For those who have lost and gained and are losing again (what I've learned)

starfruit132

I like the 2.5.5... "its the good habits ...not the actual results" that make me feel good. Keeps the focus on the process and the habits for the life-long journey! Thank you for sharing and stay strong.

yayamom3

@RelCanonical could you share some of your tips for dealing with your binge eating urges?

Rebecca81619

Love this post... thank~you for sharing!!

RelCanonical

yayamom3 wrote: »

@RelCanonical could you share some of your tips for dealing with your binge eating urges?

@yayamom3 The biggest help for me has been reducing my stress level through therapy, which for me was cognitive behavioral therapy. In probably-too-simple terms, I attempt to look at my issues from a more objective standpoint, determine what's in my control and what's not, and then attempt to change the things in my control, and let the rest go. Easier said than done, of course, but I've practiced and talked it out for several years with my therapist, and it really has helped. In short, reducing stress significantly reduced my urge to binge.

Secondly, I work on staying busy. Before, I had so much anxiety about my job that I'd do nothing in the evening, just trying to "rest" and distract myself from the next day. Now, I try to treat my mornings and evenings more as if I don't have work the next morning. I do projects, and work on things that will take a long time to accomplish (before, my mindset was "what's the point of working on this, I don't think I'm going to be able to finish it because of [insert anxiety event here, generally losing my job]).

I also had to discard my fear of gaining weight, and reduce my emotional attachment to food. My life had been so focused on food and losing weight that when it didn't go well, I was a wreck, it was like my whole day was ruined. Now, I've refocused on practicing self-care in all aspects of my life rather than just weight loss. Now, if I struggle with eating one day, it's such a smaller part of my life that any disappointment is easily made up for with my other accomplishments (taking care of my hair, skin, clothing, nails, even my cat's fur, nails, etc. lol). I am a major self-sabotager if I feel like a major thing has gone wrong, so instead I've created lots of things to go right.

MyFitnessMBA

Thank you for sharing- you have shared your truthful journey to success which makes me feel hopeful for my own goals as I strive to slowly ease off the roller coaster. Inspiring post!

dhiammarath

What a great post! Thank you for sharing and you look amazing!

d805

RelCanonical wrote: »

d805 wrote: »

Thank you for sharing. Back at it again after gaining all the wait I lost 2 years ago.

Good luck and smooth sailing to you. It took me four years to start again after the first time, so it's never too late. (:

Thank you.

LRLemon

I too have experienced loss (-84 lbs in 2014), then gain (+64 lbs over the next 3 years), then loss (-94 lbs over the past year). I've finally discovered what does not work and what does work for my body. A simple calorie-restrictive diet does not work: I never felt satiation and always relied on will power since cravings were constant. For me, will power is not a life-long way I can live. What works for me is a very low carb diet: my calories are about the same as the caloric-restrictive diet but now I feel satiated and don't have cravings or that crankiness that comes with feeling achingly hungry. For the first time I feel at peace...eating when I am hungry, but not feeling cranky, irritable or like I have to use will power to eat sensibly. I'm confident this is a lifelong way to eat...and my blood labs have significantly improved. I feel good.

oceanblue6

So much wisdom here! Thank you for sharing— I needed this today. Wishing you continued good health in all ways.

Satisfiedwithbetter

Read and apply character affirmations... Never Binge Again! It has changed my life.
I came across this in an interview on Inspire Nation sometime in April of this year, and honestly the talk was life changing. Glenn’s knowledge and experience with the mind and how to understand it and deal with it, for the first time in my life gave me power over the addiction to food that I have been plagued with my entire life. Until that interview, I never realized the difference in my thoughts. I just knew my willpower could only do so much before I would become another diet victim, abandoning the current diet and gaining all the weight back and more. I started this journey at approximately 480lbs in November of 2018. I know it was approximately 480 lbs because my scale would only go to about 450lbs then error out. I would put my hand on the counter and push down until it registered under 450. I would then put the scale on the counter and approximate how much pressure I would apply to get a number to add to the previous number. Now I weigh 396lbs, and I plan to weigh 195lbs at some point in the future.

Anyway, after downloading and reading the free book in April, I developed a list of affirmations. I tried using the unrestricted and conditional affirmations in the book, but my primal brain seemed to keep thinking of a way around them, so I created similar never and always affirmations that seem to really control my thoughts. This “unfolding” in my latest journey, has and continues to make all the difference between now and my history with food.

The interview:
https://inspirenationshow.com/inspire-651-glenn-livingston-never-binge-again/

The free book:
www.neverbingeagain.com

Satisfiedwithbetter

My character affirmations....
I am the kind of person that:

Never

• Never harms myself with food.
• Never eats heavily processed foods, they prevent my body from absorbing vital nutrients, cause inflammation, and increase my risk for heart disease and diabetes.
• Never eats processed or refined sugars, they are nutrient deficient, cause inflammation, and increase my risk for heart disease and diabetes.
• Never eats “Pig Slop.” “Pig Slop” is defined as heavily processed, highly engineered, extremely addictive, “Franken (pseudo) foods,” full of sugar, unhealthy fat, and or salt.
• Never listens to “The Pig” in my brain. “The Pig” is the primal center of the brain commonly referred to as the amygdala. “The Pig” likes to eat pig slop, and pig slop goes in a pig trough, and I don’t eat “Pig Slop” or eat out of a pig trough or listen to “The Pig” because pigs are farm animals and have no idea what is good for me.
• Never listens to “Pig Squeal!” “Pig Squeal” is the negative counterproductive thoughts in my brain, coming from “The Pig.”
• Never buffers my feelings or emotions. Using alternative coping skills such as taking a walk, listening to a podcast, or creating a checklist are much healthier ways of dealing with feelings and emotions.
• Never needs to recover from eating a meal.
• Never eats more than two servings of fruit or nuts per day.
• Never eats more than one teaspoon of Stevia per day.
• Never eats beef more than 3 times in a week.

Always

1. Always uses the present moment to be healthy.
2. Always treats myself with patience and love.
3. Always fails forward by learning and growing from my experiences.
4. Always loves my friends and family unconditionally.
5. Always treats others as I would like them to treat me.
6. Always allows people to judge me, have an opinion about me, and not like me.
7. Always gives myself permission to be vulnerable and trust others.
8. Always allows myself to experience my feelings and emotions without buffering. Buffering is the act of suppressing your feelings by eating or using some other activity to avoid the feelings or emotions.v
9. Always gives myself permission to be hungry and use my excess fat as energy.
10. Always gives myself permission to stop eating and listen for my fullness signal.
11. Always gives myself permission to fast for at least 12 hours daily
12. Always eats as many servings of raw Non-Starchy Vegetables as I desire.
13. Always commits 100% to myself, to my goals, & to my dreams!
14. Always drinks 16 ounces of water and waits 5 minutes before eating snacks or second helpings of food.

NattySchmatty

I needed to hear ALL of these things. Thanks for posting.

randielizabethwatts

Awesome post. Probably the most relevant and helpful post I’ve read.

strongernurse

RelCanonical wrote: »

6. I will have to live with my urge to binge eat the rest of my life, but I have good ways to cope now. That's a big part of life, just learning how to cope healthily.

How do you cope instead of binge eating? Need help.

cyaneverfat

Satisfiedwithbetter wrote: »

My character affirmations....
I am the kind of person that:

Never

• Never harms myself with food.
• Never eats heavily processed foods, they prevent my body from absorbing vital nutrients, cause inflammation, and increase my risk for heart disease and diabetes.
• Never eats processed or refined sugars, they are nutrient deficient, cause inflammation, and increase my risk for heart disease and diabetes.
• Never eats “Pig Slop.” “Pig Slop” is defined as heavily processed, highly engineered, extremely addictive, “Franken (pseudo) foods,” full of sugar, unhealthy fat, and or salt.
• Never listens to “The Pig” in my brain. “The Pig” is the primal center of the brain commonly referred to as the amygdala. “The Pig” likes to eat pig slop, and pig slop goes in a pig trough, and I don’t eat “Pig Slop” or eat out of a pig trough or listen to “The Pig” because pigs are farm animals and have no idea what is good for me.
• Never listens to “Pig Squeal!” “Pig Squeal” is the negative counterproductive thoughts in my brain, coming from “The Pig.”
• Never buffers my feelings or emotions. Using alternative coping skills such as taking a walk, listening to a podcast, or creating a checklist are much healthier ways of dealing with feelings and emotions.
• Never needs to recover from eating a meal.
• Never eats more than two servings of fruit or nuts per day.
• Never eats more than one teaspoon of Stevia per day.
• Never eats beef more than 3 times in a week.

Good that it's worked for you and congratulations on losing so much weight, but this seems a bit extreme to me.

RelCanonical

strongernurse wrote: »

RelCanonical wrote: »

6. I will have to live with my urge to binge eat the rest of my life, but I have good ways to cope now. That's a big part of life, just learning how to cope healthily.

How do you cope instead of binge eating? Need help.

I really had to decrease the emotional importance of eating in my mind. Thing is, I'm horrible at decreasing things, cutting things out, pushing things away. The moment I make an attempt, it's like that thing is suddenly in the forefront of my mind.

Instead, I had to focus on filling my life with things that I made MORE important. Things like walking, caring for my cat, completing a fun project, doing self-care, etc. Making myself busy with things I love. I was also able to reduce stress in my life through cognitive behavioral therapy. This was big because I didn't even have to worry about as many coping mechanisms because I had to use them less (because I'm less stressed overall). This was a long process but boils down to me stepping outside myself and determining if the thing that is stressing me is worth stressing about.

I don't know about your specific situation, but I also had to stop the cycle of binge eating before I could focus on losing weight again. I had to slow down my eating and re-establish a love for food. During my binges I would HATE food, with all my being, because I was eating it and could not control it. That was really the main difference between binge eating and overeating - whether I loved the food I was eating. I seriously thought I was going to hospitalize myself because there was sooo much salt in the food and I wasn't drinking anything, coupled with the anxiety I'd have during that time, that my heart would race. I had to slow it down.

So, I started cooking again, not anything fancy or healthy, just my favorite foods, sat down and just ate meals instead of trying to distract myself all the time. I relearned how to spend my time without food but also with food, and learned to appreciate the food on my tongue again. I forgot about my weight for a moment and just focused on establishing a more balanced eating pattern that made me feel better. Once I was able to get to a point where I safely felt I would not binge again, I then started to work on portions again and adding in more nutritionally dense foods to improve my overall health.

Sorry if that was a little ramble-y. I hope it helped!

Nanalove2018

What an amazing post. I tell people all the time, weight loss does not fix everything, in fact it exposes the cracks of things that were already broken. For example, as you stated, self esteem sometimes takes a bigger fall because you associate your weight with your self worth. So proud of you !

Mernalove26

This was honestly so perfect to read.
My weight in 2011 was 226 and by 2013 i was 152 lbs. last year i finally weight myself after not working out for years, i was 196 lbs and i was devastes that i almost was 200 lbs again. Everything you write resonates with me so well. Since December 2018 until now i currently am at 172 and i just feel better because I’m making time to eat and excercise, having a healthier lifestyle that leads to an amazing weight loss journey.

Thank you again for this post ! 💜

RelCanonical

Mernalove26 wrote: »

This was honestly so perfect to read.
My weight in 2011 was 226 and by 2013 i was 152 lbs. last year i finally weight myself after not working out for years, i was 196 lbs and i was devastes that i almost was 200 lbs again. Everything you write resonates with me so well. Since December 2018 until now i currently am at 172 and i just feel better because I’m making time to eat and excercise, having a healthier lifestyle that leads to an amazing weight loss journey.

Thank you again for this post ! 💜

It was nearing 200 that really made me very upset as well. I that's when I realized that I had gained all my weight back plus a few extra pounds. I knew I couldn't continue, and a job change finally gave me the wherewithal to say "if you can change your job in your current state, you can lose weight too." I didn't think I would ever be able to quit my job and find another, but I did, and that made me realize I could lose weight again because I believed in it.

try2again

Thank you, @RelCanonical - great post! I've taken a lot away from it and your subsequent comments, primarily the need to make self-care and addressing mental health issues an integral part of the process.

victory291

This is SO GOOD. I screenshot your list to save. Thank you😊 @RelCanonical

cmriverside

I don't know how I missed this thread, but I heart it.


You are so lovely, inside and out.

There is a way out! That's the takeaway.

RelCanonical

cmriverside wrote: »

I don't know how I missed this thread, but I heart it.


You are so lovely, inside and out.

There is a way out! That's the takeaway.

Aww, thank you!

And yes, as long as you can get up again, failure is just practice for success. That's what I always tell myself if I am struggling. I figure out why I'm struggling, and just count that time as practice.

cmriverside

Yup.

Also you look like that girl...that internet girl... yeah, I know that's super helpful...the one who did those great duets with that other chick...about men and turning 30 etc.

Garfunkel and Oats.

RelCanonical

cmriverside wrote: »

Yup.

Also you look like that girl...that internet girl... yeah, I know that's super helpful...the one who did those great duets with that other chick...about men and turning 30 etc.

Garfunkel and Oats.

What a name! But I can see the resemblance. Both dark-haired, both part of the big-eyed crew, lol. She's also got a bit of a square-shaped face like I do, which I used to hate but now appreciate. It definitely helps to have it much more defined now.

ATX_123

RelCanonical wrote: »

During my binges I would HATE food, with all my being, because I was eating it and could not control it. That was really the main difference between binge eating and overeating - whether I loved the food I was eating. I seriously thought I was going to hospitalize myself because there was sooo much salt in the food and I wasn't drinking anything, coupled with the anxiety I'd have during that time, that my heart would race. I had to slow it down.

This was so me for about last couple of months.. I went to a doctor and was told that I have high blood pressure and I am pre-diabetic.. A wake up call. Your post is am inspiration. I gained and lost and gained twice as much and now trying to lose again. Stress is definitely a biggie..

girlwithcurls2

How did I miss this post before?? Thanks for putting so many helpful thoughts into one succinct post. Focusing on being healthy and less on weight loss has been a big mind change for me.

As always, @RelCanonical , your wise words resonate. Thank you

Unknown

This content has been removed.

swim777

Thanks so much for this! I lost 74 lbs and maintained for two years and then began to struggle. I struggled with the restricting and binges and watched the pattern increase. I am finally feeling back in control although I do have a bad day once in a while. Forgiveness is big. Journaling helps me. And mostly, I have to remember this is my life. While I’m losing, I have to remember that maintenance will come again, and I don’t want to be miserable. What are realistic goals for me that I can continue? And being strong, healthy, and happy are really more important to me then chasing an unrealistic goal.
Thanks again for sharing your wisdom!

Unknown

This content has been removed.