Do you men really want a low maintenance woman?
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I'm really loving this thread, but, like a few others, I didn't read through the 7+ pages of conversation, so I, too, apologize if I repeat anything. With that being said, we're off.
I'm currently dating a guy who has dated both high- and low-maintenance women. He likes to do nice things like take his girl out for a nice dinner a couple times a month or so and make sure she's taken care of (financially and emotionally - he's not afraid to give hugs or hold me). He's a pretty low-maintenance dude financially except when it comes to his hobby (he races sprint cars on the weekends, soooo $_$). He doesn't need designer anything.
Meanwhile, I'm pretty low-maintenance myself (unless it's Disney stuff, haha!). I grew up a tomboy and have a degree in Construction (worked in the construction testing industry, too, and was VERY proud to be the only chick on the job site in most cases!). I don't buy anything designer (though we keep our money separate and plan to after marriage as well). I'm very independent financially and always have been. I hardly wear makeup but get my hair cut every eight to ten weeks, which is my expense. Plus, I can change my own oil and brakes.
Dude, Spinderella95 - PROPS, lady. I wish I had enough cash to go exotic with cars - or classic since I love me some muscle cars.
And amandamae6128, I SO agree. I try my best not to nag and agree that it's more of an emotional thing.
The biggest thing we need to remember is to be there for our significant other and want to be a better person for them. I know it sounds corny or lame, but he makes me want to be a better woman for him. However, the bottom line is this - if they do not love you for you, then they aren't worth it. You are AWESOME, and never forget it.0 -
I consider myself high-maintenance. Would he have to pull me kicking and screaming from my comfy bed everyday? Yes. Would I make him cancel dinner reservations because my sixth run of Skyrim is more important? Yes. Would he have to tell me to cut my hair because my fringe had slowly covered my whole face? Damn right he'd have to. I can't even make a bed or work a washing machine. My hands aren't used to temperatures above 'cold' so forget the dishes.
Everyone has stuff that makes up for the bad stuff though. I'm an awesome cook, I can fix anything if it's electronic, I don't need constant reminders that he's into me because it's always sexytime, I don't even own a phone to send nagging texts with, I have no female friends to ***** about him to, I'm awesome, I give great hugs... I'm awesome -wait did I say that before?
I think high/low-maintenance is really whether a guy thinks the pros out-weigh the cons. If the cons are too much the relationship will be hard to maintain, if he can look past that then it'll be easy. People who don't spend 2 hours getting ready can be high-maintenance too, y'know, just in a different way.
QFT0 -
Alos, I think a lot more than 2% of women can get away with being low-maintenance, but they don't believe they can, so they spend hours and hours being high-maintenance. And some of them come out of it looking worse than without all the makeup and super-processed hair.
Just sayin'.
THIS0 -
I am not High Maintenance and I am sexy as all get out. LOL I believe that women *ALL* women are so beautiful. If we could shut off the media and allow our souls to accept ourselves as we are from the inside out with self esteem, we wouldn't be so caught up in unnecessary drama. Now don't misunderstand I am not saying I don't do the girl girl thing because I do- but I can also walk out of my house with no makeup , wearing blue jeans and a tshirt and flip flops with my chapstick and still maintain a womanly glow. If no one loves me I Love Me and I am beautiful. Stretch Marks and Cellulite.0
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Several women have responded with their "routine" and say they are low maintenance. Some have listed things like shampooing hair, air drying hair, ponytails etc. My question for you ladies is, do you shave? Legs?, Underarms? Other places :blushing: ?
I do. All of the above. Everyday. I wash and dry my hair. Everyday. I wear a little bit of makeup. About as much as you see in my profile pic. My clothes are always neat and clean. Pressed even, when called for. My "routine" can be completed in about 35-40 minutes. I am usually ready before everyone else. That includes men.
Oh, and some of the guys have mentioned not liking to have their time wasted by waiting around. I totally agree. I get really pi$$ed off when I go away with my girlfriends and I offer to get in the shower last, so give them a head start on their "routine". Sometimes a full hour after them, and I am still standing around waiting on them to "be ready".
Not sure if any of the above makes me low maintenance or high. Either way, I'll live with it.
OP specifically stated not including showers. I do all the hair washing and shaving in the shower, and I only do one a day alternating days.0 -
I am not High Maintenance and I am sexy as all get out. LOL I believe that women *ALL* women are so beautiful. If we could shut off the media and allow our souls to accept ourselves as we are from the inside out with self esteem, we wouldn't be so caught up in unnecessary drama. Now don't misunderstand I am not saying I don't do the girl girl thing because I do- but I can also walk out of my house with no makeup , wearing blue jeans and a tshirt and flip flops with my chapstick and still maintain a womanly glow. If no one loves me I Love Me and I am beautiful. Stretch Marks and Cellulite.
Love this post!0 -
A high maintenance woman will constantly put her man in a position where he must make otherwise unnecessary sacrifices--whether of his money, time, effort, or of his mental/emotional well being--because unlike a normal woman, who can understand and process many different forms of love and affection, she is only capable of understanding sacrifice.
:huh: you've got to be kidding right?
I pay for my own hair, nails, cosmetics, clothes, shoes, procedures, etc. I make more money than my SO. I require nothing from him other than friendship and love. Time, effort and sacrifice for the good of the family is something we BOTH put in and is to be expected for any relationship.
I believe I mentioned having my own definition of low/high maintenance before saying the excerpt you quoted. It has nothing to do with looks. I then went on to say that I do also appreciate a woman who tends to keep the aesthetic stuff to a minimum because I like what it says about her sense of practicality. Take for example high heels. I hate them with a passion. My ideal woman would wear sneakers whenever the situation permitted because of their practicality.0 -
A high maintenance woman will constantly put her man in a position where he must make otherwise unnecessary sacrifices--whether of his money, time, effort, or of his mental/emotional well being--because unlike a normal woman, who can understand and process many different forms of love and affection, she is only capable of understanding sacrifice.
:huh: you've got to be kidding right?
I pay for my own hair, nails, cosmetics, clothes, shoes, procedures, etc. I make more money than my SO. I require nothing from him other than friendship and love. Time, effort and sacrifice for the good of the family is something we BOTH put in and is to be expected for any relationship.
I believe I mentioned having my own definition of low/high maintenance before saying the excerpt you quoted. It has nothing to do with looks. I then went on to say that I do also appreciate a woman who tends to keep the aesthetic stuff to a minimum because I like what it says about her sense of practicality. Take for example high heels. I hate them with a passion. My ideal woman would wear sneakers whenever the situation permitted because of their practicality.
mmmk.
Well have fun on your next trip to the "build a woman workshop"0 -
A high maintenance woman will constantly put her man in a position where he must make otherwise unnecessary sacrifices--whether of his money, time, effort, or of his mental/emotional well being--because unlike a normal woman, who can understand and process many different forms of love and affection, she is only capable of understanding sacrifice.
:huh: you've got to be kidding right?
I pay for my own hair, nails, cosmetics, clothes, shoes, procedures, etc. I make more money than my SO. I require nothing from him other than friendship and love. Time, effort and sacrifice for the good of the family is something we BOTH put in and is to be expected for any relationship.
I believe I mentioned having my own definition of low/high maintenance before saying the excerpt you quoted. It has nothing to do with looks. I then went on to say that I do also appreciate a woman who tends to keep the aesthetic stuff to a minimum because I like what it says about her sense of practicality. Take for example high heels. I hate them with a passion. My ideal woman would wear sneakers whenever the situation permitted because of their practicality.
mmmk.
Well have fun on your next trip to the "build a woman workshop"
Ummm... k?0 -
What defines high maintenance?
1. Do I color my hair : yes
2. Do I paint my nails : yes
3. Do I generally dress cute to go out : yes
4. Do I wear makeup: BB cream, mascara and lipgloss or lipstick ( so Yes)
5. Do I have a job and make my own money : HELL YES ( My husband is actually the one at home, he is trying to get a job but the economy is hard)
6. Do I do it for him...NO ( other than the occasional mini skirt and heels) I do it because I like the way I look, I take care of my skin, nails and hair for me...Can I be ready in 10 min with a shower yes....normally I run 45 though. I am never late to an event/dinner whatever ( 15 min early is the standard)
Am I high maintenance YES, but honestly that has nothing to do with beauty routine...
Why is high mainenance bad? I see nothing wrong with taking pride in your appearance or your life...0 -
A high maintenance woman will constantly put her man in a position where he must make otherwise unnecessary sacrifices--whether of his money, time, effort, or of his mental/emotional well being--because unlike a normal woman, who can understand and process many different forms of love and affection, she is only capable of understanding sacrifice.
:huh: you've got to be kidding right?
I pay for my own hair, nails, cosmetics, clothes, shoes, procedures, etc. I make more money than my SO. I require nothing from him other than friendship and love. Time, effort and sacrifice for the good of the family is something we BOTH put in and is to be expected for any relationship.
I believe I mentioned having my own definition of low/high maintenance before saying the excerpt you quoted. It has nothing to do with looks. I then went on to say that I do also appreciate a woman who tends to keep the aesthetic stuff to a minimum because I like what it says about her sense of practicality. Take for example high heels. I hate them with a passion. My ideal woman would wear sneakers whenever the situation permitted because of their practicality.
mmmk.
Well have fun on your next trip to the "build a woman workshop"
Ummm... k?
My ideal woman would wear whatever footwear she wants to wear because she's a human being who can make her own decisions, not some plaything that exists to please me.0 -
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Low maintenance as in no color in the hair, don't blow dry/curl or straighten. Little to no makeup at all on a daily basis.
On the other hand, I have a big diamond wedding ring, big diamond necklace and earrings, I get my nails done every 2 weeks. New clothes, new shoes all in style. Louis Vuttion, Gucci and Burberry are some of my favs. So I make up for my "Low" maintenance in other ways. My husband has no problem with it at all...he married me knowing who I was. He loves that I dont have to wear makeup, but loves that I dress in heels everyday. Its a win-win.0 -
My ideal woman would wear whatever footwear she wants to wear because she's a human being who can make her own decisions, not some plaything that exists to please me.
jonnythan... this post is awesome.
:flowerforyou:0 -
A guy will say he wants a low maintenance girl that watches sports and whatever else but when that girl comes along, he tells her he just sees her a friend.0
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I guess it really depends on the guy and what you mean by "low maintenance".
If you mean by "getting made up" standards, I'd say I'm pretty low maintenance. I grew up in a super affluent area where what you wore, what you carried and what you drove determined how you were treated and I got over that FAST. I can appreciate nice things, but I don't have to own them. I don't wear make-up to work every day and usually only if we're going out. I can dress up when I want to, but most of the time I'm pretty relaxed (mind you, this is not sweats and yoga clothes all day long).
However, I think I'm mentally high maintenance. I require someone who can hold their own with me intellectually. I need someone I can have debates with on a variety of topics, someone who's got an opinion and a backbone. I need someone who's also emotionally sensitive and can communicate well. In that way, I am very demanding. I expect a lot, because I give a lot.
I love playing the house wife - I love cooking, keeping a house clean, growing a garden, taking care of my man. I don't expect him to do his "half" in house chores, but if I'm doing the cooking, cleaning, and laundry, he better not give me attitude when I ask him to take the trash out. Luckily, I've found a guy who makes me feel appreciated and is respectful, and never fails to help me on the occasions I need him to take the trash out, grab something, etc.
ETA: I guess in my case, I think guys DO like a high maintenance woman - someone who challenges them and expects them to hold their own, even if they say they don't. Men need a challenge. How many guys do you know get complacent and bored in their relationships? How many women do you know get upset because their significant others just don't "try" anymore? No expectations = no results.0 -
the way i see it, it's not JUST about how many hours you put into grooming/primping/shopping/manicuring/ect, but, is also (and just as importantly) about how comfortable and confident a woman is with going without.
if a chick FREAKS OUT and becomes all self conscious because her roots are showing, she's not dressed in designer, your gift to her wasn't big enough or expensive enough, needs a manicure, gets dirty, has a zit on her face, or maybe didn't get her full 45 minutes of get-ready-time this morning, then she's high maintenance (and you probably need to get as far away from her as possible.)0 -
My ideal woman would wear whatever footwear she wants to wear because she's a human being who can make her own decisions, not some plaything that exists to please me.
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I think I am low maintenance, and that is what my husband seems to prefer. We work together so we spend all day together. We run/manage a used RV lot, so he sees me all day scrubbing floors, walls, ceilings, other peoples bathrooms and kitchens. My work wear is old jeans and t shirts. I don't west anything that I would be upset if it got ruined with bleach or cleaner. I spend 10-15 minutes each morning putting on eye makeup and brushing my hair and teeth. At the end of the day, I am a sweaty mess, and feel gross. He doesn't even care.
When I do get dressed up, for church on the weekends or for a date, he is amazed. He has told me that he would not think that I am as capable as I am if I dressed "prissy" all the time. The fact that its a once a week thing, makes it have more impact. But I do love the dressing up, it makes me feel beautiful and feminine.
ETA: my current profile pic was taken while we were doing a weekend outing together. This is more effort than a work day, but not as dressed up as a real date. I still only spent about 30 minutes getting ready that day.0 -
I really don't care how long a woman takes to get ready or how much she spends on getting her hair done - if it makes her feel good about herself then it's money well spent. I don't consider that to be high maintenance to be honest!
Chronic insecurity and nagging are two things that would make someone high maintenance to me...that's the things headaches are made of!
PS - I should say unjustified nagging...us blokes do need nagging sometimes
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There is a difference between "low maintenance" and "no maintenance". Wearing makeup (natural, not caked on), at least brushing the hair, if not styling it to some degree, making sure your clothes are neat and your legs etc are shaved... those are just a normal part of a woman's routine. Sure, there are guys out there who prefer women with hairy legs and no makeup, but it shouldn't be looked down on when women take care of themselves and make an effort to look pretty.
As for the women whose boyfriends pay for them to get their hair done, their nails done, take them clothes shopping, and hold their purse, I will just say this: where do I get one of those??? I've never even attempted to ask a boyfriend to pay for my salon visit, and I didn't know there were guys out there who actually do that! I would say that's more wrongdoing on the guy's part than the girl's. She's not high-maintenance, he's just on a leash!0 -
A high maintenance woman will constantly put her man in a position where he must make otherwise unnecessary sacrifices--whether of his money, time, effort, or of his mental/emotional well being--because unlike a normal woman, who can understand and process many different forms of love and affection, she is only capable of understanding sacrifice.
:huh: you've got to be kidding right?
I pay for my own hair, nails, cosmetics, clothes, shoes, procedures, etc. I make more money than my SO. I require nothing from him other than friendship and love. Time, effort and sacrifice for the good of the family is something we BOTH put in and is to be expected for any relationship.
I believe I mentioned having my own definition of low/high maintenance before saying the excerpt you quoted. It has nothing to do with looks. I then went on to say that I do also appreciate a woman who tends to keep the aesthetic stuff to a minimum because I like what it says about her sense of practicality. Take for example high heels. I hate them with a passion. My ideal woman would wear sneakers whenever the situation permitted because of their practicality.
mmmk.
Well have fun on your next trip to the "build a woman workshop"
Ummm... k?
My ideal woman would wear whatever footwear she wants to wear because she's a human being who can make her own decisions, not some plaything that exists to please me.
And you're reading into this and getting what exactly? I would want that because of what it says about her personality. Not because she's doing it for me. You people are reading WAY too much into that.0 -
A high maintenance woman will constantly put her man in a position where he must make otherwise unnecessary sacrifices--whether of his money, time, effort, or of his mental/emotional well being--because unlike a normal woman, who can understand and process many different forms of love and affection, she is only capable of understanding sacrifice.
:huh: you've got to be kidding right?
I pay for my own hair, nails, cosmetics, clothes, shoes, procedures, etc. I make more money than my SO. I require nothing from him other than friendship and love. Time, effort and sacrifice for the good of the family is something we BOTH put in and is to be expected for any relationship.
I believe I mentioned having my own definition of low/high maintenance before saying the excerpt you quoted. It has nothing to do with looks. I then went on to say that I do also appreciate a woman who tends to keep the aesthetic stuff to a minimum because I like what it says about her sense of practicality. Take for example high heels. I hate them with a passion. My ideal woman would wear sneakers whenever the situation permitted because of their practicality.
mmmk.
Well have fun on your next trip to the "build a woman workshop"
Ummm... k?
My ideal woman would wear whatever footwear she wants to wear because she's a human being who can make her own decisions, not some plaything that exists to please me.
And you're reading into this and getting what exactly? I would want that because of what it says about her personality. Not because she's doing it for me. You people are reading WAY too much into that.
Wait.
So.
High Heels = High Maintenance? :huh:
ooooohhhhhhhhhh kaaaaaaaay.
I have a closet full of high heels that I love to wear. Why? Because I like the way they look. They make me feel sexy and tall. They make my legs look long and my butt look great. I wear sneakers ONLY if I am going to be doing a lot of walking as I feel sneakers are quite dumpy.
"Sneakers whenever permitted" *snickers* Now that's funny. If I was with a man and he told me what I can and can't wear on my feet (or in general) because of something HE perceives you bet your butt I"d tell him to take a hike.
So, along with the sneakers does your "ideal woman" also have your dinner ready and waiting for you when you walk through the door from a hard days work? Does she massage your feet and obey your every command and does she end every sentence with "yes master"?0 -
A high maintenance woman will constantly put her man in a position where he must make otherwise unnecessary sacrifices--whether of his money, time, effort, or of his mental/emotional well being--because unlike a normal woman, who can understand and process many different forms of love and affection, she is only capable of understanding sacrifice.
:huh: you've got to be kidding right?
I pay for my own hair, nails, cosmetics, clothes, shoes, procedures, etc. I make more money than my SO. I require nothing from him other than friendship and love. Time, effort and sacrifice for the good of the family is something we BOTH put in and is to be expected for any relationship.
I believe I mentioned having my own definition of low/high maintenance before saying the excerpt you quoted. It has nothing to do with looks. I then went on to say that I do also appreciate a woman who tends to keep the aesthetic stuff to a minimum because I like what it says about her sense of practicality. Take for example high heels. I hate them with a passion. My ideal woman would wear sneakers whenever the situation permitted because of their practicality.
mmmk.
Well have fun on your next trip to the "build a woman workshop"
Ummm... k?
My ideal woman would wear whatever footwear she wants to wear because she's a human being who can make her own decisions, not some plaything that exists to please me.
And you're reading into this and getting what exactly? I would want that because of what it says about her personality. Not because she's doing it for me. You people are reading WAY too much into that.
Wait.
So.
High Heels = High Maintenance? :huh:
ooooohhhhhhhhhh kaaaaaaaay.
I have a closet full of high heels that I love to wear. Why? Because I like the way they look. They make me feel sexy and tall. They make my legs look long and my butt look great. I wear sneakers ONLY if I am going to be doing a lot of walking as I feel sneakers are quite dumpy.
"Sneakers whenever permitted" *snickers* Now that's funny. If I was with a man and he told me what I can and can't wear on my feet (or in general) because of something HE perceives you bet your butt I"d tell him to take a hike.
So, along with the sneakers does your "ideal woman" also have your dinner ready and waiting for you when you walk through the door from a hard days work? Does she massage your feet and obey your every command and does she end every sentence with "yes master"?
Again, reading comprehension. I stated earlier in my original post, which was abbreviated, that it was unrelated. That was another matter entirely. My original post was differentiating my definition of high maintenance from anything pertaining to appearance or grooming and then went on to give examples of both in order to hopefully explain how they differ in my eyes.
Seriously where are you getting this info? Sneakers when permitted = sneakers when at a place whose dress code allowed it. Where are you getting this idea that it's about what I allow? I do not want to be coddled and I do not want a slave girl. I want an independent person. I was merely stating that due to my rather over-the-top practical nature, a woman who was not equally practical (and used wearing heels as opposed to sneakers as an example) would probably not be compatible with me. I was merely stating that I want the type of woman who is too practically minded to ever WANT to wear heels and would only wear them if we were attending some sort of situation where formal dress code REQUIRED it.
I don't know how you can read my original post an extract anything that indicates a controlling nature. You're taking things WAY out of context, and the way you're interpreting it says a lot more about you than you think it does.0 -
I wear minimal makeup with a pony tail most times.. occasionally I wear it down but I usually have a baby trying to pull it out strand by strand. so ouch no. up it goes. It doesnt take me too long.. I think Im low maintenance. I dont think low main. mean you dont care about your appearance just that you dont need 2 hrs to get ready I def think thats a plus. Noone cares that much why waste all that time. haha0
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I exclusively like and pursue high maintenance women.0
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I use to be very big in to hair and make up but my husband always preferred me to look more natural. I haven't worn make up in years and I no longer color my hair. He's never been happier. I also get more compliments now than I did when I was fixing myself up everyday.0
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Quoted for sarcastic truth.No, we LOVE, LOVE, LOVE high maintenance. Please tell me more about the new Ulta in town.
I can tell you the name and availability date of the next Urban Decay palette. Guess if my wife is high or low maintenance?0 -
I am low maintenance pretty much I mean I get my brows waxed and buy hair dye but I rarely wear makeup....0
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My collar and cuffs match does this make me high maintenance0
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