Has self love gone too far?

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  • Claire_x90
    Claire_x90 Posts: 94
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    If an anorexic girl did this people would be outraged, so why is the reverse ok?
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    If she was 200, that'd be cool. If you're a 300lb woman you are morbidly obese and need to lay off the god damned cheeseburgers, not parade around naked telling everyone you're beautiful. You're sick and need help mentally and physically if you let yourself get that far out of control.

    Actually, she wasn't telling everyone that she was beautiful. She was telling herself to be beautiful.
  • Mokey41
    Mokey41 Posts: 5,769 Member
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    I disagree that obese has ever been considered sexually attractive. Slightly overweight? Pleasingly plump? Displaying that you have enough fat stores to carry a baby to full term despite spotty access to food? Yes. But never morbid obesity or anything even approaching it. MHO.
    Have you ever heard the term "Rubenesque"?
    Those women weren't 300 pounds, sure, but 200-250, definitely. And they were the ideal for a great while.
    ...Its 2013.

    An ideal woman was plump enough to carry a baby through hard times and still fit enough to work in the fields if you were an average person. My grandfather said you pick a wife that's big and strong enough to carry 2 5 gallon pails of water without spilling any! The Reubenesque woman was the rich mans ideal of a pampered woman. In Africa it's still considered a sign of prosperity to have a fat wife, not sure it's considered beautiful, just a sign that you can feed her well and she doesn't need to work.
  • LumpySpacePrincess1
    LumpySpacePrincess1 Posts: 388 Member
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    But FUPA.
    If she wants to be beautiful she should probably stop sabotaging her body with food.
    Dead is only beautiful to necrophiles.
  • init2fitit
    init2fitit Posts: 168 Member
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    I honestly don't care what this woman is doing. Like I read the OP, and the responses (its cute that someone brought up evolutionary psychology in an attempt to explain why 300 pounds isn't attractive because well it is, i mean humans have starved for much of their life and you'd damn well bet that if you can hunt enough caribou to get to 300lbs, you're getting your pick of the mates from the tribe)

    But seriously! I'm going to worry about what I'm doing for my health, just like she needs to worry about her health alone! I don't think it should be an open commentary. Hell, If I loved my body enough to walk around in a bikini as it is, I don't think that I'd have even bothered to look up this site.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    But FUPA.
    If she wants to be beautiful she should probably stop sabotaging her body with food.
    Dead is only beautiful to necrophiles.

    Well before she can want to stop hurting herself, she has to be able to love herself.

    It's a vicious cycle, I realize, but why can't people understand that she has to start somewhere.
  • sobriquet84
    sobriquet84 Posts: 607 Member
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    But FUPA.
    If she wants to be beautiful she should probably stop sabotaging her body with food.
    Dead is only beautiful to necrophiles.

    Well before she can want to stop hurting herself, she has to be able to love herself.

    It's a vicious cycle, I realize, but why can't people understand that she has to start somewhere.

    so you have to act like a total nutjob in order to love yourself?
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    But FUPA.
    If she wants to be beautiful she should probably stop sabotaging her body with food.
    Dead is only beautiful to necrophiles.

    Well before she can want to stop hurting herself, she has to be able to love herself.

    It's a vicious cycle, I realize, but why can't people understand that she has to start somewhere.

    so you have to act like a total nutjob in order to love yourself?

    Well no, I suspect she was just a total nutjob in the first place. But this is what she had to do to begin to learn to love herself.
  • TheGymGypsy
    TheGymGypsy Posts: 1,023 Member
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    I made a huge mistake. lol
  • TheSlorax
    TheSlorax Posts: 2,401 Member
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    If she was 200, that'd be cool. If you're a 300lb woman you are morbidly obese and need to lay off the god damned cheeseburgers, not parade around naked telling everyone you're beautiful. You're sick and need help mentally and physically if you let yourself get that far out of control.

    .... really. ok then.
  • ash8184
    ash8184 Posts: 701 Member
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    I think so. The "big beautiful woman" craze has gone too far. As a former almost 400lb gal, it's really important to love oneself, but that's different than loving but expecting health for yourself too. If you truly love yourself, you'll take care of your body and being healthy is what it's all about!

    That said, in order to become healthy, it's important to love yourself along the way. You can't go from 400lbs to 150lbs overnight, so you have to tell yourself that you're worthwhile enough to make the changes along the way. It's all about being healthy.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    I made a huge mistake. lol

    No. You engaged a thought-provoking discussion. That is never a mistake.
  • TheSlorax
    TheSlorax Posts: 2,401 Member
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    But FUPA.
    If she wants to be beautiful she should probably stop sabotaging her body with food.
    Dead is only beautiful to necrophiles.

    Well before she can want to stop hurting herself, she has to be able to love herself.

    It's a vicious cycle, I realize, but why can't people understand that she has to start somewhere.

    I see where you're coming from on this now, and I agree with that. I am still uncomfortable with some of the "fat acceptance" lines it crosses, but that is because of my own prejudices and is not her doing.
  • LumpySpacePrincess1
    LumpySpacePrincess1 Posts: 388 Member
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    But FUPA.
    If she wants to be beautiful she should probably stop sabotaging her body with food.
    Dead is only beautiful to necrophiles.

    Well before she can want to stop hurting herself, she has to be able to love herself.

    It's a vicious cycle, I realize, but why can't people understand that she has to start somewhere.
    I don't think embarrassing herself in front of Hank Schrader and that one incognito black guy is going to help her love herself.
    I don't think she even made any mention of an attempt to not be femme-Shamu.
    If an anorexic did this I'd say the same.
    If you look like you're fat enough to be the iceberg that brought down the Titanic, or skinny enough to be used as a rectangular frisbee, then they're in clear need of medical attention.
    Not naked subway escapades and captions declaring themselvesto be white.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    But FUPA.
    If she wants to be beautiful she should probably stop sabotaging her body with food.
    Dead is only beautiful to necrophiles.

    Well before she can want to stop hurting herself, she has to be able to love herself.

    It's a vicious cycle, I realize, but why can't people understand that she has to start somewhere.

    I see where you're coming from on this now, and I agree with that. I am still uncomfortable with some of the "fat acceptance" lines it crosses, but that is because of my own prejudices and is not her doing.

    Believe me, I do not support the "fat acceptance" movement. But I didn't really get that was what she was doing here.

    The words on her body were "Be Beautiful" not "I'm Beautiful" and she was taking selfies that she stated she was taking for herself to review and look at later. She posted them on the internet to see if anyone understood where she was coming from and to gain a little encouragement to continue. Some got it, some didn't. That's the risk you take with art.
  • BITEME_GRRR
    BITEME_GRRR Posts: 150 Member
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    Honestly.....I was a little grossed out by the pictures. I think its important to LOVE AND ACCEPT oneself just as they are ANDDDDDD be willing to change for the better.

    She is doing the former, which is good, but really she should love who she is not necessarily the fact that she is obese. that is just unhealthy and she should be trying to improve it. i'm not saying she needs to be a ripped size zero, but IMHO 300 pounds is really quite excessive.
  • TheSlorax
    TheSlorax Posts: 2,401 Member
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    But FUPA.
    If she wants to be beautiful she should probably stop sabotaging her body with food.
    Dead is only beautiful to necrophiles.

    Well before she can want to stop hurting herself, she has to be able to love herself.

    It's a vicious cycle, I realize, but why can't people understand that she has to start somewhere.
    I don't think embarrassing herself in front of Hank Schrader and that one incognito black guy is going to help her love herself.
    I don't think she even made any mention of an attempt to not be femme-Shamu.
    If an anorexic did this I'd say the same.
    If you look like you're fat enough to be the iceberg that brought down the Titanic, or skinny enough to be used as a rectangular frisbee, then they're in clear need of medical attention.
    Not naked subway escapades and captions declaring themselvesto be white.

    normally I really like you because you do make me LOL a lot, but really... "femme-shamu"? "the iceberg that brought down titanic"? "rectangular frisbee"? can we not use mean terms to describe women's bodies?
    Believe me, I do not support the "fat acceptance" movement. But I didn't really get that was what she was doing here.

    The words on her body were "Be Beautiful" and she was taking selfies that she stated she was taking for herself to review and look at. She posted them on the internet to see if anyone understood where she was coming from and to gain a little encouragement to continue. Some got it, some didn't. That's the risk you take with art.


    I'll admit I did not consider it art at first until you pointed that out. I don't really DO art so I completely missed that angle of it. I wish she had kept the original "I'm vulnerable" message, because then it would have been relevant whether she was thin or big (she's in her underwear on the subway for crying out loud). the "be beautiful" with the subtext of "in spite of being fat" really bugs me.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    But FUPA.
    If she wants to be beautiful she should probably stop sabotaging her body with food.
    Dead is only beautiful to necrophiles.

    Well before she can want to stop hurting herself, she has to be able to love herself.

    It's a vicious cycle, I realize, but why can't people understand that she has to start somewhere.
    I don't think embarrassing herself in front of Hank Schrader and that one incognito black guy is going to help her love herself.
    I don't think she even made any mention of an attempt to not be femme-Shamu.
    If an anorexic did this I'd say the same.
    If you look like you're fat enough to be the iceberg that brought down the Titanic, or skinny enough to be used as a rectangular frisbee, then they're in clear need of medical attention.
    Not naked subway escapades and captions declaring themselvesto be white.

    You know, I know you are trying to shroud your, otherwise intellectual response, in humor, but its just coming off as obnoxious.

    Anyway, getting to the meat and potatoes of your argument, people who think that she did this to declare her body as beautiful would probably act the same way if an anorexic woman had done this. People who understand her true intent, which was to force herself to love herself in spite of her appearance, would have probably also defended the anorexic woman in turn. Anorexics also despise themselves, and have to learn to love themselves before they can get healthy again.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
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    If an anorexic girl did this people would be outraged, so why is the reverse ok?

    TRUTH
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
    Options
    But FUPA.
    If she wants to be beautiful she should probably stop sabotaging her body with food.
    Dead is only beautiful to necrophiles.

    Well before she can want to stop hurting herself, she has to be able to love herself.

    It's a vicious cycle, I realize, but why can't people understand that she has to start somewhere.
    I don't think embarrassing herself in front of Hank Schrader and that one incognito black guy is going to help her love herself.
    I don't think she even made any mention of an attempt to not be femme-Shamu.
    If an anorexic did this I'd say the same.
    If you look like you're fat enough to be the iceberg that brought down the Titanic, or skinny enough to be used as a rectangular frisbee, then they're in clear need of medical attention.
    Not naked subway escapades and captions declaring themselvesto be white.

    normally I really like you because you do make me LOL a lot, but really... "femme-shamu"? "the iceberg that brought down titanic"? "rectangular frisbee"? can we not use mean terms to describe women's bodies?
    Believe me, I do not support the "fat acceptance" movement. But I didn't really get that was what she was doing here.

    The words on her body were "Be Beautiful" and she was taking selfies that she stated she was taking for herself to review and look at. She posted them on the internet to see if anyone understood where she was coming from and to gain a little encouragement to continue. Some got it, some didn't. That's the risk you take with art.


    I'll admit I did not consider it art at first until you pointed that out. I don't really DO art so I completely missed that angle of it. I wish she had kept the original "I'm vulnerable" message, because then it would have been relevant whether she was thin or big (she's in her underwear on the subway for crying out loud). the "be beautiful" with the subtext of "in spite of being fat" really bugs me.

    Well not everyone is going to like an individual's form of self-expression, but yeah, way back at the beginning of the article/blog/whatever it is, she states that she is an artist.

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