Less Alcohol- July 2018- One Day at a Time
Replies
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Good morning all I have been on vacation for the last wo weeks and reading the posts but not really responding or posting because with just my phone it takes me forever. I want to relate a few things
for those here fairly recently I am AF it was 10 years May 22 and have lost over 175 pounds and for me vacations are opportunity to run and swim more as well as relax in a different setting.
I swam every morning for between 70 and 90 minutes and it seems people near the pool always have questions one being How OLD are you anyway? I am 70 and the thought that an OLD man is doing this strikes them as strange. However one conversation that was interesting and caused me to reflect was with the daughter of an 80 year old who told me that her father also was heavier, drank and ate much differently when he was younger and then changed and lost the weight and didn't drink and improved his fitness and when he became ill with cancer his fitness and otherwise health might have saved his life fighting the disease. His doctors credited his recovery on his physical condition.
This brought to mind a friend of ours that rode his bike well into his 80s and became ill and when he saw us after he recovered and was riding again he said his bike saved his life.
What we are doing are investing in our future as good health will possibly come to our aid if we become ill.
When I am running and its really hot or I am tiring I say to myself " Like your life depends on it" to help me keep going.
All of the posts that talk about hang overs and mental fog and a general feeling of "UGGGGHHHH after we drink does suggest that alcohol is a detriment to good health in larger quantities
For those who don't know with me, my idea of moderation was once every 3 to4 years if an occasion arose.
I have dropped my resting pulse from 80 to 45 my BP was 220/110 when drinking now it runs 116/ 68
I drank over a pint of gin every day to me that was only about 4 drinks but I had a big glass.
So if you ask yourself why am I trying to be AF is it worth the effort, after all its so much easier to give up and just drink think about " Like your life depends on it" to help keep you going16 -
JulieAL1969 wrote: »Westschmeis wrote: »Interesting side effect for me is lower resting pulse rate, and lower average pulse rate. Really did not expect that, plus a new low on the scale this morning, and this is only a little over a week AF!
HooRaw!!
Great points! Our friend @NormInv posted his significant resting pulse rate change dramatically lowered over the time he has been AF. So, you are so right about noticing that. So happy for your 8 days of AF! Awesome!
I was on medication for tachycardia because my resting pulse rate was in the 120 area. Guess what? It's in the mid 80s now. SMDH4 -
andysport1 wrote: »
I don’t want to know the answer, I just want you to know why you drink.
The reason alcohol makes people feel relaxed is because it blocks your brain from working correctly.
I like this. Self awareness is a very important tool. Thank you @andysport11 -
So if you ask yourself why am I trying to be AF is it worth the effort, after all its so much easier to give up and just drink think about " Like your life depends on it" to help keep you going
Interesting that you should make this comment about peoples' perception that "drinking" is easier than quitting. I recently watched an Annie Grace segment about moderating & she made some very interesting points about our decision making capabilities & that our brain uses the same energy whether we are making large or small decisions & how trying to moderate means we are constantly making smaller decisions around drinking: when to drink, how much etc that our brain becomes tired & that can set us up to not make the best decisions around drinking, whereas deciding not to drink, although a HUGE decision, is only one decision and is freeing...once we get past the withdrawal process of course.
It really is a mindset. At the same time, I know personally that it took me a lot of attempts at moderating before I came to the conclusion that I cannot moderate!! And that is because I had developed a "problem" with alcohol and from everything I've learned once you have a problem with alcohol you cannot NOT have a problem with alcohol.
Anyway, she said it way better than I am, but I suppose the point I got from her is that trying to moderate alcohol consumption is a lot of work. For me, it just kept me preoccupied with alcohol...ALWAYS thinking about the drinking. I CAN drink anytime I want...I just do not WANT to!!! It is liberating.
As a reminder, this is MY personal journey & I am not attempting to impose my way as anyone else's way. It is just that when I watch Craig Beck & Annie Grace they make SO much sense to me. But I am hearing what I need to hear.
My hope for everyone on this thread is that whatever their goal is with regard to alcohol that they find peace within. But for those who are working toward remaining AF I find these videos very helpful.7 -
Good morning all I have been on vacation for the last wo weeks and reading the posts but not really responding or posting because with just my phone it takes me forever. I want to relate a few things
for those here fairly recently I am AF it was 10 years May 22 and have lost over 175 pounds and for me vacations are opportunity to run and swim more as well as relax in a different setting.
I swam every morning for between 70 and 90 minutes and it seems people near the pool always have questions one being How OLD are you anyway? I am 70 and the thought that an OLD man is doing this strikes them as strange. However one conversation that was interesting and caused me to reflect was with the daughter of an 80 year old who told me that her father also was heavier, drank and ate much differently when he was younger and then changed and lost the weight and didn't drink and improved his fitness and when he became ill with cancer his fitness and otherwise health might have saved his life fighting the disease. His doctors credited his recovery on his physical condition.
This brought to mind a friend of ours that rode his bike well into his 80s and became ill and when he saw us after he recovered and was riding again he said his bike saved his life.
What we are doing are investing in our future as good health will possibly come to our aid if we become ill.
When I am running and its really hot or I am tiring I say to myself " Like your life depends on it" to help me keep going.
All of the posts that talk about hang overs and mental fog and a general feeling of "UGGGGHHHH after we drink does suggest that alcohol is a detriment to good health in larger quantities
For those who don't know with me, my idea of moderation was once every 3 to4 years if an occasion arose.
I have dropped my resting pulse from 80 to 45 my BP was 220/110 when drinking now it runs 116/ 68
I drank over a pint of gin every day to me that was only about 4 drinks but I had a big glass.
So if you ask yourself why am I trying to be AF is it worth the effort, after all its so much easier to give up and just drink think about " Like your life depends on it" to help keep you going
Thank you for taking the time to tell us this inspiring message!!! Time is passing quickly and I needed to hear this as well as all us. I congratulate you on this success!!! I hear the gym calling me once again this am. I drank at least that much a day and only quit a day when I was so sick that I had to recover enough to be able to drink again. I have seen my blood pressure in the 220s over 100s a few times. I have seen my pulse on the treadmill jump up and down like a true roller coaster REGULARLY day in and day out. I don't want the end years--whenever they are---could be right now, lol, to not be garbage years and I know that I caused them to be garbage. Thank you!!!6 -
Thanks for everyone for sharing! I woke up and went to this I thread and am so inspired. I love how we all take nuggets from each comment and let it sink in. I love hearing from @Ke22yB because like @orphia says we are not drinking for the Tomorrow You/Me. I also know that I am emotionally still hanging on to the idea that I am close to committing to quit but just not there yet. I really dont know why I have that mind block.
@NovusDies My birthday is at a good time - summertime! Everyone likes a summer celebration:) I laughed when you said I'd have to knit a big cap for your head. Funny!
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andysport1 wrote: »So this is the big day
The magical day
Why ?
Is it a 10 day myth?
I'm not sure why day 10 BUT I believe it takes 10 days for the alcohol to leave your system. So,maybe today you will have zero residue. I love your writing style.3 -
Went for a long bike ride and the temptation to get a cold one after was so strong....that used to be the norm for me...getting a beer or 6 (always 6) after a long day outside....just said to myself, make your way home and it will be ok....so got home without beer11
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Went for a long bike ride and the temptation to get a cold one after was so strong....that used to be the norm for me...getting a beer or 6 (always 6) after a long day outside....just said to myself, make your way home and it will be ok....so got home without beer
Great going! I do the same. Once I am home I am ok.3 -
Sorry I couldn’t remember how to delete0
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JulieAL1969 wrote: »andysport1 wrote: »So this is the big day
The magical day
Why ?
Is it a 10 day myth?
I'm not sure why day 10 BUT I believe it takes 10 days for the alcohol to leave your system. So,maybe today you will have zero residue. I love your writing style.
Thanks, I like to read your posts and the way you support others.
Hey, if you want to see an awesome person, just go look in the mirror.3 -
andysport1 wrote: »imfitasacello wrote: »I’m so inspired and encouraged by all of your words. I’ve been at this since Monday, so I’m just figuring things out (technology wise) so I haven’t been commenting as much as I’d like on individual posts. Takes me so long! I’m so grateful to have this fairly anonymous source of support. I’ve limited myself to one drink a day four four days, which is huge. It seems that if I pass the one drink threshold, all bets are off and I’ll keep going. Evening boredom and social situations are challenges for me. My weight is down and I’m feeling good about my progress so far. Thank you all for your support.
Well done you,
Ask yourself why one drink?
Today take just a small sip and then sit back.
Now, have a think “do you really like the taste?”
I don’t want to know the answer, I just want you to know why you drink.
The reason alcohol makes people feel relaxed is because it blocks your brain from working correctly.
This might come across as pushing instead of just supporting. Her goal was one drink per day and she seems happy with it. This thread can be kind of tricky because less for some means moderation which can have countless definitions and for others means none or working towards none.
I certainly didn’t mean to come across as pushy
At no point did I say don’t drink, in fact I actually encouraged her to take a drink, when I learnt why I drank I found the solution that was correct for me.
I don’t push my solution on others
I think it’s useful that people understand why they do things.
Oh well,
I apologise @imfitasacello I didn’t mean to come across as pushy, just supportive.
@NovusDies, I’ll keep my thoughts to myself in future Thanks4 -
andysport1 wrote: »I certainly didn’t mean to come across as pushy
At no point did I say don’t drink, in fact I actually encouraged her to take a drink, when I learnt why I drank I found the solution that was correct for me.
I don’t push my solution on others
I think it’s useful that people understand why they do things.
Oh well,
I apologise imfitasacello I didn’t mean to come across as pushy, just supportive.
NovusDies, I’ll keep my thoughts to myself in future Thanks
I said "might". This is a message board and intent can be murky at times. No reason to go too far the other way. It is hard to know when to give advice because we all have to be ready for whatever step we are ready to take. I try to take my cue from whether or not the person is happy with their progress and their goal. However, I am no expert... I have put my foot in my mouth plenty of times and I will very likely do it again. Luckily this group is supportive and forgiving.
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andysport1 wrote: »andysport1 wrote: »imfitasacello wrote: »I’m so inspired and encouraged by all of your words. I’ve been at this since Monday, so I’m just figuring things out (technology wise) so I haven’t been commenting as much as I’d like on individual posts. Takes me so long! I’m so grateful to have this fairly anonymous source of support. I’ve limited myself to one drink a day four four days, which is huge. It seems that if I pass the one drink threshold, all bets are off and I’ll keep going. Evening boredom and social situations are challenges for me. My weight is down and I’m feeling good about my progress so far. Thank you all for your support.
Well done you,
Ask yourself why one drink?
Today take just a small sip and then sit back.
Now, have a think “do you really like the taste?”
I don’t want to know the answer, I just want you to know why you drink.
The reason alcohol makes people feel relaxed is because it blocks your brain from working correctly.
This might come across as pushing instead of just supporting. Her goal was one drink per day and she seems happy with it. This thread can be kind of tricky because less for some means moderation which can have countless definitions and for others means none or working towards none.
I certainly didn’t mean to come across as pushy
At no point did I say don’t drink, in fact I actually encouraged her to take a drink, when I learnt why I drank I found the solution that was correct for me.
I don’t push my solution on others
I think it’s useful that people understand why they do things.
Oh well,
I apologise @imfitasacello I didn’t mean to come across as pushy, just supportive.
@NovusDies, I’ll keep my thoughts to myself in future Thanks
If you keep your thoughts to yourself, they can't benefit any of us. Feel free to share, its appreciated.7 -
I drew us a picture.
It's called "Sufficient".
Didn't get round to explaining this yesterday.
This is all of us.
If we're an abstainer, this is us happily refusing any alcohol even though restaurants lay out wine glasses automatically. We're fine with that. We've already had our share in the past.
If we're a moderator, this is us happily refusing a drink that will put us over our limit for the week/month. We've had our share for now.
We can take it or leave it. We've had sufficient.11 -
I drew us a picture.
It's called "Sufficient".
Didn't get round to explaining this yesterday.
This is all of us.
If we're an abstainer, this is us happily refusing any alcohol even though restaurants lay out wine glasses automatically. We're fine with that. We've already had our share in the past.
If we're a moderator, this is us happily refusing a drink that will put us over our limit for the week/month. We've had our share for now.
We can take it or leave it. We've had sufficient.
This is beautiful, you are very talented! Thank you!3 -
Day 10 came & went
My thoughts came & went
Temptation came & went
I went to bed, proud, confident, with a sense of achievement.
Wow
Ok so it’s 7am on a Sunday in England
My want for alcohol is huge, the highest it’s been since day1.
I wonder
Is having a mini goal “Day 10” a mistake?
I wonder
After the achievement has my brain said
“it’s reward time”
OMG
I have to leave the house this is horrendous
This feeling is what I thought I’d feel everyday, I’d let my guard down.9 -
@andysport1, hang in there. I can relate to your feeling after Day 10. A "few" times that Day 10 has actually led me to think, "Wow, I did 10 days, so surely now I can enjoy one drink." I've finally learned that is lying to myself, but I do understand feeling very tempted around the 10-12 day mark.
It's 4 a.m. CDT here in the U.S., so it's 10 a.m. for you now. I hope by now you are feeling much better. Julie often mentions the "6-second" nature of cravings. I hope the last few hours have been good for you.
I'm up at 4 a.m. after having slept 1 hour. I've been out of touch lately trying to help my mom navigate a situation in which a business partner is taking very unscrupulous advantage of her, and she is having trouble standing up for herself. And yes, I've used wine to "comfort" myself. Stupid. It is not a comfort, and this sleepless night is a tough reminder. So back to non-drinking, which is much much better for me.
I believe I have discovered that I am not as anonymous as I thought on this board, so I'm backing off a little bit, but I'm certainly following and appreciate all the good thoughts.7 -
Oh, PS, I think it's 6 minutes. 6 seconds would be nice, but . . . .4
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@donimfp I too have used wine to "help" with a stressful situation. It doesn't help anything for me! Hang in there, Girl. Today is a new day.
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andysport1 wrote: »Day 10 came & went
My thoughts came & went
Temptation came & went
I went to bed, proud, confident, with a sense of achievement.
Wow
Ok so it’s 7am on a Sunday in England
My want for alcohol is huge, the highest it’s been since day1.
I wonder
Is having a mini goal “Day 10” a mistake?
I wonder
After the achievement has my brain said
“it’s reward time”
OMG
I have to leave the house this is horrendous
This feeling is what I thought I’d feel everyday, I’d let my guard down.
I hope you're doing ok. Keep us posted, I'm thinking about you.1 -
@andysport1 Just wondering if you ever write in a journal. I find journalling very helpful cause I can figure out what is going on inside of me when I write it out. It also helps to just vent it ALL!! If you haven't, I'd suggest trying it. Hope this helps somewhat. Hoping the best for you!! You can DO THIS!!!1
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Don't ask how or why but I have a terrible hangover. I'll work on a plan tomorrow. Today, I'm just trying to function. I did manage to cook dinner for the kids and wash the floors. Small positive to a bad day. Xo6
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@andysport1, hang in there. I can relate to your feeling after Day 10. A "few" times that Day 10 has actually led me to think, "Wow, I did 10 days, so surely now I can enjoy one drink." I've finally learned that is lying to myself, but I do understand feeling very tempted around the 10-12 day mark.
It's 4 a.m. CDT here in the U.S., so it's 10 a.m. for you now. I hope by now you are feeling much better. Julie often mentions the "6-second" nature of cravings. I hope the last few hours have been good for you.
I'm up at 4 a.m. after having slept 1 hour. I've been out of touch lately trying to help my mom navigate a situation in which a business partner is taking very unscrupulous advantage of her, and she is having trouble standing up for herself. And yes, I've used wine to "comfort" myself. Stupid. It is not a comfort, and this sleepless night is a tough reminder. So back to non-drinking, which is much much better for me.
I believe I have discovered that I am not as anonymous as I thought on this board, so I'm backing off a little bit, but I'm certainly following and appreciate all the good thoughts.
Ouch. I always think we are anonymous but I'm sure that's not always the case.
Sorry for your wine indulgence. It happens. And yes, the sleep disruption is a terrible but necessary reminder. Oh well, start fresh tomorrow. Xo
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Be kind to yourself Julie xxoo!4
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Had a rare occurrence today. Went to a baseball game completely sober! And it was lovely!
Usually we were the type to go hours early and tailgate, then go inside and buy an overpriced beer. Not today. We got there early so we could eat at a restaurant in the ballpark. I drank a Powerade with my meal (still overpriced, haha)
Hope everyone had a great weekend10 -
Going to bed at my regular time, having had 1 less beer than my limit. Unusual to say the least, lately. Have a good morning all!5
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Good Morning/Happy Monday all!
Just getting to work nice and early and drinking my coffee. Trying to not have the ole Monday blues... lol.
Made it through another weekend with no alcohol. I even went out multiple times, and my husband drank multiple times. I stuck with my water, kombucha, and la croix! Today will be day 9 with no alcohol and I've had 14 AF days this month.
This upcoming weekend will be the real challenge, as some friends are coming from out of town. One of the biggies on their list? Visit local breweries. But I'm not worried. I'll be DD! I can have fun without alcohol. I don't need it. And it'll be amazing waking up the next morning and feeling energized and refreshed instead of hungover!
Here's to a good week for all of us.12 -
Last night, I reached out to a friend who is an addiction counselor. I called him crying and said i need you. We talked for a half hour and today I'm meeting him to talk. I think his presence in my life will be helpful. He's taking me to my first AA meeting - I know some people love it and some people don't , but it may be the hope I need. I don't want to live always teetering on the edge.
P.s. My friend says it takes 3 days for alcohol to leave the system. So, that's good news. i always thought it was ten days.
@ErynVee great weekend for you! Like someone on our thread says, you are exercising your will power muscle.
@snoo61 Great job ! You set a goal and was under it. And you probably slept soooo well. Xo11
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