Less alcohol- February 2018- one day at a time
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@SanDiegofitmom Thank you for posting that! I've known about doing those things but never understood how they affect me physically/emotionally thru the neurotransmitters. That was very enlightening.3
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Had a drink after a day out shopping with a friend. We each had only one but I have to say that martini left me feeling not so great. I keep thinking about the contrast.4
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Happy Friday! 4 days AF for me, and feeling better (despite little sleep this week) than I have in months! Tonight will be a challenge, Friday Bowling with our buddies that love to drink. In fact they feel that it improves their game! Our usual is a TQ drink to start, beer in-between, and more TQ... sometimes if there was a celebration, other shots shared. *** I will be AF tonight *** I will sip on my club soda with lemon and enjoy our friends and bowling, and will not have trouble sleeping tonight, or wake up with a headache. This will be a nice night to top off a stressful week. Then work tomorrow (2nd job). I love this thread... it is helping to keep me honest with myself and my struggles.
I hope you all have a Great Friday!9 -
JulieAL1969 wrote: »dressagerider1020 wrote: »Arrggh. Really struggling today. My plan was to drink only Fri-Sun. Made it through V Day with a delightful beach picnic and some fake chardonnay from Trader Joe's (pretty hideous). But today just had a stressful, 12-hour+ day at work and absolutely chugged a glass of chardonnay just now. It's not that I drank that much but I had a plan and blew it. I'm trying not to be too mad at myself, but think it's time for a cup of Sleepytime tea and some chilling out in front of the tube, LOL. This was the first time I've done stress drinking since maybe mid-December. I don't want to fall back into old habits. Really pretty disappointed in myself. Great to have this group to moan and groan to!
I know the first thing we want to do is get mad at ourselves when we make a mistake, but you traded in the wine glass for a teacup, so that's a win!
I'm afraid I feel a craving coming on for the weekend, and I'm fighting it. I'm trying to stay busy and come here to talk, and read everyone's experience and how we're all dealing with things. I'm going to bed early tonight.
Yes, plan ahead. Read the thread. Watch some videos or read some blogs. And find other ways to nourish yourself. Stay strong! Xo
thanks, I am trying to plan out my day with a lot of house-type organizing, of course reading here, and maybe taking the dog for a walk...but it's warm and muggy out, ewwww!
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I had a nice win tonight. I had a company event after work (for those new here I work for a beer wholesaler, so drinking events are many and sometimes tough to attend)
There was free Guinness, one of my favorites, and hard seltzer. And free pizza. God I wanted pizza ...
I had nothing. No drinks. No pizza. Came home to a home cooked meal by my wife
Nice win, indeed! That's a lot to pass up, but you did it and feel better this morning, I bet.3 -
looneycatblue wrote: »Happy Friday! 4 days AF for me, and feeling better (despite little sleep this week) than I have in months! Tonight will be a challenge, Friday Bowling with our buddies that love to drink. In fact they feel that it improves their game! Our usual is a TQ drink to start, beer in-between, and more TQ... sometimes if there was a celebration, other shots shared. *** I will be AF tonight *** I will sip on my club soda with lemon and enjoy our friends and bowling, and will not have trouble sleeping tonight, or wake up with a headache. This will be a nice night to top off a stressful week. Then work tomorrow (2nd job). I love this thread... it is helping to keep me honest with myself and my struggles.
I hope you all have a Great Friday!
I think it helps so much to have a plan, and you do! And looking ahead to the next morning is always helpful - waking up clear and ready to go beats headache, sick stomach, sluggish, cranky, sad, regretful, bloated, off food plan...did I miss anything? Way to go! 4 -
I love this thread-read it everyday for inspiration. I have succeeded in not drinking at all during the week but have allowed myself to have a few every weekend since the beginning of January. I am going to try to be AF this weekend and see how that goes. I think the weekend indulgence of food and alcohol is preventing me from losing much weight so far this month. I know it will require a lot of self talk to keep myself on track! Love islandbeez quote: Onward and downward!6
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islandbeez wrote: »Blah! I caved last night. I don't know why though...apparently too much alone time, I need supervision!
It wasn't enough to make me hungover, but I still feel like shite just because. Guess I will evaluate that and try to make it a lesson of some sort. I will not drink today. Also, I have lost 8 1/2 pounds since January 21st! How motivating, the only change I made was eliminating alcohol. Onward and downward! Stay strong my dears!
Wow! Great weight loss! Lots of calories saved. And your little organs got a much needed rest. You were funny when you said you need supervision. I remember telling my friends I need to hire a "minder" like the celebrities have. Keep me on track. Ha.
Today is a new day! Hugs!
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Hey I have lost 8.2 lbs since giving up alcohol. Actually January I cut down and then went dry from January 23rd. It is not easy to do, but it is easier than it was. I did change other things as well. Cut my calories and became more consistent. I am not drinking and then overeating on those same days. Before cutting alcohol, I was slowing gaining weight. 16 lb gain last year. I worked too hard to get the 32 lbs or so that I have off now to throw that work away. I am replacing drinking with other more positive habits. It is worth it and so am I.11
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salleewins wrote: »Hey I have lost 8.2 lbs since giving up alcohol. Actually January I cut down and then went dry from January 23rd. It is not easy to do, but it is easier than it was. I did change other things as well. Cut my calories and became more consistent. I am not drinking and then overeating on those same days. Before cutting alcohol, I was slowing gaining weight. 16 lb gain last year. I worked too hard to get the 32 lbs or so that I have off now to throw that work away. I am replacing drinking with other more positive habits. It is worth it and so am I.
Wow that is fabulous!!! Isn't that so motivating!!2 -
JulieAL1969 wrote: »islandbeez wrote: »Blah! I caved last night. I don't know why though...apparently too much alone time, I need supervision! It wasn't enough to make me hungover, but I still feel like shite just because. Guess I will evaluate that and try to make it a lesson of some sort. I will not drink today. Also, I have lost 8 1/2 pounds since January 21st! How motivating, the only change I made was eliminating alcohol. Onward and downward! Stay strong my dears!
Wow! Great weight loss! Lots of calories saved. And your little organs got a much needed rest. You were funny when you said you need supervision. I remember telling my friends I need to hire a "minder" like the celebrities have. Keep me on track. Ha.
Today is a new day! Hugs!
That is awesome!!! So inspiring!!2 -
islandbeez wrote: »Blah! I caved last night. I don't know why though...apparently too much alone time, I need supervision! It wasn't enough to make me hungover, but I still feel like shite just because. Guess I will evaluate that and try to make it a lesson of some sort. I will not drink today. Also, I have lost 8 1/2 pounds since January 21st! How motivating, the only change I made was eliminating alcohol. Onward and downward! Stay strong my dears!
It's ok, you still rock, get back on the dry side4 -
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For the month of February, I am only 2 days AF but 10 of the 14 days, I have cut back. I'm reaching for at least 10 AF days this month. Only 8 more to go.6
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lporter229 wrote: »Valentine's dinner with my husband last night was a success. Our tradition is to cook a nice meal together, which usually involves drinks while cooking, wine with dinner, then at leas tone night cap, and usually ends with me not remembering going to bed. Last night we both brought home a bottle of wine. When we opened the first one I declared that when that was gone, we would not open the second one. It was not a problem because we did not even finish the first one We had a wonderful dinner together and I remember exactly how it ended. I especially love that, without really even discussing the matter, my husband has taken my cue and is cutting back on drinking too.
That is so great! Congrats on your success @lporter229 !
Am I the only one here whose spouse drinks less than they do? Like significantly less? I've never seen him drunk. He says he's never been drunk. Crazy, I know.
But he's never judged my drinking. Even when sometimes I think he should have lol.
On Valentines, he got my fav bottle of wine. I had 2 glasses and stopped, which was not hard at all. I'm realizing I am perfectly fine with 2 glasses. At least at home I am...
Only problem is the bottle he bought is the big sized bottle. So now I "have wine at home" you know? I drank two glasses last night, and I'm sure I'll have 2 tonight.
It's hard to say no when it's in the house. 7 -
AlainaKayy wrote: »For the month of February, I am only 2 days AF but 10 of the 14 days, I have cut back. I'm reaching for at least 10 AF days this month. Only 8 more to go.
Very very good!!!4 -
[/quote] Never!!! I'm so glad to see you too. You're my favorite dressage rider[/quote]
@norminv Then I must be your favorite Eventer, lol!! I do Dressage in order to do Cross Country
Today will be day 4 in a row AF. 6 out of 15 for February. I'm really trying to get to the 14 days AF that Julie talked about and hoping that will change my attitude/habit.
Keep reading a chapter or two at night of Quitting the Easyway book. Not far enough along yet to comment.
Happy Friday to all.....keep up the smart choices!
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@springsweet - My husband drinks as much or more than I do, but I rarely, if ever, see him drunk. Of course, he weighs twice as much as me, so if I am drinking along with him...
As far as wanting to drink wine if you have it, I get that. For those of us who have decided to drink moderately, we have to decide how much that is. For me, I don't have a problem with drinking two glasses of wine. It's not enough to make me drunk or hung over and I can usually be done, IF I have decided in advance that is my limit for the day. On the other hand, I don't want to drink 2 glasses of wine every day either. I have found that I am enjoying those AF days, probably more than the ones when I drink, which is a good feeling. Because of this, I am finally starting to get to a place where I can imagine eliminating alcohol entirely.
Maybe you could try and plan in advance that, even though you have wine in the house, you are going to have an alcohol free day. Plan to drink tea or a mocktail or something that you can look forward to the way you would look forward to your glass of wine. That is what has worked for me.5 -
Ha! Maybe the only dressage rider!
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Hi All! I was thinking back to last week when I met my teacher friends. We went to at a local , upscale bar after work. My friends ordered two wines each, and I ordered club soda. We ordered four appetizers to share. Then, Another guy sat down next to me at the bar. He ordered a club soda and an appetizer.
Then, all of a sudden, the normally cordial, professional bartender turned around and muttered frustratingly under his breath, "God, another club soda taking up a space."
The other soda drinker just looked at me stunned. I was stunned, too. Over the years, I've spent thousands of dollars at this upscale bar. Bartender even knows my name. So, the other club soda guy turned to me and said did he just say that? I said, "yep".
The man said, "I was just in here last week drinking wine with my friends, but today, I just wanted to eat and not drink."
Without passing judgment on bartender, (maybe he was having a bad day or maybe we were taking up space of an alcohol paying customer) I was really stunned. We both ordered food. We were former alcohol drinking customers.
Anyway, I think it was a good life lesson. Dont take anything personally. Of course, the embarrassment didn't last long. And the other guy and I had a meaningful conversation about life and life's lessons. And I left happy and sober. But it is a little life lesson on how people will look at you differently when you don't drink. I'm not bothered by it, but it was a little jarring.
P.s. The other club soda drinker told me he left a huge tip to the bartender to make up for the space he took not drinking. One last thing, When I was in Nashville ordering my club soda all weekend, I did leave more tip than the club soda to compensate the bartenders.4 -
springsweet wrote: »lporter229 wrote: »Valentine's dinner with my husband last night was a success. Our tradition is to cook a nice meal together, which usually involves drinks while cooking, wine with dinner, then at leas tone night cap, and usually ends with me not remembering going to bed. Last night we both brought home a bottle of wine. When we opened the first one I declared that when that was gone, we would not open the second one. It was not a problem because we did not even finish the first one We had a wonderful dinner together and I remember exactly how it ended. I especially love that, without really even discussing the matter, my husband has taken my cue and is cutting back on drinking too.
That is so great! Congrats on your success @lporter229 !
Am I the only one here whose spouse drinks less than they do? Like significantly less? I've never seen him drunk. He says he's never been drunk. Crazy, I know.
But he's never judged my drinking. Even when sometimes I think he should have lol.
On Valentines, he got my fav bottle of wine. I had 2 glasses and stopped, which was not hard at all. I'm realizing I am perfectly fine with 2 glasses. At least at home I am...
Only problem is the bottle he bought is the big sized bottle. So now I "have wine at home" you know? I drank two glasses last night, and I'm sure I'll have 2 tonight. It's hard to say no when it's in the house.
My spouse drinks more but never gets drunk. I drink a few drinks and I am the one sleeping on the bathroom floor. So, I guess my body metabolism isn't like his. Anyway, recently I noticed he didn't drink for four days. I commented on it two days ago, and I asked
"Have you stopped drinking?. He said for now, he stopped. I said, "It kind of sucks, doesn't it. It's hard." He proudly said, "Not really. It's easy. I'm not addicted to it; i just love the taste."
Last night, I saw him pour a double scotch and tip toe out of the room. Made me chuckle! I didn't say a word and sipped my tea. We are all on our own journeys really, even if we are married to spouses who drink.5 -
JulieAL1969 wrote: »Hi All! I was thinking back to last week when I met my teacher friends. We went to at a local , upscale bar after work. My friends ordered two wines each, and I ordered club soda. We ordered four appetizers to share. Then, Another guy sat down next to me at the bar. He ordered a club soda and an appetizer.
Then, all of a sudden, the normally cordial, professional bartender turned around and muttered frustratingly under his breath, "God, another club soda taking up a space."
The other soda drinker just looked at me stunned. I was stunned, too. Over the years, I've spent thousands of dollars at this upscale bar. Bartender even knows my name. So, the other club soda guy turned to me and said did he just say that? I said, "yep".
The man said, "I was just in here last week drinking wine with my friends, but today, I just wanted to eat and not drink."
Without passing judgment on bartender, (maybe he was having a bad day or maybe we were taking up space of an alcohol paying customer) I was really stunned. We both ordered food. We were former alcohol drinking customers.
Anyway, I think it was a good life lesson. Dont take anything personally. Of course, the embarrassment didn't last long. And the other guy and I had a meaningful conversation about life and life's lessons. And I left happy and sober. But it is a little life lesson on how people will look at you differently when you don't drink. I'm not bothered by it, but it was a little jarring.
P.s. The other club soda drinker told me he left a huge tip to the bartender to make up for the space he took not drinking. One last thing, When I was in Nashville ordering my club soda all weekend, I did leave more tip than the club soda to compensate the bartenders.
All I can say is WOW!!! I can't believe he said that. Well I am glad you weren't offended. But I am sure it felt great being sober.3 -
Never!!! I'm so glad to see you too. You're my favorite dressage rider[/quote]
@norminv Then I must be your favorite Eventer, lol!! I do Dressage in order to do Cross Country
Today will be day 4 in a row AF. 6 out of 15 for February. I'm really trying to get to the 14 days AF that Julie talked about and hoping that will change my attitude/habit.
Keep reading a chapter or two at night of Quitting the Easyway book. Not far enough along yet to comment.
Happy Friday to all.....keep up the smart choices!
[/quote]
I get it, xcjumper - cross country...I thought I saw a horse behind you in your avatar?
Wow, 2 dressage riders in one room (that's not a tack room!) - pretty good 2 -
dressagerider1020 wrote: »
@norminv Then I must be your favorite Eventer, lol!! I do Dressage in order to do Cross Country
Today will be day 4 in a row AF. 6 out of 15 for February. I'm really trying to get to the 14 days AF that Julie talked about and hoping that will change my attitude/habit.
Keep reading a chapter or two at night of Quitting the Easyway book. Not far enough along yet to comment.
Happy Friday to all.....keep up the smart choices!
[/quote]
I get it, xcjumper - cross country...I thought I saw a horse behind you in your avatar?
Wow, 2 dressage riders in one room (that's not a tack room!) - pretty good [/quote]
I sent friend requests to both but neither accepted. Time to drink 1 -
springsweet wrote: »
Am I the only one here whose spouse drinks less than they
Until I did Dry Jan my husband was much much better at doing AF nights throughout the week. Now I think I’m beating him but overall I was the more frequent drinker and he drinks beer which has a lower percentage so my two-three glasses of wine were always more than his beer.
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@JulieAL1969 , re: the bartender - you and the other club soda handled it well, it was pretty rude of him. But as you said, he might have been having a bad day.2
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JulieAL1969 wrote: »Hi All! I was thinking back to last week when I met my teacher friends. We went to at a local , upscale bar after work. My friends ordered two wines each, and I ordered club soda. We ordered four appetizers to share. Then, Another guy sat down next to me at the bar. He ordered a club soda and an appetizer.
Then, all of a sudden, the normally cordial, professional bartender turned around and muttered frustratingly under his breath, "God, another club soda taking up a space."
The other soda drinker just looked at me stunned. I was stunned, too. Over the years, I've spent thousands of dollars at this upscale bar. Bartender even knows my name. So, the other club soda guy turned to me and said did he just say that? I said, "yep".
The man said, "I was just in here last week drinking wine with my friends, but today, I just wanted to eat and not drink."
Without passing judgment on bartender, (maybe he was having a bad day or maybe we were taking up space of an alcohol paying customer) I was really stunned. We both ordered food. We were former alcohol drinking customers.
Anyway, I think it was a good life lesson. Dont take anything personally. Of course, the embarrassment didn't last long. And the other guy and I had a meaningful conversation about life and life's lessons. And I left happy and sober. But it is a little life lesson on how people will look at you differently when you don't drink. I'm not bothered by it, but it was a little jarring.
P.s. The other club soda drinker told me he left a huge tip to the bartender to make up for the space he took not drinking. One last thing, When I was in Nashville ordering my club soda all weekend, I did leave more tip than the club soda to compensate the bartenders.
This pisses me off as much as an article recently posted on FB about "things not to say to your bartender". Those things, in a quick summary, were not to ask for any fancy drinks or anything that makes him/her do the work in which he/she specializes. So, presumably, after a week of being herded around like cattle in traffic, public transit, etc. and being treated like a peon at work (for those of us who don't have wonderful jobs). when one goes out to a bar, we are herded and categorized based on our potential to spend on less than poor quality service. They should just have a sign "Only those ordering alcohol will be served -- designated drivers may wait in the lobby" and "See list of 5 easiest to mix drinks before ordering". If it was an upscale bar with barely standing room, well, maybe anyone working there might get a little tense if they were less than professional.
I never, ever complain to or about anyone in the service industry (though many deserve it for their poor attitude) as I would not want anyone to get in trouble because of me. I know these people make their bucks because of the antiquated tipping system which allows employers to shuck the responsibility of paying their people adequately, but they are service employees. Yes, certainly anyone can have a bad day, but that doesn't mean it's okay to treat customers like cash cows (even if that's all they/we are). That being said, there are many servers, bartenders, cashiers who would benefit from some re-training in basic customer service etiquette.3 -
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JulieAL1969 wrote: »Hi All! I was thinking back to last week when I met my teacher friends. We went to at a local , upscale bar after work. My friends ordered two wines each, and I ordered club soda. We ordered four appetizers to share. Then, Another guy sat down next to me at the bar. He ordered a club soda and an appetizer.
Then, all of a sudden, the normally cordial, professional bartender turned around and muttered frustratingly under his breath, "God, another club soda taking up a space."
The other soda drinker just looked at me stunned. I was stunned, too. Over the years, I've spent thousands of dollars at this upscale bar. Bartender even knows my name. So, the other club soda guy turned to me and said did he just say that? I said, "yep".
The man said, "I was just in here last week drinking wine with my friends, but today, I just wanted to eat and not drink."
Without passing judgment on bartender, (maybe he was having a bad day or maybe we were taking up space of an alcohol paying customer) I was really stunned. We both ordered food. We were former alcohol drinking customers.
Anyway, I think it was a good life lesson. Dont take anything personally. Of course, the embarrassment didn't last long. And the other guy and I had a meaningful conversation about life and life's lessons. And I left happy and sober. But it is a little life lesson on how people will look at you differently when you don't drink. I'm not bothered by it, but it was a little jarring.
P.s. The other club soda drinker told me he left a huge tip to the bartender to make up for the space he took not drinking. One last thing, When I was in Nashville ordering my club soda all weekend, I did leave more tip than the club soda to compensate the bartenders.
Wow. Just wow. You handled that way better than i would have, haha. It’s not like you were there not spending any money at all since you were eating. And even if you weren’t you shouldn’t have to feel like you aren’t welcome there for not drinking. It isnt like you and the other guy were preventing other people from coming into the establishment.
I had a similar thing the other week when I had water and a salad at the bar. The bartender kept asking if i wanted a beer menu or if she could get me anything besides water. Nah, i’m good.4
...hence the 
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