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RomaineCalm wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »Tankiscool wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I sabotage myself from ever getting 100% caught up at work and home because I can’t face the existential crisis that comes with realizing it was the process that fulfilled me and not the completion. I’m terrified to find myself asking “what now? what was it all for?”
Do you find yourself seeming to work "better" under pressure than?
Absolutely. Deadlines are my jam because it means all my regular work is being neglected and will have piled up so that it takes weeks to get through it.
This last Wednesday i set a goal to clean the entire house top to bottom. I was genuinely amused when i got to the last thing on my list because it was like I couldn’t help myself stalling. I started doing the thing finally, after about half a dozen “important” distractions, but ultimately found a way to make it way more difficult than it needed to be and didn’t finish it.
I think it’s all because I love working, i love my job, and i truly fear retirement. I’ve been stressing about it all week tbh
Edit: seriously. What do people do when work IS their happy place? I don’t really have hobbies or other things I’m really passionate about.
I wish I was this passionate about my job. I mean I like it overall but there are some days I leave crying from frustration. Maybe that’s not normal. Ha
So tell me what you live for. What gets you out of bed excited for the day? What makes the frustrating job worth dealing with?
This sounds horrible but people talk about spending time with their kids and stuff.. umm spending time with my kids is spent worrying about how badly I’m raising them. Thats my special mom-guilt time.1 -
Tankiscool wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »Tankiscool wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I sabotage myself from ever getting 100% caught up at work and home because I can’t face the existential crisis that comes with realizing it was the process that fulfilled me and not the completion. I’m terrified to find myself asking “what now? what was it all for?”
Do you find yourself seeming to work "better" under pressure than?
Absolutely. Deadlines are my jam because it means all my regular work is being neglected and will have piled up so that it takes weeks to get through it.
This last Wednesday i set a goal to clean the entire house top to bottom. I was genuinely amused when i got to the last thing on my list because it was like I couldn’t help myself stalling. I started doing the thing finally, after about half a dozen “important” distractions, but ultimately found a way to make it way more difficult than it needed to be and didn’t finish it.
I think it’s all because I love working, i love my job, and i truly fear retirement. I’ve been stressing about it all week tbh
Edit: seriously. What do people do when work IS their happy place? I don’t really have hobbies or other things I’m really passionate about.
You are in my brain! Either get in or help lol! I've been thinking of this as well. I love my job and have been extremely busy the past 6 months that we brought someone on to help me. The new person is slowly getting up to speed on stuff and I've been sabotaging myself at work by simply pushing things off and doing other crap. I am too young to say I "fear" retirement but I will tell you I don't think I'll ever fully retire if that's what you are getting at.
Neither do I. I have some hobbies but nothing I'm extremely passionate about. And it's not like I'm not motivated as well its typically that I'm motivated by work.
I suspect we have similar occupations1 -
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Keep_on_cardio wrote: »
I think those are fluffers6 -
caco_ethes wrote: »RomaineCalm wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »Tankiscool wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I sabotage myself from ever getting 100% caught up at work and home because I can’t face the existential crisis that comes with realizing it was the process that fulfilled me and not the completion. I’m terrified to find myself asking “what now? what was it all for?”
Do you find yourself seeming to work "better" under pressure than?
Absolutely. Deadlines are my jam because it means all my regular work is being neglected and will have piled up so that it takes weeks to get through it.
This last Wednesday i set a goal to clean the entire house top to bottom. I was genuinely amused when i got to the last thing on my list because it was like I couldn’t help myself stalling. I started doing the thing finally, after about half a dozen “important” distractions, but ultimately found a way to make it way more difficult than it needed to be and didn’t finish it.
I think it’s all because I love working, i love my job, and i truly fear retirement. I’ve been stressing about it all week tbh
Edit: seriously. What do people do when work IS their happy place? I don’t really have hobbies or other things I’m really passionate about.
I wish I was this passionate about my job. I mean I like it overall but there are some days I leave crying from frustration. Maybe that’s not normal. Ha
So tell me what you live for. What gets you out of bed excited for the day? What makes the frustrating job worth dealing with?
This sounds horrible but people talk about spending time with their kids and stuff.. umm spending time with my kids is spent worrying about how badly I’m raising them. Thats my special mom-guilt time.
I feel like this a lot, mainly due to my youngest being special needs and needs more assistance. I find myself constantly, envisioning what my older one feels and wish I had more patience with her ( I work hard on that daily). I do have moments, that remind me, I am doing a great job and that’s usually when I find her drawings from school. I just want both of them to be confident in themselves, live life with passion and be true to themselves.
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The_Devil_In_Miss_Jones_ wrote: »Keep_on_cardio wrote: »
I think those are fluffersThe_Devil_In_Miss_Jones_ wrote: »Keep_on_cardio wrote: »
I think those are fluffers
Straight up lol'd at this - well done2 -
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Keep_on_cardio wrote: »I believe that it is not possible to cure someone else who has mental health issues, they can only be guided and shown support
I believe depends on the level of mental illness. Theres depression and then there’s Schizophrenia, Personality Disorder’s, PTSD and others that bring on aggression. I’ve Seen so many tranquilized and appeared more human without medication. Then I’ve watched a calm over those, who desperately needed a chemical balance.
You cannot even use the word “cure” when it comes to mental health. Once you start using that word it implies that there is some norm or way we’re meant to behave or feel. You can only use objective measures such as if it is affecting someone’s work and relationships. Medication can literally save somebody’s life and its utility cannot be understated. It’s complicated but I think ultimately the change has to come within but meds and therapy can help guide someone to a better place of wellbeing.6 -
caco_ethes wrote: »I sabotage myself from ever getting 100% caught up at work and home because I can’t face the existential crisis that comes with realizing it was the process that fulfilled me and not the completion. I’m terrified to find myself asking “what now? what was it all for?”
Hugs lady
I've moved twice in the last 2 years and have paired down every single thing I own, got rid of almost all my stuff...except one box and 2 old laptops...its like I don't want to be "done"
...then what?
I used to have 3 days off in a row, but that was unhealthy for me...Im glad to go to work to have a 'norm' and 'schedule' even tho I want to call in sick every morning because I suck at mornings.
Its always Groundhog day for me, and it's good and sad at the same time.
I could go on way further, but I have to try to reign in my TMI posts...for now3 -
RomaineCalm wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »Tankiscool wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I sabotage myself from ever getting 100% caught up at work and home because I can’t face the existential crisis that comes with realizing it was the process that fulfilled me and not the completion. I’m terrified to find myself asking “what now? what was it all for?”
Do you find yourself seeming to work "better" under pressure than?
Absolutely. Deadlines are my jam because it means all my regular work is being neglected and will have piled up so that it takes weeks to get through it.
This last Wednesday i set a goal to clean the entire house top to bottom. I was genuinely amused when i got to the last thing on my list because it was like I couldn’t help myself stalling. I started doing the thing finally, after about half a dozen “important” distractions, but ultimately found a way to make it way more difficult than it needed to be and didn’t finish it.
I think it’s all because I love working, i love my job, and i truly fear retirement. I’ve been stressing about it all week tbh
Edit: seriously. What do people do when work IS their happy place? I don’t really have hobbies or other things I’m really passionate about.
I wish I was this passionate about my job. I mean I like it overall but there are some days I leave crying from frustration. Maybe that’s not normal. Ha
s
First year in my current job, I left and cried my eyes out, often...way too emotionally involved (which is and isn't a bad thing, I work with animals and people)
Now I sometimes have to do a "coffee run" to cry in my car (my preferred crying space) or just go to the bathroom and stand there to cry out of frustration at work (and for the record...Im not a crier, but in the last year Ive become one), sometimes. My job is relentless, sometimes, unless I can physically and mentally step away. And now it's sometimes personal too, not job related, Ive just become more emotional (which is good (I think)) I've been super closed off for a long time, even to myself.
Ha...ha, haaa
Just edited waay too much info before posting!!!!
(good job, Vikka!!. Im proud of me)4 -
caco_ethes wrote: »RomaineCalm wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »Tankiscool wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I sabotage myself from ever getting 100% caught up at work and home because I can’t face the existential crisis that comes with realizing it was the process that fulfilled me and not the completion. I’m terrified to find myself asking “what now? what was it all for?”
Do you find yourself seeming to work "better" under pressure than?
Absolutely. Deadlines are my jam because it means all my regular work is being neglected and will have piled up so that it takes weeks to get through it.
This last Wednesday i set a goal to clean the entire house top to bottom. I was genuinely amused when i got to the last thing on my list because it was like I couldn’t help myself stalling. I started doing the thing finally, after about half a dozen “important” distractions, but ultimately found a way to make it way more difficult than it needed to be and didn’t finish it.
I think it’s all because I love working, i love my job, and i truly fear retirement. I’ve been stressing about it all week tbh
Edit: seriously. What do people do when work IS their happy place? I don’t really have hobbies or other things I’m really passionate about.
I wish I was this passionate about my job. I mean I like it overall but there are some days I leave crying from frustration. Maybe that’s not normal. Ha
So tell me what you live for. What gets you out of bed excited for the day? What makes the frustrating job worth dealing with?
This sounds horrible but people talk about spending time with their kids and stuff.. umm spending time with my kids is spent worrying about how badly I’m raising them. Thats my special mom-guilt time.
I love you...youre honest and frank
I honestly think if I had kids (I don't have any) I think I'd resent them...I'm a horrible person, I guess,
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caco_ethes wrote: »RomaineCalm wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »Tankiscool wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I sabotage myself from ever getting 100% caught up at work and home because I can’t face the existential crisis that comes with realizing it was the process that fulfilled me and not the completion. I’m terrified to find myself asking “what now? what was it all for?”
Do you find yourself seeming to work "better" under pressure than?
Absolutely. Deadlines are my jam because it means all my regular work is being neglected and will have piled up so that it takes weeks to get through it.
This last Wednesday i set a goal to clean the entire house top to bottom. I was genuinely amused when i got to the last thing on my list because it was like I couldn’t help myself stalling. I started doing the thing finally, after about half a dozen “important” distractions, but ultimately found a way to make it way more difficult than it needed to be and didn’t finish it.
I think it’s all because I love working, i love my job, and i truly fear retirement. I’ve been stressing about it all week tbh
Edit: seriously. What do people do when work IS their happy place? I don’t really have hobbies or other things I’m really passionate about.
I wish I was this passionate about my job. I mean I like it overall but there are some days I leave crying from frustration. Maybe that’s not normal. Ha
So tell me what you live for. What gets you out of bed excited for the day? What makes the frustrating job worth dealing with?
This sounds horrible but people talk about spending time with their kids and stuff.. umm spending time with my kids is spent worrying about how badly I’m raising them. Thats my special mom-guilt time.
I love you...youre honest and frank
I honestly think if I had kids (I don't have any) I think I'd resent them...I'm a horrible person, I guess,
Not even close to horrible 🤗😙1 -
caco_ethes wrote: »RomaineCalm wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »Tankiscool wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I sabotage myself from ever getting 100% caught up at work and home because I can’t face the existential crisis that comes with realizing it was the process that fulfilled me and not the completion. I’m terrified to find myself asking “what now? what was it all for?”
Do you find yourself seeming to work "better" under pressure than?
Absolutely. Deadlines are my jam because it means all my regular work is being neglected and will have piled up so that it takes weeks to get through it.
This last Wednesday i set a goal to clean the entire house top to bottom. I was genuinely amused when i got to the last thing on my list because it was like I couldn’t help myself stalling. I started doing the thing finally, after about half a dozen “important” distractions, but ultimately found a way to make it way more difficult than it needed to be and didn’t finish it.
I think it’s all because I love working, i love my job, and i truly fear retirement. I’ve been stressing about it all week tbh
Edit: seriously. What do people do when work IS their happy place? I don’t really have hobbies or other things I’m really passionate about.
I wish I was this passionate about my job. I mean I like it overall but there are some days I leave crying from frustration. Maybe that’s not normal. Ha
So tell me what you live for. What gets you out of bed excited for the day? What makes the frustrating job worth dealing with?
This sounds horrible but people talk about spending time with their kids and stuff.. umm spending time with my kids is spent worrying about how badly I’m raising them. Thats my special mom-guilt time.
I think any decent parent thinks this from time to time. I could even go as far to say that it’s a sign of good parenting. After all, cause and effect is crucial to developing one’s character traits. The fact that you can think this deep speaks volumes of how much you care. There’s no such thing as perfect parenting. We all mess up at times and it’s important for our kids to see that. That’s how they learn it’s okay to make mistakes.1 -
RiderOfWestern wrote: »amorfati601070 wrote: »Keep_on_cardio wrote: »I believe that it is not possible to cure someone else who has mental health issues, they can only be guided and shown support
I believe depends on the level of mental illness. Theres depression and then there’s Schizophrenia, Personality Disorder’s, PTSD and others that bring on aggression. I’ve Seen so many tranquilized and appeared more human without medication. Then I’ve watched a calm over those, who desperately needed a chemical balance.
You cannot even use the word “cure” when it comes to mental health. Once you start using that word it implies that there is some norm or way we’re meant to behave or feel. You can only use objective measures such as if it is affecting someone’s work and relationships. Medication can literally save somebody’s life and its utility cannot be understated. It’s complicated but I think ultimately the change has to come within but meds and therapy can help guide someone to a better place of wellbeing.
my wife is a psychologist and this is her view on it too.
if a person does not want tto truly change their behavior, then no amount of office visits can help.
This! I believe everyone has the capability of change, it’s a matter of choice. You can’t change anyone but yourself.
I also believe that it’s easier said than done. Life is about perspective. Personally I feel a lot of depression simply breaks down to the lack of perspective and proper coping mechanisms. Not many people understand that change is accomplished through the choices one makes on how to handle a circumstantial situation, rather than allowing it to control them. Until one doesn’t understand that we are the creative force in our lives, they can never truly change.3 -
laprimaJenny wrote: »RiderOfWestern wrote: »amorfati601070 wrote: »Keep_on_cardio wrote: »I believe that it is not possible to cure someone else who has mental health issues, they can only be guided and shown support
I believe depends on the level of mental illness. Theres depression and then there’s Schizophrenia, Personality Disorder’s, PTSD and others that bring on aggression. I’ve Seen so many tranquilized and appeared more human without medication. Then I’ve watched a calm over those, who desperately needed a chemical balance.
You cannot even use the word “cure” when it comes to mental health. Once you start using that word it implies that there is some norm or way we’re meant to behave or feel. You can only use objective measures such as if it is affecting someone’s work and relationships. Medication can literally save somebody’s life and its utility cannot be understated. It’s complicated but I think ultimately the change has to come within but meds and therapy can help guide someone to a better place of wellbeing.
my wife is a psychologist and this is her view on it too.
if a person does not want tto truly change their behavior, then no amount of office visits can help.
This! I believe everyone has the capability of change, it’s a matter of choice. You can’t change anyone but yourself.
I also believe that it’s easier said than done. Life is about perspective. Personally I feel a lot of depression simply breaks down to the lack of perspective and proper coping mechanisms. Not many people understand that change is accomplished through the choices one makes on how to handle a circumstantial situation, rather than allowing it to control them. Until one doesn’t understand that we are the creative force in our lives, they can never truly change.
Hey Jenny, you sound like you could be a descendant of Marcus Aurelius when you talk like that! Very stoic philosophy you got there 😁.
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amorfati601070 wrote: »laprimaJenny wrote: »RiderOfWestern wrote: »amorfati601070 wrote: »Keep_on_cardio wrote: »I believe that it is not possible to cure someone else who has mental health issues, they can only be guided and shown support
I believe depends on the level of mental illness. Theres depression and then there’s Schizophrenia, Personality Disorder’s, PTSD and others that bring on aggression. I’ve Seen so many tranquilized and appeared more human without medication. Then I’ve watched a calm over those, who desperately needed a chemical balance.
You cannot even use the word “cure” when it comes to mental health. Once you start using that word it implies that there is some norm or way we’re meant to behave or feel. You can only use objective measures such as if it is affecting someone’s work and relationships. Medication can literally save somebody’s life and its utility cannot be understated. It’s complicated but I think ultimately the change has to come within but meds and therapy can help guide someone to a better place of wellbeing.
my wife is a psychologist and this is her view on it too.
if a person does not want tto truly change their behavior, then no amount of office visits can help.
This! I believe everyone has the capability of change, it’s a matter of choice. You can’t change anyone but yourself.
I also believe that it’s easier said than done. Life is about perspective. Personally I feel a lot of depression simply breaks down to the lack of perspective and proper coping mechanisms. Not many people understand that change is accomplished through the choices one makes on how to handle a circumstantial situation, rather than allowing it to control them. Until one doesn’t understand that we are the creative force in our lives, they can never truly change.
Hey Jenny, you sound like you could be a descendant of Marcus Aurelius when you talk like that! Very stoic philosophy you got there 😁.
He was Roman after all! 😉 Plus, more importantly he’s known as one of the five good emperors.2 -
caco_ethes wrote: »RomaineCalm wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »Tankiscool wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I sabotage myself from ever getting 100% caught up at work and home because I can’t face the existential crisis that comes with realizing it was the process that fulfilled me and not the completion. I’m terrified to find myself asking “what now? what was it all for?”
Do you find yourself seeming to work "better" under pressure than?
Absolutely. Deadlines are my jam because it means all my regular work is being neglected and will have piled up so that it takes weeks to get through it.
This last Wednesday i set a goal to clean the entire house top to bottom. I was genuinely amused when i got to the last thing on my list because it was like I couldn’t help myself stalling. I started doing the thing finally, after about half a dozen “important” distractions, but ultimately found a way to make it way more difficult than it needed to be and didn’t finish it.
I think it’s all because I love working, i love my job, and i truly fear retirement. I’ve been stressing about it all week tbh
Edit: seriously. What do people do when work IS their happy place? I don’t really have hobbies or other things I’m really passionate about.
I wish I was this passionate about my job. I mean I like it overall but there are some days I leave crying from frustration. Maybe that’s not normal. Ha
So tell me what you live for. What gets you out of bed excited for the day? What makes the frustrating job worth dealing with?
This sounds horrible but people talk about spending time with their kids and stuff.. umm spending time with my kids is spent worrying about how badly I’m raising them. Thats my special mom-guilt time.
What keeps me going is knowing I’m making a difference for someone. And I know I am. Just this week someone brought me a thank you card and a small treat. I got another small gift earlier in the month from someone else. So I know my work is being noticed.
It’s the hoops I have to jump through to make things possible sometimes and also other people not pulling their weight that makes things more frustrating for me.2 -
RomaineCalm wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »RomaineCalm wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »Tankiscool wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I sabotage myself from ever getting 100% caught up at work and home because I can’t face the existential crisis that comes with realizing it was the process that fulfilled me and not the completion. I’m terrified to find myself asking “what now? what was it all for?”
Do you find yourself seeming to work "better" under pressure than?
Absolutely. Deadlines are my jam because it means all my regular work is being neglected and will have piled up so that it takes weeks to get through it.
This last Wednesday i set a goal to clean the entire house top to bottom. I was genuinely amused when i got to the last thing on my list because it was like I couldn’t help myself stalling. I started doing the thing finally, after about half a dozen “important” distractions, but ultimately found a way to make it way more difficult than it needed to be and didn’t finish it.
I think it’s all because I love working, i love my job, and i truly fear retirement. I’ve been stressing about it all week tbh
Edit: seriously. What do people do when work IS their happy place? I don’t really have hobbies or other things I’m really passionate about.
I wish I was this passionate about my job. I mean I like it overall but there are some days I leave crying from frustration. Maybe that’s not normal. Ha
So tell me what you live for. What gets you out of bed excited for the day? What makes the frustrating job worth dealing with?
This sounds horrible but people talk about spending time with their kids and stuff.. umm spending time with my kids is spent worrying about how badly I’m raising them. Thats my special mom-guilt time.
What keeps me going is knowing I’m making a difference for someone. And I know I am. Just this week someone brought me a thank you card and a small treat. I got another small gift earlier in the month from someone else. So I know my work is being noticed.
It’s the hoops I have to jump through to make things possible sometimes and also other people not pulling their weight that makes things more frustrating for me.
But asidefrom your job, what do you live for? What makes you excited to consider the possibility of retirement?
I’m like 30 years from retirement so I’m not that worried about it but I would like to have something other than my job bring me a feeling of accomplishment.
Maybe I’m depressed. Is this depression? Or just a mid-life crisis? 😅0
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