Ladies, be honest......why no replies?

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  • FatOldBat
    FatOldBat Posts: 3,307 Member
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    Hi, it's my first day here and I just wanted to tell you how vey impressive your weight loss is. Wow, just wow!
  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
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    I wouldn't mind being MFP friends, but I don't really like the idea of a pen pal. Writing letters and mailing them? Seriously? Why would you do that when there is the instant online version? My guess it's nothing personal, most people probably don't want a pen pal in the traditional sense. And if you meant "friend" then maybe it came across wrong because you referred to it as pen pal?
  • fireflyz2
    fireflyz2 Posts: 14 Member
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    I haven't been here long, but I am inclined to agree with most people, you probably have a better chance with friending guys, at least until people get to know you from you being in conversations, then maybe some of the girls might become friends. That said, I went back and read your first post, and it seemed like you were only asking for friends in your area, with the express purpose of hiking together someday, which might have made some people not reply because they live elsewhere or don't like hiking. Good luck!
  • Julichch
    Julichch Posts: 2
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    Hiii :) here i am trying to start a new healthy life ! feel free to add me as a friend :)
  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
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    Why are you specifically asking the ladies why there was no reply? In your other post you mention you are single. This seems like a creepy coincidence but I could be wrong. Most people are on MFP for support, not flirting.
  • cindyhoney2
    cindyhoney2 Posts: 603 Member
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    I sent you a request and some suggestions :)
    Best of luck!
  • ecw3780
    ecw3780 Posts: 608 Member
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    Hi. I can't not answer for the other ladies you may have sent a message to, but I can tell you my personal reasoning for how I would have handled the situation. As you may see, my profile picture is a cat. I changed it to a picture of a cat because I kept getting "how you doin' " messages from men. Now that my picture is a cat, the messages have stopped. Maybe I over reacted, but I am not really on this site to get hit on (I am happily married). I know a lot of people are on here for the community, and they want to rack up the friends, but I am happy with my small group of friends. So, now that I sound pretty snotty, I guess what I am trying to say is don't take it personal. You may have just messaged some people who weren't looking for new friends or who were sick of getting chatted up by strange men (not that your strange, just a stranger).
  • Sadiemae2008
    Sadiemae2008 Posts: 11
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    I think you got some great answers here, I hope it helps. I found several that I agreed wholeheartedly with. As a woman, I'm not interested in adding men to my list. It's not a dating site and as someone else stated, men and women lose weight differently. And frankly, sometimes the struggle to lose weight brings up sensitive subjects that I don't want to discuss with "men in the room". Also, and I don't mean this to sound offensive, I want to protect the other ladies I'm friends with by not introducing men that neither of us are familiar with. As another also said, please don't take it personally. It takes some time, but I think you'll eventually find the right people on here. Best of luck in your weight loss journey!!!
  • SailerSiren13
    SailerSiren13 Posts: 51 Member
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    anyone feel free to add me as long as your willing to be supportive. i stumble and fall and am human i don't want judgmental people just helpful. Cannuck i'm sending you a request now.
  • clarkeje1
    clarkeje1 Posts: 1,637 Member
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    You should add more info on your profile and make your diary public so you can get feedback :)
  • MB_Positif
    MB_Positif Posts: 8,897 Member
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    You've got to fill out your profile so people have a little idea about who you are and what you are here for! Good luck!
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    Honestly, you seem a tad insecure. Peruse the forums more and you will make more friends. You might even find yourself with more friends than you can handle. It's been known to happen.
  • RhonndaJ
    RhonndaJ Posts: 1,615 Member
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    Couldn't begin to tell you why no replies but my suggestion is no different from what others have said. Fill out more on your profile and get out on the boards and comment so people can see who you are and what you might have in common with them.
  • ChubbieCanuck
    ChubbieCanuck Posts: 45 Member
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    Thank you all for the outpouring of replies and advice!.......I feel just like George Bailey felt when his friends came through with a punch-bowl full of cash in "It's a Wonderful Life" . Hmm, maybe I should have come up with a more summery analogy

    Weell, off to join a few forums and figger out HOW to add friends (or accept their invites).
  • KenosFeoh
    KenosFeoh Posts: 1,837 Member
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    I've never seen you before in my life.
  • melb_alex
    melb_alex Posts: 1,154 Member
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    I've sent you a friend request :)
  • alisonlynn1976
    alisonlynn1976 Posts: 929 Member
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    Why do your MFP friends have to be women? And why would your looks matter?

    Usually when I get a message from a man I don't know wanting to "exchange messages" or whatever, what's he's looking for is some kind of online sexual interaction. And because I am not a free porn service, I find this off-putting. This site in particular has been relatively free from that kind of crap compared with other kinds of sites, but I've already blocked three men here who have sent me messages asking me inappropriate sexual questions. That's not why I'm here! It's especially offensive here because I think they assume that I'm some desperate, lonely fat chick who will strip on webcam immediately for any random bozo who tells me I'm pretty. Actually, I've had an active and satisfying in-person personal life all along, even at my very fattest!

    Most of my MFP friends are other women with similar weight loss/fitness goals as mine. It makes the most sense to seek support from others who are trying to do the same thing, doesn't it?
  • KiwiJewels
    KiwiJewels Posts: 36 Member
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    This was worth reading just for Skullshank's comments! LOL Clearly I need to friend him if I ever need a good laugh :-) Good to see you have 28 friends now Canuck - I suspect that's more then me dammit! *grin* Still, I've only been on here a week or two, I live forever away from most of you, and I have a dog on my profile photo so I'm going to blame that :-) See you all out there!
  • crunchybubblez
    crunchybubblez Posts: 387 Member
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    I post about a lot of "female" problems...
    Nothing against guys, I just prefer to only have female friends that can
    relate to things that I go through.
    Especially because I'm extra determined to get the weight off because my husband and
    I want to try for another baby. :)
    I have a TMI profile.
  • heather3324
    heather3324 Posts: 4
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    I have one friend on here and that's it. Please feel free to add me as a friend. I look forward to supporting your weight loss. I need motivation too. Thanks, hope to hear from you soon.

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