WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR AUGUST 2024

LisaInArkansas

Michele - No... open shelf. This is the kitchen plan - I lit up the two pantry shelves in yellow. This way, no matter what you need while you're cooking, it's in arm's reach, and you honestly can't see it at all unless you're standing right at the stove, so the chaos is contained. Doors would make it very hard to maneuver unless they slid side to side, which might be a later option. We don't keep it in the pantry unless we're going to use it, so not too much kitchen schmutz to this point.

I would like to swap the refrigerator door so the hinge is at the left edge, rather than the right like it is now, when you're facing the refrigerator. Not worth doing when you're used to opening it the other way for years. If we replace it down the road, I'll get it set to open the other way.

Barbie - The whole "chronic illness" thing has its own weight somehow, totally outside of its symptoms, which are bad enough. It is a quality of attention to your self and how you feel, a sort of alertness that you have to learn in order to stay as healthy as you can within that world. Adds one more level of fatigue to the list, unfortunately. Many hugs for you and your Jake, you both deal with it so well in your own specific ways. I told Corey, and meant it with all my heart, that I would rather be the one that's ill than the one that's standing there feeling helpless. At least I KNOW how I feel. He can only surmise unless I tell him in excruciating detail, which I try to avoid. Ah well. Some days you're the windshield, some days you're the bug. 🤣🪰😁

Onward, upward...
Love,
Lisa in AR

PS - One of my favorite authors, Anne Lamott, said in a recent article: "They’ve seen over and over that most things will be okay as long as we’re tender with each other." I think this group, more than any other I've been part of, is tender with each other.

Love y'all,
Lisa

pipcd34

585585

GodMomKim

Hi Gals,

This is a vent…. Nothing any of you can do about it, but just me blowing off some steam. And it is about Medicare, I do not consider that pollical but if you do please don’t open the spoiler.

My 65 birthday was one year ago and I thought I was proactive I did all the “right” things to sign up for medicare without social security, my goal is to work until I am 70 to maximize the monthly amount from Social Security. All seemed to go fine, but I knew I would need to pay for the Medicare myself, because without social security checks to take the premium out of I would have to handle that myself. It took a few months to get the first bill and it was for 6 months. Almost $1,000 an amount I did not have.
The other side note is I had insurance under Covered California which I am at 65 no longer eligible for I have to convert to Medicare. And Medicare is $150 a month more than I was paying. There is a low income option, but I make a couple hundred dollars a year too much to qualify.

Talked to the Social Security/Medicare folks on the phone set up a payment plan there were “gottchas” that were not revealed to me and nothing was done in writing. My BAD! I go along thinking all is well until January when the gottcha caught me – I did not have the full amount paid off by 1/1/24 – and so the insurance will be cancelled effective 3/30/24 – I call I cry I was so frustrated, hurt and angry. I then had 5 months to pay by March (the extra month I had not paid, and jan, feb, march and they require the month ahead to be paid so April) I give up a lot, turn off all heat, and buy as little food as I can, cut back on any driving and manage to find the amount I need by 3/27/24. They will not take any online payment so I drive 30 miles to the office and drop it off. They do not reinstate my insurance. But they start taking the monthly amount out of my checking account. Well I have been back to the office twice, telling me it is all fixed or that they are working on it. Not really I don’t have insurance except for a day here a week there. I call folks I talk to folks at Social Security, at Medicare, at the senior center. Finally I contact my Congressman, well I have had at least one communication with the staff of my congressman every week for 2 months and today they finally reached out to Medicare !!!! In the meantime, I have gotten services here and there from Kaiser (my medical provider) and had weekly counseling sessions.. Today Kaiser is threatening to sue me for stealing services. There is no light left in this mess. I am so angry that I have to go though this. The health care system is not working acceptably.

Thinking of you all,
Kim in N. California

Rosemarie2972

Monique: I am sorry you and your co-workers are having an emotional time at work! Sounds draining!

RV Rita: I started to register for My Plate. GOV but got side tracked. Maybe while I am on vacation I will try and get into the site again! I really need more vegetables. I would say it is a crisis how little I eat veggies.

Rebecca: Love the pictures!

I have been busy exercising and cleaning the house. I went to yoga again this evening. I can't do some of it...especially 30
minutes into it. But I do feel stronger. I hope to keep it up! The college where I was exercising no longer plans to have a community exercise program so I am moving to a gym with another program. Some of the ladies will be moving over with me. I am really pleased with where my house is at as far as cleanliness and making progress in de-cluttering.

Carol: I hope that the black and blue and swelling goes away soon.

My son and DIL have gone radio silent on the purchase of a house. I think maybe they want to surprise me when they purchase the house. The curiosity is killing me. So hard to focus on my own life.

i am still on a Leonard Cohen exploration. He wrote about 230 songs and I hope to listen to them all. He wrote a song Dance Me to the End of Love that I simply love.

I am all packed and ready for my trip. I will leave tomorrow. I will spend Saturday night in Asheville and then head Sunday go to the retreat center. I need to double check the weather. I hope I sleep well tonight. I use the Calm app and this is very helpful!

I have also finally connected my Garmin Pedometer to my smart phone. This is helpful as far as recording sleep. And I purchased for $12.00 some blue tooth head phones and for another 10.00 a belt to hold the cell phone while I walk. All these things have enhanced my goals and my life.

My mother is sounding older when I talk to her. She still plays cards and bridge and goes food shopping with friends. But there is less detail in her conversation. She is 93. I will see her next month. I have decided to spend time with her and perhaps not see my in-laws on this visit. At least one of her sisters, age 90 is also coming to the wedding. My mother has been booked a room at the hotel. I think it isn't easy to be 93 and be in a strange hotel room. I am so pleased I relaxed this summer and enjoyed my back yard. Now I must face responsibility for my mother at the wedding.

I will try and post during the yoga retreat and let you know how it is going!

Best,
Rosemarie from Georgia

Rosemarie2972

I had a mother-daughter moment tonight on the phone. She said several times that she and I must be doing many of the same exercises with the yoga. I just kept saying maybe so. Really it irked me. I don't know why. She said many of the yoga moves were tiresome and not to do any I couldn't do. I felt like she thought I was 93. I guess I am closer to 93 than I want to admit! But I am trying so hard to do planks, and down dogs and lift my legs in the air while doing down dogs and it was clear she didn't appreciate nor understand my effort. oh well! We are quite different. She has been watching Columbo re-runs since her 50s. She is content with this. I would be bizerk. I have a short attention span. I also really think that for a long time she believed that because the Lawrence Welk singers were dressed so wholesome and singing such wholesome songs that as individuals they were truly wholesome. She couldn't seem to see they were entertainers. Oh well, I would probably be cranky at 93. She is very well humored and very cheerful.

Best,
Rosemarie from Georgia

LisaInArkansas

Kim - I am so sorry you're going through this. Many, many hugs...

pipcd34

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OregonMother

Oh Kim. That is nightmarish. I'm so sorry.

Flea
Willamette Valley OR

Rosemarie2972

I am so sorry Kim. Do you think Legal Aid could assist you at all? They have their own staff and then also pro bono volunteer attorneys that can be pretty sharp. I have consulted several times with RSSA. Registered Social Security Analysts.
I think it is around $50 to have a consultation by zoom with them. RSSA maintains that Social Security employees are frequently not that well trained and do make mistakes. My husband worked well into his 70s and didn't pay for Medicare part A and I don't think was required to sign up for Medicare Part B until he retired. Maybe it varies by who your employer is. He did not have part B until he retired.

Best,
Rosemarie from GA

OregonMother

I'm struggling a little with stepping away from my admin job. I'm not sorry I did; it was the right thing to do, but it feels strange not to be at the center of everything. To have meetings going on to which I am not only not invited, but to which I have no professional concern. It's just teaching now, which will be wonderful, but I think I am going to have a lot of time on my hands.

In other related news, my blood pressure is much lower.

And we tried bineshii wild rice for dinner tonight. Canoe harvested. We had it with black beans and sausage, and it was quite good. Much more flavorful than even basmati or jasmine rice.

https://bineshiiwildrice.store/

Flea
Willamette Valley OR

Rosemarie2972

Flea, So terrific that your BP is lower. I relate to what you are saying. When I stopped working, it took several years not to have the feeling that I should be working. Sounds like you are withdrawing from the work world gradually. That seems like it would be better than going cold turkey! For me it has been rather a journey trying to decide what to do with my free time. I have actually decided to stay in 3 days a week on purpose so that I can clean, write and knit....and keep up with this blog! I began to find the flitting in and out of the house every day tiring and without purpose!

If you are good with meetings though, I am sure there are non-profit boards that would love to have you on them!

Best,
Rosemarie from GA

Snowflake1968

Kim - Thanks so much. My lady is just starting to think about it, she doesn’t want to for at least 3 years, her husband was just diagnosed with cancer and she can’t think of not having this right now. She said that her son is also talking about taking it over but moving it to Calgary. I’ll just keep talking to her, a lot can happen in that time.
That’s amazing what that couple did for you. Do you love the business?

Rita - I’m sorry your daughter can’t let you live your life as you see fit. It’s a shame that people think they know what’s best for others.

Lanette- they can do so much with tiny homes that size now. Kaitlyn and Brodey keep promising that I will live in a granny cottage on their property when the time comes. I hope that that’s at least another 30-35 years.
I mentioned something about living another 40 years to Rodger the other day and he questioned me, but my grandmothers were both 95 when they passed so…🤷‍♀️. He pointed out that I should be expecting him to go much sooner. I didn’t say that I expect that too the way he smokes. Some things I just don’t need to comment on.
I bought his some blueberries today based on your recommendation.

On friends - I have friends for different things. One friend I can tell absolutely anything to and I know it will stay with her and she won’t judge me. We met on the first day of school in grade 2.
Another friend we talk daily and support one another in our marriages but there are things she doesn’t know. We are actually cousins, but lived away from one another. We became friends in our teens.
A third friend she and I also talk daily but we just tend to get through life together and discuss a lot of the same things we do on here. We have been friends for 24 years now.
Funnily enough when I knew we were losing the house I didn’t tell any of them anything.
I have another friend that used to know everything about me, but just before she was diagnosed with bipolar in a manic state she shared some of my thoughts on FB. I still speak to her and love her, but I’m more guarded. Her children are my Godchildren and I’ve known her since I dated her brother when I was 12.
I’m a very open person most people know what I think and what I’m about with very little prodding, but I have learned over the years that not everyone can be your friend.

I am actually quite lonely even with DH here. We enjoy each other and I let be him very much, but as he ages he has become quite the introvert and I am craving more activity. I so enjoy when we do something together but it seems to me that he only wants to do things when he’s on vacation. An example is on Friday evening after the races and after we had been in the hot tub he decided we needed to go and “cruise the streets” like teens used to. I so enjoyed it because he was animated and enjoying himself. I need to figure out how to get that here at home.

Lisa - I don’t know if I would be a good caregiver either. I hope if that time ever comes with DH that I am up to the task.
I love the poncho! Sorry you aren’t able to be near it.

I don’t talk about much that can be considered controversial. I don’t share anything on my FB that can be controversial and in conversations I try to keep my thoughts to myself. Thats actually another thing DH and I can’t discuss we have different views. I don’t even tell him who I vote for, I was taught that it was something to keep private anyway.

Michele - does the soup kitchen get so many donations that they have extras? Here they don’t have enough to feed the numbers that need it.

Kim - I’m so sorry your benefits are not what you need. I hope it all gets settled very fast.
I honestly don’t know how you all do it in the States.

Rosemarie - I hope that you are able to enjoy the visit with your mom.
I literally laughed out loud at the Lawrence Welk synopsis. My paternal grandmother loved it and watched it weekly, my maternal grandmother thought they danced too close or something she didn’t like it. Neither of them were overly religious just tried to be proper.

Flea - I understand that. I noticed when I was on my practicum I was missing being “in charge” of anything and really in having any say. I hope you settle in soon.

Well I didn’t actually hear from the job today, but I did hear from two of my references that they had received calls. One they actually spoke to and the other they played phone tag with. These two references were from the previous manor I worked at. The new job actually knows both of them and would trust them so they may not call my other two references.

I am hopeful if they connect with the 2!; one in the morning that I’ll hear something before end of day tomorrow. I have decided that if I haven’t heard anything by 1 or 2 I will send a follow up email.
It would be nice to have this settled before the long weekend.

I haven’t done anything productive all day except a couple loads of laundry. I hope I have some ambition tomorrow.
I may go to drop in painting in the afternoon to keep my mind occupied.

Tracey in Edmonton

skuehn48

cityjaneLondon

Kim - Really sorry you are going through this Kafka-esque nightmare. Years ago, I thought I had miscalculated and could owe thousands to the government. It turned out not, but my nights were riven by numbers flashing before me. One of the worst times of my life. I send my love.

Haven't got up yet, but I'm hoping no nerve pain.

Rosemarie - You are doing so well! Mothers do get to us don't they! Even when they haven't a clue! She is in her own world. Congratulations on the decluttering and cleaning. So satisfying.
At the moment I am living in a stewing nest on my queen size bed . Everything I need is piled in heaps on the other half of the bed! Medicine, toiletries, electronics, Extra clothes. I just lie there in my normal clothes, on top of the bedding. Even at night. John has to take my socks on and off! I feel like a depressed hoarder! Yesterday I could hardly move in the morning. Could walk by the afternoon.
But it is beginning to annoy me, which is a good sign. I will sort it out today.

John is stirring to get me a cup of tea. I need to take some painkillers.

Hugs for Monique. You are a special person.

Love to all, Heather UK xxxxxxxx

ginnytez

Kim-Sorry you are having so many problems. I have yet to transition to Medicare-I have insurance through my employer. When I turned 65 I got part A as required and won't have the others until I stop working. It is a complicated system that should not be so hard.

Heather-some of the nerve stuff can be normal with hips-they twist and turn quite a bit while they are in there. Part of what I am rehabbing now if my piriformis in left hip and I know it started after the hip surgery. Remember-each surgery is different and every recovery will be different.

Annie-I am glad that your father's party went well. In terms of the car, etc., him not driving is most important. It sounds like you and your sister have the paperwork set up so you can deal with his items as needed.

Allie-hope you enjoy cruise.

Monique-it is scary releasing children to some parents.

Flea-I think you have a good way of transitioning to retirement. I think that is part of my problem. We are posting for my new assistant and that will help. Yesterday I had a frustration and being tired of dealing with some of that stuff which is what is helping me move on plans.

Rosemarie-your mom could be starting to confuse who you are. Just try to go with the flow with the conversations. They are precious and do not last forever.

Lisa-good job with pantry.

Kylia-kittens are adorable. Hope you enjoyed storms last night! Was good to get the rain but got a bit heavy over here.

Going to one of youth events at noon today-we are having an ice cream bar at the end of a week long summer program. Good way to end the week.

Take care all,

Ginny in Ohio

TerriRichardson112

This is the post I reposted yesterday from July. Doesn’t seem to have posted.
Busy couple of hours. Had my eye test on Monday, with a fortnight for delivery. I’m reading at a function Tuesday 6 August and have been selecting pieces to read. So much work in the garden, but it’s worth it for the fresh veg.

Allie: Welcome to Onederland! 😂

Carol - That must have been a nasty fall. I hope the docs can get you some relief from the swelling and pain.

Sharon: Hi. Always good when someone comes back to us. 😂

Today I have some computer work I want to do, and laundry to put away.


Today the expected rain seems to be missing us in Ireland 😂 but it’s early yet!

Kim: That must be so stressful. The citizens advice idea is good if you have access to,one.
Heather: Fingers crossed that the nerve pain is temporary.
Annie: So glad that dad’s party went off well.

Gotta go and get dressed 😂. Let’s hope I don’t lose this post too ,

Virtual (((hugs))) held extra long and 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

🙋‍♀️ Miele failte to the newbies.

☘️ Terri

cityjaneLondon

Bbq not on tomorrow because the girls are rehearsing their final performance all weekend. DDIL didn't realise.
Bit sad, as I'm ready for company.
However, they've changed it to Monday early evening. We will leave in an Uber as soon as the cleaner has left, and my son will fire up his 'Egg' at 5.

The girls have been on their West End experience all week! I wish I could take part.
Here is the blurb. Sounds amazing. Lucky girls!

Max should be doing some evening sailing at the Marina.

Just about to have my coffee.
Love Heather UK xxxxxx

Anniesquats100

Good morning beautiful ladies!

Rosemarie have fun at your yoga retreat! Sounds like a great time.

Kim so sorry about the screw up. It's so hard dealing with these agencies.

Heather and Carol thinking about you as you recover.

Machka hope all is well! Missing you!

I am still exhausted by the whole party thing. I cleaned up all my little notes, so now I am lost without them. Plus so much leftover food! But I still have to hit the grocery store today.

Dad stayed up and finished his new jigsaw puzzle. Next I have to figure out his electronic chess board so he can play that. And work on thank you cards. And a thousand other little chores.

Have a fantastic day! May you all be happy, healthy, safe and free!

Annie in Delaware

SophieRosieMom

Tracey - sounds like progress with them calling references. Crossing fingers you have some positive news real soon. How's the smoke up your way?

Rosemarie - I can't remember - is your mom in assisted living? If she's still in her own house/apartment, are there siblings close by or someone to check up on her? Glad to hear you are spending more time at your house doing things you enjoy, and hope you can see your son's new house soon. Enjoy the Yoga retreat.

Rita - I think you are doing a remarkable job considering you have to navigate a little around your DH's suppertime menu.

Kim - what a mess! I ran into some questions with Soc Sec/Medicare several years ago. Nothing like yours, but I ended up calling them. The person I spoke to seemed to have no clue what I was asking about and I finally told her "well, it's on the website!" DUH! Must have been her first day after a week of training. Scary. Hope everything gets resolved with Kaiser. I just had a thought. I know you didn't ask for advice, but how did you get signed up with Kaiser? Did you use an insurance broker? If so, they might have some ideas. And even if you didn't it might be worth making a phone call to one - if that's the way it works in CA. In WA, it seems they are generous with their advice, at least mine is. Good luck.

Flea - how much longer until your retirement date? It's definitely different trying to adjust to a new level. Hope it's not too stressful for you. I went through something sort of similar and kept reminding myself to "bloom where I'm planted." Thanks for the garbage disposal tablet info. So far I'm sort of keeping things under control with baking soda & vinegar, and sometimes I run a tray of ice cubes through it which I think knocks off nasty bits.

Talked to Roger across the street yesterday, and we decided we are done fighting dandelions, just let them bloom and stop wasting gas in the mower fighting a battle we can't win. He has a very nice lawn and spends a lot of time keeping it nice, but dandelions have invaded his too. I just keep the drapes pulled so I don't have to look at them, lol.

I've started to go through my closet and dresser again to weed out more clothing I'll never wear. A couple years ago, I decided to get more tops. I used the sizing guides when I ordered online, but most of them were too big, or just didn't fit right. Thought I could make them work last winter, but have given up and I'm getting bags ready for the thrift store. Up until the pandemic, I could buy tops and jeans that fit (and that I could try on) either at the Dress Barn or Christopher and Banks. Both stores have gone out of business, at least in my area. So time to reassess and whittle down. I'm probably OK for quite a while with what I have.

Lanette
SW WA State where it's a muggy 65 degrees and the sun isn't even up yet.

pipcd34

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