Moment of realness
KickassAmazon76
Posts: 4,678 Member
Moment of realness... All these pics were taken today.
..
..
The first two might cause people to think I am super fit and have this awesome body to be coveted.
The next ones not so much.
I guarantee you that the first ones are flexed to hell and back and the second ones are just relaxed. Not pushing out at all, just... Relaxed.
I have put on weight. I have been eating my stress and it shows. Yes I have gained some muscle, but I have also gained fat.
AND THAT IS OK.
I DO have an awesome body. It lets me move heavy objects. It lets me play ball and be active. It moves me around. It supports me while I'm working and resting and having fun.
I want to take better care of it, and am working on that, but I also want people to realize...
What you see here is just a small side of me. The fit and strong side. You don't see the stresses and bad habits, you don't see the amazing and good habits. Please do not pass judgement ON ANYONE for the good or the bad based on a few pics or vids.
Its a superficial way to live if you determine a person's worth based on a social media platform.
....The first two might cause people to think I am super fit and have this awesome body to be coveted.
The next ones not so much.
I guarantee you that the first ones are flexed to hell and back and the second ones are just relaxed. Not pushing out at all, just... Relaxed.
I have put on weight. I have been eating my stress and it shows. Yes I have gained some muscle, but I have also gained fat.
AND THAT IS OK.
I DO have an awesome body. It lets me move heavy objects. It lets me play ball and be active. It moves me around. It supports me while I'm working and resting and having fun.
I want to take better care of it, and am working on that, but I also want people to realize...
What you see here is just a small side of me. The fit and strong side. You don't see the stresses and bad habits, you don't see the amazing and good habits. Please do not pass judgement ON ANYONE for the good or the bad based on a few pics or vids.
Its a superficial way to live if you determine a person's worth based on a social media platform.
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p.s if you're on a browser... I'm so sorry the pics are so big! eep. will try to see if I can resize!!
eta: fixed it.
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Looking fantastic!3
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This is awesome on so many levels, and OP is so generous to share.
For those of you who don’t know @KickassAmazon76 she really is a kick *kitten* lady.
You’ll find many of her lifting adventures here:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10817729/gift-us-your-lifts-or-other-achievements/p102
I hope people, particularly ladies, read this and look at her videos to see what a real lady of power and strength looks like, versus a posed and digitally altered Instagram version of one.
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springlering62 wrote: »This is awesome on so many levels, and OP is so generous to share.
For those of you who don’t know @KickassAmazon76 she really is a kick *kitten* lady.
You’ll find many of her lifting adventures here:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10817729/gift-us-your-lifts-or-other-achievements/p102
I hope people, particularly ladies, read this and look at her videos to see what a real lady of power and strength looks like, versus a posed and digitally altered Instagram version of one.
You legit made me cry. Thank you so much for this. I appreciate it more than you know.
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Real is beautiful you go grrrl! 3
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Thank you for your realness and complete honesty in sharing this post! I think a lot of people need to hear this. I think you look awesome either way and even though you are flexing, your abs are still envious.
Another thing I have to often remind myself when looking at others' photos or weightlifting stats is to not compare myself or my journey to theirs, especially now that I'm more focused on body recomp and leaning out. I get frustrated when I see how "little" I seem to be lifting, especially lower body lifts, and it makes me feel weak. I have to remind myself, though, that our bodies are all different, including how much muscle tone we innately have and how quickly we respond to strength training.8 -
Speakeasy76 wrote: »Thank you for your realness and complete honesty in sharing this post! I think a lot of people need to hear this. I think you look awesome either way and even though you are flexing, your abs are still envious.
Another thing I have to often remind myself when looking at others' photos or weightlifting stats is to not compare myself or my journey to theirs, especially now that I'm more focused on body recomp and leaning out. I get frustrated when I see how "little" I seem to be lifting, especially lower body lifts, and it makes me feel weak. I have to remind myself, though, that our bodies are all different, including how much muscle tone we innately have and how quickly we respond to strength training.
Thank you.
I agree with you entirely. I am on the fitness side of TikTok and while it is inspiring to see so many people lifting insane weights with apparent ease, it can also be disheartening because it does make me feel somewhat inadequate. It's at that point that I remind myself that I am competing only with myself, and even then, it's not always a competition.
Heavy lifting means the weight is heavy for you and you're lifting enough weight that you're struggling to get out that last rep. In my opinion, it matters nothing if that weight is 10 or 100 lbs.
All we can do is our best. 9 -
You are awesome in so many ways Sandy ... I love that you are real and upfront ... I am happy to call you a friend 1
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Megan_smartiepants1970 wrote: »You are awesome in so many ways Sandy ... I love that you are real and upfront ... I am happy to call you a friend
❤️❤️❤️ Thank you so much! I feel the same way about you!1 -
You are definitely a Kickass kinda gal!! Strong inside, outside and all around the side!! You look great, you look real, and omg you don't look airbrushed. << Best thing of all! You are a strong, hard-working, courageous woman who women should strive to be like and not the woman on pg. 57 of Penthouse who is airbrushed and made up to the maximum.
One important thing that your body does well is love. And nobody should ever forget that they all have that within themselves. And there are so many people, whether in your family, circle of friends, strangers, who need that love given to them by you, myself, every person who posts here. Sometimes we dwell too much on every ounce we take in, grams of protein, how many steps we take every day but forget what truly matters in life. Yes, of course our health does, that's a given, but life is also so much more.
Just curious, was something said that started this post idea or just some personal cleansing? Because I love it!! Maybe we'll hear from others as well.1 -
You are definitely a Kickass kinda gal!! Strong inside, outside and all around the side!! You look great, you look real, and omg you don't look airbrushed. << Best thing of all! You are a strong, hard-working, courageous woman who women should strive to be like and not the woman on pg. 57 of Penthouse who is airbrushed and made up to the maximum.
One important thing that your body does well is love. And nobody should ever forget that they all have that within themselves. And there are so many people, whether in your family, circle of friends, strangers, who need that love given to them by you, myself, every person who posts here. Sometimes we dwell too much on every ounce we take in, grams of protein, how many steps we take every day but forget what truly matters in life. Yes, of course our health does, that's a given, but life is also so much more.
Just curious, was something said that started this post idea or just some personal cleansing? Because I love it!! Maybe we'll hear from others as well.
Firstly.. thank you so much. You really are such a sweet and kind hearted individual and I just adore you.
As for what triggered it... to be totally honest... It was the fact that I have been hating seeing over 190 on my scale for weeks now, and not liking the way I look in the mirror, or how I feel when I'm relaxed... combined with the fact that I have some random internet dude telling me I have "his dream body" (kinda eww) and that my body is "perfection", when he does not see the whole picture - only a narrow view. That sent me into a bit of a depression because I have a hard time reconciling the person I see/ feel like I am when I workout with the person I feel the the rest of the day.
When he said that, my first thought was to argue with him because he doesn't see me at rest, or in a housecoat with ripped jeans, hair that hasn't been brushed, and bags under my eyes. That got me thinking about how many other people have this image of me that I feel is so not realistic. Yes the vids of me lifting are real, but they're not enough to reflect who I really am, or who I am on the inside.
Then I started thinking about how I look at some of these people on tiktok and on here who are so strong and look amazing and look like they've figured it out, and wondered if they feel just as effed up as I do on the inside.
So, I figured I'd share this and get some thoughts out there. 14 -
Speakeasy76 wrote: »Another thing I have to often remind myself when looking at others' photos or weightlifting stats is to not compare myself or my journey to theirs, especially now that I'm more focused on body recomp and leaning out. I get frustrated when I see how "little" I seem to be lifting, especially lower body lifts, and it makes me feel weak. I have to remind myself, though, that our bodies are all different, including how much muscle tone we innately have and how quickly we respond to strength training.
My experience when recomping (without knowing that's what I was doing) was that I got leaner quite quickly, while I was lifting less heavy weights. Since I work out at home, alone, I am very very cautious about potential for injury and progress slooooowly.KickassAmazon76 wrote: »Then I started thinking about how I look at some of these people on tiktok and on here who are so strong and look amazing and look like they've figured it out, and wondered if they feel just as effed up as I do on the inside.
I would say yes, they probably do. What's that saying? Don't judge your own insides by another person's outsides. Especially not someone who took 20 or 30 photos or videos that were then altered/filtered/edited before they were deemed worthy of sharing publicly.
Strength of character beats showy muscles any day. And you've got both. 3 -
@KickassAmazon76
You might like the below.... it touches on some of the same issues....
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10689837/does-this-uterus-make-my-stomach-look-fat/p1
As for the other comments, I can certainly agree that viewing a social media platform is just showing the side of a person that they want to show. And often, many only show the good, and hide the bad.
As for the rest... life happens. Being human we are all way more imperfect that many others might think. Owning that is a great thing, because if you aren't honest with yourself you can't set priorities in life. And we never know what other people deal with unless they mention it, and many have a lot on their plate.
Sometimes we have to prioritize the inner struggles before we worry about the skin we live in, and that's ok.
Being imperfect = human
Owning and pointing out imperfections to set an example = Why did they get rid of the awesome button?
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Speakeasy76 wrote: »Another thing I have to often remind myself when looking at others' photos or weightlifting stats is to not compare myself or my journey to theirs, especially now that I'm more focused on body recomp and leaning out. I get frustrated when I see how "little" I seem to be lifting, especially lower body lifts, and it makes me feel weak. I have to remind myself, though, that our bodies are all different, including how much muscle tone we innately have and how quickly we respond to strength training.
My experience when recomping (without knowing that's what I was doing) was that I got leaner quite quickly, while I was lifting less heavy weights. Since I work out at home, alone, I am very very cautious about potential for injury and progress slooooowly.KickassAmazon76 wrote: »Then I started thinking about how I look at some of these people on tiktok and on here who are so strong and look amazing and look like they've figured it out, and wondered if they feel just as effed up as I do on the inside.
I would say yes, they probably do. What's that saying? Don't judge your own insides by another person's outsides. Especially not someone who took 20 or 30 photos or videos that were then altered/filtered/edited before they were deemed worthy of sharing publicly.
Strength of character beats showy muscles any day. And you've got both.
Love this, and thank you so much! ❤️robertw486 wrote: »@KickassAmazon76
You might like the below.... it touches on some of the same issues....
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10689837/does-this-uterus-make-my-stomach-look-fat/p1
As for the other comments, I can certainly agree that viewing a social media platform is just showing the side of a person that they want to show. And often, many only show the good, and hide the bad.
As for the rest... life happens. Being human we are all way more imperfect that many others might think. Owning that is a great thing, because if you aren't honest with yourself you can't set priorities in life. And we never know what other people deal with unless they mention it, and many have a lot on their plate.
Sometimes we have to prioritize the inner struggles before we worry about the skin we live in, and that's ok.
Being imperfect = human
Owning and pointing out imperfections to set an example = Why did they get rid of the awesome button?
Thank you! I am familiar with that thread and yes, some of the abdominal distension is definitely physiological (I'm working through some side effects from a med I'm on).
It would be way easier to only show the good side, but then I kind of feel like a fraud. I want to encourage people, and sometimes apparent perfection can do the opposite. (Note: I'm not saying I appear perfect - far from it!)
With all that's gone on in my life lately (there's been a lot), I did allow myself a bit of grace in terms of what I ate, and sometimes when the family is in crisis... It just makes emotional sense to save the stress of dinner prep and cleanup and go fast food. It adds up though. Some here and there is fine, but it became a bit of a problem.
I'm slowly trying to steer myself back into the meal prep and logging zone... But I'm not quite there yet. 😊 I know what I need to do to lose the extra, I just need to choose to do it.
Thank you for your kind words. They mean a lot to me. 😊5 -
All props to @KickassAmazon76 for bravely sharing this.
It’s empowering to see other strong women…:dare I say?…..reveling in their imperfections. No, honoring them, as we all should honor and respect our own bodies.
With her permission, I’m adding to this thread, in hopes other ladies will share (to your comfort level) your natural, unenhanced, unaltered tasteful photos and GIFs.
Sometimes, seeing other women helps us heave that secret sigh of relief that we’re overthinking (and over-criticizing) expectations for our own bodies.
Like the old song says: Love the One You're With.
That’d be you.
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“Batwings”
Batwings were my anathema, until @AnnPT77 posted something that blew my mind, and made me completely rethink them.
Everyone has bingo wings, and most of us see them as a flaw or fault.
They’re not. They’re just a normal part of your body.
See how when my arm is straight out and relaxed, my wings wobble? Same if I casually bend my arm up.
But if I flex, those so-called wings are taut. There’s no give, no wobble.
Your “wings” there for a reason. They’re simply extra skin to cover your muscles.
Do my wings clap when I run or move vigorously? Hell yeah!!!!! Does it bother me any more? Pfffffft. I don’t even think about them now.
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springlering62 wrote: »“Batwings”
Batwings were my anathema, until @AnnPT77 posted something that blew my mind, and made me completely rethink them.
Everyone has bingo wings, and most of us see them as a flaw or fault.
They’re not. They’re just a normal part of your body.
See how when my arm is straight out and relaxed, my wings wobble? Same if I casually bend my arm up.
But if I flex, those so-called wings are taut. There’s no give, no wobble.
Your “wings” there for a reason. They’re simply extra skin to cover your muscles.
Do my wings clap when I run or move vigorously? Hell yeah!!!!! Does it bother me any more? Pfffffft. I don’t even think about them now.
You've just been added to my list of authentic and real lovely people! Kudos to all who share the real. 7 -
I think the gif is a good idea and here's mine... Flexed. Relaxed. This is me. I'm the same person. I need to remind myself that if I feel great when I'm flexed, I am JUST AS GREAT when I am relaxed.
Too often my self esteem revolves around how I feel. That needs to stop. ❤️
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springlering62 wrote: »“Batwings”
Batwings were my anathema, until @AnnPT77 posted something that blew my mind, and made me completely rethink them.
Everyone has bingo wings, and most of us see them as a flaw or fault.
They’re not. They’re just a normal part of your body.
See how when my arm is straight out and relaxed, my wings wobble? Same if I casually bend my arm up.
But if I flex, those so-called wings are taut. There’s no give, no wobble.
Your “wings” there for a reason. They’re simply extra skin to cover your muscles.
Do my wings clap when I run or move vigorously? Hell yeah!!!!! Does it bother me any more? Pfffffft. I don’t even think about them now.
👏👏👏
Yes, yes, yes. There are waaayyy too many women hating on their upper arms because of "batwings" (a.k.a. bingo wings, arm flaps, chicken wings, . . . .), when at least a significant part of what's distressing them is nice, useful triceps muscles. I'm not saying there's never any fat or optional loose skin, but every time I've led a woman in my real life through the steps to feel the triceps, they were misidentifying their triceps muscles as fat or loose skin.
Thank you for this gif illustration, @springlering62 - much clearer than my words-y explanations.
Folks, with your opposite hand, grab the loose mass when you're holding your arm in the relaxed position at the start of her example. Get your fingertips as close to the bone as you feel flappy stuff below that bone. Then flex your arm hard, like a bodybuilder: Upper arm above shoulder to around 45 degrees, fist tight and curled toward forearm, forearm pulled down near the upper arm so that hard fist approaches your ear. Almost certainly, you'll feel some of that flappy stuff tighten up in your opposite hand's grip, when you do that. Anything that tightens up is nice triceps muscles. They're useful: Strive to love them.
The instructor in my women's strength training class, years back, showed us this. (He's a guy. An insightful, knowledgeable one.)
Other muscles, in the right position, can do a similar thing. If you see your upper thighs look lots wider when you sit on a chair? A lot of that is relaxed hamstring muscles (back of upper leg) being squished out horizontally by the chair seat. It's not all fat or loose skin. These effects can happen for strong, fit, lean people, too - men and women both.
Muscles. Love 'em . . . please!8 -
Your Belly Roll May Be Bad Posture
As several posters regularly comment, what you perceive as a belly roll may be bad posture.
Many of the photos people post on MFP, worrying about their bellies are simply people slouching or relaxing. Slouching emphasizes bellies. You’d think we’d figure that out, but we have this stupid idea we should have abs of steel 24/7.
1.) relaxed and slumping. Hello, pooch!
2.) Standing up straighter helps bring the beliy in
3.) sucking it in (I use @ninerbuff ’s super effective “stomach vacuum”, which I hope he’ll explain further here. And no, you can’t buy a stomach vacuum off HSN- although I wouldn’t be surprised if some shyster had tried.)9 -
The Extra Skin Olympics aka Floam Is My Superpower
Warning: You May Not Be Able to Un-See This
@callsitlikeiseeit wisely said yesterday that leggings hide a multitude of sins. Amen, sister, amen.
Extra skin. Not much you can do about it except pray it goes away with time (much of it will), have it surgically removed (ouchy and yucky) or disguise it.
At the risk of sounding vain, you’d probably see me in the street and think I have no issues with extra skin.
Guess again. In spite of reasonably careful nutrition, and regular exercise, including weightlifting, it persists.
To give you an idea, I am 5’7”, SW was 222+, CW averages 133.
Sorry for the resting *kitten* face, but it’s either that or laugh uncontrollably while videoing this:
If you have extra skin, appreciate it for the battle scars it is. I’d much rather have this tucked in my elastic than still be waddling around with it in its original bulk.19 -
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springlering62 wrote: »The Extra Skin Olympics aka Floam Is My Superpower
Warning: You May Not Be Able to Un-See This
@callsitlikeiseeit wisely said yesterday that leggings hide a multitude of sins. Amen, sister, amen.
Extra skin. Not much you can do about it except pray it goes away with time (much of it will), have it surgically removed (ouchy and yucky) or disguise it.
At the risk of sounding vain, you’d probably see me in the street and think I have no issues with extra skin.
Guess again. In spite of reasonably careful nutrition, and regular exercise, including weightlifting, it persists.
To give you an idea, I am 5’7”, SW was 222+, CW averages 133.
Sorry for the resting *kitten* face, but it’s either that or laugh uncontrollably while videoing this:
If you have extra skin, appreciate it for the battle scars it is. I’d much rather have this tucked in my elastic than still be waddling around with it in its original bulk.
You are incredible in so many ways.
thank you for sharing these!!!
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This thread probably needs making sticky for those last few posts from @springlering62 alone.5
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I agree with that comment about sticky-ing (if you nominate it in https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10260479/nominate-posts-for-announcement-status-stickies#latest, that's how that happens, though it takes a while.)
Great contributions from OP and others - such a good thread! Thanks for starting it, @KickassAmazon76: The world need such Real Realness.
@springlering62, I'd also encourage you to add these GIFs in your success/progress thread that has other honest bits about your story - I think it was this one:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10763291/my-turn-to-overshare-my-adventure
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springlering62 wrote: »“Batwings”
Batwings were my anathema, until @AnnPT77 posted something that blew my mind, and made me completely rethink them.
Everyone has bingo wings, and most of us see them as a flaw or fault.
They’re not. They’re just a normal part of your body.
See how when my arm is straight out and relaxed, my wings wobble? Same if I casually bend my arm up.
But if I flex, those so-called wings are taut. There’s no give, no wobble.
Your “wings” there for a reason. They’re simply extra skin to cover your muscles.
Do my wings clap when I run or move vigorously? Hell yeah!!!!! Does it bother me any more? Pfffffft. I don’t even think about them now.
You've just been added to my list of authentic and real lovely people!
Mine too! Oh wait... she was already on that list...2 -
OK, moments of realness for sure here.
Over the past three years of weight loss (90’ish lbs) and maintenance, my body has done the absolute strangest and most unexpected things. I’ve come to refer to these moments as “Rearranging the Furniture” for the simple reason, it’s still all the same parts, they just moved somewhere else.
The first was the horrifying morning when I crawled out of bed and my butt bounced. Literally bounced. It felt like I had a bouncy castle attached to my *kitten*. Not an exaggeration- I felt it wobble as soon as I stood up, and immediately knew something was “wrong”.
I ran to the mirror and cried. Overnight, my butt had turned to jello and was hanging like balloon curtains over my hamstrings. Touching it was like touching a water balloon. I crammed it into leggings and carried on. What else could I do?
A week later, it tightened, lifted, and had a totally different shape. A kinda pleasant one, TBH.
One morning, looking in the mirror, I realized loose skin under my arms (I loath the term “bingo wings”) was gone (except for what was supposed to be there - see above). That was a good morning!
Then there was the time I discovered my thighs were dimpled and dappled with horrible, deeply pitted cellulite. I know wasn’t there when I’d dressed in the morning. I wasn’t happy, but by then I knew enough to tell myself “deep breath and let’s see where this takes us”.
Whatever happened there flushed itself out in a matter of days, leaving behind not only slimmer smoother thighs, but some welcome muscle definition.
It’s been like this over and over throughout weight loss and even in to maintenance. The changes don’t always correlate to weight loss.
This is on my mind because, nearly a year into maintenance, my stomach has not only gone soft and squishy, my “apron” (and those of you that have one know exactly what I mean) is back as of today.
Well, hello there, old buddy!!!
My stomach and apron are hanging over my waistband. Several rolls have appeared on my belly. My armpits are billowing over my sports bra.
Panic checklist:
1.) have I put on weight? No.
2.) Am I still exercising? Yes
3.) have I changed my diet? A bit of tinkering with macros but not enough to cause this
4.) retaining water? If anything, a bit dehydrated from being on my feet all weekend helping with a community event
5.)Do clothes still fit? Yes and in fact have gotten looser in the past couple months, even with steady weight in maintenance.
Am I worried? Not for the time being. I’ll give it a few weeks and see what happens.
I just find it fascinating that not only does your body do such wierd, even comical things, but it continues to do them.
I guess in reverse, we don’t realize the long term effects that packing the weight on had on us. I guess the unpacking process is a process in and of itself.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aedB7x6cjjQ
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