim - very Purdy!!!
I always knew what people call flip flops, sandles or thongs as chanklas (Spanish word) I never knew what people called them in English. so all of the American words are foreign to me, lololol.
today when I ran on the treadmill, I didn't use any hands... by that I mean, for years when I run (on the treadmill) I run with one hand on the treadmill cuz I run with my eyes closed (so I don't fall off) and just listen to the music. I have been doing that for years and no, I don't recommend anybody here trying it. I will say that when I bump it up to a higher speed, I open my eyes and use my arms for full concentration. buy anyway, did it w/o any hands so I had to keep my eyes open all the time. now I know why I started closing my eyes to begin with. :0/0 -
Kim, your dining room looks awesome with the candles and the place settings and the salads.
Kristan, I told your story about your ex to my husband and he called him a bad name.....I'm so happy to hear that you were able to forgive him and be cordial to him so you can be good parents together. It has been my experience that forgiveness is freeing,
Mary, I had thought about trying pushups again and seeing if the neuropathy in my legs would be a problem. The last time I did pushups was at least six months ago and I did them with my hands on the seat of a sturdy dining room chair. I don't know if I'll join your challenge, but I'm thinking about trying pushups and some variation of the goblet squats and kettle bell swings without the kettle bells.
My friend who usually comes over at 10:30 on Tuesday mornings has cancelled so I have some extra time.....I hope to use it wisely.
Barbie from beautiful chilly NW Washington
My word for 2016 is "alacrity"....I will greet all experiences in my life with cheerful readiness
“The secret of contentment is knowing how to enjoy what you have, and to be able to lose all desire for things beyond your reach."-- Yutang Lin
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Kim - missed your pics so I had to scroll back. Looks splendid! Love the lights. Lighting is everything. I have string lights in the kitchen/diner, blue ones around the window, heart ones on a shelf, normal ones inside the wood burner with red crepe paper. My DGC wanted them on even for early breakfast! :drinker:
Fish soup was stunning. Thought DH was going to have an orgasm. :bigsmile:
Tomorrow the car is going to be serviced. It's its second time since new. Because we bought it new the garage comes and picks it up, services it, cleans it and brings it back to the house again. Service! ! !
Love Heather UK0 -
Kim and Barbie - any type of push-up would do wall push-ups, modified push-ups even a plank! Maybe just something different than you do now added to this week. For those of you that are on a plateau this is a good way to change it up and move through it.
Kim- your party room looked fantastic! Glad everything went well for you last night!
Mary from Minnesota0 -
Kim, just lovely.
Cheri and the other person married to a guy on the autism spectrum. I just read a great book on autism that you HAVE to read! It is called Neurotribes, and goes in to the history of the diagnosis and "treatment" over the last two centuries. I have a brother on the spectrum but never diagnosed, and it really helped me when I realized what he was good at and what he sucked at and adjusted my expectations accordingly. This book goes in to a lot of detail about the different "symptoms" one might see, how each individual in the spectrum is unique, and how the disability isn't in the person as much as in society's inability to make accommodations (something the general disability advocacy and the mental health advocacy communities have been saying for a long time). It talks about how much people with this way of learning and thinking are important to our society, much as Kay Redfield Jamison's book, Touched with Fire, does for mood disorders. Two of my three sons would probably be diagnosed on the spectrum now too. It mentioned that toe walking is a marker trait- my former husband, my oldest son and my grandson are all toewalkers! So my grandson may be on the spectrum too. All are very bright people. Anyway, I highly recommend running out and buying a copy, or at least getting it from your local library (the Iowa City library had five copies at least!).0 -
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miriamwithcats wrote: »Kim, just lovely.
Cheri and the other person married to a guy on the autism spectrum. I just read a great book on autism that you HAVE to read! It is called Neurotribes, and goes in to the history of the diagnosis and "treatment" over the last two centuries. I have a brother on the spectrum but never diagnosed, and it really helped me when I realized what he was good at and what he sucked at and adjusted my expectations accordingly. This book goes in to a lot of detail about the different "symptoms" one might see, how each individual in the spectrum is unique, and how the disability isn't in the person as much as in society's inability to make accommodations (something the general disability advocacy and the mental health advocacy communities have been saying for a long time). It talks about how much people with this way of learning and thinking are important to our society, much as Kay Redfield Jamison's book, Touched with Fire, does for mood disorders. Two of my three sons would probably be diagnosed on the spectrum now too. It mentioned that toe walking is a marker trait- my former husband, my oldest son and my grandson are all toewalkers! So my grandson may be on the spectrum too. All are very bright people. Anyway, I highly recommend running out and buying a copy, or at least getting it from your local library (the Iowa City library had five copies at least!).
Thanks for the recommendation. I'll look into the book. As someone who worked in the public elementary schools for 8 years as an Instructional Assistant in Resource I fully understand "when I realized what he was good at and what he sucked at and adjusted my expectations accordingly" as I did this with all my little students on my own and as a part of their IEP. My husband and daughter are both extremely intelligent. My daughter referred to herself throughout her school career as "twice blessed" - gifted and disabled! The question my husband and I grapple with at periodic intervals is how much I should accommodate "who he is" and how much he should accommodate "who I am" being the nuerotypical in the relationship. It is not an equal equation. And then when we all get together it's me running around accommodating each of them and my son (who has no tolerance for his father or sister) and it is stressful and mentally/emotionally exhausting. AND neither of the 3 of them remotely understand the stress they "inadvertently" put me under just by being who they are...oy vey!
I'm going to go look for the book right now! Love your take on things Miriam as you are so well versed!
Cheri Fairlawn oHIo0 -
Mary – I do pushups at my desk, so I’m not on the floor, but at an angle that my hand pain can tolerate. Today I did 22 pushups, but I will join you. How many do I do tomorrow?
Kim – Not this Terri. My husband has traumatic brain injury from getting hit by the school bus in first grade. That definitely creates its own problems, and I admit that I am not always as tolerant as I could be about his challenges. Especially when it is something that negatively affects my Dad, and dad makes sure to tell me how much it is bothering him. I hate being in the middle like that. They are both so alike and so opposite at the same time.
Not that I expect anyone to be, but if you are interested, here are 2 Websites to view DS's current status in bowling situations:
http://www.wihsbowlclub.com/districtStandPage.php?id=1
http://www.metromilwaukeeusbcyouth.org/tournament-standings-.html
His name is Payne Fakler. We only have 3 more tournaments left for this "season"; Pepsi Regionals March 19, State April 15 - 17, and Junior Gold in Indianapolis in July. He didn't do well this past weekend at the H.S. singles tournament, but I guess we'll keep him anyway I love seeing him coach his friends.
Now, back to the ice pack on my hands.
Hugs Again ! ! !
Terri in Milwaukee0 -
@Katla49 Once when I was at my resort pool I had my flip-flops stolen! (Well someone took mine, while I was in the conversation pool) I was able to borrow another friends flip flops, but it was a wee bit awkward trying to explain THAT to my husband because the acquaintance was a dude. I found them the next day though!
Have you every FLOPPED out of your flip flops? THAT is so embarrassing! I seem to always look behind me, like what WAS that, that tripped me...ooooh it was my own stupidity!! hahahaha!
Becca
clumsy in Oregon0 -
Kim - sounds good!
Barbie- I agree that forgiveness is freeing.
Heather - I may need that recipe!
Miriamwithcats - I will look for the book as well. My son was a toe walker for years and I've long suspected.0 -
Terri- tomorrow I add a Nother set so it will be six sets of 10. However do as much as you can.
Mary from Minnesota0 -
Another one with an Aspie DH. Although he has not been diagnosed, my DGS has, and they are two peas in a pod. Thanks, Miriam, for the book recommendation. I will check into it. Another one that has absolutely nothing to do with Autism, but describes mine and DH's differences fairly well is the one on love languages. We have totally different love languages. He feels loved when I do things for him like cook, clean, fetch. I feel loved when I am told so and touched. He could go weeks with no hugs and kisses and be just fine, but he takes it personally when I leave a dirty glass in the living room. We do have some things in common, like our love for walking, reading, puzzles, organization, and our grandkids, but in so many things we are different, especially foods. I like scrambled eggs, he likes fried. I like spaghetti and meat sauce, he likes meatballs. I like sausage patties, he likes links. I could go on and on.
I did trim and tone with the 9:00 a.m. Class today. My instructor was still out sick. I'm going to do weights again tomorrow instead of her breathing. I have so much more energy when I do the weights. I went to Walmart afterward and got three workout tops, but I'm going to take two of them back. One is too tight and the other is uncomfortable around the neck and not flattering. The other fit just right! It is neon yellow and matches some pants I already had that were yellow and blue.0 -
Dr Katie, if I wore neon yellow, I would look like a school bus! LOL
Yes, you are describing one of the differences of neurotypicals (so cool that Cheri has the lingo!) vs Autism spectrum individuals. I constantly say that I had to learn to not depend on my brother for emotional support- it is just beyond him, but if my air conditioner is broken or I need to borrow money, he is right there showing how much he cares. When I talked to him about how I felt, he would try so hard to "listen" but his face would be totally flat and all he could say was "okay" over and over and over again. What is funny is we were so close growing up. But I thought he walked on water! Younger sister! So I didn't realize he was "different". I am a pleasant blend of both sides (or maybe unpleasant to some?) - loved and did very well in math and sciences, but chose to go in to human development/ mental health because THAT was where I didn't "get it" and had to actually work hard to learn!0 -
Z0
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Mary - I can do 6 sets of 10, but can't even imagine doing 60 in a row without stopping. I'm going to do a set of 10 before bouncing on my ball, then "jump in with both feet" tomorrow. Yay ! ! !0
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I'm back in the swing of things. That was a nasty cold (not totally gone yet). Now...to stay healthy for a while!
30 min P90X3 and 40 min on the elliptical.
No way I can keep up with this thread
Fingers crossed for tomorrow -- I have an "offer discussion" call for a new job. I'm not planning on anything until I have an offer in hand.
(p.s. I'm happy today because my husband got referred to a sleep clinic!)
Kimses in MA0 -
Holy cow..maybe bratty boy is on the spectrum.. Could be the furnace guy calls him anal with a capital A.. And he does have alot of the traits that alot of you are speaking of.but I will tell you right now he won't do a think about it0
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I would just like to say that one of the nicest writers on here is DJ in Myrtle Beach--DJ you always know how say the right thing to people! I feel like if I ever met you you would have a visible aura or something similar! Thanks for being so encouraging.
Also what is this about toe walkers and the spectrum? Is that in that Neuotribes book? Must read!!!!! I had a toe walker...
Betty0 -
((((((HUGS)))))) for all those with difficult husbands.
Heather UK0 -
I am trying to break my sugar habit. My mind is willing but my spirit - especially at work - is weak. Had a whole bakery donut today and am so disappointed in myself. Here we are near dinner time and I only have 197 calories left to eat. Sigh. Anyome out there who has kicked the sugar addition?
Natalie0 -
Betty: I agree with you. DJ is a wonderful person. :flowerforyou: Heather: I'm taking the liberty of assuming the hugs go to all of the women with husbands. Thanks! :devil:0
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grandmallie wrote: »Holy cow..maybe bratty boy is on the spectrum.. Could be the furnace guy calls him anal with a capital A.. And he does have alot of the traits that alot of you are speaking of.but I will tell you right now he won't do a think about it
I've remained quiet on the topic of your hubby. He does seem like he has Asperger's type behaviors. My husband refused marriage counseling. I got him to go. Thankfully the therapist was a great one for him. He refused medication. Got him to try it once and got very ill and that went out the window forever. He has made many behavioral changes for the better and it is something he works on all the time. He went from a man who raged about everything that was wrong, going from 1 to 1000 in seconds leaving the kids cowering behind me, appearing to be the most selfish person I could have ever chosen to be married to, estranged from any and all family members (while being best pals with coworkers) to someone entirely different once diagnosed and having these behaviors explained to him as they appear to neurotypical people-like his wife and kids.
It is a daily fixture in our lives:
...gets up from chair, announces he's going to bed, climbs the stairs and is done with his day without a thought as to how it appears to me....I call after him "good night, love you"...he sheepishly returns to the room gives a kiss and says goodnight.
....parks car in store lot, gets out, stands with back to car and key in hand.....sometimes I sit there to see how long it will take him to realize I haven't gotten out of the car yet....his thought process is "I am going to Sam's Club. I have parked the car. I got out. Time to shop." Very over focused on purpose at the moment.
....went out to his car to take dog to get nails trimmed today, car wouldn't turn on, battery dead, gets out of car sputtering a slue of $%^^&* words inappropriate for the event occurring at the moment, leaves me and dog sitting in car wondering what he's planning as he goes back in house.....
I love him to death, will stand by him forever, but it is a trial living with someone with Asperger's. It's like living the title of a great book on the subject "Alone Together".
I had a huge decision to make back when we went for marriage counseling and WE chose to stay together because the diagnosis explained all that was/had gone on with him and his behaviors/thought processes for so many years. An aha moment to say the least. But from that time forward I started putting me first and had he not initiated changes I was gone.
This weekend ( as he does periodically) he announced we weren't right for each other and he wasn't meeting my needs and I wasn't meeting his....I smiled and said okay then I'll help you pack a bag....I told him what did he expect me to say yet again to this pronouncement...he sulked all weekend and gave me his typical silent treatment...it hurts yes but through therapy I have learned how to hurt less....Monday morning he comes to me with a smile and says he going to keep me and off he went to continue his job search....my life with an Aspie husband. Oy Vey!
Cheri hanging in there in Aspie Land
Fairlawn oHIo
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