Less Alcohol ~ SEPTEMBER 2021 ~ One Day At A Time

~THIS IS A MONTHLY CONTINUING THREAD THAT HAS BEEN ACTIVE SINCE AS FAR BACK AS 2017.
ALL WELCOME ~

Do you want to drink LESS?

Do it because it's a lovely thing to do for yourself!

I bet that thinking a day off is a sort of punishment and hasn't been working.

Be kind to the person you will wake up as.

Join us in drinking LESS (whatever that means for you) one day at a time, as we continue to support and learn from each other.

▪MFP LESS ALCOHOL ONE DAY AT A TIME RESOURCE & GENERAL INFORMATION LIST▪

USING THIS THREAD:
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•Join us at any time - this is a day to day challenge.
•Set your own goal - this thread is about drinking less and you decide what that means to you.
•There are no scheduled check-ins - post as often or as little as you want or need.
•AF is an acronym for Alcohol Free. For others commonly used on this site see - https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1069278/acronyms-and-terms-for-new-mfp-members-v-6/p1
•To follow this thread easily, bookmark it by clicking on the star at the top right of this thread.
•Remember that we are here for you and care about you. Check in with us when you have time and let us know what you need!

TIPS & OBSERVATIONS FROM OUR USERS:
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•Getting Started or Starting Over - The Early Days
•Some people find it easier to set small attainable goals at the beginning to help boost confidence.
•If you have been drinking daily the first days will be some of the hardest and drinking again will feel like a cure but it delays the relief that only time can provide.
•There will always be a reason to delay the start/restart of your journey.
•For those ready to commit to being alcohol-free permanently, the videos on YouTube by Craig Beck will help. He also has a program you can join.
•You may experience mood swings and anxiety during your first two weeks. It is suggested you try and focus on the benefits of your goal.
•Cravings are said to last only 6 minutes, so find something to distract you like arming yourself with alternatives: tea, mock-tails, activities, etc.
•You may find that filling the time you drink with other activities like exercise or hobbies can be a helpful distraction.
•If you find them tempting try and avoid events/outings that will have drinking for a time.
•Don't let pride or shame keep you from asking for the help you need.
•Sometimes talking it out or posting your thoughts/feelings/struggles may help you work things out for yourself.
•It is okay that you don't always have all the answers.
•Some days will be easier than others.
•You may have initial/increased sugar cravings.
•You should never take a day that you have lived up to your goals for granted.
•Celebrate the smaller victories too. Less alcohol is still less alcohol even if your goal was zero at that moment.
•Once you begin sticking to your goals for one day to many days you should believe you are capable of the same and more because you are.
•Failure is not giving in and drinking. Failure is to stop trying to accomplish your goals.
•Annie Grace (This Naked Mind author) has a free program on her website (https://www.alcoholexperiment.com/) called the 30 day experiment which can be joined anonymously.

Life with Less Alcohol:
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•It can be helpful to educate yourself with books and web research (Some suggested books and links listed below).
•There is no benefit to comparing yourself to others because this is a personal journey.
•You may often feel conflicted. You will know that there are numerous real benefits to sticking to your goal while at the same time think that alcohol is an important part of stress relief, relaxation, celebration, etc.
•You may feel punished by not drinking or drinking less but that feeling usually fades with time.
•Sometimes drinking less or quitting will strain friendships that centered around alcohol.
•Having a list of reasons to stick to your goals handy for yourself can be helpful. Some lists have included remembering how bad it feels to have a hangover, excess/unwanted calories, having a racing heart during the night, sleeplessness, anxiety, and depression.
•It is a good idea to have a plan for how you might deal with various tempting scenarios before engaging in a social situation.
•Self-Reflection is an important part of the journey. Once we figure out why we drink we can hopefully use that information to form new habits and make better and more mindful decisions.
•Sometimes doing something nice for yourself like a little reward for a success makes the journey easier.
•You will see many helpful suggestions and ideas that work for some people. However, finding what tactics work for you may involve some trial and error.
•It is not uncommon for certain activities that were once combined with alcohol to trigger temptation. Many have said that outdoor activities in warmer weather made alcohol very tempting.
•Many that have spent time with no alcohol after drinking again realized that it doesn't enhance experiences like they once believed it did. Some have said they no longer like the taste.
•Don't forget how sticking to your goal has made your life better and remember it to motivate you again if you fall off your path.
•If you begin drinking daily again whether planned like a vacation or unplanned you may once again face a struggle to get it under control.
•For some people it is easier to not drink than it is to moderate drinking. Others have found moderating impossible.

Reported Benefits of Less or No Drinking: (Results may be incremental, and/or they may vary)
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•Improved sleep after 2,4,7,10,& 60 days
•Improved skin/complexion after 10 days
•Improved ease in weight loss. Not only from the savings of alcohol calories but some report making poor food choices after drinking.
•Increased energy after as few as 2 days
•Increase in other fun activities. Some have found that daily drinking became their main recreational activity and their world was decreased in size.
•Increased productivity
•Reduction of high blood pressure
•Lower resting heart rate
•Less Acid Re-flux
•Significant financial savings
•More creativity
•More productivity
•Better relationships with family

When Alcohol Is Used for Avoidance:
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•We drink to ease the stress of the working day, to avoid it.
•We drink to avoid anxiety in social situations.
•We drink to avoid making decisions about not drinking.
•The Takeaway on Avoidance, our problems don't go away if we avoid them. We need to learn to face them.
•Having a clear head makes our problems seem much smaller.
•Having a clear head makes problems easier to solve.

How to Be Kind to "Tomorrow You":
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•Instead of lumbering with guilt, headaches, and poor nutrition hangovers in the morning, Think of think how nice it would be not to feel that way tomorrow.
•Worry about "me" and don't let "tomorrow Me" feel awful.
•Instead of thinking alcohol is something nice to have *now*, think of *NOT drinking* as something nice we can do for the person we are when we awaken in the morning.
•Do you bank calories for a festive occasion? (Handy tactic) We can bank a good mood for when we wake up.
•We need to have sympathy for "Tomorrow You" and be kind to her/him.
•Don't look at a day without alcohol as a punishment for being bad or having no willpower.
•Not drinking is a lovely, sympathetic gesture towards the person we are now, and whom we will wake up as.
•You’d be kind to a stranger. Be kind to "Tomorrow You".

LINKS:
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•Mydrinkaware:
https://www.mydrinkaware.co.uk

•A Sharing Site for Women:
http://www.drinkingdiaries.com/about/

•General Information/Blog Sites:
https://thesoberschool.com/
http://www.hipsobriety.com/
https://joinclubsoda.co.uk/
https://thisnakedmind.com/blog/
https://alcoholmastery.com/blog/

•Sobriety Blog:
http://mummywasasecretdrinker.blogspot.com/

•The Thirty Day Experiment:
https://www.alcoholexperiment.com/

•Ten Things That Helped Me Quit Booze:
https://unpickledblog.com/2017/01/04/replacement-behaviours-ten-things-that-helped-me-kick-booze/?wref=tp

•The Neuroscience Behind How We Make Decisions:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-athletes-way/201505/the-neuroscience-making-decision

•Summary of Book on Addiction:
https://drgabormate.com/book/in-the-realm-of-hungry-ghosts/

•Article on the Difference Between Being an Alcoholic and Really Liking to Drink:
https://www.self.com/story/alcoholic-or-just-really-like-to-drink

•To the Mom questioning her drinking habits:
http://www.scarymommy.com/questioning-drinking-habits/

•Guided Meditations:
http://marc.ucla.edu/mindful-meditations

ALTERNATIVE DRINKS:
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•Overnight Cold Brew Iced Tea:
https://www.splendidtable.org/story/you-can-cold-brew-iced-tea-while-you-sleep

•Mocktail Recipes:
https://www.allrecipes.com/recipes/1822/drinks/mocktails/
https://www.foodandwine.com/cocktails-spirits/mocktails
https://www.townandcountrymag.com/leisure/drinks/how-to/g785/best-mocktail-recipes/

APPS:
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•Daybreak iOS link. A Deakin University study of hundreds of health apps found that Daybreak is one of only four that have proven effective and provide quality assistance.
•Dry Days by AlcoChange iOS is for those who want to cut down or cut out the booze throughout the year, while seeing the impact it has on your health and wallet.
•nomo - Sobriety Clocks iOS - In addition to an alcohol clock and monetary savings this app lets you check in and do a sobriety exercise if you're tempted, and connect with accountability partners.
•Sobriety Counter - Stop Drinking (Sobriety Counter - EasyQuit pro version) Android- Provides health stats, money saved, games to distract you, motivational tips, and several other features

BOOKS:
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•The Naked Mind by Annie Grace
•Alcohol Lied to Me by Craig Beck
•Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey
•The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray
•The Liars Club, Cherry, and Lit by Mary Karr (3 different publications)
•Kick the Drink...Easily by Jason Vale
•Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp
•Being Sober: A Step-by-Step Guide to Getting To, Getting Through, and Living in Recovery by Harry Haroutunian
•The Easy, Illustrated Way to Quit Drinking by Alan Carr
•Alcohol Explained by William Porter


Credit and thanks to the MFP Less Alcohol One Day at a Time participants
For their willingness to share their insights and resourcefulness in finding this information
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Replies

  • CateAussie
    CateAussie Posts: 21 Member
    What a great introduction, Miss May. I have just made a commitment to myself to have at least 2 AF days a week. I enjoyed the challenge of Dry July & did it without much effort, but then settled back into a couple of glasses of wine at the end of the day most days in August. I'm ready to drink less. I will check out some of the resources listed above. That is a great list, thank you!
  • MissMay
    MissMay Posts: 3,750 Member
    edited September 2021
    Welcome to September everyone.

    There has been such a wonderful continued support system from all our long time, recent and brand new contributors. It goes to show us we are NOT alone with our need to reduce alcohol in our lives, for a variety of reasons. I appreciate all the time you put into sharing your own experinces and encouragement to others.

    We also have September birthdays coming up ( @dawnbgethealthy ) like I would ever forget! No way!

    Right out of the gate I am putting up my standard drinks poster as a visual aid to see what 1 drink looks like. ( NO it is not a filled to the rim, over flowing glass.....LOL)

    dtyca9d7c6ho.jpg
  • globalhiker
    globalhiker Posts: 1,691 Member
    September goals:

    -track drinks daily
    -track AF days get in at least 22 days AF
  • Lilylady3k
    Lilylady3k Posts: 4,008 Member
    https://altamirarecovery.com/what-do-i-do-if-my-husband-cant-stop-drinking/

    @Lilylady3k - I just googled "how to help your spouse stop drinking" and this site popped up. I don't know this program but read through the section about enabling and it made logical sense.

    My spouse slid back after making such good progress and I am starting to follow him (feels like Monkey-see, Monkey-do). This helps me realize I need to follow my own path, achieve success, and let him see that so he can gain motivation to follow and do the same.

    @globalhiker - Thank you for this info and understanding. I totally agree ... monkey-see monkey-do ... I grabbed a wine glass this evening out of habit but limiting it to one (hopefully).
  • Lilylady3k
    Lilylady3k Posts: 4,008 Member
    dethstar77 wrote: »
    Its been awhile since I posted. When I started posting in this group, I was going through some personal issues and some of you might remember. Alcohol was a major cause for the issues between me and the wife, it got bad and we were in kind of separation for the past 6 month albeit under the same roof due to kids and financial reasons and the D word even came up. However, I quit my daily drinking back in March and even did a 75 day stint without alcohol. Started healthy habits - working out, running (ran my first 10K) and had the support of a lot of friends. Got so much inspiration from this group. However, this past week she said she is ready to give us another chance. She is the love of my life, high school sweetheart, my soulmate and I nearly lost her. Anyway plan on continuing with the reduced alcohol and limit the number of drinks when I do drink and continue to be inspired all of y'all in here. Thank you for the support and inspiration as we start on this road to recovery with a positive first step.

    @dethstar77 - Really appreciate you opening up and sharing your journey. I was wondering if we would hear from you this month ... and here you are. Good luck with renewing your relationship. DH & I were just talking the other day about how long we've been married (38 years) and the little ups and downs but how great it is to have someone to share our journey. ((HUGS))
    You've been an inspiration on the drinking front!!! And on a glimpse that my own DH will find his path to less alcohol when he is ready too.
  • lmlmrn
    lmlmrn Posts: 788 Member
    @MissMay I am so sorry to hear about your baby, my prayers go out to you for comfort

    AF last night so that is 2/2 AF day. I plan to be AF for the next 4 days at least. Todays schedule not bad 2pm-10:30pm approx. But Sat 11am-10:30pm and Sun 11am to 9:30 pm...going to be some long nights.

    Do any of you have any tricks up your sleeves to relieve that tickle in the back of your throat when you lay down to go to sleep? I have tried throat lozenges, humidifier, breathing in steaming salt water before bed. It usually starts after I have been prone for about 20 minutes and will keep up all night. If I resist the urge to cough then my nose gets stuff/runny and my eyes water.