Not Hating, Why Do Women Struggle With The Gym?

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Replies

  • Sarauk2sf
    Sarauk2sf Posts: 28,072 Member
    I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.


    Personally, I am reluctant to go to the gym because it's much harder to faceplant on the sidewalk than on a treadmill, and it's free. Gyms are expensive, not the cleanest, and full of stinky, sweaty, people who, half the time, are there to get laid. Buying your own equipment (new or used) is a much better investment than going to a gym as well. I have been to plenty of gyms, and I already hate the way I look..and I don't really need for other people to see me and all of my jelly rolls bouncing around on an elliptical. Exercise is not fun, it is not pleasant, and it is not something many people want to share with the world. As a woman, I refrain from the gym because I have children and it's far more effective for me to give them puzzles and cartoons for an hour, than to leave them with a babysitter. I guess men like to show off more, too...which is understandable because who doesn't like to see some gym action from a sexy man..although it's not worth paying gym fees and getting ringworm. Oh, and, being exposed to sunlight increases dopamine levels....so fresh air and sunlight is far more effective for just about anything than being in a giant air conditioned room full of miserable people tearing their muscles up.

    I don't think I could agree less with a post :noway:

    Especially that last line. :noway:

    I am with you on this one!
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.


    Personally, I am reluctant to go to the gym because it's much harder to faceplant on the sidewalk than on a treadmill, and it's free. Gyms are expensive, not the cleanest, and full of stinky, sweaty, people who, half the time, are there to get laid. Buying your own equipment (new or used) is a much better investment than going to a gym as well. I have been to plenty of gyms, and I already hate the way I look..and I don't really need for other people to see me and all of my jelly rolls bouncing around on an elliptical. Exercise is not fun, it is not pleasant, and it is not something many people want to share with the world. As a woman, I refrain from the gym because I have children and it's far more effective for me to give them puzzles and cartoons for an hour, than to leave them with a babysitter. I guess men like to show off more, too...which is understandable because who doesn't like to see some gym action from a sexy man..although it's not worth paying gym fees and getting ringworm. Oh, and, being exposed to sunlight increases dopamine levels....so fresh air and sunlight is far more effective for just about anything than being in a giant air conditioned room full of miserable people tearing their muscles up.

    I don't think I could agree less with a post :noway:

    Especially that last line. :noway:
    I am with you on this one!
    yep
  • ashandstuff
    ashandstuff Posts: 442 Member
    Isn't everyone struggling in the gym? If you aren't struggling you aren't trying hard enough in your workout, just my opinion.
  • Iron_Feline
    Iron_Feline Posts: 10,750 Member
    Isn't everyone struggling in the gym? If you aren't struggling you aren't trying hard enough in your workout, just my opinion.

    I like your thinking :drinker:
  • Hauntinglyfit
    Hauntinglyfit Posts: 5,537 Member
    I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.


    Personally, I am reluctant to go to the gym because it's much harder to faceplant on the sidewalk than on a treadmill, and it's free. Gyms are expensive, not the cleanest, and full of stinky, sweaty, people who, half the time, are there to get laid. Buying your own equipment (new or used) is a much better investment than going to a gym as well. I have been to plenty of gyms, and I already hate the way I look..and I don't really need for other people to see me and all of my jelly rolls bouncing around on an elliptical. Exercise is not fun, it is not pleasant, and it is not something many people want to share with the world. As a woman, I refrain from the gym because I have children and it's far more effective for me to give them puzzles and cartoons for an hour, than to leave them with a babysitter. I guess men like to show off more, too...which is understandable because who doesn't like to see some gym action from a sexy man..although it's not worth paying gym fees and getting ringworm. Oh, and, being exposed to sunlight increases dopamine levels....so fresh air and sunlight is far more effective for just about anything than being in a giant air conditioned room full of miserable people tearing their muscles up.

    Whoa... slow down there, sunshine.
  • LaLa482
    LaLa482 Posts: 82 Member
    I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.


    Personally, I am reluctant to go to the gym because it's much harder to faceplant on the sidewalk than on a treadmill, and it's free. Gyms are expensive, not the cleanest, and full of stinky, sweaty, people who, half the time, are there to get laid. Buying your own equipment (new or used) is a much better investment than going to a gym as well. I have been to plenty of gyms, and I already hate the way I look..and I don't really need for other people to see me and all of my jelly rolls bouncing around on an elliptical. Exercise is not fun, it is not pleasant, and it is not something many people want to share with the world. As a woman, I refrain from the gym because I have children and it's far more effective for me to give them puzzles and cartoons for an hour, than to leave them with a babysitter. I guess men like to show off more, too...which is understandable because who doesn't like to see some gym action from a sexy man..although it's not worth paying gym fees and getting ringworm. Oh, and, being exposed to sunlight increases dopamine levels....so fresh air and sunlight is far more effective for just about anything than being in a giant air conditioned room full of miserable people tearing their muscles up.

    I don't think I could agree less with a post :noway:

    Especially that last line. :noway:
    I am with you on this one!
    yep

    You need a hug, I'd give you one but I just came from the gym.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    Lots of men dislike the gym, too. Not sure why this is exclusive to women.
  • jimmmer
    jimmmer Posts: 3,515 Member
    Lots of men dislike the gym, too. Not sure why this is exclusive to women.

    Strongly agree. I'm one of them.

    Although, I live in a rural backwater and the handful of gyms that are here seem to be entirely devoted to machines and cardio dohickeys, so maybe if there was a decent place, I might feel differently.

    Buying my own equipment was the best thing I ever did. And now I have it what do I need a gym for?
  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
    Probably the same reason I fear Zumba classes.

    Lycra.

    No wait, fear of the unknown. That's what I meant.
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    Wow. O..o lots of crazy in this thread.

    I use three gyms because of my travel, good, bad, ugly, and understand completely that some women (and men) don't like to go to the gym for a variety of real reasons. But from there to go and assign a whole bunch of projected bizarre intentions to the people that use it, the place, well just wow.

    It's fine that people wish to d o something else but it's a shame to systematically cut oneself off from one of the most effective training tools.

    Oh, and my gym serves beer.
  • jimmmer
    jimmmer Posts: 3,515 Member
    Oh, and my gym serves beer.

    See, I'd even go to a crappy gym if they served beer.....

    Guess I'll have to make do with the pub!
  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
    1. It's time consuming (women are still responsible for the majority of household tasks and child care, even though they are also expected to hold down full time employment)
    2. It's expensive (women still earn 3/4 of what men do for the same job)
    3. Creepers
    4. Body insecurities
    5. Lack of knowledge of how to use gym equipment.
  • willdob3
    willdob3 Posts: 640 Member
    No struggle for me. I love the gym. Specifically the weight room. I go, do my planned workout, then leave.
  • boehle
    boehle Posts: 5,062 Member
    I go to the gym 4-5 days a week.
    When I first started going, the guys did intimdate me and I wasn't sure how to use any of the weight machines... so I only did cardio at first... I watched people on the machines and one day, I just decided cardio was not going to do everything I wanted. I walked up to a machine and started using them. I am sure I don't look sexy but I am trying. I give myself A for always trying!
  • BattleTaxi
    BattleTaxi Posts: 752 Member
    I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.

    QFT. I get asked or "talked to" every day about my decision to build muscle. Both men and women ask me why I don't want to just "use light weights and tone my muscles", they tell me I am eating too much, I'm not doing enough, I'm not losing enough weight, or that I should just be happy with the way I am.

    I'm going to lift heavy.
    I'm going to lose fat.
    Anyone who tries to stop me will fail.
  • mygrl4meee
    mygrl4meee Posts: 943 Member
    I love the YMCA. I am confident in most of what I do there. However, I started this program called ActivTrax and it has me doing floor workouts and if a guy is near I feel odd and dont want to do it. When it comes to the weight room I feel akward. I feel insecue around all the buff, hot men knowing the machines and looking so strong that I just feel insecure and uncomfortable. If its really busy. Its almost too much for me to push thru. Sorry for any typos. On my phone.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.

    QFT. I get asked or "talked to" every day about my decision to build muscle. Both men and women ask me why I don't want to just "use light weights and tone my muscles", they tell me I am eating too much, I'm not doing enough, I'm not losing enough weight, or that I should just be happy with the way I am.

    I'm going to lift heavy.
    I'm going to lose fat.
    Anyone who tries to stop me will fail.

    Awesome attitude...

    ...and I suspect that the frequency with which you're challenged about it gives you a lot of opportunity to practice telling people to bugger off. Maybe that's what some of the people in this thread need to do...start practicing some assertiveness (or at least realize that 99.44% of the time, other people really aren't *that* invested in what you are or aren't doing).
  • Iron_Feline
    Iron_Feline Posts: 10,750 Member
    I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.

    QFT. I get asked or "talked to" every day about my decision to build muscle. Both men and women ask me why I don't want to just "use light weights and tone my muscles", they tell me I am eating too much, I'm not doing enough, I'm not losing enough weight, or that I should just be happy with the way I am.

    I'm going to lift heavy.
    I'm going to lose fat.
    Anyone who tries to stop me will fail.

    Awesome attitude...

    ...and I suspect that the frequency with which you're challenged about it gives you a lot of opportunity to practice telling people to bugger off. Maybe that's what some of the people in this thread need to do...start practicing some assertiveness (or at least realize that 99.44% of the time, other people really aren't *that* invested in what you are or aren't doing).

    Agreed - perfect your smile and nod face.

    If you don't like/know them and don't care practice this

    jennifer-lawrence-10.gif

    I used it on a guy at the gym who suggested squatting in the smiths machine. :noway:
  • cafeaulait7
    cafeaulait7 Posts: 2,459 Member
    I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.

    QFT. I get asked or "talked to" every day about my decision to build muscle. Both men and women ask me why I don't want to just "use light weights and tone my muscles", they tell me I am eating too much, I'm not doing enough, I'm not losing enough weight, or that I should just be happy with the way I am.

    I'm going to lift heavy.
    I'm going to lose fat.
    Anyone who tries to stop me will fail.

    Awesome attitude...

    ...and I suspect that the frequency with which you're challenged about it gives you a lot of opportunity to practice telling people to bugger off. Maybe that's what some of the people in this thread need to do...start practicing some assertiveness (or at least realize that 99.44% of the time, other people really aren't *that* invested in what you are or aren't doing).

    I think the stats might be different for women ;) Seeing a guy in the freeweights section isn't as much of a curiosity or chance for a lech as it is when the lifter is female. And I do have a feeling that some guys like to intimidate the women into hurrying up/going away more than they do the men, because they feel like it's easier to intimidate a woman (and it usually is). Unsolicited advice may happen as often for men, I think, because fitness people like to give advice. But that inevitability might even be higher for a woman, because it is more assumed (by macho guys) that a woman doesn't know what she's doing.

    As far as getting fit doubling as assertiveness training, it's probably true that it needs to be that when going to a gym. But not everyone is interested in or needs assertiveness training. Folks want to get fit. It would be nice if they could just get fit the way they enjoy, I think.

    I probably do need assertiveness training that makes my natural response less confrontational. I either get involved in more drama than I'm in the mood for, or I just try to ignore the person, which gets old when they keep pushing. Or is saying 'Go away. You're being a d*ck' accepted protocol, lol? :D
  • cafeaulait7
    cafeaulait7 Posts: 2,459 Member
    I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.

    QFT. I get asked or "talked to" every day about my decision to build muscle. Both men and women ask me why I don't want to just "use light weights and tone my muscles", they tell me I am eating too much, I'm not doing enough, I'm not losing enough weight, or that I should just be happy with the way I am.

    I'm going to lift heavy.
    I'm going to lose fat.
    Anyone who tries to stop me will fail.

    Awesome attitude...

    ...and I suspect that the frequency with which you're challenged about it gives you a lot of opportunity to practice telling people to bugger off. Maybe that's what some of the people in this thread need to do...start practicing some assertiveness (or at least realize that 99.44% of the time, other people really aren't *that* invested in what you are or aren't doing).

    Agreed - perfect your smile and nod face.

    If you don't like/know them and don't care practice this

    jennifer-lawrence-10.gif

    I used it on a guy at the gym who suggested squatting in the smiths machine. :noway:

    Ah! See, I've been doing it wrong. I'm more like a combo of these two:

    smokey-shoo.gif

    tumblr_inline_msm8xoKhmk1qz4rgp.gif

    :D:D
  • Iron_Feline
    Iron_Feline Posts: 10,750 Member
    I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.

    QFT. I get asked or "talked to" every day about my decision to build muscle. Both men and women ask me why I don't want to just "use light weights and tone my muscles", they tell me I am eating too much, I'm not doing enough, I'm not losing enough weight, or that I should just be happy with the way I am.

    I'm going to lift heavy.
    I'm going to lose fat.
    Anyone who tries to stop me will fail.

    Awesome attitude...

    ...and I suspect that the frequency with which you're challenged about it gives you a lot of opportunity to practice telling people to bugger off. Maybe that's what some of the people in this thread need to do...start practicing some assertiveness (or at least realize that 99.44% of the time, other people really aren't *that* invested in what you are or aren't doing).

    Agreed - perfect your smile and nod face.

    If you don't like/know them and don't care practice this

    jennifer-lawrence-10.gif

    I used it on a guy at the gym who suggested squatting in the smiths machine. :noway:

    Ah! See, I've been doing it wrong. I'm more like a combo of these two:

    smokey-shoo.gif

    tumblr_inline_msm8xoKhmk1qz4rgp.gif

    :D:D

    I think they are perfectly acceptable and may add them to my repertoire :drinker:
  • Otterluv
    Otterluv Posts: 9,083 Member
    I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.

    QFT. I get asked or "talked to" every day about my decision to build muscle. Both men and women ask me why I don't want to just "use light weights and tone my muscles", they tell me I am eating too much, I'm not doing enough, I'm not losing enough weight, or that I should just be happy with the way I am.

    I'm going to lift heavy.
    I'm going to lose fat.
    Anyone who tries to stop me will fail.

    Awesome attitude...

    ...and I suspect that the frequency with which you're challenged about it gives you a lot of opportunity to practice telling people to bugger off. Maybe that's what some of the people in this thread need to do...start practicing some assertiveness (or at least realize that 99.44% of the time, other people really aren't *that* invested in what you are or aren't doing).

    I think the stats might be different for women ;) Seeing a guy in the freeweights section isn't as much of a curiosity or chance for a lech as it is when the lifter is female. And I do have a feeling that some guys like to intimidate the women into hurrying up/going away more than they do the men, because they feel like it's easier to intimidate a woman (and it usually is). Unsolicited advice may happen as often for men, I think, because fitness people like to give advice. But that inevitability might even be higher for a woman, because it is more assumed (by macho guys) that a woman doesn't know what she's doing.

    As far as getting fit doubling as assertiveness training, it's probably true that it needs to be that when going to a gym. But not everyone is interested in or needs assertiveness training. Folks want to get fit. It would be nice if they could just get fit the way they enjoy, I think.

    I probably do need assertiveness training that makes my natural response less confrontational. I either get involved in more drama than I'm in the mood for, or I just try to ignore the person, which gets old when they keep pushing. Or is saying 'Go away. You're being a d*ck' accepted protocol, lol? :D

    Ummmm, I'm guilty of intimidating a guy out of the cage just this week. In my defense, my gym only has one and he was doing curls in it (light ones at that), and as part of a circuit no less! So, yeah.
  • starla5881
    starla5881 Posts: 190 Member
    For me it's because it's embarrassing and I have severe social anxiety. I go to the grocery store in the wee hours of the morning and won't step foot in a restaurant alone. I have been a complete panic-stricken mess the few times I've been to the gym and don't find the environment conducive to comfortably exercising. :frown:
    I feel you, because this was me for a very long time. But I'll tell you, it gets easier the more you do it. Social interaction in general and the gym in particular. There is no way around but through.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    Ummmm, I'm guilty of intimidating a guy out of the cage just this week. In my defense, my gym only has one and he was doing curls in it (light ones at that), and as part of a circuit no less! So, yeah.

    totally guilty of same thing and acceptable time to give someone the stink eye.
  • VelveteenArabian
    VelveteenArabian Posts: 758 Member
    I don't like the gym because it smells funny, I don't like being sweaty, I don't like being around sweaty people and most importantly, I hate guys checking me out. I stick to the group classes at the gym.
  • juliewatkin
    juliewatkin Posts: 764 Member
    Ummmm, I'm guilty of intimidating a guy out of the cage just this week. In my defense, my gym only has one and he was doing curls in it (light ones at that), and as part of a circuit no less! So, yeah.

    totally guilty of same thing and acceptable time to give someone the stink eye.

    Yeah. I'm done that on more than one occasion. I asked a young man to move because he was doing BB rows. He was confused until I showed him how to do them off the floor.

    I was very intimidated when I first joined a gym years ago. The more you learn, the less intimidated you become.
  • I am NOT hating. Just asking because this really interests me. IMO it's because they think it's all about running and loosing weight, and it's tied even deeper to their self-image than with men. Not to mention that women are not encouraged to be physically strong/able like men are.

    I know many, many women like the gym, but I'm making a general statement here.

    Discuss.

    LOSING weight you mean right? I don't think women struggle with the gym. I don't think it's all about running, but maybe I have a different approach than men? I'm not sure. For me going to the gym is also about having some quality time for myself. I love to do some weights, some cardio, a lot of stretching and planks. I use that time to work my body and feel physically better. I'm wanting to be more flexible that's my goal. Thanks for the post it made me think more about why I go and if there are other ways I can get something from being there.
  • Kennesaw24
    Kennesaw24 Posts: 50 Member
    For me, it is because I am unsure of what to do and I feel intimidated. ... Prior to working with the trainer I would do the treadmill or elliptical because that is what I knew how to do. It was easier to do what I knew than to be embarrassed for doing the weights incorrectly and being laughed at.

    I find this answer to be the most common. I would say the majority of girls never do "weight-lifting" in school so don't have any amt of comfort level with free weights. 25 years ago I somehow found out about Rachel McLish and I bought her book and taught myself what to do at the gym because I wanted to look like her. Lifting weights transformed my body then, and 25 years later it's still the best exercise I've ever done. But I go to the gym with a plan, I do my workout, I don't talk to guys -- usually don't even make eye contact. I'm not unfriendly, it's just that I am not there for the social aspect, and when that happens, it can really throw a girl/woman off because she suddenly feels self-conscious and not "into" her workout.

    When I say I go with a plan, I have all my exercises in my phone with most reps/sets/weights planned out and I stay focused. A lot of times I've looked up how to do exercises from my favorite online coaches, YouTube videos, etc. It takes time to plan a good workout. A lot of women don't realize this and feel lost at the gym.

    Getting on a treadmill, bike, elliptical is pretty easy, right? Learning what to do with weights and all that takes more effort.

    I do have to say my pet peeve with trainers is that sometimes I see them doing stuff with women they will NEVER come into the gym and do on their own, alone. I think trainers could do such a service to women by teaching them the basics and letting them know there's a lot of information out there to learn from.

    Maybe that kind of initiative doesn't happen until they start seeing some results first, after about six weeks.
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    It's cause I'm waiting for prince charming to come and save me in the free weight area, but all these dudebros and fitchicks are walking in front of me, ruining my damsel in distress plank pose.

    It's a struggle man.
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    It's cause I'm waiting for prince charming to come and save me in the free weight, but all these dudebros and fitchicks are walking in front of me, ruining my damsel in distress plank pose.

    It's a struggle man.
    it's a war.