All of my friends are getting bigger............

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Replies

  • MommaGem2017
    MommaGem2017 Posts: 405 Member
    piperdown44 wrote: »
    @jospen83 your shirt had me laughing out loud IRL! Co-workers wondered what was so funny :D

    And I just choked on my coffee reading it :D
  • JaydedMiss
    JaydedMiss Posts: 4,286 Member
    edited August 2017
    No idea if this is even still the conversation i got tired of reading the fights lol. But my thoughts...

    I have noticed that on a third/fourth date im much more willing to eat tons (And im plenty happy on a first date to mow down, But for sake of the conversation i am more comfortable doing it)

    So I imagine finding someone who loves you could easily lead to more dates out and comfort eating watching tv together and stuff like my exs family bringing me cake and chocolate on my birthday. So more people= more food and more comfort knowing someone loves you could lead to gain. For sure.

    Partly why im not kind of a picky *kitten* when dating. I dont want to be this girl but when i meet people i make it clear im active and i want someone also working on being active and fit. I feel judgemental but to me its important not to backtrack, And its VERY easy to do if you get comfortable with someone who tends to overeat or not care. I work hard, Id just like someone who has the same priorities.

    Iv found men who are totally down for meeting and having coffee/long walks, Who then turn around and ruin it thinking its funny to try and tempt me relentlessly to "cheat" and go get drinks and a big greasy dinner and dessert. Which im down for but if thats your idea for a first date and clearly find tempting me when i say no thanks funny i see you as someone who will be bad for me long term and tend to move on. Sorry not really sorry.

    Not even sure im making any sense to the conversation, My point is yes its easy to backtrack and slip into being totally comfortable putting weight on. Especially with a partner by your side loving you no matter what, And complimenting you often. I actively seek people who i wont do that with. Not everyone does, And if you fall in love your in love. Its great and no judgement. Life happens. Id just like to avoid the temptation, Sort of like an ex smoker dating a smoker. Or walking your butt into a delicious smelling bakery daily just to look. You know its bad news for you, But cant always avoid the temptation forever. Best to try and minimize it before it starts sometimes lol
  • laurabadams
    laurabadams Posts: 201 Member
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    piperdown44 wrote: »
    @jospen83 your shirt had me laughing out loud IRL! Co-workers wondered what was so funny :D

    #teampluto

    Yeeesss
  • sollyn23l2
    sollyn23l2 Posts: 1,792 Member
    KelseyRL wrote: »
    HeliumIsNoble wrote: »
    I once read that statistically, women are very likely to put on weight after the start of a long-term relationship. Wherever it was claimed it was because it comes naturally to someone dishing up food to give both adults exactly the same size of portion.

    No idea if this is true, but it's interesting.

    This might be slightly off topic, but is it always the case that men and women can't have the same serving size? My husband and are with an inch of each other for height (5' 9"/5' 10") and although he's is slightly broader than I in the shoulders, it's not much. I can wear his shirts around the house and the shoulder of them is only slightly below my natural shoulder. So I guess I'm asking if a man and woman happened to be the same height/build, would the woman still need less just because of being a woman? Or is just that men are usually larger than women?

    Because men have higher muscle mass, yes, men will always be able to eat more, unless you happen to be considerably larger than the man. Given a woman and man of the same size, the man is biologically designed to have more muscle per pound, while the woman will have more fat, so the man can eat more.
  • ekim2016
    ekim2016 Posts: 1,198 Member
    It's natural to want to help them out and to see the light...but none of my business really. It hurts to see them destroy their health with bad choices but I was there once. But as another mentioned, I don't know their possible medical situations so I should not judge. I'm a work in progress!
  • yung_baller_86
    yung_baller_86 Posts: 25 Member
    rainbowbow wrote: »
    HeliumIsNoble wrote: »
    I once read that statistically, women are very likely to put on weight after the start of a long-term relationship. Wherever it was claimed it was because it comes naturally to someone dishing up food to give both adults exactly the same size of portion.

    No idea if this is true, but it's interesting.

    This has happened to me twice, but was easily stopped when i realized portion sizes for men and women simply can't be the same (even if i want them to). :pensive:

    me too! :( first two boyfriends i put on quite a bit of weight over the years. did it again the 3rd time just last year... and right now im working it off! the difference this time is im losing the weight the right way, and my boyfriend is super supportive with cooking healthy stuff and not suggesting junk food like the first 2.

    relationship weight, ugh, been there done that!
  • jaedwa1
    jaedwa1 Posts: 114 Member
    [/quote] Sometimes I intend to do some yoga after an hour of TV but get sucked into that cuddling vortex.[/quote]

    I've lost many workout hours because of the damnable cuddle vortex!!!
  • lorbor93
    lorbor93 Posts: 39 Member
    When you're in high school, your parents are usually still cooking for you (most parents don't feed their kids top ramen every night). Your metabolism is naturally higher. You aren't working 40+ hours a week at a desk. You're probably more active.

    Also, like a few others mentioned, you don't feel as compelled to stay trim in a long term relationship because you get comfortable (this is how I gained 40 pounds a few years back). No statistics here, just my personal thoughts.

  • MamaMc3
    MamaMc3 Posts: 213 Member
    Life happens. People get married, start working stressful jobs, have kids . . . a lot of people tend to gain weight as they get older. It's not that they "don't care" . . . . they just have other priorities that are taking their focus. I personally worked full-time and then some while I was going to school full-time on evenings and weekends.
    There's nothing wrong with telling your friends what you are doing if they ask, but the tone of your post comes across as a little judgmental. Everyone is different, everyone has different priorities. Try not to call your friends "huge" and you'll have more friends. :)
  • Packerjohn
    Packerjohn Posts: 4,855 Member
    edited August 2017
    MamaMc3 wrote: »
    Life happens. People get married, start working stressful jobs, have kids . . . a lot of people tend to gain weight as they get older. It's not that they "don't care" . . . . they just have other priorities that are taking their focus. I personally worked full-time and then some while I was going to school full-time on evenings and weekends.
    There's nothing wrong with telling your friends what you are doing if they ask, but the tone of your post comes across as a little judgmental. Everyone is different, everyone has different priorities. Try not to call your friends "huge" and you'll have more friends. :)

    Keeping healthy, which includes maintaining a reasonable weight, needs to be a priority or you get sick, lose mobility, etc and you can't do the other things.

    Diet is 80% + of weight control. It doesn't take any more time to eat x% less of whatever is in front of you so you can meet reasonable calorie goals. Personally don't buy the "priorities" excuse.
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,474 Member
    I so agree. everyone is getting fat> huh?
  • Bry_Fitness70
    Bry_Fitness70 Posts: 2,480 Member
    OregonMother wrote: »
    snickerscharlie wrote: »
    Bry_Lander wrote: »
    I don't see how it is acceptable to "let yourself go" because you feel comfortable with someone and are no longer motivated to impress that person with your physical appearance (taking into account aging, babies, and medical conditions, of course). The shape that you were in when you committed to being in a relationship should be the baseline going forward.

    Or what? Grounds for divorce?

    Yep. My husband is losing his hair -- there's considerably less of it than the day I married him. Using that baseline . . . :smirk: /sarcasm

    It's a ridiculous proposition. People change. We're supposed to. It's called life, experience, and aging.

    Too bad I didn't include aging as a foreseeable event that changes us...oh yeah, I actually did, it is right there in the thread, lol.
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