"Why are you single?"

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  • lorenzovonmatterhorn7549
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    I would rather be alone and happy than with someone who makes me miserable
  • cagefan
    cagefan Posts: 194 Member
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    I AM PICKY AND I DESERVE TO BE THAT WAY !!!!! :smile:
  • xRay85Rayx
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    Focusing on me right now...
  • CheekyBrahette
    CheekyBrahette Posts: 441 Member
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    I'm single because I chose to get a divorce after ten years of marriage. We were just oil and water and couldn't mix well. Our divorce has been amicable. We honestly work better together as friends.
  • jfurrrr
    jfurrrr Posts: 43 Member
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    I'm extremely picky and won't settle just to be in a relationship.

    I went on a date with this guy once and during our date he told me that I need to lower my standards because men like him would never want to date me because I was overweight. I just blew him off after that date and he proceded to call me for well over a year asking to see me again. Lol.
  • LeviLeDoux
    LeviLeDoux Posts: 151 Member
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    I usually answer that question that I'm single by choice, which is usually true. My answer now would be because I just broke up with my bf.
  • SkimFlatWhite68
    SkimFlatWhite68 Posts: 1,254 Member
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    I'm a single parent with 100% care of my child and I work full time. Makes it difficult to date. I'll be dating again in 2018 when my daughter has finished school, what are you doing on the 2nd of January?

    (I have actually said this)
  • donthesitate
    donthesitate Posts: 255 Member
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    Lol I have no idea how I would answer that question, how would you answer that question? I think I would tend toward... I fell in love with the wrong people more than once lol... But isn't that how everyone ends up single unless they really are "*kitten*"

    Exactly.
  • _KrisMarie_
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    Having been in a bad marriage once, I'd rather stay single than be with the wrong person again just for the sake of being with someone. I do date though, and I've met some nice guys (and some jaded ones - don't let yourself get jaded!), so we'll see what happens...
  • _KrisMarie_
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    I got asked "why, are at your age, have you never been married". I replied "Marriage offers no benefits to the male species." Yea, she was mad LOL
    .

    Didn't I see a study about that once? I think it said married people live longer, healthier lives.
  • fivethreeone
    fivethreeone Posts: 8,196 Member
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    Not single, but I don't see how that question is rude. It's gonna come up eventually anyways, when it comes up is irrelevant. If the answer is damaging to the possibility of a future relationship it's not going to get better with time. If it's not damaging to the relationship then what's the argument?

    Because maybe the person you're asking isn't comfortable giving a glib, one-line "because I'm awesome" response. Because maybe it's NOYDB. I just think conversation should be light in the beginning, not straight to the gut shot.

    The only person who would take it as a gut shot is a person who thinks it's a horrible thing.
  • celadontea
    celadontea Posts: 335 Member
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    "Why are you single"? LOL...what do you want the person you're interested in to be married?
  • anemoneprose
    anemoneprose Posts: 1,805 Member
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    Not single, but I don't see how that question is rude. It's gonna come up eventually anyways, when it comes up is irrelevant. If the answer is damaging to the possibility of a future relationship it's not going to get better with time. If it's not damaging to the relationship then what's the argument?

    Because maybe the person you're asking isn't comfortable giving a glib, one-line "because I'm awesome" response. Because maybe it's NOYDB. I just think conversation should be light in the beginning, not straight to the gut shot.

    The only person who would take it as a gut shot is a person who thinks it's a horrible thing.

    Hmm maybe. I am thrilled to be single, more than ok with it & that answer would be honest. But the question is really trying to get at stuff about the past. In a high-stakes meeting, it's normal to be concerned about feeling judged about the past, if it was unhappy & the norm is being married, presuming trust and common ground haven't been established. Which is why it's a rude question imo. I'd volunteer my file if I liked the guy, otherwise, not his business.
  • JuantonBliss
    JuantonBliss Posts: 245 Member
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    On a recent episode of Tough Love they had speed dates - they were given literally one minute to talk and most of the people asked the other "Why are you single?'". I kind of liked the one guy's answer: "Because I'm a *kitten*." But the rest just squirmed and lied and minimized...one guy uncomfortably admitted to a couple of women that it was because he'd cheated on every girlfriend he ever had, but isn't that kind of TMI for a 1-minute speed date?

    So how do you answer that question when you get it? Do you answer with the stock "I just haven't found the right person"? I mean, it would take some serious gut-purging (not to mention a full review of all my past relationships) to explain why I'm single, but that's not something I'm going to do with anyone but close friends or family, or a therapist if I had one.

    For those that ask that question on the first date - and I know you're out there - don't you think that's a pretty rude question to ask someone you barely know?


    WAIT WHAT!??!!?!? THERE'S A NEW SEASON OF TOUGH LOVE!??!? WHEN DID THIS START!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????????
    Frantic_Shinobu_by_jaggedice200.gif

    And I'm single cause I seem to attract the wrong guys. I guess I'm just not in that right set of mind just yet.

    Also, no. Admitting that you're a cheater is not TMI. You might aswell be straight up front. You're there for a reason, and getting played IS NOT one of them.
  • JuantonBliss
    JuantonBliss Posts: 245 Member
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    Yes I have been asked numerous times but usually it is in the form of a complement ..lol..or I just choose to take it well:)

    But really I am single because I was fat and ugly for many years, raising my kids and getting a masters degree....now I am stuck, I still have a fat girl mentality so confidence about how I look is not as high but want a nice guy with a good education and they want hotter than i am...lol...see it is a losing proposition.

    I feel you there hun <3 I always seem to go for the losers, and the guys that seem to be the winners for me, my self-esteem is too low and then I become self-destructive and ruin the relationship.


    I guess that's your answer right there hah
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,026 Member
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    I get that question a lot. I suppose the truth is "I am unlovable."
  • lacroyx
    lacroyx Posts: 5,754 Member
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    It's a combination of physical and mental for me. Mentally it's a lack of confidence, physically because I'm fat, no girl I find attractive, would be attracted to a fatty, plus I work nights including weekends shrinking my potential pool of women I could meet. Because of the nightshift job I have and my sleeping habits, I sleep through out the afternoon/evening, any dating I were to do would be morning dates or on Monday/Tuesdays if I were to do a night time date. All of this I know are excuses though because I've seen people working nightshift jobs that are overweight and are dating and in relationships.
  • BattleTaxi
    BattleTaxi Posts: 752 Member
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    I make all the boys cry, literally. I'm content with myself, but I would like to share my life and experiences with someone else. Truthfully, I don't think I could stomach another brief relationship that results in the same ending: I'm brash, cruel in my honesty, and there is always a cultural misunderstanding. (I don't think my ex's have any idea what Latin or Caribbean culture is outside of tacos, being loud, and mowing lawns.)

    Otherwise, not to gloat, but I'm usually the friend everyone loves and wants to have around.