A confession to the MFP Police

BeachIron

I deleted a "friend" on here recently. This person would complain about the "idiots" that were on here who were asking for help and misguided. I deleted this person because misguided people are not idiots. In America today there is a whole lot more incorrect and unhealthy information on losing weight and becoming healthy than there is correct information. People tend to dive into what the fad is or whatever worked for someone else and then, it doesn't work. They proceed to ask for help because they are trying and they get made fun of or people are rude to them etc. I saw it first hand with the person I just referred too.

1. Help - the genuine positive supportive kind of help - is a GREAT thing.

2. Thinking that you are better than someone because you have had success and thus treating people like you are better than them is what I am talking about. These are the MFP police. The people who think that they are better than everyone else.

If you have no idea what I am talking about, that is awesome. You have not run into one yet. And, I hope that you do not have to.

I personally would have liked this quite a bit more if you had started with something like this. There are a handful of intentionally unhelpful people on here but they don't usually last long. IMHO, the rest are trying their best to help and at least just not cause too many problems.

MzManiak

I love this post too and agree that they are waaayyyy too many bullies on MFP, hiding behind their computer.

I have yet to see any bullies. Seriously, people act like there's posters that just go around picking on people because they have nothing better to do. The "bullies" most people are talking about are actually offering help (sometimes sarcastically, big whoop) to someone who has asked for it. They don't just go around peeking in diaries for the heck of it and belittling people.

PikaKnight

I love this post too and agree that they are waaayyyy too many bullies on MFP, hiding behind their computer.

No kidding. You are correct but it is safe there hiding behind their computer screen.

I am much more forceful and condescending in person.

Hai Whierd :flowerforyou:

BeachIron

Hmm. Maybe knowledgeable posters should just stop trying to help. There appears to be a lot of resentment toward their efforts. That's sad.

It's why so many knowledgable and helpful people have left the forums or the site altogether. It takes entirely too much patience to put up with all of the anger and derp.

This is true. I've noticed a significant drop-off too.

And for those that are stuck on "credentials", they had them.

QFT - the true experts won't put up with this. The one's I've had on my FL come into the forums and quickly leave.

odusgolp

As long as we're confessing, I STILL don't know what TDEE is, not because I don't know how to look it up because it's probably more detail than I need.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/818082-exercise-calories-again-wtf

That's a good read. Not what I was looking for, though.

In any event, people have opinions of one way over another... It's really just that... opinion. Do what works for you.

kravmark2

Maria, now that is freakin funny

Just wanted to say that I love the original post by the author of this thread!!! SOOOO worth reading. Kinda got lost in all the responses but the point is do it your way.. **** the haters.

If you're getting results from the way that works for you good! If you are not, then maybe you should make some changes. But this is a lifestyle change and in order for it to last it has to be a change that can be done by real people

Just sayin

Mark

JenRunTriHappyGirl

I just want to see the post where someone said "Things are going great and I lost 35 lbs!" and someone said "Well clearly the problem is you gotta weigh your coffee creamer fatty"

Luckily, I have not had this happen to me..... I like to try to find a solution on my own first. So, I read. I read posts on here. I read replies to questions. And I am embarrassed that there are people on here that behave the way that some do. See, if (when) I catch my CHILDREN treating others the way some ADULTS on here treat people, there is hell to pay. So when I see adults doing this to people, it disgusts me. And a lot of the time, the people that are getting bullied are too afraid to stand up for themselves.

PikaKnight

It's not the help that most resent...it's their tone. I've been called stupid more here in the last two days than ever in my life. Starting to wonder how I ever became valedictorian of my class.

When I was in nursing school 10 years ago, the hospitals I did my clinicals in used electronic thermometers with a blue probe for oral temp and a red probe for the back door temp. The valedictorian of my nursing class didn't know the difference between the two and put the anal end in someone's mouth.

Just sayin'.

I literally lol'd

Achrya

As long as we're confessing, I STILL don't know what TDEE is, not because I don't know how to look it up because it's probably more detail than I need.

It's my preferred method because, frankly, I'm to lazy to be playing with figuring out how many calories I burn working out/having my calories pingpong a lot/eating 1300 calories on days I don't work out.

It's not a better method by any means, just one that works for certain people in certain situations. Also they do generally end up being very similar, intake wise.

janalayn

I think you are my hero. Thanks for sharing

Achrya

I just want to see the post where someone said "Things are going great and I lost 35 lbs!" and someone said "Well clearly the problem is you gotta weigh your coffee creamer fatty"

Luckily, I have not had this happen to me..... I like to try to find a solution on my own first. So, I read. I read posts on here. I read replies to questions. And I am embarrassed that there are people on here that behave the way that some do. See, if (when) I catch my CHILDREN treating others the way some ADULTS on here treat people, there is hell to pay. So when I see adults doing this to people, it disgusts me. And a lot of the time, the people that are getting bullied are too afraid to stand up for themselves.

Well then, may i request an example of this 'bullying' you have seen?

PhearlessPhreaks

I second a great many others- I love you and your post! (it sounds a lot like me, btw) :drinker:

nena49659

It's not the help that most resent...it's their tone. I've been called stupid more here in the last two days than ever in my life. Starting to wonder how I ever became valedictorian of my class.

I remember a specific thread you were in and no one called you stupid, but they did question your attitude about something based on an urban legend someone copied and pasted from Facebook that you were using as the basis for your own argument.

An urban legend that's been debunked a thousand times and has no scientific backing whatsoever.

So ... You're probably not stupid, but you may need to work on critical thinking skills. That is not people here being mean or "the MFP police."

And, put the way that you just did, I may have listened much sooner. I have never claimed to be an expert in any way on that topic. Also, I do not know the credible sites to go look for on that particular subject. Nor, do I have the time to look for them.

It was the tone that everyone was using towards the poster and the subsequent people that dared to post on that subject that got my hackles up. People with knowledge do not have to be rude to get their points across. Or, use sarcasm to cut people down. If they are trying to be helpful...be helpful without the attitudes.

RGv2

I just want to see the post where someone said "Things are going great and I lost 35 lbs!" and someone said "Well clearly the problem is you gotta weigh your coffee creamer fatty"

Luckily, I have not had this happen to me..... I like to try to find a solution on my own first. So, I read. I read posts on here. I read replies to questions. And I am embarrassed that there are people on here that behave the way that some do. See, if (when) I catch my CHILDREN treating others the way some ADULTS on here treat people, there is hell to pay. So when I see adults doing this to people, it disgusts me. And a lot of the time, the people that are getting bullied are too afraid to stand up for themselves.

Keep them away from:

Political Forums
Sports Forums
Game Forums
Parenting Forums
Religious Forums

This place is so tame, in comparison to the rest of the web.

da_bears10089

IIFYM

ryry_

I just want to see the post where someone said "Things are going great and I lost 35 lbs!" and someone said "Well clearly the problem is you gotta weigh your coffee creamer fatty"

Luckily, I have not had this happen to me..... I like to try to find a solution on my own first. So, I read. I read posts on here. I read replies to questions. And I am embarrassed that there are people on here that behave the way that some do. See, if (when) I catch my CHILDREN treating others the way some ADULTS on here treat people, there is hell to pay. So when I see adults doing this to people, it disgusts me. And a lot of the time, the people that are getting bullied are too afraid to stand up for themselves.

Do you report those posts? I guess I don't see the bullying...Or maybe I'm the bully IDK.

PikaKnight

It's not the help that most resent...it's their tone. I've been called stupid more here in the last two days than ever in my life. Starting to wonder how I ever became valedictorian of my class.

I remember a specific thread you were in and no one called you stupid, but they did question your attitude about something based on an urban legend someone copied and pasted from Facebook that you were using as the basis for your own argument.

An urban legend that's been debunked a thousand times and has no scientific backing whatsoever.

So ... You're probably not stupid, but you may need to work on critical thinking skills. That is not people here being mean or "the MFP police."

And, put the way that you just did, I may have listened much sooner. I have never claimed to be an expert in any way on that topic. Also, I do not know the credible sites to go look for on that particular subject. Nor, do I have the time to look for them.

It was the tone that everyone was using towards the poster and the subsequent people that dared to post on that subject that got my hackles up. People with knowledge do not have to be rude to get their points across. Or, use sarcasm to cut people down. If they are trying to be helpful...be helpful without the attitudes.

Tone is hard to interpret via text. Maybe try focusing on what is being said versus imagining how it is being said?

SlimJanette

Thank you, this is a great post!

joanthemom8

LOL - lots of similarities - I used to NOT log my cream either - I started doing it, but I only log 1 serving (even though I have 2 or 3 cups of coffee). I NEVER drink enough water. I try not to eat my exercise calories back. TTDEE (or whatever) just seems to darn complicated to me. I don't monitor my heart rate - I turn beat red, sweat profusely and breath heavy - I figure I'm getting enough exercise. I do measure and weigh my food occasionally because I realize I underestimate portions.
You are obviously doing something right!