Fat-positive Feminism and Weight Loss

Sapporo

Hello all,

I'm writing to see if there are any other people out there who consider themselves fat positive but are still trying to lose weight. I consider myself a feminist and part of that is accepting and loving my body as it is, at any given time, so I'm finding it difficult to reconcile my desire to lose weight and be healthy and remaining fat-positive. I'm feeling like a hypocrite and wondering how much of my desire to loss weight comes from societal pressure to conform to a thinner silhouette.

Any other fat-positive feminists out there? How are you dealing with this?

Thanks for your thoughts!

You you can love your body now and still want to lose weight without being a hypocrite. Forget about the conformity and pressures of society, do what you have to do to live a healthy life. Really loving yourself and your body means you take care of yourself. Staying fat would not give you an feminism points since it really has nothing to do with being a feminist and it sure doesn't show that you love your body putting all that pressure on it with extra weight, the fat built up around your organs, the health issues and risks you are putting your body through... that shows you actually do not love your body, there is nothing positive about being fat.

Fat positive is a dumb term. I think fat acceptance makes more sense. Fat people are just as worthy as skinny people and we all deserve equal respect. That doesn't mean stay fat. Lots of people have tried explaining it already, just hope you start to understand.

trojanbb

Is fat positive the same as the fat acceptance movement?

I don't know, but that was my assumption. Obesity is a disease. "Fat positive" is an oxymoron. Would you say you're "cancer positive"? "MS positive"?

At some point in America an idea took hold that everyone has to feel good about about herself or himself all the time, to the point where one is not only supposed to tolerate obesity, but argue it's a good thing. It's not.

exactly. embracing mediocrity is a defense mechanism

pamelak5

I consider myself feminist and body positive. I don't believe that anyone should have their value as a person judged based on their weight, appearance, or ability. I have people I love in my life of all different sizes, and I accept and love them where they're at. However, I don't think it is incompatible to love/accept/don't judge someone where they are at, and also endorse a healthier lifestyle.

I think it's important to love yourself and your body - but loving it invokes taking care of it. I don't want to body-shame anyone, including myself, but no one does themselves any favors by remaining unhealthy, making choices that will, in the long run, affect mobility and even life span. It's hard for men to "get" how much emotional and societal baggage women have about weight and their bodies,and I appreciate a lot of the affirming parts of the "fat positive" movement - but I also think it enables women to not have to heal the relationships they have with food or their bodies. If you're "perfectly fine" the way you are then you never have to change anything or understand why you overeat or overcome your fears of working out, and you never get to be amazed by watching yourself rise to a physical challenge and meet it. It seems like a bandaid to cover/redefine the situation, not a solution. And I think it may do as much harm as it does good.

So, for me, I am body positive. I don't talk *kitten* about my body or anyone else's, I try not to judge myself, I challenge body shaming, and I take myself and others where they're at. But I also owe it to myself and my kids to make the most out of this one life I have, and this one body I have. And that means confronting my own issues with food, getting myself to a healthy weight, and getting myself active and strong.

This, 100%. I am absolutely a feminist and I don't see how respecting my body is at all at odds with being a feminist. Feminism means that men and women should be respected equally and are deserving of the same opportunities. How is devaluing your body by treating it like garbage at all in line with feminist ideals of respect?

bohomaze

They are days when I simply like what I see while looking in mirror. With all my flaws, with my plus size. I still do want to lose weight, but I think its better to start your weighloss with positive attitude, not only about your journey, but mostly about yourself, so I think I am.
Confidence does not comes in specific shape. It simply comes from inside. Wether you weight 200 or 100 pounds, you can still love yourself.

TheBaileyHunter

Big thanks to everyone, all of these posts are extremely helpful

To me, being fat positive is about knowing what it means to be fat (or big, or overweight, or curvy, or whatever other adjective does it for you), including the negative health effects, and choosing to be that way anyway. I've recently been conceptualizing choosing to be fat as a way to "fight the power" so to speak, to challenge societal standards of beauty and femininity. However, I really do want to be healthy, and to feel physically comfortable in my own skin.

I think instead of struggling with whether or not to lose weight I'll choose health and comfort over obsession with body weight and dress size.

Thanks again everyone!

I think maybe a better term that would give you less internal turmoil would be Body Positive. Having a positive self-image no matter what body you're in and striving to make it the best you are comfortable with

bohomaze

But I am sceptical to all this fat-acceptance talking, as being overweight is a disease/leads to a disease.

ehorn625

Well, I'm a feminist, and I'm positive that I'm fat. Does that count?

LOL!

Joreanasaurous

I am trying to fight my natural urge to roll my eyes at someone declaring themselves a feminist. I am a humanist, I believe in empowering all people. Regardless of gender, age, ethnicity, sexual orientation, or weight. I was perfectly fine with myself and my body image at 320lbs.

But I was wrong. It was unhealthy. It was affecting me badly. Just like anorexia, it is a disease. A disease that can kill you. Most pro-ana people are 'fine with their body image'. It doesn't mean they're any less sick. Same goes for extremely obese people like myself. Once I realized this, losing weight became more important.

I am never going to be 'skinny'. But I want to be a healthy weight for myself and my son. That's my positive body image.

slim4health56

Oh, sister! There's nothing positive about being overweight...if you're truly overweight. Excess fat is hard on the joints, pancreas, liver, heart, et cetera and the list of diseases that accompanies obesity is extensive. Respect for your health is not counterproductive to feminism.

irakrishna1

I totally get this...I never knew there was a name for it though? I love myself, I love my body and I love my life. I am happy:) My body has produced two of the most beautiful human beings ever to walk the earth. I can hike, play with my kids, travel,make love and most importantly I can look in the mirror and be thankful for my reflection. The fact is, carrying weight for a lifetime, no matter how happy a person is, will eventually cause problems and essentially shorten a human life and i don't know about you but I want to give myself every chance of a LONG and HEALTHY life so I can continue on the road I'm on:)

Beautifully said! Totally reflects my thought...:)

etoiles_argentees

It only really makes me mad when their justifications for this are things like, "Men like Real Women...and Real Women have curves." What does that make me, then? A Paper Woman? A Doll Woman? Am I imaginary? Eff you!

Also, I think that when it is used merely as a way to get out of exercising and eating healthily, or to justify eating nothing but 30 Big Macs a day, it's stupid. At least have the common sense and maturity to own your issues and say, "Yeah. I'm overweight and it's not healthy. But I'm okay with myself." Not "Fat is Better".

Big can be beautiful, but when someone is morbidly obese I do not personally find that beautiful. There is a distinct difference between the two...and the person who is 500+lb, and is saying that they are a part of a 'movement' needs help.

Also...some of these people outright attack skinny people, and totally demonize eating disorders. It's outrageous. That's not cool.


Be proud of your size, of your body, love yourself, cool. But don't degrade others in order to make you feel more socially acceptable.


"For beauty is nothing but the beginning of terror, which we are still just able to endure, and we are so awed because it serenely disdains to annihilate us. Every angel is terrifying." Ranier Maria Rilke, Duino Elegies

Galathea96

If being fat-positive means accepting myself even when I'm completely out of shape with fat bulging out everywhere then I guess you'll have to call me a fat-negative feminist. I was overweight and I hated it. I hated being out of shape and out of breath when climbing stairs. I hated not being able to run 500m without collapsing. I hated how I couldn't button my jeans or how the fat would just bulge out no matter what I wore. I disagree with the view that I should have been positive about how I used to be. No, it was unhealthy, self defeating and me hating that I was fat was good and also the catalyst for me finally realising that I needed to change. There was nothing good or positive in me being fat. Just the opposite. I had settled, become lazy, complacent and put my health at risk. I got gout, at 27!

I also don't believe that accepting being fat has anything to do with feminism. Being a feminist shouldn't mean accepting mediocrity and settling with regards to one's health. Instead it should include trying to be the best version of yourself that it's possible to be. Everybody (not only feminists) should be able to be straight and honest with themselves regarding their own health and not sugar coat hard truths and admit the fact when they're fat and then do something about it.

emmalouc93

Feminist or not, if you're overweight, you should be striving to be healthier for yourself.

Feminism has little to do with this, and it is often used an excuse to be 'body positive'

I'm all for loving your body, but a time should come where you know it is wrong to be a huge size, and if you don't agree, you wouldn't be on this site trying to be a healthier you.

I don't consider myself a feminist in the modern meaning of the word by any means.

emmalouc93

If being fat-positive means accepting myself even when I'm completely out of shape with fat bulging out everywhere then I guess you'll have to call me a fat-negative feminist. I was overweight and I hated it. I hated being out of shape and out of breath when climbing stairs. I hated not being able to run 500m without collapsing. I hated how I couldn't button my jeans or how the fat would just bulge out no matter what I wore. I disagree with the view that I should have been positive about how I used to be. No, it was unhealthy, self defeating and me hating that I was fat was good and also the catalyst for me finally realising that I needed to change. There was nothing good or positive in me being fat. Just the opposite. I had settled, become lazy, complacent and putting my health at risk. I got gout, at 27!

I also don't believe that accepting being fat has anything to do with feminism. Being a feminist shouldn't mean accepting mediocrity and settling with regards to one's health. Instead it should include trying to be the best version of yourself that it's possible to be. This includes being straight and honest with yourself regarding your own health and not sugar coating hard truths and admitting the fact when you're fat and then doing something about it.

This, a million times over.

LeviLeDoux

Having a positive attitude about being overweight is counterproductive to personal growth and overall fitness. Not taking care of yourself shows blatant disrespect and disregard towards your body and health. -_-

gwenandersen

I consider myself a fat-positive feminist. I've long tried to argue in favor of us loving our bodies as they are. Body hatred, fat hatred are very effective forms of internalizing oppression.
That said - my family has an extremely strong history of diabetes and I don't intend to get it. Exercising and watching what I eat is key to this. Taking care of my body is putting love into practice. I also found that, over the years, as I exercised, I REALLY began to love my body. I loved that it could run further and faster. I loved that it could lift increasing amounts of weight. I loved what it could do in yoga. I didn't have to be slim to develop this appreciation for all that my body could do. It was great for self-confidence overall because these were accomplishments that could not be explained away as anything other than my work and my persistence.
Worry about the health indicators, not the vanity indicators. If the vanity indicators improve, consider this - a slim woman who is fat positive has more influence on public opinion than a large woman who is fat positive. Why? Because everyone blows off what the fat woman says. A straight woman who is advocating for acceptance of LGBT can be more effective because people will listen to her when they would not listen to the lesbian. A straight man can be even more effective. A straight male football player can be even more effective. As these are true for LGBT issues, they are also true for fat issues.
And good luck taking good care of you.

slim4health56

I don't consider myself a feminist in the modern meaning of the word by any means.

From Merriam-Webster:

Feminism: : the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes

Just curious...which part of this don't you believe in?

wild_wild_life

To me, feminism is about freedom. Freedom from conventional rules, mores and restrictions. If you're reacting against something (I'm going to be fat because they tell me I shouldn't), you're not free.

salladeve

I don't understand how wanting to lose weight to be healthier has anything to do with being a feminist. I have always felt very strongly about the equality of the sexes, and therefore a feminist (since the late 1960s I might add). I don't feel in any way that wanting to be a healthy weight interferes or contradicts that philosophy. IMO it is just an excuse to stay fat.

bumblebums

Just my opinion... but weight has about as much to do with my kind of feminism as origami does....

Feminism as a movement is striving for equal treatment/rights/pay etc for women and pursuing our inalienable right to be valued and treated with respect.

*jumps off high horse*

Jenny :-) xx

If fat women get treated differently than fat men, isn't that a feminist issue? Body politics affects all of us; women's bodies get constantly scrutinized and commented on. The range of what counts as "acceptable" appearance and behavior is narrower for women than for men. This is true not just in the stupid media but also in the work place, so it is relevant.

Anyway, you can be fat and kick some serious *kitten*, like Holley Mangold here:



I just want to be healthy and independent, and I would like to continue being that way for some time. For me, that means keeping my body fat percentage within a relatively low range. What other women do with their bodies is none of my business.