Unexpected downsides of losing weight
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My knees and ankles are offset when side-sleeping too. I tend to sleep on my back a lot (I have a good mattress, and two different pillows depending on how my neck feels.)
I find that now that I'm a smaller size, I can afford wonderful designer clothes made for tall people in small sizes at thrift/consignment stores.
When I don't buy designer, I find that all sleeves and pant legs are too short. I'm 5'8" and 132 at goal (just bumped up a bit due to some medication right now, but getting it back to my 5 year maintenance weight again). I am quite fine boned so this isn't as low as it sounds... my feet are 8.5 AA and I can just circle my wrist with pinkie to thumb tip.
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I think the hardest thing for me this time around has been people not noticing. I mean I am losing for myself, but it is pretty dispiriting to have people not notice (except for family and health professionals) when I’m down 23.5kg already.
I don’t have many of the other problems on this thread - it has given me confidence, made it way easier to buy clothes (I’m tall so I had to lose weight to get back into the normal size range) and I don’t have Reynauds or saggy skin or any of that. I’ve been pretty lucky really!
I just now (86 pounds later) am having people say something. You know why one of them said they hadn't mentioned it? Weight is a touchy subject and she didn't want to offend me. I bet something similar is going on for many of you!9 -
wannabeskinnycat wrote: »QuinntessentiallyMe wrote: »Some of us, especially those of us who live on little money, get tired of having to buy new clothes. I've dropped 14 sizes, and have gone through at least 3 wardrobes. Even thrift store prices get to become a burden. At this point, I'm scouring 25 cent clothing piles at yard sales, and even yard sale leftovers left outside for free because I can't afford even Community Aid's half-off day prices. I'm still working on my body, and I appreciate the positive changes, but they come with a price.
This is something I’m not looking forward to. I’m only 22lb into a 100+lb loss and it’s going to take me a long time so I know I’ll be in each size for a while. I know I’ll be happy about being in a smaller size but not being able to afford nice new clothing will be tough. I’m already looking at skipping the next size down and thinking tracking bottoms, leggings etc. I can’t wear them for work so I’ll just have to take the hit on a few items and wear the life out of them. And I’m dreading buying new bras in each size.
I moaned to my hubby about it just the other day and he said think of the money we’re saving on food! I nearly launched my phone at him. Not that I’d ever say he’s right but it has made me think about putting away a little each week for when I’m ready to size down. And I’m going to check the charity shops each week for good quality pieces even if they’re way too small. Hopefully I’ll only spend the same amount I normally would over the same period.
Good luck on your clothing quest x
I've donated 5 large garbage bags of clothes, I have 2 more ready to go. EVERYTHING I own has been replaced and will have to be replaced again!6 -
dhiammarath wrote: »seltzermint555 wrote: »abowersgirl wrote: »The one thing I miss about being bigger is space. Before, I would ride the subway and people would give me a bubble because apparently being bigger meant I needed more breathing room.....now they practically grind up against me and squish by me as if there is so much room to play with 😥😥😥
YES! I have experienced this too. I seriously had no idea people were giving me so much extra berth in the past and now I feel (even after being relatively the same size for nearly 6 years) like my personal bubble is not big enough anymore!?
I also find that people (strangers, randoms) touch me more and it's not a good thing. Like if I am just in a store shopping female clerks will pet my hair (!?) or touch my shirt or whatever and say "ooh that's cute" and that legit NEVER happened to me until I lost weight. I'd kind of prefer people not touch me unless I expect it - like a hug from a close friend or of course my spouse.
That would drive me mad @seltzermint555 -- the touching thing. Maybe it's regional? No one here is touching me, thank goodness! Or maybe I've perfected my "I'm not social today" face. XD
Now, while people don't *touch* me randomly, I have caught them trying to squeeze my personal space. I've gotten good at the stretch and elbow jab. Weight loss has given me some super pointy elbows and I know how to use 'em!
Oh yeah I do think this happens a lot more "at home" (smallish city a little further south) than when I'm traveling in other areas. And I unfortunately seem to be very approachable because I'm always the one people come to with their question, problem, etc...always asked for help by customers in stores where I do NOT work, haha.
I have learned to work a little harder to keep my personal space though, I will very openly back up from a person who is standing way too close to me. It's so weird.2 -
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Posted in wrong thread, sorry!0
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I learned that clothes can only be tailored so much before they start to look weird and the tailor can't do anything, so my hopes of keeping my beautiful winter jackets is kind of shot.5
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abowersgirl wrote: »The one thing I miss about being bigger is space. Before, I would ride the subway and people would give me a bubble because apparently being bigger meant I needed more breathing room.....now they practically grind up against me and squish by me as if there is so much room to play with 😥😥😥
Another thing is proper fitting clothing. I am a conservative female who likes to be covered...I am not hiding I just don't like showing off everything outside of a beach but the smaller I get the fewer material on clothing I seem to find.
Yes it's hard to find tops with sleeves instead of those stupid little "caps" that don't cover your arm, and shorts that don't show everyone your business. I've bought mens shorts before because the legs were longer.
Gap and old navy carry full tees and longer shorts
Thanks for letting me know.
I like these Red Bubble relaxed Tshirts a LOT.
And you can get most any design on them.
https://www.redbubble.com/people/stevenrhodes/works/29239914-timmy-has-a-visitor?cat_context=all-departments&grid_pos=7&p=womens-relaxed-fit&rbs=029ebeb7-c316-4ddf-a79b-28f8b3cc86ad&ref=shop_grid&searchTerm=halloween
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abowersgirl wrote: »The one thing I miss about being bigger is space. Before, I would ride the subway and people would give me a bubble because apparently being bigger meant I needed more breathing room.....now they practically grind up against me and squish by me as if there is so much room to play with 😥😥😥
Another thing is proper fitting clothing. I am a conservative female who likes to be covered...I am not hiding I just don't like showing off everything outside of a beach but the smaller I get the fewer material on clothing I seem to find.
Yes it's hard to find tops with sleeves instead of those stupid little "caps" that don't cover your arm, and shorts that don't show everyone your business. I've bought mens shorts before because the legs were longer.
Gap and old navy carry full tees and longer shorts
Also ..Old navy carries shorts with different inseams or lengths.. 3, 5, and I think 7 or 8 inch inside seams.2 -
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Lillymoo01 wrote: »I’ve always found it much harder to shop for small sizes, like 2 or 4 (back in my much younger days, LOL). Stores stock more of the “average” sizes (8-12) because that’s what sells best. I was lucky if I found something cute in my size and I could never wait for it to go on sale because the store would have only ONE in my size. Some clothing catalogs don’t even carry size 6. It’s a problem with being smaller than the “average” (overweight) American woman these days.
I hear you with this one. I am an Australian size 6 which is an American 0. Finding clothes that fit is so hard as many clothing shops don't go lower than an 8. I often have to resort to teen shops or children's departments. Not ideal when you are over 40!
This!! I went jean shopping and I came across stores that the lowest size they carry is a 4. It was so frustrating! I am now a size 0 or 2, although I bought some jean shorts at Target last week and had to get a 00 due to vanity sizing. And I tried to buy some cute tank tops from there yesterday but the smalls were too big and they didn't have any xsmalls. And I am not even that small (5'5 125 lbs), it's not like I am underweight or anything.
I wish you wouldn’t call it vanity sizing. It’s not vanity to want clothes that fit and some of us need bigger sizes due to our height or genetics making it harder to lose weight. It’s not fair to make these people feel bad just because you fit into a very small size.
Vanity sizing is defined by manufacturers who sell clothing at lower sizes because it appeals to us, the consumers. A size 8 today is not the same size it was even a decade ago, and definitely not more. People of all sizes deserve to have clothing that fits and flatters, whatever their weight or body shape.
But the reality is, in order to produce larger cut clothing at smaller sizes, this leads to a phenomenon called "vanity sizing". Consumers feel good buying smaller sizes, so manufacturers keep making them smaller. The downside is that if you are small (due to genetics, etc, as you mentioned), you get left on the quasi tail of an unfinished snake. Because as clothing brands are making larger sized items in smaller sizes, this means that your smaller sizes have a kind of trickle off end into harder to find sized clothing.
The poster wasn't shaming anyone nor trying to make someone feel bad, but pointing out that vanity sizing isn't all that helpful, especially if you don't fit into the "norms" that vanity sizing aims for.
This article is very good at delving into the psychology of vanity sizing:
https://www.forbes.com/sites/rogerdooley/2013/07/29/vanity-sizing/#102480f41e32
"It makes shopping for clothes more difficult when manufacturers don't use the same standards for labeling, and no doubt increases return rates when products don't fit as expected. The simple answer is that the downsized labels make customers feel good."
"Conversely, larger size labels (for the same actual size clothing) reduced the self-esteem of the customer and, more importantly for brands, that negativity also transferred to the product itself!"30 -
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dhiammarath wrote: »Lillymoo01 wrote: »I’ve always found it much harder to shop for small sizes, like 2 or 4 (back in my much younger days, LOL). Stores stock more of the “average” sizes (8-12) because that’s what sells best. I was lucky if I found something cute in my size and I could never wait for it to go on sale because the store would have only ONE in my size. Some clothing catalogs don’t even carry size 6. It’s a problem with being smaller than the “average” (overweight) American woman these days.
I hear you with this one. I am an Australian size 6 which is an American 0. Finding clothes that fit is so hard as many clothing shops don't go lower than an 8. I often have to resort to teen shops or children's departments. Not ideal when you are over 40!
This!! I went jean shopping and I came across stores that the lowest size they carry is a 4. It was so frustrating! I am now a size 0 or 2, although I bought some jean shorts at Target last week and had to get a 00 due to vanity sizing. And I tried to buy some cute tank tops from there yesterday but the smalls were too big and they didn't have any xsmalls. And I am not even that small (5'5 125 lbs), it's not like I am underweight or anything.
I wish you wouldn’t call it vanity sizing. It’s not vanity to want clothes that fit and some of us need bigger sizes due to our height or genetics making it harder to lose weight. It’s not fair to make these people feel bad just because you fit into a very small size.
Vanity sizing is defined by manufacturers who sell clothing at lower sizes because it appeals to us, the consumers. A size 8 today is not the same size it was even a decade ago, and definitely not more. People of all sizes deserve to have clothing that fits and flatters, whatever their weight or body shape.
But the reality is, in order to produce larger cut clothing at smaller sizes, this leads to a phenomenon called "vanity sizing". Consumers feel good buying smaller sizes, so manufacturers keep making them smaller. The downside is that if you are small (due to genetics, etc, as you mentioned), you get left on the quasi tail of an unfinished snake. Because as clothing brands are making larger sized items in smaller sizes, this means that your smaller sizes have a kind of trickle off end into harder to find sized clothing.
The poster wasn't shaming anyone nor trying to make someone feel bad, but pointing out that vanity sizing isn't all that helpful, especially if you don't fit into the "norms" that vanity sizing aims for.
This article is very good at delving into the psychology of vanity sizing:
https://www.forbes.com/sites/rogerdooley/2013/07/29/vanity-sizing/#102480f41e32
"It makes shopping for clothes more difficult when manufacturers don't use the same standards for labeling, and no doubt increases return rates when products don't fit as expected. The simple answer is that the downsized labels make customers feel good."
"Conversely, larger size labels (for the same actual size clothing) reduced the self-esteem of the customer and, more importantly for brands, that negativity also transferred to the product itself!"
I just don’t like the use of the word “vanity” in that phrase, as though wanting the biggest size available in the shop to actually fit me was vanity.
I’m not saying short/small people should be left out, but as someone at the other end of the spectrum I’m fed up of being made to feel bad for taking a bigger size.
Vanity sizing is different from being sized out of a store. That's lack of extended sizes, which is also an issue. Vanity sizing is taking the same sizes and just making the number different, e.g. A size 16 measurement of the past is now a size 14. It can be very confusing for people, especially those on the edge of standard sizes, as they may go into one store and fit in their size 16, but go into another store and not be able to fit into a 16 at all and not be able to size up because that's the store's biggest size.12 -
When I was a size 16, there was a +/-20 pound weight range I could fit into and still fit all my clothes. Now, 4 pounds is a different pant size. I went dress shopping at Macy’s a few days ago and tried on a 10 that was too tight and a 4 that was too big. I have sizes 4-10 and S-L in my closet that all fit. It’s more confusing than ever!6
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Re: Vanity sizing - I was a size 10 most of my life. During that time, my weight varied from 120 to 175. My body changed and grew bigger but manufacturers labeled the clothes smaller and smaller so I was in denial that I was actually getting fat. If I still wear a 10, I have nothing to worry about, right? I have a very old pair of sized 10 jeans that fit me now, at 123, but if I go to the store I have to buy a 4 or a 2. It makes it impossible to shop online because I have no idea what will fit.9
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kimothyschma wrote: »When I was a size 16, there was a +/-20 pound weight range I could fit into and still fit all my clothes. Now, 4 pounds is a different pant size. I went dress shopping at Macy’s a few days ago and tried on a 10 that was too tight and a 4 that was too big. I have sizes 4-10 and S-L in my closet that all fit. It’s more confusing than ever!
So true, lol. Brand and shape make a big difference with me. I am a pretty solid medium in most brands I shop, but at Maurice's I'm consistently in smalls. If it has sleeves, I always size up. I can fit into sleeveless 8's just fine but since I prefer sleeves, I will say in general to people that I'm a size 10. Height is a big factor too. I still have plenty of weight to lose, but since I'm 5'1'', I'm going to hit smaller sizes sooner because I'm just proportionally smaller. It seems like that should be obvious, but so many think that you have to be high fashion model thin to fit into a size 2, but forget that those models are 5'10'' and therefore are skeletally bigger, so they have to be especially thin to fit sizes that small. A tall woman in a healthy weight range is going to need a bigger size generally.5 -
RE: Vanity sizing. If you want to for real, on purpose, be shamed as an obese person (or even "just" overweight per BMI) try shopping in an REI brick and mortar store. That'll do the trick every time. The majority of outdoor clothing manufacturer's never adopted the vanity sizing manure and it's nearly impossible to find anything above an "old school" (circa early 2000s) women's size 16 in pants/shorts unless you don't feel humiliated having to shop in the men's department.7
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spiriteagle99 wrote: »Re: Vanity sizing - I was a size 10 most of my life. During that time, my weight varied from 120 to 175. My body changed and grew bigger but manufacturers labeled the clothes smaller and smaller so I was in denial that I was actually getting fat. If I still wear a 10, I have nothing to worry about, right? I have a very old pair of sized 10 jeans that fit me now, at 123, but if I go to the store I have to buy a 4 or a 2. It makes it impossible to shop online because I have no idea what will fit.
Yeah, I am dreading this. I have a ton of clothes in storage from the early-mid 2000s when I was 138 through ~165 lbs. Most will be okay as far as not standing out as "old", but when they wear out? If I finally succeed in my weight loss and maintenance endeavors now that determination has shown up to the party, I will be adrift in a sea of new clothes sizing I don't understand as I missed the whole vanity sizing thing. I missed it because I have bought used/old stock clothes off of ebay as I've gained weight that are from circa early to mid 2000s as well so the sizing is still the same scale I've always known. But I can't dress like that forever 'cause that would be weird. And I can't exactly wear nylon shorts/skirts/pants/tops from outdoor companies who never adopted vanity sizing for business attire. And let's be honest; it will be hard for me to justify buying off the rack new and giving up on online shopping after so many years of perfectly good discounted clothing.3 -
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I just don’t think it is vanity that manufacturers are catering to by making their clothes sizes bigger to suit the population as it gets bigger. I think it is perfectly fair enough to adapt. I’m not saying that small people shouldn’t be able to get clothes, but I want, as someone who currently takes the biggest size in the shop (even after it has been “vanity sized”) I don’t think there is any shame in wanting clothes that fit. I don’t think “vanity” is the right thing to call it.
Unfortunately, that is what it is called. I truly wouldn't think too much into it. We all want the same thing - clothes that fit. At least there are plus sized stores available, I don't know of any stores that are for smaller than average individuals. I understand not everyone wants to have to shop at a separate store and I don't think that is how it should be, but at least there are stores available. I might have to resort to shopping online with stores that don't vanity size and just hoping something fits.
It is unfortunate our society as a whole is getting bigger, but I don't think that is going to change any time soon. I just read an article that women in American weight, on average, 18.5 percent more now than in 1960. Our health as a society is going to continue to suffer as our weight continues to increase. I can completely understand your point regarding vanity sizing becoming a necessity to keep with our growing population. Maybe someone will open a store for smaller individuals if there is going to be a gap in available clothing sizes.
The problem with plus size stores is that they cater to women who are shorter than average- when I was in the plus size range I had trouble buying trousers because the legs on the plus size ones were not long enough for me (I am 5”9) as they were clearly designed for someone about average height.
I always found it to be the opposite when I wore plus sizes. I was slightly shorter than you, at 5'8", but still a little taller than average. I felt like all plus sized clothing was cut perfectly for me. In fact, as I've transitioned into regular sizes over the past 6 years I've often felt that misses sized clothing is cut for someone a little bit shorter than I am. And when it comes to bust, forget it. Even at my very smallest I could never wear a size 8 dress because there was literally zero room for a large cup size. If I ever were to lose a considerable amount of weight from where I am now, I'd have to buy size 10 still and have it altered down.
I do remember a lot of plus size dress pants tended to be perfect or a little long and jeans a tad on the shorter side especially from late 90s to about 2005, and then it improved and they were long enough on me. I had several friends and acquaintances who wore plus sizing and were around 5'2"-5'5" and constantly complaining about plus sizes - especially at Lane Bryant, as I recall - being way too long for them in the leg and arm. It really never occurred to me at all that plus size stores cater to women who are shorter than average.
As for the term vanity sizing, I am a little confused about this whole conversation or debate. I have only heard the term "vanity sizing" used to describe the practice of clothing makers putting a smaller size label on a larger cut. Not calling it "vanity sized" instead of "plus sized". Perhaps I misunderstood.13 -
i think every sane human can agree that sizes that aren't an actual size are idiotic. I'll accept small medium and large, 32 inch, 38 inch, whatever, but who in the world was the moron that thought size 0 was something that made sense. Stahp it. I don't know how ladies put up with it, its just annoying to be so unclear on what you're looking at.11
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I see what you're saying, aes1219. That does make sense to me! I know when I was 14 years old I weighed the exact same as I do now, although it was 1990...and the smallest jeans I wore then were juniors 13 and ladies 14. Now I mostly wear ladies 10. Sure there are different cuts, stretchier fabrics, and I am sure my figure has changed some despite being the same weight right now. But I do think that is a sign (like others have mentioned) that TODAY'S size 10 isn't the 1980s or even 1990s size 10.4
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You didn’t say how old you are but if you’re getting up there then as you lose weight you see wrinkles on your face. The one pro of being overweight is that it plumps out the wrinkles. But better to look old than feel old right.9
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My late husband had severe raynauds syndrome. My research suggested changing from cod liver oil (for arthritis) to oil of evening promise. It worked pretty well! I hope it works.2
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To piggy back on the clothing piece: I am a US size 4/XS and I find that I cannot even find clothing at the Major department stores where things tend to be cheaper/ on sale more or I have coupons. I went shopping with my mom after I lost a good chunk of my weight and all of the department stores near me only go as far as a small, no XS and the small was rather large. At first I was overjoyed that I was too small for the smallest size in the store until I discovered that I would now have to shop almost exclusively at smaller boutique stores that carry my size but are much more expensive. If I go shopping with someone and I start to get agitated that the smallest size in the store is too big, they usually say something like or a sarcastic "poor you, you are too small for the small size" or "well that has got to be a nice problem to have!". And I know they mean well and it is a "nice problem to have" for about 5 minutes until you are trying to find a dress for a wedding and go to every single store in the mall but nothing fits and you end up having a small break down in the fitting room. I also wonder what women who are smaller than I am do for clothes. I wear an XS but there are plenty of women who are smaller than I am so I don't even know where they shop.13
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