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What’s a red flag for you?
Replies
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I can only see red in hindsight9
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George_of_the_Jungle wrote: »Goes more than 24 hours without contact
I don't want someone who CAN'T go 24hrs without contact, especially early in a relationship. Yikes.18 -
tinkerhellraiser wrote: »George_of_the_Jungle wrote: »Goes more than 24 hours without contact
I don't want someone who CAN'T go 24hrs without contact, especially early in a relationship. Yikes.
if i havent heard from someone in 24 hours i assume they are dead
and if it’s early in a relationship who’s going to tell you? I’ll be thinking they ghosted but really they were run over by a pickle truck.8 -
tinkerhellraiser wrote: »your_future_ex_wife wrote: »tinkerhellraiser wrote: »George_of_the_Jungle wrote: »Goes more than 24 hours without contact
I don't want someone who CAN'T go 24hrs without contact, especially early in a relationship. Yikes.
if i havent heard from someone in 24 hours i assume they are dead
and if it’s early in a relationship who’s going to tell you? I’ll be thinking they ghosted but really they were run over by a pickle truck.
and THEN if they message me after like 36 hours i will be soooooo mad they put me thru that period of grief
❤️true. but seriousness aside
This is why I always ask them to give their wife my number in case of emergencies.11 -
your_future_ex_wife wrote: »tinkerhellraiser wrote: »your_future_ex_wife wrote: »tinkerhellraiser wrote: »George_of_the_Jungle wrote: »Goes more than 24 hours without contact
I don't want someone who CAN'T go 24hrs without contact, especially early in a relationship. Yikes.
if i havent heard from someone in 24 hours i assume they are dead
and if it’s early in a relationship who’s going to tell you? I’ll be thinking they ghosted but really they were run over by a pickle truck.
and THEN if they message me after like 36 hours i will be soooooo mad they put me thru that period of grief
❤️true. but seriousness aside
This is why I always ask them to give their wife my number in case of emergencies.
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IDK, I guess I like my space. I don't need someone up my *kitten* 24/7.6
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tinkerhellraiser wrote: »George_of_the_Jungle wrote: »Goes more than 24 hours without contact
I don't want someone who CAN'T go 24hrs without contact, especially early in a relationship. Yikes.
if i havent heard from someone in 24 hours i assume they are dead
You say that like it's a bad thing.4 -
I once read that you should "Write like everyone you know is dead" and I feel like that's a lesson that could apply to life in general which is why I assume this is all a fragmented piece of twisted memory that I'm experiencing from beyond..the...grave..maybe?7
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tinkerhellraiser wrote: »tinkerhellraiser wrote: »George_of_the_Jungle wrote: »Goes more than 24 hours without contact
I don't want someone who CAN'T go 24hrs without contact, especially early in a relationship. Yikes.
if i havent heard from someone in 24 hours i assume they are dead
I prefer to think of it not as an ad hominem attack but merely a difference in ideologies. ❤️
It helps me sleep2 -
When she's not interested in going to the cat farm to check out this year's harvest4
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tinkerhellraiser wrote: »George_of_the_Jungle wrote: »Goes more than 24 hours without contact
I don't want someone who CAN'T go 24hrs without contact, especially early in a relationship. Yikes.
if i havent heard from someone in 24 hours i assume they are dead
You say that like it's a bad thing.
😂1 -
Reckoner68 wrote: »I once read that you should "Write like everyone you know is dead" and I feel like that's a lesson that could apply to life in general which is why I assume this is all a fragmented piece of twisted memory that I'm experiencing from beyond..the...grave..maybe?
I like you.3 -
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The one red flag I've figured out, is her expecting to be treated like a queen from the go. I'm a believer in equality. So expecting me to hold a door, or pay for the meal, ect. is a giant red flag for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't do these things. just, going into something, expecting the other person to owe you something, is a big no no for me.13
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mattig89ch wrote: »The one red flag I've figured out, is her expecting to be treated like a queen from the go. I'm a believer in equality. So expecting me to hold a door, or pay for the meal, ect. is a giant red flag for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't do these things. just, going into something, expecting the other person to owe you something, is a big no no for me.
I expect this.
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mattig89ch wrote: »The one red flag I've figured out, is her expecting to be treated like a queen from the go. I'm a believer in equality. So expecting me to hold a door, or pay for the meal, ect. is a giant red flag for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't do these things. just, going into something, expecting the other person to owe you something, is a big no no for me.
I expect this.
I was going to tag you because I think it’s cute we found the two least compatible MFPers. 😁4 -
your_future_ex_wife wrote: »mattig89ch wrote: »The one red flag I've figured out, is her expecting to be treated like a queen from the go. I'm a believer in equality. So expecting me to hold a door, or pay for the meal, ect. is a giant red flag for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't do these things. just, going into something, expecting the other person to owe you something, is a big no no for me.
I expect this.
I was going to tag you because I think it’s cute we found the two least compatible MFPers. 😁
You got that right! Lol
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mattig89ch wrote: »The one red flag I've figured out, is her expecting to be treated like a queen from the go. I'm a believer in equality. So expecting me to hold a door, or pay for the meal, ect. is a giant red flag for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't do these things. just, going into something, expecting the other person to owe you something, is a big no no for me.
I expect this.
Yep, is why I've tried to avoid flirting with you. Your cute, but we're def not compatible.
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mattig89ch wrote: »mattig89ch wrote: »The one red flag I've figured out, is her expecting to be treated like a queen from the go. I'm a believer in equality. So expecting me to hold a door, or pay for the meal, ect. is a giant red flag for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't do these things. just, going into something, expecting the other person to owe you something, is a big no no for me.
I expect this.
Yep, is why I've tried to avoid flirting with you. Your cute, but we're def not compatible.
Wow. Lol.
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mattig89ch wrote: »mattig89ch wrote: »The one red flag I've figured out, is her expecting to be treated like a queen from the go. I'm a believer in equality. So expecting me to hold a door, or pay for the meal, ect. is a giant red flag for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't do these things. just, going into something, expecting the other person to owe you something, is a big no no for me.
I expect this.
Yep, is why I've tried to avoid flirting with you. Your cute, but we're def not compatible.
I like this kind of sincerity. I wish more people were like this.11 -
mattig89ch wrote: »The one red flag I've figured out, is her expecting to be treated like a queen from the go. I'm a believer in equality. So expecting me to hold a door, or pay for the meal, ect. is a giant red flag for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't do these things. just, going into something, expecting the other person to owe you something, is a big no no for me.
For no reason except being a gentleman.
It’s good that you know what you want, but I think some things have kind of died and I wish they hadn’t.6 -
mattig89ch wrote: »The one red flag I've figured out, is her expecting to be treated like a queen from the go. I'm a believer in equality. So expecting me to hold a door, or pay for the meal, ect. is a giant red flag for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't do these things. just, going into something, expecting the other person to owe you something, is a big no no for me.
I expect this.
At the risk of sounding seriously old-fashioned and maybe even sexist, I do too.
I think for a lot of women it is just a basic expectation in dating especially in those earliest stages. Almost like a self-esteem thing, as sometimes it seems when you split everything or pick up the tab as a woman on Dates 1-3 you're opening the door for freeloading types of guys. I guess it may come across as feeling "owed" something to refuse to accept that sort of thing.
Just my opinion...but I think the red flag would be a woman who expects the man she is dating to pay for all of her things when shopping, buy expensive gifts, or pay the majority of bills when moving in together, serious stuff like that. By the time the couple is exclusive I think most women are more than willing to start paying for some things on dates and aren't gonna lose their minds if the guy doesn't open their door.
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If she goes on and on good or bad about an ex.....only to find out this "ex" was just an internet thing and she never even met him in real life.....11
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seltzermint555 wrote: »mattig89ch wrote: »The one red flag I've figured out, is her expecting to be treated like a queen from the go. I'm a believer in equality. So expecting me to hold a door, or pay for the meal, ect. is a giant red flag for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't do these things. just, going into something, expecting the other person to owe you something, is a big no no for me.
I expect this.
At the risk of sounding seriously old-fashioned and maybe even sexist, I do too.
I think for a lot of women it is just a basic expectation in dating especially in those earliest stages. Almost like a self-esteem thing, as sometimes it seems when you split everything or pick up the tab as a woman on Dates 1-3 you're opening the door for freeloading types of guys. Other women just refuse to accept that sort of thing.
Just my opinion...but I think the red flag would be a woman who expects the man she is dating to pay for all of her things when shopping, buy expensive gifts, or pay the majority of bills when moving in together, serious stuff like that.
I agree with everything you said. I’ve agreed to pay on dates before and they were sometimes offended. Never did they take me up on this offer until further in the relationship.
I’m kind of old fashion too. I think opening the door for me is sweet, paying for meal is what I’ve always know. I don’t expect it, but it’s nice.7 -
when she doesn't pay for my meal nor spots me a $20 and lets me borrow her car for a few minutes when i REALLY need it. like wow you know she's just selfish for real though.
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mattig89ch wrote: »The one red flag I've figured out, is her expecting to be treated like a queen from the go. I'm a believer in equality. So expecting me to hold a door, or pay for the meal, ect. is a giant red flag for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't do these things. just, going into something, expecting the other person to owe you something, is a big no no for me.
I don't see those things as something expected so much as chivalry. Equality is one thing. However, being a gentleman is another. If you ask me out for dinner, then yes you should pay for dinner. Vice versa; if I asked you out then the expense of the date belongs to me. Chivalry also goes both ways. That is equality.
If we are walking into a building together then it's chivalrous to hold the door and allow me to walk in first. I don't need to be treated like a queen and I certainly wouldn't think I am owed those things. However, I wouldn't likely continue seeing a person who doesn't do these things. And I certainly would not go on a 2nd date with someone who asked me out but then expected that I paid half of the expenses for the date.5 -
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