Things people say when you lose weight
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'You're too skinny' or 'You don't need to lose weight' really peeves me off. I prefer when people say 'You're looking really fit!'10
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A colleague told me I looked better when I had more weight. I'm 1.63m (5'4?) and went from 84 kg to 54 kg over a year.
Kinda curious to see what my family will say when they finally see me again. I live in a different country and due to Corona, I haven't seen them in almost 2 years now. When I started my weightloss, I didn't say anything because I wanted to keep it to myself and kinda surprise them ... well, it's going to be a very late surprise now lol!12 -
I've gotten these:
"You've lost enough, don't lose anymore", , , hmmm seems like that oughta be my decision.
my favorite though:
"You look younger and fitter every time I see you", uh it's hard to be mad about that one!
Mostly, I try to display patience and gentleness and realize that I've commit so, so many faux pas in my time. I should be forgiving to others.18 -
At a funeral this past weekend, a lady that my family is acquainted with but neither my fiance or I know well (we're both in the process of losing weight before the wedding), gawked at us from across the room , and proceeded to walk up to us and say, "Y'all have lost A LOT of weight!" Big emphasis on "a lot".
I didn't realize me losing, like, 8 lbs and my fiance losing 17 lbs made such a big difference. From the look on her face, I swear she thought we were both huge before (My heaviest was around 158-160, my fiance's was around 215 I think). Which is kinda funny, because she's far from fit herself lol.7 -
Lately I had a lot of other moms ask me what my "secret" is, and when I tell them logging food and working it out they sort of tune out (I guess they are hoping for a secret pill). I have been working very hard on getting toned and lean and people comment on how good my arms look and when I tell them it's from doing weights, I have gotten "must be genetic" three times no w . Nope, not genetic, hard work.13
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Don't get skinny and or I havent seen you this small in forever.
Same person Said both, Ive lost 42 lbs and 36 to go and I wont be skinny but who asked that persons permission geez.6 -
I saw a friend last weekend that I hadn't seen in 18 months.
The first thing out of her mouth, spotting me from afar, was "You've lost weight, no?!". And then other stuff like "I didn't realise you had a waist and nice straight shoulders, an hourglass figure! You used to be more of a rectangle." and how much my face has changed, much less round.
No complaints from me, I've had so few people notice/acknowledge my weight loss so far. It was also a nice change to have someone ask me how I did it and actually listen to the answer12 -
They say, "You lost a lot of weight. Are you sick."6
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I have had this weird thing where at 'still overweight but not by much' people wanted me to stop losing weight. At my current weight which is within a healthy BMI I am getting 'you have more to lose' from the same people.
a-) not their business but whatever
b-) what.10 -
Ok, I've got to get it off my chest. My MIL. Grr. Last year around this time she gave me an oh so helpful comment 'your face looks gaunt, you should stop losing weight'. Thanks MIL, thanks. She doesn't realize it but I gave her the silent treatment for the better part of 6 months after that comment.
Yesterday, 'You look great! You sure you're not sick?' WTH. I freakin' can't stand her.
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"Did you get the surgery?"12
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Sometimes you get comments when you least expect them!
My BF booked us in for a dentist appointment this morning (on my birthday, thanks a lot, lol) and as soon as I stepped in, the dentist asked me if I had lost weight.
Mind you, I was still wearing a winter coat and a mask and she doesn't even know me well - I've only seen her twice and the last time was two or three years ago. She's got an amazing memory and observational skills!
It's funny seeing the different reactions to my weight loss, every one reacts just a bit differently based on their own situation and experience (although a common factor seems to be shock/disbelief when I mention how much I've lost, 65+lbs). So far, the reactions have been great, no one has been negative at all, and most who have asked about my strategy have been genuinely interested in my answer. I've been lucky, it seems, based on reading other people's reactions here.14 -
"What's your secret?" is my least favorite. There isn't one. I worked my *kitten* off.12
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I lost 71 pounds 4 years ago. All the comments I got were positive: "You look great!" "Wow; how'd you do it? (so I can do it too)" "You're my hero!" That last one kinda makes me feel bad now because I've regained a lot of it over the past year -- but I'm working on losing it again.10
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I lost 71 pounds 4 years ago. All the comments I got were positive: "You look great!" "Wow; how'd you do it? (so I can do it too)" "You're my hero!" That last one kinda makes me feel bad now because I've regained a lot of it over the past year -- but I'm working on losing it again.
You've done it once, you can do it again. We have all fell short on our journey. Not my first rodeo either!6 -
erniewebbiii wrote: »"What's your secret?" is my least favorite. There isn't one. I worked my *kitten* off.
I never mind "what's your secret." It's merely an expression.
Them: "What's your secret?"
Me: Patience, Dedication, Diet and Exercise.
/shrug7 -
A weird thing I've had lately, is I will have people ask me about what I've done - then they will simply tell me what they are doing. I'm never really sure how to respond to this. Like I don't know if they want me to comment on their "plan" or what? lol. I normally just pick a component of what they are doing that I am as well, and comment on how that's helped me and if there is nothing that I'm doing that they are - i try to pick a small piece and explain why I'm not doing that "for me."8
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Kaitie9399 wrote: »Ok, I've got to get it off my chest. My MIL. Grr. Last year around this time she gave me an oh so helpful comment 'your face looks gaunt, you should stop losing weight'. Thanks MIL, thanks. She doesn't realize it but I gave her the silent treatment for the better part of 6 months after that comment.
Yesterday, 'You look great! You sure you're not sick?' WTH. I freakin' can't stand her.
Wow - how toxic of her. I kind of hope I get someone like that telling me something similar so I can smile and gently, politely ask "why do you need to say such hurtful things? You may not realize it but that was incredibly rude." and then walk away.9 -
I literally just posted a PSA on my Snapchat today with things I have heard the last 4 days.
Not okay:
-You look so pretty now! (Soo I wasn't pretty before?)
-Don't lose too much! You're withering away! (I have 100 more pounds to lose before I hit my goal...)
-Stop losing! You're almost MY size! (Umm.... I was your size 40 lbs ago) (Of course I kept this to myself)
Okay to say:
-You look so healthy!! What are you doing? (Eating, exercising, and I had surgery to help me along the way.)
-Do you need a walking partner? (ALWAYS!!!)
-I brought food in. Is this something you can eat? (Maybe. Gotta check my macros!)15 -
Oh!! And my all-time favorite?
You had surgery?? Isn't that the easy way out??
Yeah, okay. You have your insides rerouted and go on a lifelong journey of macro-counting, vitamins all day every day, counting ounces of water, etc and tell me how easy I have it.15 -
I told my neighbour:
"Whatever you've been doing is clearly working for you, you look fantastic!"
And I've been overthinking it ever since I know she's been following a healthy eating plan, hadn't realised until she told me as part of this conversation that she's been going to the gym too. She's dropped at least a dress size, and I was really impressed by her commitment.
Yesterday I told her that she'd really inspired me (the truth) and that because of her I had rejoined the gym.
Back when I lost a load of weight, I enjoyed people noticing the weight loss. I didn't even mind people telling me not to get too skinny. What I can't stand, though, is people policing my food.
Why yes, I can eat this donut! Because I've planned for it13 -
x_stephisaur_x wrote: »Back when I lost a load of weight, I enjoyed people noticing the weight loss. I didn't even mind people telling me not to get too skinny. What I can't stand, though, is people policing my food.
Why yes, I can eat this donut! Because I've planned for it
Oh man! I get that all the time. I brought a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich to work and someone stared at me saying "You can eat THAT" (implied -'and still lose weight'). Yes. Absolutely, tons of people on this app have figured out ways to eat normal foods in reasonable portions.13 -
My favorite (and to be fair, I think some people do this when they're really not sure whether you've made changes to your life or that you could possibly be ill):
"You meant to lose weight, right?"
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Ghostofachance wrote: »My favorite (and to be fair, I think some people do this when they're really not sure whether you've made changes to your life or that you could possibly be ill):
"You meant to lose weight, right?"
The only people I've had that from is from medical people, and that's a fair question, as large unintentional weight loss can mean that something is very wrong.4 -
Absolutely! Weight loss or gain is a common side effect for a lot of medications and doctors should be checking that.1
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Absolutely! Weight loss or gain is a common side effect for a lot of medications and doctors should be checking that.
Or disorders. The thing that alerted me to the fact that my thyroid was misbehaving (again; we'll take the rest of it out in January) was that my weight loss, which had been trickling merrily along at a pound a week suddenly stopped dead.
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One of my friends squealed when she saw me and wrapped me in a big hug. "Look I can fit my arms around you and squeeze even tighter."
I've struggled myself trying to say the right thing to people who have lost weight. I am proud of them, knowing how hard they have worked to get there, and want to know what they've lost because I'm so inspired and hoping to be as successful as they are. I don't believe most people are trying to be cruel or to hurt my feelings. I don't get many comments these days because I think people are afraid to say the wrong thing. I'm 40 pounds down and have about 60 to go.13 -
My latest one
"Wow!! You lost weight!! How did you do it? I tell her and she says there is no way you did that and it worked!!"
My answer: "Yes, I did that, it did work and you can too if you want to; especially with a great support system".
This same person, then says, "Oh there are snacks out there. You can't have that though since you are dieting." I said, "Yes, I can if I wanted (which I actually don't). I am not on a diet. This is a lifestyle change/choice. I can eat anything I want in moderation. I do not deny myself any type of food." Then, I walked off.13 -
Before when at 210, telling people I have 65lbs to go "you'll be nothing but bones"
Most comments I get are positive now and then, though.
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Before when at 210, telling people I have 65lbs to go "you'll be nothing but bones"
Most comments I get are positive now and then, though.
That whole 'what will I look like if I lose x pounds' thing happens to people who are observing weight loss and people who are losing the weight. We look at ourselves and see the obvious places we store fat - we fail to account for the fact that on everyone, fat deposits basically everywhere. And that some of it is INTERNAL. Ie: Cannot be seen at all.
I have always carried my excess weight primarily in my chest and my gut.
I dropped a shoe size. I dropped TWO ring sizes. I lost weight from my face and my neck and the tops of my shoulders and calves and my forearms and wrists. I lost weight off my BUTT and I always had a flat butt (I thought) Places I never thought were 'fat', STILL HAD FAT and I still lost it from there.
But halfway through loss? People (including me) would looka t the obvious place I had excess weight, and be like 'there is no way you have 30lbs of stomach fat to lose, so if you lose more you will be a skeleton'.
Nope.
I wish by all that is holy that we could choose where we lose from, because I still. have. a. gut. and relatively large breasts. My shape has not changed at all. It's just a SMALLER version of that shape now. And it's still a flat butt, thinner arms and legs, and relatively big boobs.
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