WHY do people CHEAT?

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Replies

  • Chef_Barbell
    Chef_Barbell Posts: 6,644 Member
    Derpes wrote: »
    This is an interesting thread; after all, MFP is the land of exchanging KIK usernames, complaining about your spouse on your wall, posting risqué photos despite being married, extreme thirst, and all sorts of other forms of cheating or pseudo-cheating.

    Touché!
  • J_NY_Z
    J_NY_Z Posts: 2,540 Member
    A clinical psychologist could take these 5 pages of this thread and write a great paper based on peoples experiences. The comments are fascinating to me. Really good honest stuff here.
  • shaf238
    shaf238 Posts: 4,021 Member
    I'm sure there's a million reasons why people cheat (none of them ok) but hey avoid being in a relationship and it's a non-issue :lol:
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    cee134 wrote: »
    Finishiitnow wrote: »
    According to an article I just read...
    We cheat to feel alive and to expand our sense of self desire....your thoughts???!!

    That seems extreme to me but I do cheat all the time. I have the Contra cheat codes memorized for life.

    ygfqdkgqwo4r.png

    My favorite post in this thread. :laugh:
  • rickigageby
    rickigageby Posts: 149 Member
    Maybe because they’re down on themselves and partner doesn’t show much attention and the new attention from another excites them.
    Maybe they’re together for the kids but actually don’t want to be together but they haven’t told each other!
    Could be a lot of reasons, not saying its right though.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    Reckoner68 wrote: »
    Every time I have cheated it has been to win

    If you're not first, you're last

    If you ain't cheatin'.... you ain't tryin'.
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    It's only cheating if you get caught. At least, that's how it is when you play Munchkin, Skip-bo or Uno. :laugh:
  • 777Gemma888
    777Gemma888 Posts: 9,578 Member
    glassyo wrote: »
    1sphere wrote: »
    LyndaBSS wrote: »
    I think cheating on your partner makes you the lowest form of pond scum on earth, especially when you use the old "it just happened" excuse.

    If you're not happy with your partner, put on your damn big girl or big guy panties and tell them. Either fix things or end them.

    For those guilty parties, remember this. If they'll cheat with you, they'll cheat on you.
    Me personally - I would never cheat on someone because I don't think it's a positive thing on my own spirit. I have a conscience and I wouldn't be able to lift that guilt.

    Although there are some women who may want to maintain a relationship with someone who has a low sex drive, and they probably would cheat in terms of a one night stand or something just for the thrill. isn't that called "swinging" or something? They probably do it behind their partners back so as not to hurt their partner if they don't agree with the idea of it. I don't think it makes them scum per se, it shows that they're needy and unfulfilled, so it can be a complicated matter.

    I also do NOT agree with doing things behind someones back... that' just me though.

    Swinging is totally different than cheating. So is an open relationship. Swingers and people in an open relationship know their partners are with other people. Cheating...they don't.

    Precisely. I am ALL ABOUT DISCLOSURE and safe coitus.
  • 777Gemma888
    777Gemma888 Posts: 9,578 Member
    NoHookUpZone wrote: »
    Open marriages aren't cheating. If at any time one or even both partners feel like it's cheating then that's not an open marriage.

    Crossing your mutually agreed boundaries is not an open marriage.

    Agree with this👆
  • 777Gemma888
    777Gemma888 Posts: 9,578 Member
    CanesGalactica wrote: »
    1sphere wrote: »
    CanesGalactica wrote: »
    I just have to say that so far, I am impressed with the maturity of the folks discussing this topic. Infidelity is a huge trigger for a lot of people and it is hard for those who have committed to it (at some point) to come forward and face judgment (in the form of disagrees, :laugh: ).
    The only negative thing for me is to lie and pretend to love. I just want people to be direct and real with me because I am a realist myself. Then I will have literally no anger. last thing I would want is for someone to lead me to assume that I'm loved.

    I do understand that. And that type of deceit is definitely wrong, imo. My personal experiences though? As the "cheater" in some of the situations, it was never about not loving or respecting the other person. A lot of times, it was because boundaries were never set, discussed or even broached or because I was pushed out (for whatever reason).. or in the case of one person, it was because he accused me of cheating (in which I hadn't), was possessive, went through my emails to cherry-pick what he wanted and then ended up being the one to cheat, leave me and move to another state on a whim.. all of this after he threw me through a window, used acid on my back (to clean hair dye stains) and sodomized me *in front of* his children.

    It also probably doesn't help that I don't see respect as something that involves my body. What I do with myself is my decision and is up to me and does not involve a secondary party. Some people, when they get in relationships, seem to take that as a carte blanche that they "own" my body, mind and soul simply because we're together. That is an emphatic NO from me. And I get that that is contentious for people. But my level of respect for a person or my love for that matter has absolutely NOTHING to do with my body... and honestly, to treat me (or another) as a possession simply because we're intimate is ANYTHING but respectful to me.

    But again, this is my opinion and I get that it might be considered skewed.
    Bolded, which latches onto your mention @Communication

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