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    The Bad Advice Thread

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    • Posts: 1,592 Member
      iMago wrote: »
      show previous quotes

      oh i can do this. here we go:

      "roses are red
      violets are blue
      your mother has flabby arms
      and you do too"

      Lol 😂

    • Posts: 2,116 Member
      iMago wrote: »
      show previous quotes

      oh i can do this. here we go:

      "roses are red
      violets are blue
      your mother has flabby arms
      and you do too"

      639q4925c6wq.gif
    • Posts: 9,563 Member
      Umm, 'bond touch'!?? I say "stalker much"

      ic7d0rra9sv3.png
    • Posts: 3,776 Member
      Miss_Chiev0us wrote: »
      When your girlfriend is acting up just tell her "less bitchen more kitchen". Women love it when you rhyme.

      I have a new catch phrase. Thank you.
    • Posts: 9,073 Member
      When she tells you she loves you to bits, always reply with "I love your bits too."
    • Posts: 4,855 Member
      Keep wearing your muzzles (Masks) even in bed at night to reduce your o2 levels and increase your carbon dioxide levels.
    • Posts: 8,714 Member
      get her pregnant this cuffing season and then she can't leave you next beach season

      s3sf54d5fdw1.jpeg
    • Posts: 523 Member
      Don't exercise to lose weight. That's not what exercise is for. Exercise is for health and fitness.
      If you're exercising to lose weight you're barking up the wrong tree.

      I cannot take credit for this golden nugget of sage advice. I've stolen it from some of the all-knowing gods of fitness found right here in these forums.
    • Posts: 14,320 Member
      iMago wrote: »
      don't have a ps5? want one?

      just start dating you a married girl who bought one for her husband. then you can share that too.
      Spoiler
      and delete all his saves every time you're done using it
      vn5g5qs79v92.gif

      Dream bigger.
      Spoiler
      Get her to buy you one too.
    • Posts: 9,073 Member
      If she added you on LinkedIn, she definitely wants you to add her on Insta and Snap.
    • Posts: 3,129 Member
      Make sure to point out everything she has in common with your ex, good or bad. She’s going to be so impressed with your good memory and strong analytical skills.
    • Posts: 2,116 Member
      iMago wrote: »
      if you want her to reply back faster, just start an argument.

      in reverse this would prolly get her left on read for two days
    • Posts: 20,506 Member
      iMago wrote: »
      "lower your voice" is a perfectly okay statement to make when she's already upset with you

      add:

      When you're wrong, and you always are..... and then when you raise your voice, you're even more wrong.
    • Posts: 8,714 Member
      wait until *juuuuuuust* after the blessing and the plates are served on thanksgiving, before you drop the classic "sure is a shame about the election isn't it guys"
    • Posts: 20,506 Member
      iMago wrote: »
      wait until *juuuuuuust* after the blessing and the plates are served on thanksgiving, before you drop the classic "sure is a shame about the election isn't it guys"

      I'll be substituting the words:

      "Donald Trump" for turkey.... "Hunter Biden" for mashed potatoes, "Covid Vaccine" instead of cranberry sauce.

      Pumpkin Pie will be renamed: "Maybe Rush Limbaugh was right all of this time after all ??"

      All we will then need is the traditional drunk uncle, attempting to pass dishes to the left, ( No, Uncle Charles... the other left ) and Thanksgiving Dinner will be a complete success.


      .... plus the Lions need to lose.
    • Posts: 523 Member
      Drink coffee at 6 pm to get pumped for your workout.
      Then do vigorous exercise for at least 30 minutes.

      You will get the best night's sleep.
    • Posts: 3,684 Member
      JessBbody wrote: »
      Drink coffee at 6 pm to get pumped for your workout.
      Then do vigorous exercise for at least 30 minutes.

      You will get the best night's sleep.

      I was about to say this is awful advice😂😂😂, then I remembered where I was 😬
    • Posts: 683 Member
      PlentyofProtein00 wrote: »
      show previous quotes

      I was about to say this is awful advice😂😂😂, then I remembered where I was 😬

      You somehow perfectly summarized my nightly endeavors..... :astonished:
    • Posts: 8,714 Member
      buy her some protein powder and a cheap shaker cup for christmas
    • Posts: 14,320 Member
      Marry for money.
    • Posts: 3,913 Member
      It’s okay to live with your stalker, he’ll change
    • Posts: 8,714 Member
      thanksgiving is over.

      that means now its okay to tell her how dry the turkey was.

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