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My date with the person above me was going great until...
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She invited me inside and her cat clawed my b@lls0
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He said it was him or my cat.0
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She chose her cat.1
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I got too drunk and left with someone else0
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Thanks !!
lol 
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Till his mom showed up1
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Untill she ordered pizza with pineapple0
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нe ĸepт ѕneaĸιng нιтѕ oғ нιѕ вlυnт.0
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She was just using me as plan B for her blind date (which went well and I wasn't needed)0
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She hid all the rum1
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She wouldn't share her blunt0
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YosemiteSlamAK wrote: »She hid all the rum
Hid or drank?liftorgohome wrote: »She wouldn't share her blunt
Was paranoid about me having a blunt and not sharing!0 -
Beat up the bar tender for not having rum1
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He wouldn't help me find a bar with rum!!0
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She got drunk on rum and threw up0
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Haha!! He went home0
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And she passed out
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All after only two drinks. He couldn't handle my drunk emotional outbursts and professions of undying love for everyone0
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She got way to clingly for a first date.0
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She hurled all over my shoes.0
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He asked me to clean the puke off his shoes0
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He left to help clean shoes and never came back0
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I heard hi ya mother f-er and that's all I remember until I woke up naked in a tub of ice1
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he blew bubbles with the straw0
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Didn't appreciate my milk bubble art0
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He was using his nose to blow the bubbles, at first0
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She said "Aren't u hot?U should take that shirt off" & Jammed a $1 down my pants .....A $1???? .....My minimum is $5!!! ...... (Oh ...Who am I kidding)*sigh*0
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He said , did you even left bro. Lol0
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*lift1
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Hired a hitman to take me out for the insurance money0
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